Fighting Ever After (Ever After #3) (29 page)

She placed
both of her palms on my cheeks and brought my face down to hers. “It’s done.
All of that stuff is behind us now. I promise not to hold it against you. I
don’t care what your reasons were. I just want you to be honest with me from
now on. We’re going to have to talk if we want this to work.”

“Okay.” I
nodded and then, with her hands still holding my face, she gingerly pressed her
lips to mine, and I swore there was no feeling in the world – not being on
stage, not getting that record deal, not even sex with any of those girls from
my past – that could compete with being kissed by her.

The rest of
the night was spent lying on my bed. Neither one of us had any desire to rejoin
the party. I know I was perfectly content right where I was. We talked, and
laughed and kissed some more. A lot
more,
and I
decided to make it my personal mission in life to kiss her every chance I got.
I wanted to do everything with her, but it wasn’t about escaping anything or
looking for a quick release. There was nothing about this I wanted to escape. I
wanted to take my time and enjoy every second of it, of her, of us. I was in no
rush to push her further. She could set the pace and as long as I got to hold
her and kiss her sweet lips, that would be enough.

When we took
a break from all the heavy making out like teenagers, because she said she
actually needed to breathe or something ridiculous like that, I pried her with
a million questions. I remembered the picture from her sketch book and asked
her to tell me more about her mom. She told me everything she could remember
from those twelve years that she had her, and then I asked her to tell me about
the time that came after. It broke my heart to hear her admit how alone and
scared she’d felt. How much she’d hated her father for breaking her mom’s
heart, how much she had wished Bas and Chris’ dad could adopt her. She told me
that even though she was afraid of her dad, she’d actually been excited to
learn she had half brothers and a half sister, and how much it had stung when
they rejected her and treated her like an outsider. I wiped away her tears when
they fell, and just let her lay on my chest when she couldn’t talk about it
anymore.

In a way, I
could relate to that rejection. For a lot of years, I’d felt like an outsider
in my own home too. I spent so much time wondering what was wrong with me, why
I couldn’t be who my parents wanted me to be. Eventually I just stopped trying
to be anything for anyone. It was easier than failing, than being let down and
facing that rejection day after day.

She asked me
a few questions of her own, and I knew she wanted to ask more. It wasn’t fair
of me to make her open up so much and
not do the same, but I
couldn’t bring myself to reveal everything to her
. I deflected most of
her questions about my relationship with my parents and again when she asked if
I’d ever had a serious girlfriend before. I would tell her about Elaina
someday. I just wasn’t ready. I still needed to figure out how to let go of
that. My temper and anger were issues I needed to work on, and I didn’t want
Jax to feel like she needed to fix me or save me. I just wanted to be there for
her and be stronger for her before I told her.

I’m not sure
how long we stayed up, but eventually I heard her yawn and when I looked at the
clock on my nightstand, I saw that it was after one.

“Sleepy?” I
asked. She nodded. “You should have said something. We can go to bed.” She
smiled shyly. “Go grab your pajamas and then get your butt back in here. Be
warned, I’m going to cuddle the shit out of you. I need to see if what I’ve
been missing is as good as I think it’s going to be.” She jumped up off the bed
and scurried out of the room. I fell back on the bed grinning like an idiot.
When I woke up this morning, or I guess technically yesterday morning, I never
would have thought the night would end like this. I still wasn’t convinced that
this would work, that at some point she wouldn’t want out, but I knew if I
didn’t do everything I could to make her stay, I would regret it. That was a
regret I wanted nothing to do with. That’s the kind of regret you don’t get
past and haunts you for the rest of your life.

Speaking of
regret, I was starting to wonder if Jax was already rethinking her decision.
She still hadn’t come back from the bathroom. I got up and changed into a pair
of cotton pajama pants and sat back down on the bed to wait. After another
minute I was afraid I’d put too much pressure on her, or now that I wasn’t
distracting her with my mouth and tongue, she was running scared. I got up to
go find her and potentially drag her back if I had to. When I pushed my door
open, I realized it wasn’t second thoughts keeping her, it was just Bas.

 “All I
want Jazz, is for you to be happy, and if it’s that jackass who makes it happen
then I’m okay with it.” He wore a pleased smile and I tried not to take offense
at him referring to me as “that jackass.”

“Just make
sure you warn him that if he takes that smile away from you, I will hurt him.”
Neither one of them saw me standing there, listening in.

“Don’t
worry, that’s the last thing I want to happen.”

