Forever In Love (2 page)

Emily had known Michael long enough to know when he had something on his mind, something he wanted to say to her. And the thought of what that might be sent butterflies tumbling around in her stomach.

The view from the top of the rise was spectacular. They could see all the way to the inlet, but their attention was drawn to the wedding below. All their friends and family were there, her sisters dancing with the men they loved while Grams was waltzing around the dance floor with another guest.

“Why did you bring me up here, Michael?”

He let his hand linger on her arm. “Because you’ve been running around all day, all week, all month, trying to take care of every last detail, and I wanted to make sure you took a moment to stop and see all this. I wanted you to see your family. To see how happy they all are. To see how well all your sisters turned out. Everything
is
perfect, Emily.”

“The wedding planner has done a really good job.”

His smile was warm, so warm that she swore she could feel the heat from it moving over her skin. “I know how much work you put into this wedding. How much heart and soul, too. Making something like this look effortless and relaxed takes a lot of work and planning. But I’m not just talking about the wedding. You’ve done a great job making sure everyone is happy and well-loved.” He took her hands in his and tugged her gently toward him so that she was looking directly in his eyes as he said, “And now it’s your turn.”

Michael had been in love with Emily his entire life. After all these years, he knew her different expressions—the way she lit up whenever her sisters had good news to share, the way she couldn’t stop frowning when she was worried about them, and how much genuine caring there was in her eyes every time she counseled a student at the high school or was helping out with one of the many island community projects.

Today, however, he couldn’t quite figure out what she was thinking as she said, “What do you mean, it’s my turn now?”

All the Walker sisters had the same blond hair, blue eyes and high cheekbones—the extraordinary good looks they’d inherited from their grandmother. Yet it had always been Emily Michael had been drawn to, with her effortless grace, her self-assured manner, her kind and caring nature...and her sexy girl-next-door appearance.

The strains from the string quartet drifted up to where they stood, and twilight was settling in over the scene. It did look magical, and it was not hard to see that the guests were having a great time.

But Michael only had eyes for Emily.

Always Emily.

He knew how much she had put into helping raise her sisters up and making sure things didn’t fall apart after their mother died. Which was why he’d forced himself to wait to have this moment with Emily until she could stop focusing on her sisters’ lives and finally think about her own.

“You did an amazing job bringing up your sisters,” Michael replied. “And when you aren’t working at the school, you’re always getting involved in local projects.”

“I like my job and working with the community. And I like looking after my sisters, too.” Her mouth quirked up slightly at the corner as she added, “Someone has to.”

He gestured to the scene below them, where her sisters were all dancing. “Like I said, you did great with your sisters, but they’re all more than capable of looking after themselves. They finally all have the lives they’ve always wanted. They’re with men they love.” He didn’t take his eyes off of her face as he said, “I know as well as anyone that you’ve been putting off your own happiness to make sure that everything works out for them. And now, maybe it’s time to think about what
you
want for once.”

She was frowning as she turned her beautiful blue eyes to him again, and just like always, he immediately got lost in them. “What are you saying, Michael?”

Maybe he should have been nervous. But how could he be nervous when Emily had always been the only woman in his heart? What’s more, he knew he couldn’t wait any longer. Even if she still seemed to want to try to avoid everything that had lain between them since they were kids, he had to get it out into the open. Just one glance down at the wedding told him that.

It wasn’t just that her sisters all had their own lives now. It wasn’t just that Emily had done everything she had said she was going to do to protect them and see them forth into the future. That made it sound as if her sisters had been a weight that had been holding Emily back, and that wasn’t true. Michael cared about all of them too much to think that way.

Most of all, today’s wedding proved just how well things could work out when people finally went after what they wanted. Brian was with Morgan because he hadn’t given up. Hanna was with Joel because she’d told him how she felt about him. Rachel had gone after Nicholas on a
Jet Ski
. Even Paige—shy, reserved Paige—had been prepared to say on national television what she felt for Christian.

If they could each do that, then surely Michael could say what he felt about Emily here and now. After all, it wasn’t as if he’d ever doubted what he felt. He’d just been waiting for the perfect moment.

And this felt like the closest they were ever going to get to that perfect moment. There was no better reminder of the importance of love than having all her sisters happy around her, and she finally—
finally—
had no responsibilities left to compromise her own happiness.

It had to be today.

It had to be
now.

“I love you.”

The three little words were out in a second, and in that second, Michael knew he’d been carrying his love for Emily around as a secret for far too long.

