Finding Chase (Chasing Nikki) (15 page)

“No one expects you to stop loving her, Chase. You can keep those feelings with you for the rest of forever. But think about it . . . what if it had been you that died? Would you want her to sit around and suffer for the rest of her life?”

“No.” I didn’t even have to ponder on it. “I’d want her to be happy too, even if it was without me. I love her.”

“Then why do you keep torturing yourself? Take your own advice, and assume she’d feel the same way. Keep loving her—love the things she gave you—those are yours to keep. It’s okay to open your heart and share it with someone else too. You and Britt—well, I think you’d work really well together. You should see where it might go.”

I grinned again. “When did you get so smart?”

“When I had to watch my best friend agonize over his broken heart, and I couldn’t do anything about it.”

“I’m sorry I’ve been difficult to live with. I swear, I’ve been trying to get past things, I’m just not really sure how to do it.”

“Well, I think you’re on the right track. I say keep doing whatever you’re doing right now. You’re . . . glowing.” He snickered.

“You’re a dork. Fresh muffins . . . that’s what’s making me “glow.” I’m going to pick some up and surprise your sister with breakfast. It won’t be my grandma’s muffins, but I figure it’ll do in a pinch. You want some?”

“No, Tana wants to do something with me later. Thanks though.”

“All right. Catch ya in few then.”

I left the apartment, my heart feeling lighter than it had in months. I wasn’t sure how things were going to work out, but for the first time in ages I was truly excited for the future.

I knocked loudly on the door and waited, box of baked goods in hand. After a minute, I frowned and knocked again. There was still no answer, so I tried the knob. I shook my head when I found it unlocked again, and I opened the door a crack.

“Hello?” I called. There was no answer, but I could hear the shower running and the girls carrying on a conversation.

I stepped inside, going to the kitchen counter and searching for a piece of paper and a pen, so I could leave a note. I peeked around the corner and saw the bathroom door open. Tana was sitting on the sink talking to Brittney.

“I bet you’re excited,” Tana said.

“I am,” Brittney’s voice came from behind the shower curtain, which did nothing to help my rabid imagination. “I’ve always liked him, Tana, but he was Nikki’s guy from the get go, and I was with Matt. I never thought of him as someone I’d be with.”

They were talking about me. I froze in place, unable to resist eavesdropping.

“We’ve been friends for a long time,” she continued, “and I’m kind of afraid to tamper with that, but something is different now. I honestly can’t stop thinking about him.”

I grinned to myself. The feeling was mutual.

“I know he’s always liked you. You two get along really well together. It seems like a no-brainer to me. It’s only natural you’d be drawn to one another.”

“Maybe it’s just weird because . . . you know . . . he’s Nikki’s.”

My heart fell, and I faltered.
Am I really doing the right thing?

“Nikki loved you both, and she hated Matt if I can remind you. I think if she knew there was no way she and Chase could ever be together, she’d be thrilled two of the people she loved most found each other.”

“Really?” Brittney replied, and I thought I heard her release a strangled sound. “Because this has been a really hard decision for me. I feel like I’m stabbing her in the back and trying to steal her boyfriend—like I’m betraying her memory.”

Emotions swirled around me. I might be on the other side of this situation, but I understood exactly what she meant.

“Don’t feel that way. I think she’d tell you to go for it. She’d want you to be happy.”

“Would you feel that way if it was Brett we were talking about.”

Tana was quiet for several moments. “I’d like to think I would,” she finally replied. “But the fact of the matter is, Nikki’s dead, and Chase has no future with her. They are done and over with. He needs to move on, and so do you.”

I was starting to feel sick. Eavesdropping wasn’t such a good idea after all. I hated hearing Nikki’s and my relationship discussed so bluntly. I turned toward the door, leaving the muffins on the counter.

“I want to move on, Tana. He does funny things to me.”

I paused, curious about what she meant.

“Funny things?” Tana asked.

“To my body.” She laughed. “Like how my stomach drops as if I were on a roller coaster every time I see him, or my pulse races whenever he touches me.”

Okay, I could stay and listen for a minute longer, I edged closer to the bathroom.

Tana laughed. “I can see how that happens. Chase is hot!”

“He really is. He came home from practice the other night without his shirt on, and I almost died. I wanted to run my hands all over him.”

“You should’ve, I wouldn’t have stopped you,” I said as I leaned against the doorway, and both girls screamed.

“What are you doing?” Tana said, holding her hand to her chest.

“I brought breakfast. You two need to start locking your door. Anyone could walk right in.”

“How much did you hear?” Brittney asked, sounding horrified.

“I heard enough.” I chuckled as I folded my arms. “Please feel free to continue. I find the discussion to be quite stimulating.”

“Get out!” she ordered, and Tana jumped off the counter and pushed me out the door.

“But I brought you breakfast, and I want to hear what else you have to say,” I hollered as I struggled with Tana. “You were talking about rubbing your hands all over me. Please go on!”

She growled, and Tana continued shoving me down the hall. “Go home!” she ordered.

“Okay, okay. You don’t have to be snotty about it. I’m leaving.” I pointed to the box on the counter. “There’s breakfast. And lock your door!”

She smiled at me as I left, and I couldn’t stop grinning. That was fun.

Chapter Seventeen

I was still grinning when Britt walked into the apartment fifteen minutes later carrying the box.

“For someone who preaches locking the door, you might wish to follow your own advice.”

“I’m a guy, it’s different.”

“Wow, that’s sexist.”

I shrugged. “It’s the truth.”

“If a burglar came in here and shot you, you’d die as easily as I would.” She gave me an arched look. “We aren’t in Silver Creek anymore.”

