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Authors: Kimberly T. Matthews

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BOOK: Fool and Her Honey (9781622860791)
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Chapter 21
Candis
“Happy birthday, beautiful,” I heard a voice say to me from behind.
“Thank you!” I answered before turning around and finding myself standing face-to-face with Russell. Who invited him? I sure didn't, and I didn't know whether to smile politely, cry, or slap him in his face. Before I chose one of the three, he extended his arms for a hug, and I cordially obliged. As soon as our bodies came together in an embrace, which lasted all of three seconds, I was caught up. The feeling of his chest against mine was comfortable, alluring, and sexy. Instantly, I remembered him intimately and craved him. I had to catch my breath and pull away.
“What are you doing here?” I smiled out of both sincerity and confusion.
“Your birthday was set up as a reminder on my phone. I heard you were having a little get-together,” he said and glanced quickly around the room. “And I couldn't just let the day pass without acknowledging it.”
“Did you bring your fiancée?” My eyes darted around his body, then around the room. I didn't really expect him to have anyone with him.
He dropped his head in a chuckle, then looked up again. “No.”
“Does she know you're here?” With a slight swivel of my hand, my wine swirled around in my diva glass.
“I guess you could say that,” Russell said with a slow head nod.
“What do you mean?” As I was speaking, I remembered how sexy I looked in the stretchy black minidress I wore. I poked my chest out a little bit and casually placed my hand on my hip. “You only told her as much as you wanted her to know.”
He hesitated for a few seconds, then said, “She knows you and I are still friends.” I rolled my eyes at the word
friends.
“And she knows that I was dropping by a friend's party.”
“Uninvited,” I added, but that time my smile was cynical, as I remembered the parts of our involvement that I didn't like so much. And the fact that he was someone else's man now.
“Oh, is it like that?”
“I don't remember inviting you.” I shook my head quickly with a shrug. “Did you at least bring a gift? Oh yeah, I forgot. You don't do gifts.” Russell hadn't given me so much as an Easter egg, and it reminded me of one of the many reasons why I'd dismissed him from my life.
“I didn't realize a gift was required.”
Same old Russell.
I shook my head and started to walk off. He was getting my emotions stirred up, and not in a good way.
“Wait a minute, Candis,” he said, reaching out to grab my arm.
“Look. It's my birthday, and I want to enjoy it, unlike last year, when I waited all evening for you to come pick me up to take me out and you never showed. Do you remember that?”
“I'm sorry,” he said, twisting his lips.
“And now you are about to get married, and you show up here like you can just walk in and out of my life whenever you get good and ready, and I'm supposed to be just overjoyed about that, right? I mean, I'm supposed to be that desperate that I will settle for someone else's man because he comes crashing in on my birthday party and didn't even bring a damn gift.” It took everything within me to keep my composure and not let my body language communicate to the entire room the anger I felt. “If you really want me to have a happy birthday, Russell”—I paused and put on my sweetest smile—“get the hell out of here.”
Russell and all his fine-ness stared back at me, as if my words had made him a statue. The only thing that moved was his eyes, which studied mine for a hint of weakness. I didn't show an ounce.
“There's the door.” I nodded.
Shaking his head in what I assumed was defeat, he turned away and headed toward the exit, while I turned and headed for the bathroom, needing to pull myself together real quick. Leaning back against the sink, I cupped my hands around my mouth and nose and inhaled. I could still smell his signature cologne lingering on my skin from when he hugged me. Lord knows that man was looking and smelling some kinda good, and I wanted him some kinda bad. Even if it was just for old times' sake or for closure, or just because I hadn't had a good piece of ding-a-ling since he and I broke up. I mean, since I dumped him. We could have some one-last-time sex, and I could put something on him that would make him not want to marry Latrice and come running back to me. But then I wouldn't want him.
“Snap out of it, Candis. You sound like a fool,” I said to my reflection in response to my thinking. “You know he doesn't want you. He never did. Remember?” Then I answered myself back. “Yeah, I do. I remember. You're right.”
Turning the water on and pumping soap into my palms, I replaced Russell's scent with a cucumber-melon fragrance. I cupped my hands to my face again and sniffed, proud of myself, although the soap didn't smell nearly as good as he did.
“Did you see Russell?” Dina asked, practically attacking me once I came out of the bathroom.
“Russell who?” With my hand I dismissed the notion and walked off, but she stayed on my heels.
“Russell, your ex!” she exclaimed.
“So what? He's an ex, and he's engaged, or did you forget that?”
“Suppose they broke the engagement, though? I mean, he did show up here.”
