Four Play (32 page)

“You had no key.” But Tucker did. She sent him a questioning stare.

He shrugged. “We were worried, Kels. When you left your parents’ house. I had no way of knowing if you were okay.”

She sighed. It was true. For all they knew, she could have been in a car accident. God knew her driving as she’d fled Austin to her little two-bit hideaway hadn’t been great. Hard to see through a downpour of both rain and tears.

If she was going to be mad at anyone, it was herself.

“Thank you all for caring.” Slowly, she sat at the kitchen table. The headache from her hangover tried to reassert itself.

When she rubbed at her head, Rhys grabbed a bottle of water and handed it to her. Tucker followed with two ibuprofen and a frown.

“You have that look like you’ve been drinking wine,” Tucker muttered. “It always hurts you.”

Bless him for knowing and caring. God knew she didn’t deserve it after the way she’d behaved.

Before she could say anything, Jeremy slid behind her and rubbed his talented hands up the tense muscles of her neck and shoulders. She groaned.

“Those little noises are giving me a hard-on, sweetheart,” he whispered.

She noticed that Rhys and Tucker had edged closer, too. And she was sitting in the corner with no escape route. The testosterone overload was about to bowl her over.

“Sit,” she barked at them. And didn’t say a word until they’d all complied.

Jeremy was the last to do so—no surprise since he was used to giving the orders. But finally they all sat around her little round table, so close she could reach out and touch any of them. So far away she felt as if she’d never touch them again.

“I can only say this once.” Damn it, her voice was already beginning to shake. She drew in a fortifying breath. “I love all of you. Rhys, your teasing and helping hands with anything that breaks in this house got my attention. You about killed me with the physical fitness kick, but I feel so much better now. You cared enough to keep badgering me. I love our movie nights and the way you make me look forward to every day. You’ve really taught me the true meaning of turning negatives into positives.”

“I love you too, baby. I just want to marry—”

“Let me finish.” She turned her gaze to Jeremy . . . and melted under the flare of those blazing dark eyes. “You were lust at first sight for me.”

“Same here.”

Kelsey had known that, but acknowledged him with a nod. “I assumed, though, that I’d be working for a demanding womanizer and it would be easy to fall out of lust. I got the demanding part right. But you were also surprisingly patient, teaching me more than I would have ever learned about the law otherwise. You praised me when I got it right, pushed me harder when I didn’t. Somehow, over the years, you made me embrace myself and my curves. I gained confidence and loved sparring mentally with you. I’m richer for knowing you.”

Jeremy stood. “Goddammit, that sounds like a good-bye speech. You can’t just leave. I’ve never allowed myself to love anyone until you.”

And the fact he’d admitted that in front of Rhys and Tucker told Kelsey exactly how serious he was. Her stomach clenched again, and she fought off fresh tears.

She took another deep breath, then turned to Tucker. “I could never describe all that you mean to me. The quickest way to tell you how much I value you is to say that I’ve known all my life that if I fell, you’d catch me. No hesitation. No questions asked. You know me all the way down to my soul and still like what you see. That’s worth more than anything in this world.”

Tucker tensed. “Kels, don’t go. We can work this out.”

“We can’t,” she argued, then dissolved into a sob. “I’ve wronged all of you. And still, you want me to choose among you. I can’t do it. All of you mean the world to me. If I tried to choose one, I—”

God, how could she confess her worst nightmare—and her greatest fantasy?

“You’re saying you couldn’t be faithful?” Jeremy quirked a dark brow, seething just under his unreadable façade.

“I’m saying I can’t give up two of you in favor of one. It’s unfair to all of us. If I committed to one of you, you’d always wonder about my feelings for the others. You’re all stubborn, so I know the two I didn’t choose would have a difficult time moving on.”

“I’d respect your decision,” Tucker vowed.

But he looked like the words alone cost him so much pain. To stand by if she married Rhys or Jeremy . . . no, it would destroy a lifetime of friendship now that they’d become so much more to each other.

“I don’t want to put you in that position. Or me. I’m weak where you’re all concerned.”

“Fuck!” Rhys yelled. “That’s so damn unfair, Kelsey. I made love to you first. That’s got to mean something.”

