Flesh and Feathers (16 page)

“That doesn’t sound silly at all. It sounds like your mother was very special.”

I chuckled. “She used to make these little marshmallow cakes when I had had a bad day. She thought the cure for every ailment was sweets.”

“What did she look like?” Gage asked.

“Exactly like me, only she was beautiful. Anytime we would go somewhere, people would stop and stare at her. She would tell me they were looking at me, but I always knew the truth–it was her.
 

“Az, I don’t think you are giving yourself enough credit. You stopped me in my tracks when I first saw you.”

I blurted out a loud laugh. “That’s because I tried to attack you when you were fixing your mailbox.”

“That’s true. I don’t think I’ve ever been so scared in my life.” He made a fake tremble, and I rolled my eyes at him.
 

“Gage, are you really going to stay here tonight? I just don’t want to be alone. I think I’ve done too much of that here lately.”

His face was kind. “I don’t have anywhere else to be.”

“And by the way, I don’t snore nearly as loud as Jen,” I said teasingly.

Gage laughed, and then I snuggled down into the nook of his arm.

***

I woke up in a gasp. I might have been dreaming, but I wasn’t sure. Whatever it was had melted away the moment my eyes opened.

As I lay there, a light shone through the cracked door, and I could hear faint whispers. Not really whispers per say, but maybe a conversation that was being absorbed behind thick walls.
 

I looked over and noticed Gage was gone. I got up and poked my head out of the room, peering down the hall. It seemed no one was around, and it took a minute to figure out the direction of the sounds.

Staying close to the wall, I followed the muffled noise several doors down from my own. I could make out Tannah’s voice, and what I was sure was Gage’s. I didn’t hear Jen speak, but I knew she had to be in there from the sound of stilettos pacing back and forth on the hard floor. Then there was a low male voice that was distorted by the bulky door. I couldn’t hear what he was saying at all–it was more like a constant hum.

I heard Tannah in a frustrated voice, “I don’t care of the danger. You shouldn’t have come here.”

Then the man’s voice took a tone that I could hear…, one that I recognized. “I came because of her,” he said.

Before I could process what I was doing, I flung the door open. Gage was sitting beside the fireplace with a mixture of irritation and distress on his face. Jen had paused next to the window, and Tannah stood directly in the center of the room. Everyone froze at my intrusion and faces went blank, except for Tannah’s who seem to show a small sign of defeat.

“What is going on?” I demanded.

A man rose from a seat that had been facing Tannah and away from me. Tannah cut her eyes at him. “Kale,” she said, speaking in a low growl.

“Kale?” I questioned confused.

He turned to face me, and my heart stopped. “Kale.” His name left a sting as it left my lips.

Pictures, images, and feelings flooded my mind like someone had opened a door that was bursting at the seams. They came so fast and hard it was difficult to breath in between them. I saw the first time we met; the way he cared for me when I was hurt; all the times he walked me home from work; how he would look at me–wanting to hold me; our night at the lounge–our first kiss; the weekend at the beach house; and finally I saw the way
I
loved him, completely consumed by him.

Jen was the first to speak. “Az, I know you feel really confused right now, but if you would just sit…”

I cut her off speaking firmly, but not letting the anger take over my voice. “I’m not confused.” This wasn’t a total lie. I wasn’t confused. I was far past confused, but I was also starting to realize quite a few things. I turned towards Tannah, addressing her first. “You did this.” I wasn’t sure exactly what it was she had done, but the look on her face confirmed my accusation.

“Jen, you knew… and you did nothing!”

Kale took a step towards me. “Azaleigh…”

I stepped back, not accepting his forward. “You…, you are the worst one of them all.” Unable to control them, tears filled my eyes, overflowing and streaking my face. “You left.” It was hard to say and came out as a whisper. I was more devastated by his abandonment than anything the others could have done. “You knew how I felt about you.” Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Gage squirm in his seat, the comment disconcerting him.