“Point taken.” I couldn’t take my eyes off her—she was beautiful—wet hair combed straight, no makeup, and wearing a form-fitting tank top and shorts which showed her perfect figure and luminescent skin. I wanted to touch her—everywhere.

“Thank you for breakfast, but I wanted to share it with you.”

“That was my initial plan, before I was roughly thrown from your apartment. Have a seat.” I gestured to the spot on the couch, and she came to join me.

“This was very sweet of you. I love blueberry muffins.” She opened the box and handed one to me.

“I know. I remember Nikki, Tana, and you used to get them all the time from the bakery.”

She smiled softly. “It’s a wonder we weren’t a bunch of lard butts. I miss doing things like that with the two of them. Nikki’s gone and Tana spends most of her time with Brett. I always feel like a third wheel when I tag along.”

“So what do you say to starting some new traditions? Maybe Muffin Mondays with your new boyfriend? It’ll give you something to look forward to.”

Her smile grew wider. “I have a new boyfriend? I thought we were just dating.”

“Hmmm. That does change things, doesn’t it? I was under the impression you and I were going to date exclusively. I don’t know if I’m the sharing type.”

She giggled. “I’m only messing with you. I wanted to see what you’d say.” She popped a piece of muffin into her mouth.

I slid my arm behind her on the sofa and leaned in real close, my forehead almost touching hers. “Don’t tease me, Brittney, I’m still too fragile,” I whispered seriously. “I don’t want you to date anyone else, only me, exclusive—
I
want to be your boyfriend.”

Her breath stilled, and she quit chewing, swallowing as my lips brushed against the side of her face. She closed her eyes and tilted her head as I feathered lightly down to the pulse point in her neck.

A small moan escaped her, and I pulled away slightly. Her eyes flew open and she stared at me. “Why’d you stop?”

I grinned. “Who’s your boyfriend?”

“You are,” she replied without hesitation.

I kissed her neck again, and she sighed, smiling. I didn’t want to stop, but I knew she wanted to be careful, so I moved away.

She gave an exasperated huff. “Why’d you stop this time?”

“Because
my girlfriend
told me she wanted to take things slowly. Slow is not gonna happen if I keep touching you like this. Regardless of how things ended up the last time we kissed, my body can’t help but remember the feel of you underneath me, and it’s kinda anxious for a repeat performance. If you know what I mean.” I arched an eyebrow.

Her eyes widened and she blushed. “I know what you mean.”

“Good. Now eat your muffin.” I broke a piece off and held it up to her mouth. She grinned slyly and took it, licking and sucking at the tips of my fingers in the processes. I groaned. “You aren’t playing fair, Britt.”

“Neither are you, getting me all hot and bothered with your kisses. I was only returning the favor.”

“Keep it up and you’re gonna land flat on your back.”

“Why do I think you’re being completely serious?”

“Because I am. If I had my way I’d throw you over my shoulder right now and carry you off into the other room.”

“Boys and their hormones,” she muttered. “Always raging.”

I laughed. “What do you expect when you girls keep driving us crazy with your maddening, sexy, antics.”

“Can you not molest my twin while I’m in the same house and within hearing distance?” Brett asked, wandering in and plopping in the chair before reaching for the box of muffins. His blond hair was poking up all over the place, and he scratched his head, blinking rapidly like he was still trying to wake up.

Britt and I both laughed. “I’m afraid I can’t promise that, no,” I replied, the mood effectively broken. “Besides, I thought you were thrilled I was going to be molesting your sister.”

“As bad as that sounds, I am thrilled about it. I can’t think of anything better than my twin hooking up with my bro. It doesn’t mean I want to see it happen—or hear it either.” He took a large bite, chewing as he glanced between us.

“I think it would be appropriate payback for what you and Tana have put us through repeatedly,” Brittney said. She slipped her hand in mine, lacing our fingers together, and I felt a thrill course through me.

I couldn’t help staring while she looked at me, and I forgot Brett was sitting there. Suddenly all I could see was Brittney—all I could feel was the way she was making my heart race—all I knew was how excited I was to see where our dating would take us, and I realized for the first time in a long while what I was feeling. Hope. I had hope for the future again. She’d restored that for me.

I leaned in and kissed her mouth. “Thank you.”

She looked confused. “For what?”

“For everything.” I left it at that as Brett grumbled beside us, but I wished I could show her what I meant. Something was changing inside me, and I knew she was the reason why.

“Pedal faster,” I groaned as the droning sound of a low flying airplane came from overhead. I looked up, watching for a moment as the jet prepared for landing at Sky Harbor, then glanced toward Brittney. “You aren’t doing your share, and the boat is going in circles.”

“I’m trying,” she growled, glaring as the ripples in the water of Tempe Town Lake swirled around our small craft, reflecting some of the newer high-rise buildings which had grown up around it. “Some of us aren’t blessed with legs from the football gods. My flabby limbs don’t have a quarter of the muscles yours do.”

I snorted. “Well, then that’s the hottest dang flab I’ve ever seen.” I eyed her long legs from her lace up sandals to her short shorts. “They look pretty fit to me.”

“They aren’t as good as they used to be. Since I’m not doing cheer anymore, I’ve gotten out of shape.”

“Don’t kid yourself. You look perfect. There’s not an ounce of fat on you.”

“That’s because I sweat it all off the moment we got out of the car. Seriously, Chase. It’s one hundred and fifteen degrees. Let’s go lay on your couch under the ceiling fan in your nice air-conditioned apartment.”

I looked at her flushed face. Her skin did kind of resemble a tomato. Maybe I should take her in.

I shook my head. “I can’t do that.”

“Why not?” She looked confused.

“Because the couch is dangerous territory. Since I’ve agreed to go slow with you, I don’t think it’s a wise place for us to be together.”