“It means you were first to catch me at a moment too vulnerable to say no. Since I first started fantasizing about you all, I feared it was only a matter of time before I couldn’t say no anymore. And I was right.” She sniffled. “So, on the way home today, I called a real estate agent, who’s coming later to talk about the possibility of listing my house. I’m flying to Miami to talk to Garrison tomorrow.”

“No!” Rhys and Tucker shouted.

“Goddamn, Garrison!” Jeremy snarled.

The job was hers if she wanted it. For as long as Jeremy’s rival had been trying to lure her away to work for him, they all knew that.

“Kelsey, just leaving us makes no fucking sense,” her boss argued. “You’re going to make us all miserable instead of making one bastard happy?”

“Don’t you get it? You’d
all
be miserable. If I married you, would you let me be alone with Tucker again for five minutes? Ever?”

She saw the answer in his face. He wouldn’t allow such a thing in a billion years.

“See.” She stood. “You’d have a difficult time trusting me—not that I don’t deserve it. And being forced to cut the other two out of my heart to pacify a jealous husband would eventually change who
I
am and crush the marriage.”

“I’d never make you choose,” Tucker said.

“Then it would be your mistake,” she spit out in brutal honesty. She turned to Rhys and Jeremy. “Correct me if I’m wrong, but neither of you will give up easily or soon, even if I married Tucker, right?”

“I’d have to take my last breath in order to give up.” Jeremy crossed his arms over his chest, his challenging gaze spearing Tucker.

God, he looked ready to fight, here and now.

“I’d never back down,” Rhys promised. “You may see me as your laid-back neighbor with the big sense of humor. But about you, I’m deadly serious.”

“Which only proves my point. I
knew
better than to give in to my cravings for any of you . . .” She buried her face in her hands. “I feared you’d be hurt. I knew I’d be confused. I don’t see a way out of it except to leave.”

Tucker grabbed her hand. “Kels, no—”

“Don’t do this!” Anguish thundered across Jeremy’s face.

Rhys, the closest, grabbed her face and planted a hard kiss on her mouth. “I’m not letting go without a fight.”

Kelsey had known this scene would be difficult, painful. Even she hadn’t been able to foresee that turning them all away and ending everything between them would shred her guts and heart. Their expressions said she was doing the same to them. She slapped a hand over her mouth, watching them with a watery gaze.

The doorbell rang, cutting through the tense despair in the little kitchen.

“The real estate agent?” Jeremy snapped.

Likely so. She nodded.

Her only consolation was that she was ending their relationships now. If she stayed and tried to choose one or go back to the way life had been . . . No. There were too many feelings out in the open now. She knew how they felt inside her, about her. Going back was impossible.

Before they could stop her, she darted past them and into the foyer, wiping away her tears. After brief introductions and a short tour of the formal living and dining rooms, she returned to the kitchen nook with the sharply dressed woman. By then, the guys had cleaned up the pizza box and beer cans, stashed the trash can, and folded their blankets. Their eyes were grim. Rhys clenched his fists. Jeremy ground his jaw. Tucker’s cajoling speech was on the tip of his tongue—and all over his face.

Kelsey introduced them to the agent. The fifty-something woman looked confused by their presence, and the resulting silence quickly became awkward.

“Can you guys excuse us? I need to show Barbara the house.”

Another long pause, and Kelsey wondered if they were going to argue with her, despite the agent’s presence. Finally, Rhys gave her a sharp nod and stormed out of the room.

“Call me, honey.” Tucker’s voice was a plea. “Please.”

And where would a phone call lead except deeper under his spell?

Jeremy saved her from answering. “This discussion isn’t over.”

It was, and that fact was killing her. Jeremy knew it was over, too. He just didn’t concede defeat easily. That was one of the reasons he was so successful.

“Good-bye.”

Kelsey wanted to sink into the couch and wail out her heartbreak, but Tucker would use it to draw her into his arms, and Jeremy would find some way to use her weakness to his advantage. She didn’t dare succumb to tears now.

“Let’s see the backyard, Barbara.”