I looked at all of their faces, anger replacing my tears. “How dare you…. You can’t just cut out the pieces of my life because it doesn’t suit yours. I
am
still a person.”
 

I turned to leave, stopping just short of the door. I lowered my voice. “You say you’re angels…, that you protect free-will. Well guess what? You just took mine from me.” I looked over at Gage. “You once told me you wanted it to be real. Do you remember that? I think, now, that you are the only one who was real.”
 

I stormed back to my room, slamming the door as hard as possible and then locking it. I had never been so angry. To add to my frustration, I couldn’t even leave. I was trapped here by people who had betrayed me. I paced the room back and forth wishing life was simple again. I sat down in front of the small vanity that set next to the window and stared at my reflection. I guess maybe I was hoping that if I stared long enough, the girl staring back at me would have some kind of answer. But I didn’t.
 

I turned my head at the sound of the doorknob shaking and then a hard rap at the door.

“Azaleigh! Open the door! We need to talk!” Kale shouted from the other side.

“Go away!” I snapped back.

“Az, open this door now!”

I didn’t respond. I just sat quietly, and after a second I assumed he had given up. Then I heard a small movement, and without warning the door exploded. Splinters of wood went flying in all directions. My first reaction was to duck. Then standing up, I looked at Kale as he walked through the doorway, shaking his hand where his fist had impacted with the door.

“What the hell is wrong with you?” I shouted. I had never seen him so furious. His eyes were locked on me, and I couldn’t help but quake as he came towards me.
   

“Az, I know you are hurt…”

I cut him off. “You don’t know what hurt is,” I said, spitting the words at him. “You left me here. Obviously, I didn’t mean anything to you.”

“I left, because I had to,” he said through clenched teeth.

“I have nothing to say to you. You are not the only one in my life now. Get out!” All of this time Kale was gone, Gage had been there for me. I refused to turn my back on the feelings I had for him, only to be hurt by Kale again. The thing was… he
wasn’t
Kale.
 

Kale placed his hands on my shoulders and tightened his grip, pulling me close to him. I felt so small and helpless. “You’re foolish.” His words were mean and hurtful. “You think he loves you? All of this is a game to him, Azaleigh. Do you think his behavior is genuine or tolerable?”

“Tolerable?” I spoke, unable to control my anger. “Let me tell you what is
not
tolerable… you letting me fall for you, then vanishing from my life. And what… now you think you can just come back anytime you want? It seems like he’s not the only one playing games.”

Kale let go of me quickly, almost making me lose my balance. “My actions were not irrational. I had to leave… that doesn’t mean I didn’t love you.” I tried hiding the small gasp that left my lungs.

A shadow appeared in the doorway. Gage stood there watching us. I knew he could feel every emotion running through me. “Az? I wanted to check on you, Love.”

I was wrong earlier.
This
was the angriest I had ever seen Kale. His movement was fast. Spinning around, he cuffed Gage in the jaw. The collision pushed Gage back a couple of steps.
 

“Is this payback for Anna? So what, now we’re even?” Kale raged at him. I looked at Gage and then back Kale, trying to understand what they were talking about.

Gage used the back of his hand to wipe a small trail of blood that ran from the corner of his mouth, and then he spat some on the floor. “Far from it,” he said, glaring at Kale.

I couldn’t deal with this. They would kill me… before they could kill each other. “Get out! Both of you!”

***

My first days here, I had spent a lot of time exploring. I learned that the north tower had the best view of the sunset. So the evening following Kale and Gage’s clash, I decided to go there to think. The situation with them had my mind muddled and strained.

I sat at the edge of the stone embrasures and peered out over the sea. The sun danced on the horizon, making the sky turn vibrant shades of caramel and pink. I remembered seeing this kind of sunset in a painting once when I was a child, but I never knew it could really exist until now.
 