“Yeah, and I'm wondering how he knew to do that.” I looked at her suspiciously while she picked up a piece of shrimp and stuffed it in her mouth. My hands flew to my waist, and I stared at her, demanding a response.
“It wasn't me.” Dina shook her head quickly but still looked as guilty as sin. Adding a shrug, she said, “I don't know how he knew.”
“Mmm-hmm,” I murmured in disbelief. “You and Celeste are trying to be slick. Where is she?” I let my eyes dart around the room, looking for the other suspected accomplice in Russell's sudden and unexpected appearance. She was giggling and smiling all in the face of the guy she'd invited out on the dance floor as they did the cha-cha slide. I slid on out there right beside her, fell into step, and semi-yelled over the music, “I need to talk to you when this song is over.”
“Okay.” She grinned while she dipped and turned. Before I could ease my way off the floor, the DJ started playing 50 Cent's “In Da Club.”
Everybody started shouting, “Go! Go! Go, Candis. It's your birthday! Go, Candis. It's your birthday,” prompting me to stay on the dance floor and shake my groove thang. We ended up forming a
Soul Train
dance line right after that, and I must have danced to about ten songs consecutively before I couldn't take any more. I didn't think about Russell again until the end of the party, when we were cleaning up and putting gifts in my car.
Most of the gifts I'd received, I'd opened as soon as they were handed to me, but I took a second look at everything, anyway. I was consolidating bags of shoes, purses, various gift cards, jewelry, envelopes stuffed with cash, and little knickknacks, when I saw a small glossy black bag that I didn't remember seeing before. There was a card in the bag and a small box wrapped with a silk white ribbon, which begged me to open it. When I did, I gasped like I was having an asthma attack.
“Look at these!” I called to Celeste and Dina, who were washing some dishes in the kitchen. I didn't give them a chance to come to where I was. I grabbed the box with the pair of one-carat diamond studs and rushed toward the kitchen. They both dried their hands long enough to peer over at the earrings like they were newborn twins.
“Where did they come from? Somebody had some money!” Celeste squealed.
I slid my finger through the glued seal of the card's envelope, pulled the card out, and skipped all the reading to look at who'd signed it.
You're a diamond. As brilliant as you are, I was just too blind to see it.
Hope this makes up for all the bad times,
Russell
Chapter 22
Candis
Texting was my first inclination to thank Russell for the earrings, but I didn't know if the future Mrs. Wayne checked his phone, or if it would trip him up any other kind of way, which was not my intention. With that in mind, I semi-reluctantly called his number, assuming that I'd find him at work since it was ten o'clock on a Monday morning. He answered after two rings.
“I called to thank you for the beautiful birthday gift.”
“You're welcome. I hope you like them.”
“I love them,” I gushed, touching my earlobes to make sure the earrings were still there.
“You deserve them. I should have gotten them for you a long time ago.”
“What made you get them for me now?”
“I don't know.” He paused for a couple of seconds.
“I knew your birthday was coming up, and I started thinking about how things ended between us, and I guess I just kinda wanted to make it up to you.”
“Make what up to me?”
“Make up the fact that I was too selfish to give you what you wanted and what you deserved.”
At a loss for words, I didn't respond, and silence fell between us for a few seconds.
“I messed up,” he admitted.
“I hear you're engaged now.”
“Yeah,” Russell sighed. “I wish it were you, though.”
That caught me off guard, but I quickly recovered. “You could have made it me, but that's not what you wanted.”
“I should have made it you,” he mumbled.
“But you didn't.”
“I tried to call you so many times, Candis, and you refused to take my calls. I need to see you,” he stated, and immediately I had mixed emotions.
“I don't think that would be a good idea, Russell.”
“Just for closure,” he threw in. “There're just a few things I want to tell you, and I'd rather it be face-to-face.”
“And what about Latrice? She's going to be fine with that?”
“You don't have to be concerned about that.”
It was against my better judgment, but I did have the man's earrings stuck in my ears. And it would be nice to see him again while I held the upper hand and wouldn't be on the begging end of the spectrum. Hell, maybe I would stand him up.
“I guess I could squeeze in about fifteen minutes or so tomorrow morning. My schedule is slammed,” I said.
“Fifteen minutes? I'll have to rush, but if that's all you can spare, I guess I'll have to make do.”
We solidified plans for him to drop by before work the next day and share whatever it was that was on his heart. My plan was to be grateful for the studs, but then to be cold and indifferent. I wanted to let him know that I was angry with him for rejecting me, then asking another woman to marry him. As much as I wanted to act like I didn't want to hear anything he had to say, I desperately wanted to know why I wasn't good enough for him. What made Latrice so much better than me.