Jax  turned
to fully face me and I took a second to
appreciate her choice in sleepwear. Her tiny shorts were more like underwear.
All I wanted to do was get her back into my bed, even if no clothing would be
coming off. “You took too long,” I explained why I was out there. “I was coming
out here to make sure you hadn’t changed your mind and to drag you back if you
had,” I joked even though it was the truth.

She said
goodnight to Bas and he nodded at me when her back was to him. Then I entwined
my fingers with hers and pulled her back into my room. I flipped off the light,
but left the small bedside lamp on so that we could see to get into bed, and I
wasn’t ready to stop looking at her. I climbed in first, lying on my back and
pulling her so that her head rested on my chest. She laid her arm across my
stomach, her elbow bent so that her hand rested just below her chin, over my
heart. It was fitting since she now held such a big piece of it. Or maybe she’d
had it for a while now. That was a tiny bit terrifying.

I’d made
that promise to myself so long ago, that I would never let another girl in. I
knew it was one made out of anger, humiliation and betrayal; one made by a
teenage kid who’d lost all faith and belief in something more than the bitter
loneliness I’d lived with for so long under my parents’ roof. Jaxyn was
returning some of that faith and belief to me, but still it was hard to let go
of something I’d held onto for so long. I wanted to though; more than anything
I wanted to let go of everything except Jax and the future.

I curled my
left arm up and placed my hand on her hip where her t shirt had ridden up. I
rubbed my thumb gently over the skin there, and we
laid
like that until she couldn’t keep her eyes open any longer. I reached to turn
off the lamp and it wasn’t ten minutes before she was asleep in my arms.

It took me a
little while longer to fall asleep. I think I was afraid that I would wake up
and discover this had all been some cruel dream. I’d had a lot of dreams in my
life. When I was five I wanted to fly. When I was eight I wanted to play the
violin so well that I would finally make my mom proud. When I was fifteen, I
wanted to marry Elaina. When I was twenty two, I wanted to make it as a
musician. All but one of those dreams had faded into disappointment and crushed
hopes, but none of them compared to the fragile dream springing to life inside
of me right now. Possibility and hope could be dangerous things, but what was
life if you didn’t walk on the dangerous side once in a while, and fuck, some
people might say I lived on the dangerous side.

It wasn’t a
dream.

It
definitely wasn’t a dream.

No dream
could feel this good, this vivid,
this
. . . real.

My body was
hot, like I’d slept curled up with a space heater. Long hair was fanned out all
over the place, to the point that if I breathed through my mouth, I would
inhale a mouthful and probably suffocate. There was a knee pressing
uncomfortably between my legs creating problems down there, and I think the
stickiness on my chest may have been a bit of drool, or sweat.
Probably both.

It was
fucking perfect. Okay, not so much, but the girl sleeping soundly, wrapped
around me like a spider monkey, was. Her cheek was flat against my chest and
each little puff of breath tickled across my collarbone as her chest rose and
fell in time with mine. I reached a hand up to attempt to sweep her hair out of
my face and then tucked the rest of it behind her ear so that I could see her
face.

Her hand
slid down my chest coming to rest just above my abdomen, at the same time her
leg that was thrown across mine, shifted higher. I tensed slightly, not because
it was painful, quite the opposite, but there was no way she wouldn’t feel me
pressing into her when she woke up. There wasn’t much I could do about it. Even
when there wasn’t a beautiful girl in bed with me, it was not uncommon to wake
up in this predicament. I adjusted slightly and put my hand on her thigh,
giving it a gentle nudge lower. Her whole body shifted and thankfully she
didn’t lift her leg back up.

I could tell
it wouldn’t be long before she woke up, so I decided I might as well help her
get there sooner. I rubbed my hand up and down her hip and thigh. The other I
tangled in the mess that was her hair, tilting her head just enough that I
could press kisses on her forehead and down her nose. She emitted a sleepy
little groan and her eyes fluttered once and then twice before she pried them
open and looked at me.

“What are
you doing?” her throat was dry and her voice was nothing more than a sleepy
little croak.

I chuckled
softly, “I’m kissing my girlfriend good morning.” I softly touched my lips to
hers and then pulled back just a fraction of an inch, whispering against her
mouth, “I believe that’s one of the perks that
comes
with this relationship. Is it not?”

“Definitely,”
she sighed blissfully and then attempted to close the distance between us, but
I pulled back, just barely.

“Then I
should do it again?” I teased against her lips, not quite giving her what she
wanted.

“Mmhmm.”
Her voice was breathless and her eyes
pleading,
and I had no choice but to give in to the temptation of those lips.