Her eyes went wide, and even though her gasp was soft, he heard it.

“I love you,” he said again. “I’ve loved you for years. And I think you care about me, too.”

“Of course I care about you,” she said. “But—” She faltered, as if she couldn’t find the right words. “But you lived with us so long that you’re practically family.”

“I’m
not
family,” Michael insisted. “I’m a man who loves you. A man who is standing here telling you that he wants to spend the rest of his life with you.” He gently cupped her cheek, stroking her soft skin with the pad of his thumb. “I
know
you feel the same way. We’ve both been dancing around this for so long.”

“You know I don’t dance,” Emily said, obviously trying to diffuse the situation with humor, the way she’d done so many times in the past whenever they’d come dangerously close to this moment.

She’d make a joke, or find something that urgently needed doing, or bring one of her sisters into the conversation. Anything to keep from acknowledging the truth. It was part of the reason he’d brought her up here in the first place. He’d not only wanted to take her away from those distractions, but he’d also wanted to show her that there wasn’t any reason to keep resorting to them.

He moved closer, drawing her against him. “I love you,” he said again, intending to keep saying it over and over until she finally believed him. “I love everything about you, even your two left feet.”

She was silent for a few seconds, and Michael held his breath. He knew he had to give her enough time to think through what she really felt, but he couldn’t help but pray she’d stop fighting her feelings for him, right here, right now.

“Michael.” He’d watched her work with enough students over the years to know when she was using her counselor voice. She was obviously trying to let him down gently as she said, “I know how easy it is to get swept up in a day like today. You’ve seen everyone else pairing up, so you think that since we’re the last two left we’re going to hook up. But it doesn’t work like that. We aren’t going to get a happy-ever-after by default.”

“No,” he agreed, “happy-ever-after happens when two people who care about one another finally admit it rather than continuing to steer clear of their attraction and love for each other the way they have for years.”

Was it so hard for her to believe that he could feel this way? Had she really not noticed all those times he’d found excuses to come around the Walker house? Yes, he’d lived there as a teenager, and yes, he’d been like a brother to her sisters, but it had never been like that for him with Emily.

“You’ve helped all your sisters to be that happy. Why not grab that happiness for yourself?”

He swore he saw something flash in her eyes—something that looked like the love he was hoping she’d return. Too quickly, however, she forced it away. Tried to force
him
away, too, as she slid out of his arms.

“It’s been a long day. An emotional day. But when you wake up tomorrow, you’re going to realize that you don’t love me, not really. You’re going to see that this was a mistake. And then we’ll both be glad that neither of us took this any further so that our friendship doesn’t have to suffer.”

Michael worked hard to push back his frustration as he said, “I’ll always be your friend, Emily. But no matter what I have to do, or how long it takes, I promise that I’m going to
prove
to you that I love you. And I’m also going to prove that you feel the same way about me.”

Emily let Michael lead her back down toward the noise and the excitement of the wedding, her heart pounding extra hard, even though they were headed downhill now.

It felt as if an electric charge was sparking between them as they walked back in the twilight. Michael had his hand on her arm, and she was hyperaware of everything about him. For just a moment, it was almost possible to let herself see that he wasn’t the teenage boy they’d taken in anymore, but a wonderful, handsome, amazing man walking beside her. If she’d met him in a bar…

Emily almost laughed out loud at that thought. When did she ever go to bars?

It was just that everything suddenly felt so topsy-turvy inside of her. Ever since that moment on the hill when Michael had said,
I love you.
Actually, before that—when he’d looked at her as if she was everything to him right after Morgan and Brian had said their vows.

But despite the fact that he’d repeated those same three little words of love again and again and again until her head—and heart—were spinning with them, she’d promised herself for ages that she would
never
go there. Allowing herself to fall for Michael would make things too complicated. Horribly complicated.

Because what if she and Michael weren’t able to make things work? It would ruin everything. Not just their friendship—the most important one she had—but also every family gathering, even just those days when he was working around the house fixing a leaky sink or when they were both volunteering for the same project in town.

Okay, so the truth was that when he’d been declaring himself to her, she’d felt elated for a few heady moments. Nearly bursting with a happiness that she almost couldn’t control.

But then, close on the heels of that elation, anxiety had hit. She’d felt exposed. Nervous. And scared that Michael had come close—way too close—to tearing down the walls she’d built up around herself so she could stay strong for everyone after their mother passed away.

