Fractured (33 page)

‘She’s given me a bottle of this every Christmas since she was thirteen years old,’ the man explained to the nurse, whose professional composure was beginning to crumble at his words. ‘It was like our private little joke…’ His voice tailed off.

I don’t remember the ceremony. I’m sure it was beautiful. I vaguely heard the hymns, and I guess I must have said my
I do
’s in the right place, but really it was all lost to me in a wonderful dream-like haze. All I could really remember was the look in Jimmy’s eyes as he slid the narrow golden band on my finger and gently lifted the veil from my face. A small cheer came from the pews behind us as he claimed my mouth in a tender kiss.

‘Have you said your goodbyes?’ asked the doctor kindly.

The man nodded, speech beyond him.

‘Is there anyone here with you?’ Dr Whittaker asked in concern, worried not for the patient, for whom he could do nothing, but for her father.

‘No, there’s no one,’ the man said at last. ‘It’s just the two of us. She’s all I have in the world.’

From behind the doctors, the nurse silently began to cry.

Dr Whittaker stepped over to the unit which was breathing for Rachel. Which had been doing so every day since she had been brought into hospital some two months earlier.

‘See you soon, my darling girl,’ the man whispered in his daughter’s ear, as the doctor behind him flicked the switch.

‘It will take a moment,’ he said quietly.

The father took hold of his child’s hand and squeezed hard to let her know he was with her.

We turned to walk back down the aisle. Joined together at last. Together for ever. As we passed the end of the pew where my father was sitting he reached out and grasped my hand, squeezing it hard. I looked at him and smiled. I held onto his hand even as we began to walk away, maintaining the contact until only our fingertips were left touching.

‘She’s gone,’ the doctor said quietly into the man’s ear, as the machine behind them confirmed his diagnosis with a long, lamenting, continuous tone.

A long and continuous note sounded from the church organ behind us, before tumbling into the lilting strains of one of my favourite love songs.

As we approached the entrance, the ushers flung open the doors. Unusually bright February sunshine sliced through the doorway, dazzling us with its intensity after the cool darkness of the church.

Jimmy and I exchanged a deep and meaningful look before walking together into the light.

When we first meet Rachel, she has cut herself off from her family and friends. Do you think she is ‘punishing’ herself for Jimmy’s death?

Why do you think Rachel feels so responsible for the outcome of the restaurant accident? Do you think she would feel differently if Matt had died in Jimmy’s place?

When Rachel refuses to be her bridesmaid, Sarah asks her to reconsider. Rachel ‘answers her’ by showing her scar. Are there other places in the story where her scar plays a role? How do you think Rachel really feels about it?

The novel begins with an accident. To what extent is Rachel’s future shaped by events outside her control?

Did you guess what would happen at the end of the novel? Did you finish the book feeling uplifted or sad?

The story moves backwards and forwards in time. How does that affect what you feel about Rachel?

Would you feel differently about Rachel if the book began as she woke up in hospital?

By the end of the novel, do you feel any sympathy for Matt? What about Cathy?

Which of Rachel’s relationships do you think is most important to her – Jimmy, Matt, Sarah or her father?

The characters encounter mirrors and reflections at several points during the story. Do you think the idea of mirror images relates to the way the author organises the story?

There are many people I would like to thank for making a dream I have had for a very long time, come true.

Firstly, I owe a huge debt of thanks to my incredible agent Kate Burke from Diane Banks Associates. Thank you Kate for loving
Fractured
the way you do; for finding me and taking me on the first steps of an exciting journey into a whole new world. Thanks also to Diane and Olivia for the very warm welcome and for all your help and support, I really appreciate it.

I would also like to thank my fantastic editor Laura Palmer at Head of Zeus, for her guidance, wisdom and patience, and for never making me feel that I was asking stupid questions (even when I know I was!). Thanks also to the amazing team at HoZ, whose warmth, friendliness and professionalism know no bounds.

When writing
Fractured
, I took the names of friends and colleagues and used them in a hybrid mash-up for my characters. Many of you didn’t even know I was doing this, so apologies if finding a version of your name left you feeling a little surprised. Thank you for lending them to me, you are: Jimi Randall, Rachel Boyd, Matt Cooper, Cathy Johnson, Louise Boyd, Janet Boyd, John Kendall, Phil Wiltsher, Trev Chengabroyen, Jessica Sacco, Scott Tulloch, Dave Kelly, Sam Corcoran, Emily Frost, Laura Winter, Jamie Hunt, Max Isham, Joe Thorpe, Debbie Keyworth, Sheila Ellis, Kim Webb, Dee Whittock, Janet Brady, Ann MacRae, Megan Freeman and last, but not least, Kizzy the cat.

There are few things more important in life than really good friends, and for no other reason than that I would like to thank Hazel for always being there for me (even if, unfortunately, ‘there’ now happens to be in Australia).

Lastly I would like to thank my wonderful family for simply being the three best people in the entire universe. Ralph, Kimberley and Luke, I could not have done any of this without you.

And finally for my mum, Riv. I really wish you had been here to see all this happen for me, but I hope news of it has managed to reach you, wherever you are.

The night of the accident changed everything...

Now, five years on, Rachel’s life is crumbling.

She lives alone in a tiny flat, working in a dead-end

job, desperate with guilt over her best friend’s death.

She would give anything to turn back the clock.

But life doesn’t work like that... Does it?

~

The night of the accident was a lucky escape...

Now, five years on, Rachel’s life is perfect.

She has a wonderful fiancé, loving family and friends

around her, and the career she always wanted.

But why can’t Rachel shake the memory
of a very different life?

Can two different stories lead to
the same happy ending?
Or will Rachel stay
fractured
forever?

DANI ATKINS lives with her family in a small village in Herfordshire with two elderly cats and one very excitable border collie.
Fractured
is her first novel. Dani is currently working on her second novel, due to be published in 2014.

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