The salt in the air wasn’t as heavy today, and the cool wind blowing off the ocean made for the perfect setting. I felt closed in and suffocated inside the castle, but up here there was a sense of freedom that could only be found by listening to the waves beat against the rocky shore.
 

I had no idea how long I would be here, the only thing I could do was enjoy the wondrous things around me. I propped my elbows up on the stone and rested my chin in my hands as I watched the sun slowly make its escape from the sky. As it fell behind the ocean, it pulled the blue of the night down with it, finally letting some of the stars have their time to shine. It was absolutely breathtaking.

I heard a dull thud and turn to see Jen standing behind me. Her wings were extended out, but she briskly tucked them behind her back. I could see her feathers stretching all the way down to the ground. There she stood… in the flesh and feathers.

She smiled softly. “Hey.”

“Hey.” I replied.

She looked out over the ocean and closed her eyes, inhaling a deep breath. “The North Tower was always my favorite. It has the best view of the sunset.”

I looked back out to the sea at where the sun had been only moments ago. “Yeah. It does.” I turned back to Jen. “Did you… fly up here?” She didn’t respond, only smiling at me instead.

“Things are kind of crazy right now,” I continued.

“I know this is hard for you, Az. But everything is going to work out. You just need to have faith.”

She was right. However, having faith was not one of my better qualities.

“Jen–It wasn’t Kale that night at the bar with you, was it?”

She paused, and I could see her revisiting the memory. After a moment of silence, she spoke. “No, it wasn’t. His name is Mitch. It’s a long story.”

“I’m sure I can keep up.” I smiled.

“No one knows about him except for Kale. It would be unacceptable to have a relationship with a human in my position–not to mention dangerous. Kale saw us together one day not too far from the bar. I was terrified that he would tell Tannah. I had put us all in jeopardy by not staying focused on the reason we were here, and I was sure they would send me back.” Then she chuckled to herself. “I should have known better. Kale understood the feelings I had for Mitch and suggested that he come work at the bar. It was easier to keep watch over him–to keep him safe. It wasn’t too hard to convince Mitch. He needed a second job, and of course Kale made it more glorified than it really was. Kale indeed kept his promise. He has never spoken of mine and Mitch’s relationship, and I kept my end of the deal by being careful.”

“How did you meet him?” I questioned.

“That’s an even longer story.” She laughed.

“I want to hear it. You know–I mean–it would be a nice distraction.”

Her eyes squinted in a little smile of their own. She plopped down on the ground, and I took a seat beside of her.

“It was a while ago. I had decided to go downtown for the afternoon. The traffic was hectic, and I was attempting to parallel-park. It seemed I backed in too quickly. I ended up backing into the car behind me.” She grinned and then began looking at her fingers.

“What happened?” I asked.

“Mitch got out and came to my window. I rolled it down, but I couldn’t see his face. The sun was blazing behind him, and only his outline was visible. He was so sweet. He immediately asked if I was okay. I nodded, and got out of the car, and walked to the back of it. Luckily, he didn’t have as much as a scratch on his car, probably because it was older. But I couldn’t say the same for mine. The rear end was dented in pretty badly. When I finally looked up from my car, I couldn’t look away. He looked like an angel himself, with his golden hair and bright blue eyes. I was suddenly overwhelmed with all of these feelings I had never felt. He told me that he worked at an auto shop and could fix the car for me. I said no at first, but he insisted. I don’t think I realized that I had said yes until he was handing me a piece of paper with the address to the shop on it. When I took the paper from his hand, our fingers touched and electricity pulsed through me.” Jen’s tone changed, sounding almost defensive. “I didn’t plan on going. It just happened. I was driving near Ninth Street when I remembered the address. I have to admit, I had thought about him every day since the accident. It was almost as if the car turned itself down the street and pulled into the parking lot. I hesitated, but then got out and walked in. Mitch was working on a bike inside. Standing there, I watched him for the longest time. He just so happened to look up and see me. His eyes lit up.”