Somehow, Emily knew she’d have to make Michael understand that they couldn’t risk everything. Especially not their friendship. But right in this moment, with everything inside of her still whirling like a tornado, she couldn’t find the words.

“Congratulations, Tres,” Michael said as they made their way through the crowd of dancers toward her father. “Morgan and Brian are a great couple.”

William Walker III looked the way he always did—slightly balding, his glasses perched on the end of his nose. Emily could easily imagine her mother straightening his bow tie, and it not quite lasting for more than a few minutes. Today, though her father looked happy, there was a note of sadness there, too. The same sadness she’d been feeling about her mother’s absence.

“Thank you,” her father said to Michael as his gaze moved to the happy couple. “They truly are meant to be.”

He turned back to look between her and Michael, and for a moment, she thought her father might be about to say that Emily and Michael were also meant to be. But when the band started up with a new song, her father said instead, “It’s been a long time since I’ve danced at a wedding.”

The note of sadness in his voice tore straight through Emily. So even though she was the Walker sister who
didn’t
dance, she found herself saying, “Would you like to dance with me, Dad?”

His look of surprise was followed by a great big smile. “I would
love
to dance with you, honey.”

She let her father lead her away from Michael—and, thankfully, her careening thoughts and emotions about him, as well—and into the middle of a big group of dancing wedding guests. Her father moved her easily into the first few steps as the band played in the background. Around them, Morgan was at the heart of it all in Brian’s arms, her long white dress swishing around her ankles. Hanna was sneakily trying to film the whole thing on her phone over Joel’s shoulder. Rachel and Nicholas were twirling a laughing Charlotte between them. And Paige and Christian were inadvertently stealing the limelight by being the best two dancers out there as they did what looked like an Argentine tango.

As Emily danced with her dad, she couldn’t help but wonder what it might be like to dance with someone else. Someone younger, someone muscular, but gentle. Someone who would look at her with piercing brown eyes.

Someone, Emily realized, who was a spot-on description of Michael Bennet. But she’d made up her mind to stay away from foolish thoughts like that, so she put even more effort toward forcing it out of her head than she had earlier.

“You dance beautifully, Emily,” her father said. “Just like your mother.”

“I think you have me confused with Paige,” Emily said with a laugh. “I’m the only one who didn’t get the Walker dancing DNA, remember?”

“Nonsense, you’ve always been a great dancer. Somehow you just always ended up on the sidelines bandaging all your sisters’ bruises from their overenthusiastic ballet jumps.”

Emily found herself relaxing a little as she finally settled in to enjoy this moment with her father. What had happened up there on the hill with Michael had been some sort of strange wedding-day aberration. This, however, was safe...apart from the possibility of treading on her father’s feet.

Emily remembered her father dancing with her mother. They’d always looked so happy together, whether swaying in each other’s arms or just being together at home.

“Are you enjoying the wedding, honey?”

Emily immediately thought of Michael, which sent her back into an internal tizzy, but she made herself smile at her father. “It’s turned out so beautifully, and Morgan and Brian seem really happy with everything.”

“The vows were lovely.”

When had they been reduced to this? To small talk about small stuff? Why did it so often feel like there were things they couldn’t say to each other? Why wasn’t she telling him about Michael? Asking him for advice? Or even just some reassurance that the complicated mess of feelings currently bubbling up inside her were actually not real and—

“Weddings always remind me so much of your mother,” her father said with a sigh.

All along, she’d known this was the answer to her questions, hadn’t she? He should have been more of a father to her and her sisters after their mother died. Only, he’d been so destroyed by his wife’s death that he hadn’t been able to be there for his daughters. They’d all been destroyed, but all of them had eventually learned to live again. All of them, except for her father.

“We can stop dancing if you like,” Emily offered.

Tres shook his head. “No. It’s better than standing around by myself thinking of how proud Ellen would have been to see her girls so happy and in love—and how I wish she could be here to see all of you for herself.”

Michael had said almost exactly the same thing to her, although he had said how proud
Emily
should be, rather than her mother.

“Do you really think Mom would have been proud of us?”

“Absolutely,” her father said as the band changed to another song and they moved straight into the next dance. “She would have been proud of all of you. Especially you, and the job you did looking after your sisters while I...”

While he’d fallen apart.

Emily could remember every single horrible moment of the day they’d been told that their mother had died. The crying faces of her little sisters, the way Grams’ beautiful face had crumpled so that she’d suddenly looked a decade older.