The agent nodded, clearly glad to be away from the men. Together, they went outside. When Kelsey returned with the other woman a few minutes later, the guys were gone.

With a crushing sense of sadness, she wondered if she’d ever see them again. If she was smart and wanted to keep from breaking everyone’s hearts, the answer must be no.

CHAPTER
|
SIX

By some unspoken agreement, all three men found themselves in
Rhys’s house. Probably so they could stare out the window and see when the real estate agent got in her Lexus and left. And they could all storm back over to Kelsey’s house.

Jeremy wasn’t, for one minute, ready to let this go. As the beers and scotch dwindled over the next two hours, Rhys and Tucker also made it clear they didn’t subscribe to the if-you-love-something-set-it-free theory.

He slammed his bottle on Rhys’s table. “Both of you knew I wanted her. I made that perfectly clear.”

Rhys snorted. “You may be used to people giving you what you want in legal negotiations, but she is a woman. I wanted her every bit as much as you. More, even.”

“That’s not possible,” Jeremy assured. After nearly twenty-five years of sexual activity, he could say without a doubt that he wanted Kelsey with an enduring intensity that he’d never felt.

“I’ve known her my whole life,” Tucker groused. “I always hoped that our long-standing relationship would count for something . . .”

Silence descended, and they all downed more alcohol. Diluting it with dinner would probably be a good idea, but it might also temper this angry buzz he had going, and right now, Jeremy wanted to feel how badly he’d fucked up. Miscalculated. He did his best thinking when he was furious.

Rhys stood and paced. “Damn, I have to report for duty in six hours, which means I have to stop drinking.”

But the fireman eyed his beer as if sobering up were the last thing he wanted to do.

“To do that,” he continued, “I need to find some clarity. Let’s look at the facts.”

“Fact one: She let each of us fuck her,” Jeremy said brutally. “You on Monday, me on Wednesday, and Tucker on Friday.”

“She didn’t do it to be malicious,” Tucker argued. “But because she says she loves all of us.”

Jeremy sighed. “That’s fact number two.”

“Maybe . . . we’re making this about sex, and it isn’t,” Tucker suggested. “Maybe it’s just about her heart. She’s being honest when she says she loves us all, and we’re arguing about who’s sleeping with her.”

“Of course she’s being honest. But where the hell does acknowledging that leave us?” Jeremy scowled. “There’s three of us and one of her. What the fuck are we supposed to do?”

Tucker raked a frustrated hand through his fashionably shaggy hair. “We’re tearing her apart.”

“No shit.” Jeremy knew the sarcasm wasn’t helping, but seriously, did Tucker think he hadn’t realized that?

Suddenly, Rhys froze. “I got it.”

“Got what?” he and Tucker both snapped.

Rhys rolled his eyes. “The solution! We
share
her.”

The words went off like a bomb. After the explosion, eerie silence reigned for a full dozen seconds.

Then Tucker pushed back in his chair. “Pass her around like a lap dog?”

“Let her leave my bed to crawl into yours?”

“Look, do you want her to move away?” Rhys demanded.

Jeremy tried not to grind his teeth. “No.”

“Of course not,” Tucker muttered.

“Then get over your own fucking egos.” The fireman started pacing again. “She says she can’t choose. So we don’t make her . . . at least right now. Maybe she just needs more time with each of us to make a more educated decision, so for now, we share her. Take all the pressure off.”

Tucker’s fist tightened around his beer can. “How would that work?”

Rhys blew out a breath, clearly clueless about the practicalities. The fireman was big on ideas but short on details. “I think we have to let her choose who, when, where ...” He sent a pointed glance in Jeremy’s direction. “Give her all the power.”

Jeremy tensed. That went against every instinct he possessed as a Dominant and a man. But as Rhys had so ineloquently pointed out, this wasn’t about his ego, and Kelsey would leave them permanently if they continued to press her before she was ready to make a decision. She had to relax and really experience him as a man, a friend, a life partner, before she could commit.

“I don’t like it,” Tucker crushed the aluminum can in his grip. “But it makes a perverse sort of sense. We’ve all taken our relationships with her from platonic to intimate in the span of a few days. I asked her to marry me—”