He didn't deserve the effort, but I wanted to show him how good I looked and what he was missing out on. At the same time, I couldn't have him thinking I'd gotten dressed up for him, but I needed to look sexy, carefree, and in control. Which was why, after my shower, I decided against the dress and pulled on a pair of pink sweatshorts that barely covered my booty and a wife beater. My skin was slathered in cocoa butter, giving me a natural glistening glow, and my hair was pushed back from my forehead with a headband. A touch of mascara made my eyes pop but didn't make me look made up, and I smoothed cherry lip balm across my lips just in case our lips happened to meet.
I caught myself constantly peeking out the window in anticipation of his arrival. I hated that I did that, but I couldn't seem to stop myself. He pulled up right before seven, then called me from the parking lot.
“Hey, Candis. I'm outside.”
“Oh. I forgot you were coming. You'll have to excuse the way I'm dressed,” I lied.
“It's all good.”
“Just let yourself in,” I offered, taking a seat on the couch and pushing toe separators between my toes to make it look like I'd been busy pampering myself. A minute later, he twisted the knob and pushed the door open.
“Hey,” he greeted. His cologne swept across my nostrils as he entered, dressed in pair of loose-fitting jeans and a black graphic tee designed with a series of eagles' wings. He looked like a tall, cold glass of chocolate milk just waiting to be gulped down. Lord, have mercy, Russell was fine! If I wasn't trying to be in control, I would have thrown my arms around his neck, jumped up and circled his waist with my legs, and let him slam me against the front door and take me right there. My, my, my!
“Hey. Have a seat.” Russell hesitated until I pointed to the chair directly across from me.
“So how've you been?” he asked, leaning forward on his elbows and clasping his hands.
“Good.” I didn't look up at him but acted as if my toes were the most amazing things I'd seen in a long time.
“You look good.” I saw him nod in my peripheral.
“Thanks.”
“Those earrings look nice on you.”
“Yeah. I love them,” I commented with a smile, this time letting my eyes meet his while I touched my right earlobe. “Thank you again.”
“You're welcome.”
“So what is your future wife going to say when she finds out that you purchased some diamonds and they weren't for her?”
“I bought those earrings for you a long time ago, Candis,” he answered. “I just never had an opportunity to give them to you, because . . . well, I guess you'd made a decision that we were done or, I should say, you were done with me.”
“I had to draw the line somewhere, Russell. I wasn't willing to live my life hoping that one day you were going to come around.”
“I understand. I wasn't ready.”
“But now suddenly you are, and you're ready with someone else.” I smirked in sarcasm, shook my head, and added another coat of polish to my nails.
“Because you wouldn't have me. I know you don't believe this, but I've missed you, Candis. I've thought about you every single day.”
“So how is it that you can be engaged to another woman if your mind is stuck on me?”
Russell shrugged. “You'd walked out of my life, and she walked in. We started hanging out, and the next thing I know, she was planning a wedding.”
“And you just went along with it?”
“I guess you could say that.”
“So you never proposed to her?”
“I mean, I did, but we were kinda playing around, and she took it seriously. I didn't even have a ring. Hell, she bought her own.”
“She bought her own engagement ring?” I asked, gawking.
He nodded instead of verbally responding.
Sista girl was
that
desperate? “She didn't know you were playing?”
“I guess not, because she started telling her family and all that.”
“So she is bullying you into marrying her,” I said and laughed. “And you're letting her. That's definitely not the Russell I know.” Seemed like I did everything I knew how to do to get Russell to commit to a relationship with me, with no results, and come to find out all I had to do was just start planning a wedding. “And you're going to go through with it?” I asked when he didn't comment.
“I guess. The woman I really love has given up on me.”
“And what woman is that? You can't be talking about me, because you never loved me.”
“I've always loved you, Candis.”
“Yeah, right.” I guffawed as I remembered I had on booty shorts, stood to my feet, and stomped to the kitchen, with my toes pointed to the ceiling in an effort to not mess them up. “You want something to drink?”
“What do you have?” Russell stood and followed me but kept a respectable distance.
“Water, orange juice, grapefruit juice, coffee . . .”
“A little orange juice would be nice.”
I pulled two glasses from the cabinet, gave them a quick rinse, and filled them halfway with orange juice. Handing him a glass, I lifted mine slightly in a mock toast. “Here's to letting go of the past.” I leaned back against the counter, not taking my eyes off of Russell, trying to read his face. I thought I saw disappointment and defeat, and I loved it. With a slightly raised brow, I sipped from my glass.
