Found by Love (20 page)

"There's a difference between being ‘mean’ as you say and protecting the ones that you love. Remember when you were protecting me last year at the New Year's Eve party? It's just what people do in circumstances like that. He's still your... What'd you call him? Your, TEDDY BEAR?! Haha-" She has such a loud laugh which gets me to laughing along with her. She's doing such a good job of distracting me from worrying.

"O! You know I love ya right?"

"Yes I do and I love you too! Am I helping at all? I know you're going crazy right now and I'm just trying to calm you down before you rip some heads off from some nurses."

Speaking of nurses... Grayson's surgical nurse walked in without me realizing it and was standing in front of me.

"Ms. Porter? The doctor wanted me to let you know that Grayson came through the surgery fine and is in recovery." Oh thank you God!!!

"Can I see him now? Has he asked for me?" She shook her head no and motioned for me to follow her.

"Not yet ma'am but he should be ready for visitors within the hour. We are still waiting for him to come out of the anesthesia. I'll come get you when he wakes up. He's going to be in a lot of pain when he wakes up but he'll have a morphine drip for the first few hours and you should be able to take him home by tomorrow evening." I shocked her and put my arms around her and gave her a big hug. I was so happy I couldn't contain myself.

"Thank you so much for letting me know. I'll be in here waiting for you to let me know when I can go see him." She nodded her head and smiled and patted my hand and walked down the corridor. I forgot that I still had the phone to my ear and jumped when Olivia said something.

"Well, that's a relief! I told you he would be fine Claudia. Do you feel a little better now?"

I heard the elevator ding and low and behold it happened to be the one that had Caleb and Cash in it. I cried tears of joy at seeing his beautiful face and ran into the elevator and jumped into his arms!

"I am now! Here's your husband!"

I threw Cash my phone and kissed Caleb hard on the lips which had him wincing. I pulled back and saw that his lip was split open and in my excitement I didn't notice it. He carried me into the waiting room and sat down on a couch with me on his lap.

"What happened baby? You didn't look like this when we said goodbye at the school. Who did this to you?" I started looking him over and he had a cut over one eye and what seemed to be the beginning of a black eye and a cut on his cheek.

"Honey I'm fine... How's Grayson? The last Cash heard he was in surgery. Is he out yet?" I look over at Cash and he's still on my phone talking to Olivia in the corner of the room. I turn around and put my forehead up to Caleb's and let out a big sigh.

"The nurse just left and said that the surgery went well and that he's in recovery and we should be able to see him within the hour." I look into his tired beautiful deep blue eyes and I know that he can tell what I'm thinking by just that one look. He let out a deep breath and started talking.

"Okay... Here's the deal. First off... I'm fine. A couple of cuts and bruises is all that I have. You really should see the other FIVE guys."

"What? There were FIVE of them? Who was it? Please don't tell me it was the police because the one I talked to seemed so nice."

"No Claud... It wasn't the police. It was the other guys that were with me in the same jail cell."

He leaned his head back against the wall and I leaned up and brushed his hair out of his eyes and started rubbing the side of his face. I feel so responsible for everything that's happened in the last few days. If it weren't for me he wouldn't have gone to jail in the first place.

"Stop it Cru..." He pulled my hands into his huge ones and held them tight and leaned up and looked at me and was grinning from ear to ear. "I know what you're doing... You're blaming yourself for all of this and I'm not going to let you. Do you hear me?"

I gasped... "How did you know I was thinking that? Don't you see? It IS all my fault. I should have just come out here by myself and you wouldn't have gotten mixed up in all of this mess." I pulled my hand out of his hands and got out of his lap and sat down further from him on the couch.

"Cru... When are you EVER going to quit thinking that the world revolves around every decision you make? Do you want to know why I got jumped by five guys?" I hatefully looked at him because that's not the first time that he's accused me of acting self-centered and it's starting to really piss me off! "Look at me. I'm six foot four and weigh around 250... Do you not ever watch movies? They always tell you that if you're ever arrested to pick a fight with the biggest guy in lockup. Well... I got to looking around for the biggest guy to put my bluff in with and I was the biggest guy in the cell... It just so happens that 5 other guys had the same idea as me. Trust me when I say that they look worse than I do. So... None of that had anything to do with you Cru." He scooted closer to me and I scooted further away from him and I can tell that he's starting to get upset.

"What's your problem? You greeted me with a hug and a kiss and now you're backing away from me."

"I don't deserve you so how about you go back home with Cash." My phone appeared out of nowhere and I realize that Cash is handing it back to me with a questioning look on his face.

"Why would he go home with me? Don't you think you kind of need him here? If he hadn't have been here for you and Grayson today it sounds like you could have gotten hurt as well. What's going on Claud?" Great! Now I have BOTH of them on my ass.

"Don't worry about it Cash. What's going on with you anyway? Are you cheating on Olivia?" Oh damn! Shit! Not only did I just talk about something that he's going to know Olivia and I discussed but the hurt look on his face let me know that I was way off on my assumption.

"Gee Cruella... Looks like you had your nails sharpened while I was in the slammer. Cash, let's go. She obviously wants to be alone because she's in attack mode and I'm too tired to deal with her shit tonight. Tell Grayson I'll see him in the morning." He stood up and started heading towards the doorway and my heart lurched at how quickly he could disconnect from me. I looked up at Cash and he looked absolutely crestfallen and sat down in one of the chairs in front of me.

"Is that what Olivia thinks? That I'm cheating on her? Do you think that too? Why would I? She's EVERYTHING to me! You might pull your scare tactics on Caleb and he runs from you like a little boy but I'm not scared of you Claud! Answer me! Why did you just ask me that dammit?!"