It was a
long time before I snuck out of bed to retrieve a couple bowls of cereal and
bring them back. If I had my way, we wouldn’t leave the bed all day, except to
get food and use the bathroom, and I expected she wouldn’t put up much of a
protest. As it was, I was having a hard time finishing my breakfast because she
kept distracting me with soft little kisses all over my stomach and chest.

“Eat your
breakfast before I decide to eat you,” I told her.

She giggled
and shoved a bite of cereal in her mouth.

“Be careful
Princess, you’re playing with fire, teasing me like that,” I warned. She
glanced up at me playfully, but the weight of my desire must have shown in my
eyes and her playful smile quickly became a nervous one.

“Sorry,” she
mumbled, “I’m just . . .”

“Just what?”

She paused to
draw in a deep breath and blow it back out, “Happy.”

“Me too,” I
told her and then took both our half empty bowls and set them aside on the
nightstand. I pulled her up to the head of the bed and then covered her body
with mine. After that, breakfast was forgotten, the only sustenance either one
of us seemed interested in was each other.

It was only
later that she reminded me that we had plans for the day. Chris’ dad was having
a backyard barbecue, something I would usually look forward to, but today it held
no interest for me if it meant leaving this bed.

“Come on, we
need to get ready,” she insisted, trying to extricate herself from the blankets
we had tangled around us.

“Are you
sure you don’t just want to skip it and stay in bed all day?” I wrapped my arms
around her waist and pulled her back to me, nuzzling my face in the crook of
her neck. I felt her resistance crumbling and I was pretty sure I had her right
up until Ace and Spade started beating on the door.

“You two get
your asses out of bed and into the shower.
Separately.
It’s one o’clock in the afternoon and you two haven’t come out of there,” Ace
called through the locked door.

“If you two
don’t start getting ready for the barbecue, we’re coming in there and dragging
you out. I don’t care if you’re naked. In fact Rainbow, if you’re naked tell me
now and I’ll be right in.” I glared at the door and then reached over Jax to
pick up one of my boots from beside the bed and launch it at the door. It
landed with a thud and both of them burst into laughter on the other side.

“Sorry to
disappoint you Spade, but we’re both fully clothed so you might as well just go
away,” Jax shouted.

“Not until
you guys get up.”

“I tried,”
she shrugged and I groaned.

They didn’t
go away. They continued to bang on the door and give us shit until I finally
got up and yanked it open. “You guys are assholes.”

“Yeah, yeah.
Get over it and get your ass ready. We’re
leaving in an hour. You can resume your love fest tonight.” Spade winked at Jax
over my shoulder and then gave me a sharp look. “I would also like to mention
that if you keep her locked up in there and she quits cooking and baking for
us, I’m probably going to stab you.”

“Can you
blame me for wanting to keep her to myself?” I asked.

“Nah man.
I know if she were mine I’d have her-”

 “If
you don’t want me to break your nose, then don’t even think about finishing
that sentence.” I did not want to hear all the things he would do with her. I
didn’t even want him thinking about it.

Ace just
shook his head and Spade laughed at my threat, but he wouldn’t find it so funny
when I went through with it. I could already tell it was going to be a long
day. Spade wasn’t about to stop, no matter how many threats I made. They were
enjoying themselves too much, and from the smile splitting
Jax’s
lips, they weren’t the only amused ones.

I slammed
the door in their faces and then turned to her.
“Looks like
we have to go.”

“Oh suck it
up, it will be fun.” She hopped up from the bed and smacked me on the arm as
she tried to brush past me. I snaked an arm around her waist before she could
make it to the door.

“You know
what would be more fun,” I said suggestively, thinking of so many ways that I
could have fun with her that would make her forget all about the barbecue, and
the rest of the world.

“I don’t
want to hear it,” she laughed, only I didn’t quite believe her. I started
tickling her sides and she swatted at my hands. “Behave.”

“But being
bad is so much more fun,” I said releasing her and she walked over to the door.
“Hey,” I stopped her with her hand on the door knob and she looked back at me
over her shoulder. “Why don’t you just go get your stuff from Chris’ room and
bring it all in here,” I suggested.

She arched
an eyebrow at me, seemingly surprised. “You sure you want me invading your
space so soon?”

“No, but at
least this way I’ll have more opportunities to have my wicked way with you.” I
grinned. She just rolled her eyes and exited the room. She did however return a
few minutes later with all her stuff in tow.

“Where should
I put it?” She looked around the room.