“So it's good-bye for us, huh?” he asked, not having swallowed any juice yet.
“It was good-bye for us when I last said good-bye, Russell.”
“Don't make this the end for us, Candis. It doesn't have to be this way. I love you, and I know that you love me still.”
I brought my glass back up to my face to give me some time to think of how I wanted to respond. I did love Russell, but I wasn't about to admit that. And just because he wasn't really into Latrice didn't mean that he'd suddenly be interested in me. At the same time, he did call and text me every day for two months straight after our trip to Jamaica, but I ignored every single one of his voice mails and text messages. I wanted to believe him, but I couldn't.
“I think it's time for you to go.” I nodded.
Russell sighed. “Candis . . .”
“Russell, I'm done.” We stared at each other in an unspoken contest of who would look away first. It lasted fifteen seconds or more before Russell dropped his head.
“Baby, don't do this to us,” he whispered, sitting his glass down on the countertop and coming toward me.
Instead of backing up, I let him wrap his arms around my waist while he studied my eyes. A fire ignited on my flesh from the warmth of his hands and the gentleness of his touch. I shifted nervously in his arms, not trying to get away, but trying not to get any closer for fear that the spring on my goody box might suddenly give way and then it would be on! And since I hadn't quite forgotten about the ass whuppin' I took from Chad's wife a few years ago, I wasn't exactly trying to find out if Latrice would or would not fight over her man.
“There is no
us,
Russell. There never was.” I pushed against his chest as I stepped backward. “I'm sure your fiancée is looking for you.”
Without saying a word, Russell picked up his glass, gulped the liquid in its entirety, then turned on his heels and walked out the door, leaving me standing in the kitchen.
This time as I watched him walk to his car, I didn't feel less than. I felt empowered and strong. I felt in control and was proud of myself for not folding and not selling myself for the price of a pair of earrings.
 
 
“Expect a package tomorrow, baby.” That was the last thing SeanMichael said to me before we ended our Skype call the night before. Just as he'd said, a box arrived via FedEx shortly after Russell left. I sat down at my dining room table, scissors in hand, and cut through the packaging tape.
The first thing I opened was an envelope that held a card with a bouquet of roses on the front.
Dear BabyThang,
Though we've never met in person, I feel as if I know you well. I knew from the start that there was something beautiful and wonderful about you; you gripped my heart and wouldn't let go. Our relationship, though at a distance, has given me a lot of peace and comfort, and I have yet to see you. You make me feel almost complete, and I say “almost” only because the only thing missing is your presence. You magically entered my life and filled me with the love of a lifetime. Now, each day I look forward to seeing you–even if from afar–talking with you, and blowing you kisses. You are what I want. You are who I want. I feel so special knowing that you love me. I'm so elated that we're able to share our love with each other in such a pure way. It truly seems as if you're a part of me, as if our meeting was orchestrated by the heavens. The thought of you fills me with feelings I can't even describe.
Physically, we're miles apart, but you're not far away from me at all. You're in my heart every day, always on my mind. Even though we are separated by miles, we're not apart at all, because during the day, we see the same beautiful sunshine, and at night we gaze at the same stars. I don't care how long it takes me to get to you and what I have to do until I can be there, but until I do, I blow kisses to the wind and command them to travel the beautiful airways until they land gently on your face. Until I can kiss you in person, I will fix my eyes on your picture and pray for you every night, before I go to sleep. I can't wait for these lonely nights to be over, and for my arms to be filled with you.
I love you with my whole heart, and no one can ever make me feel the way that you do. I'll always put you first. I'll take care of you and treat you like the queen that you are. There is no one else for me. You are the woman of my dreams, the queen of my soul, and the love of my life. You're the one who's right for my life, and I want us to take this journey into the rest of our lives together. Nothing would make me happier than for you to allow me to take your hand in marriage, as your husband, and to love you for the rest of our lives.
Candis Lorraine Turner, my sweet BabyThang, will you marry me?
Anxiously awaiting your answer,
SeanMichael Monroe
Beneath the card was a large fluffy yellow robe with a wide black ribbon tied around it and a handwritten note that said “Untie this ribbon.” With a smile of expectation, I carefully untied the ribbon and unrolled the robe on the table. In the center was a red velvet box, which made my stomach tumble with butterflies.
“Here we go,” I said to myself. I held my breath as I lifted the lid to the hinged box to reveal my ring.
BOOK: Fool and Her Honey (9781622860791)
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