God I can be such an idiot sometimes. Why did I even say anything and ask him that? Just because I'm hurting doesn't give me the right to take it out on Cash because Caleb refused to play my little game of allowing me in pushing him away. Dammit!

"No... I don't think you're cheating on her and she casually mentioned it because you're never around when she needs you but she didn't sound serious so please don't mention that I asked you okay? She said something about how hard you've been working on some merger and how much she missed you and that she was going crazy with the kids is all. I'm sorry Cash. I took my bad mood out on you and it wasn't fair." I lean up and pat his hands and he grabs them and nods his head at me in thanks.

"I have been busy with the merger but I've also been staying at work to..... Sleep." I arched my eyebrows at him in shock. "I know... I know... I shouldn't do that to her but I can't ever get any sleep at home anymore with the babies up all night. That's the only secret I've been keeping from her. She and the kids are my world and it sounds like I've been taking all of them for granted. Oh man.... I feel so bad that she's so unhappy."

He starts rubbing his eyes and I can see the fatigue all over his face. I also noticed a few silver hairs at his temple that weren't there a few months ago but they seem to add more character and make him look even more attractive. I look over at Caleb who had finally sat down to let us talk and I realize that the only difference in the two brothers looks wise is their hair. Where Cash had jet black hair to just above his shoulders, Caleb has blonde wavy locks a little past the nape of his neck. Olivia and I definitely lucked out on getting us some hotties.

"Cash... Maybe you can take a few days off and spend them with Olivia and the kids. Better yet... Leave the kids with Elizabeth and Henry and take her somewhere one weekend. When was the last time you two got away from the kids?" He chuckled at my question and shook his head.

"I honestly can't remember but I bet if I ask her she will know. You women seem to have the memories of an elephant!" He stood up and pulled me up out of my seat and gave me a hug. "Thank you Claudia for opening my eyes. Your attack was terrible timing but definitely needed." He looked over at his brother and then back at me and whispered in my ear. "Take it easy on him because you have no idea how much he loves you. Don't push someone away when you need them the most. Love you little sis." He pulled away and grinned and kissed me on the forehead and walked over to Caleb.

I ran my finger through my hair and held back tears because I knew he was right but his comment also took me back to the only other person that called me his little sis and that was Derek. It felt good to finally have that title again but bittersweet as well.

"Caleb, I'm sorry but I won't be able to give you that ride to Mattie's. I'm heading to the airport to head back home because I need to see my wife and tell her how much she means to me. You might want to do the same thing little brother."

They both hugged and slapped each other on the back and Cash walked out and got onto the elevator leaving us both staring at each other thinking about Cash's words. If someone would have walked by they would have wondered who the two strangers were that seemed locked in place not moving towards each other but wanting to by their magnetic stare.

I feel like this is a test that I'm going to fail for the first time and the last thing that I want to do is make the first move to reconciliation but I know in my heart that if I don't I could possibly lose him. Silent tears start falling down my cheeks and I start walking to the one person that I know can dry them with just his warm embrace.

"I'm so sorry... I don't know what... I'm so sorry."

He picked me up when I couldn't say another word because I broke down sobbing and he carried me back to the couch and held me as tight as he could.

"Shhhh... Let it all out baby. I'm sorry too. I shouldn't have made you feel like I was walking out on you."

"But I tttold youu too. Youu diddn't ha have tttoo.... I wwaaasss bbeeing mmmean and I'm sssssooorrrryyy."

He pulled my head away from his chest to force me to look at him and I could see tears falling down his cheek which made me cry even harder. He started wiping my tears off of my cheeks and then softly kissed me.

"Cru...I love you and nothing is going to change that but please quit trying to push me away baby. You're killing me and I won't survive it if you end up breaking my heart. Let me love you baby. Let me love you the way that you deserve to be loved. Alright?" I nod my head and rest my head on his shoulder and hug him tighter and whisper in his ear.

"I love you, too Nerd Boy and please be patient with me."

He responded with a tight squeeze and I knew he was trying to compose himself like I was. The last thing we need to be doing when the nurse calls us back is to be bawling our eyes out and scaring Grayson more than he already is.

"Ahem... Ms. Porter? Grayson is ready to see you now and only relatives are allowed into his room." I turn around and she's giving Caleb the once over and I can tell that she's enjoying what she sees and I can't contain my jealousy as I stare her down which causes her to jump.

"That's great because this is his father. We are ready to see our son so please lead us to his room." I wipe my face off with a tissue and look up at Caleb and grab his hand as he winks at me and whispers.

"Calm down Rocky.... I'm all yours. There's no need for a jealous throw down with the nurse over little oh me." I leaned up and kissed him and bit his bottom lip which had him wince.

"That's right and you better remember that... You're MINE Nerd Boy!"

He laughed all the way to Grayson's room and we got plenty of stares by everyone but I didn't care. Everybody better remember that he's mine or they'll have hell to pay with me.

When we walked into Grayson's hospital room I stopped dead in my tracks half way in. Caleb was behind me and I used his body for support to lean on at the sight of my defenseless baby boy. I felt his breath at my neck.

"He's out of the woods baby... He's just resting. Don't let him see how scared and worried you are. Put your brave face on for our boy alright? You can fall apart later when we're alone."

He always seems to know what to say to me. I nod my head and grab his hand to hold on to it for strength while we waited for Grayson to wake up. I sit down to the right of him so that I can hold his hand because his left arm has a cast that goes up past his elbow that's being held in a sling. There is a new bandage on the back of his head from the 5 stitches he received in the emergency room from the cut on the back of his head and a couple of bruises on his face from his fight with his cousin.

He looks so tiny in the bed and so defenseless that it takes everything I have to not start crying again. I start caressing his hand and lean up to kiss the top of his hand and I hear the most beautiful sound that I've ever heard.