“Wherever.
You can hang stuff in the closet if you need to, or shove my
shit out of your way in the drawers.” I walked over to my dresser and pulled
out a clean pair of boxer briefs and blue jeans. When I turned back around she
was still standing in the middle of my room with her bags in her hands, trying
to decide what to do with them.

I walked
over and took one of them from her, setting it down on the floor. “Look, I’m
serious, put your stuff wherever and you don’t need to feel like you’re
invading my space. I want you in my space,” I took a step closer, pressing the
length of my body up against hers, skimming my finger up her bare arm. “In fact
I want you in a lot more than my just my space, so if you’d like to join me in
the shower as well . . .”

She shook
her head and gave me a gentle push. “What have I gotten myself into?”

“Oh you just
wait and see.” I winked and kissed her cheek before heading for the shower. We
really didn’t have a lot of time before we had to leave and I wanted her to
have plenty of time in the shower if she needed it, so I made it quick and then
hopped back out. I dried myself off and dressed quickly. I hadn’t grabbed a
shirt or a belt, so my jeans were hanging low on my hips and that was the first
thing Jax noticed when I walked into the room, arm raised, drying my hair with
the towel I was holding. I didn’t think I would ever get tired of seeing her
look at me that way, like she also wanted to be doing all the naughty things I
imagined in my head.

I walked
toward her and tossed the towel at her face. “You better quit looking at me
like that or I can promise you we won’t make it to that barbecue.”

She batted
the towel out of her face and it landed on the floor. She went back to
rummaging through her bags, pulling different articles of clothing out. One in
particular caught my eye. I snagged it out of her hands and held it up.

“Oh hell
yes, you should definitely wear this one.” It was a tiny scrap of a . . . well,
a dress I think, but it was tiny, black and would look sexy as fuck on her.

“Oh really,”
she took it from my hands, “you want me to wear this out in public, for
everyone to see?
Everyone including Spade?”

“
Nevermind
.
You better fucking burn
that thing. On second thought,” I snatched it back, “I’m just going to save
this for later. You can give me a private fashion show, and then maybe a
private lap dance,” I added hopefully.

“Don’t count
on it.” She pulled a different dress from her bag and disappeared to take her
shower. The dress she came out wearing wasn’t nearly as tight or revealing, but
she looked incredible and I still got to stare at her awesome legs. Unfortunately
so did Spade and he didn’t hesitate to point that out as we were leaving.

Unfortunately,
Jax in a dress, while stunning, meant no motorcycle, which also meant that Ace
and Spade decided to ride with us. I couldn’t send them with Chris and Marcus
because they’d already left to pick up their dates.

The entire
ride there, I had to listen to Spade flirt with Jaxyn, and it didn’t matter
that I knew he was only doing it to rile me, it worked. As soon as I’d parked
in
Jax’s
driveway and cut the engine, the back door
flew open and Spade took off. A lot could be said about him, but he wasn’t
stupid. I was right behind him, chasing him across the driveway, through Dr.
Cross’ yard and around the side of the house. He was almost to the back yard
and I was just about on him when he turned and squared off with me. He was
smiling, so damn pleased with himself.

When Jax and
Ace came around the corner, I had my arm locked around his neck and his arms
were wrapped around me as he struggled to break free. “I’m flattered Ky, really
I am, but why are you so busy trying to get your hands on me when you’ve got a
girl that looks like that,” he chuckled and nodded his head behind me as much
as he could. I looked and saw her walking our way.

 I
shoved him off. “As long as you remember that it’s my hands that get to be on
her.”

“Yeah,
yeah,” he laughed.
“You lucky bastard.”

He didn’t
have to tell me that. I already knew it; I just wish it hadn’t taken me so long
to get here. I wasted a lot of time that we could have spent together, working
so hard to keep her away, for nothing. I walked toward her, meeting her
halfway. “Have I told you how gorgeous you look in that dress?” I put my hands
on her hips and tugged her body in closer to mine.

“You like
it?” She stepped back and did a little half twirl, teasing me with the way it
flared up, exposing more of her legs.

“I do. I
really, really do.” I pressed my lips to her forehead before tucking her into
my side and leading her into the back yard.

As far as
Sunday afternoons went, this one was about as close to perfect as it got. Good
food, great friends and an amazing girl that I couldn’t keep my hands off of,
no matter how many looks and eye rolls we got. I never thought that I would
want all of this. I’d been so sure I would make a terrible boyfriend, but with
Jax I wasn’t forcing myself to do anything. She just made me want different
things; like sharing seats and sodas. I pulled her into my lap every chance I
got and didn’t hesitate to hand her my drink when she said she was thirsty –
two things that usually annoyed me.