But mostly Emily could remember her father becoming a walking shell of himself. His grief had made him forget that he was a father and left him remembering only how much he was hurting.

“Is everything on track for the school trip to Italy?” Emily asked, hoping to distract him.

Her father’s bleak expression brightened a little. “It better be since we’re leaving tomorrow. I just need to make sure that we come back with the same number of students that we leave with. Which can be harder than you’d think when it comes to places like Venice. Are you sure you won’t come this time?” He often asked Emily that question when he was about to set off on one of his adventures.

Emily smiled, but shook her head. “I just don’t think I can get away—especially with such late notice.”

“Are you sure?” He didn’t usually push her, but today he said, “You don’t need to worry about your sisters. Grams is going off to do interviews on the mainland with Hanna and Joel, and the school is on spring break. I know it’s late notice, but you should really think about it. I could call the tour organizer right now. I’m certain he could open up a spot for you.”

“Thanks, Dad, but I’m looking after the farm while Morgan’s away on her honeymoon. Now that spring is here, a lot of visitors are coming over to the island, so I volunteered to lead a few homestead tours.”

“You couldn’t get someone else to do those tours?”

“Everyone else has plans.” She forced another smile. “I’m happy to do it.” Just as she’d always been happy to take care of her sisters while her father had been breaking down.

Stop it
, she firmly told herself as she deliberately loosened her grip on her father’s shoulders. This was not the time to be thinking about the past. She was at her sister’s wedding and should be filled with nothing but joy.

But, sometimes, these feelings and memories had a way of popping up when she least expected them. Her dad had barely been able to face life on the island after her mother’s death and had constantly been running off on trips abroad, leaving her and her sisters under the care of Grams. Even now, years later, he came around to Grams’ house only on special occasions, preferring, instead, to live in his own small apartment. He hadn’t abandoned them, exactly. When they’d been younger, he’d made sure they had everything they needed, and he’d taken care of all the bills. He was always so kind and gentle when he was with them, but the truth was that he had really missed out on watching them grow up.

For Emily, it had often felt as if she’d lost both parents.

“I know how hard it was for you looking after your sisters,” he said, obviously guessing what she was thinking. He stopped dancing and told her, “It is something I will regret for the rest of my life. I’m so sorry I put you in that position.”

Already topsy-turvy from Michael’s pronouncement of love on the hill, Emily was now even more stunned by her father’s apology. So stunned that it took several long moments for her to find her voice. “I understand why you had to stay away so much, Dad. At least, I think I do. It was hard on all of us. But, really, I didn’t mind looking after the girls…most of the time anyway. I’ve always been good at looking after them.”

He smiled. “Yes, you have.” They began dancing again. “You know, honey, the older you get, the more you remind me of your mother.”

“We all look like Mom,” Emily pointed out, because, after all, she and her sisters shared many of the same features.

“I don’t just mean physically. You have that same sense of calm grace. That same sense of control. Ellen was always the one who told me that things would work out, even right up to the end when she was so sick.”

Her father had said some difficult things to her today, and now Emily knew it was her turn to ask him some difficult questions. Ones she’d always wanted to ask. “What’s it like for you now? Does it still hurt just as badly, even after all this time?”

He was silent for a long moment, before finally saying, “I think some things will always hurt.” But then he put on a smile, the same one she had been trying to wear herself, as he said, “But today isn’t a day for talking about pain and sadness, is it?” Her father shot a look at Michael, who was standing over by the side of the dance floor watching them. “I’m wondering why he brought you over to me instead of dancing with you himself.”

For a moment, Emily thought about telling her father everything Michael had said.
I love you. I’ve loved you for years. And I think you care about me, too.
But she had always been the one other people went to, rather than the other way around.

Thankfully, before she had to try to answer her father’s question about why she wasn’t in Michael’s arms right now, the caterer rushed over to ask her a question, so her father escorted her off the dance floor. But even as she was telling the woman where to locate the extra box of tea lights, Emily was wondering—what would it be like to love someone that much? To love another person to the point where they became your entire world?

As far as Emily was concerned, the thought of loving someone to the point where losing them left a gaping hole that rendered you incapable of living your life and getting back to normal was a frightening thought. So frightening that she got shivers just thinking about ever risking herself like that—risking losing who she was and then being unable to deal with all the things everyone depended on her for.

Almost automatically, she glanced across at Michael.

No.
No way.
She could never allow herself to risk ending up like her father.

So deeply, so wholly in love, that she would never recover if she lost it.