From the Ashes (Force of Nature Book 1) (23 page)

But what, I wondered, would separate the creatures of that darkness and me? What, if anything, could keep them away? Those once sworn to protect me had become the very creatures hunting me, and they were not alone in that endeavor--Monroe's presence in the club was proof of that. I could not depend on others to keep me alive. Not anymore. The illusion of safety that had lulled me so sweetly was a dangerous mirage that, if I let it, would lead only to death. I would then bring that death upon the pack trying to protect me from it, and I couldn't accept that fate. I needed to change it.

As my mind drifted off to the sweet place between wakefulness and slumber, it became clear what I needed to do.

* * *

I saw Merc that night.

Unlike all the nights previous, this time it was not a repeat of the attack and my subsequent escape—the brothers holding Merc back like the wild animal he'd become. The crazed killer he was notorious for being. Instead, it had morphed somehow. Jase and Dean were both there restraining him, but he was not at the staircase as expected. This time he was in his bed, the two of them pinning him down as he bucked wildly against them.

“We'll find her,” Jase ground out, working hard to subdue him.

Merc shot him a murderous look but said nothing. Nothing I could hear.

“Then I guess we need to get to her first,” Dean said as calmly as he could while straining to hold Merc's legs down.

“Don't worry. She'll believe us. She trusts us,” Jase added, his tone placating. Merc relaxed back into the bed, if only slightly. “You'll see her again soon.”

* * *

I startled awake, my mind sorting through what I'd just seen and heard. It was a dream, I knew that in my head, but in my heart it felt so real. So true. My paranoia was ramping up with the recent events in Anchorage.

I wondered when it would finally push reason aside and completely take over.

Taking a breath to calm myself, I let my gaze drift over to Knox, who still looked as tense as he had when we’d first sped away from the club. His white-knuckle grip on the wheel hadn't changed.

“We're almost home,” he said, staring out at the rising sun. Then he fell silent again.

After a moment or two, I straightened myself up in my seat and smoothed out my clothes.

“I have to thank you for—”

“Don't thank me yet. We're not sure we're in the clear.”

I winced at the reality in his words.

“Well, I likely wouldn't be alive at the moment if it weren't for your help, so just in case we aren't in the clear, I want to thank you for getting me this far.”

I saw the slightest curl form at the corner of his mouth.

“You really can circumvent the rules, can't you, Piper?”

A small smile tugged at my lips as well.

“When you're not powerful or strong, you learn to adapt other qualities that are useful in our world.”

“How do you know you're not powerful?” he asked earnestly.

I deflated back into the car seat.

“Because I wouldn't be running if I was...”

“Maybe you just haven't figured out how to work your magic yet. That happens sometimes, you know? Powers don't always come right away. Sometimes they show up when you need them most.”

I thought about how I’d narrowly survived Merc's attack on me at the mansion. How I wouldn't likely have lived if it weren't for reaching the outdoors. I’d definitely needed my magic then, and it had come. Nature and I were connected somehow, as was the case with most magical beings, but for me, it seemed as though she gave to me as she saw fit. That I couldn't call power from her at will. That hardly made me a force to be reckoned with. I sounded like someone who could barely scrape by, magically speaking.

“Oh, they come to me when I need them most,” I countered, bitterness in my tone. “And then they bugger off, leaving me to be a defenseless twit. I hate it. I hate being this way.”

“Then change,” he said. “Learn. Train. Not all supernaturals wake up one day with unlimited powers. Some have to work to achieve what they have; your warlock buddies are no exception to that rule.”

“And who will train me, hmm? The fey that laughed in my face when I was a child, their own king and queen casting me out? The witches? No, I don't think so. Those bitches are evil, despite their best efforts to appear good. And I think we've established why I haven't turned to the warlocks for help.”

His jaw tensed as he listened to me, my anger fueling his own.

“So you've been on your own since childhood? You've been running that long?” he asked as we pulled into the long, winding driveway of his property.

“No. Not exactly.”

“Where were you before you came here?”

“Seattle.”

“Half truth,” he observed, shooting me a disapproving glance.

“Fine. New York. I originally came from New York City.”

“Better.” He parked the SUV by the house and I jumped out, wanting to run into the house without further interrogation. Knox, on the other hand, had something else in mind. He caught my arm as I rounded the vehicle, holding me in place. He stared at me for a moment before letting me go. I stormed up the front steps and into the lodge, running to the bathroom to hole up for a while. It was the only place I could be alone other than my cabin.

And I had no plans to head back there right away. I was way too spooked.

Knox was kind enough to leave me alone, but I knew I couldn't stay in there forever. Eventually I emerged from the bathroom to find him in the kitchen, making some very early morning breakfast. I walked past the island toward the living room and the biggest sofa it boasted, inelegantly plopping myself down on it. I propped my elbows on my knees and dropped my head into my hands. I needed to think. I needed a plan.

The unmistakable sound of a chair dragging on hardwood pulled me from my thoughts, and I looked up to see Knox sitting directly in front of me, mimicking my posture. There was a weariness to his expression that looked wrong on him. I didn't like seeing it.

“Piper,” he said with an exhausted sigh, “I really think now might be a good time for you to tell me about your past. If not for you, then for my boys. I need to know what we might be up against. A warlock here and there is nothing to stress over, but if it's something else—something bigger than that—I really need to know. The sooner the better.” He reached across the narrow divide between us and took my hand in his. “You can trust me. You can trust all of us.”

“That word,” I muttered to myself. “I can't. I'm so sorry, but I can't.”

His eyes saddened.

“Who betrayed you, Piper? Who turned you into this scared shell of a being?”

“No one,” I replied, pulling my hand away from him. “This is just me, take it or leave it.”

“Lie,” he said sharply before softening his tone. Then he took my hand again and wouldn't let it go. “And I'm not leaving it. You need to eat something. The boys should be back soon—once they’re done dealing with the warlock. Let's enjoy the quiet while we still have it.”

I nodded tightly, wrapping my free arm around my waist. Around my scars. They were my armor—my reminder. I'd dropped my guard over my time with the vampires, taking down the protective walls I'd erected over the years, and it had nearly gotten me killed. I couldn't afford to get too close to Knox and his pack. I wouldn't survive another betrayal.

“I think I'm going to head to the cabin,” I said weakly, trying unsuccessfully to free my hand from his hold.

“You do that a lot,” he said, eyeing the arm wound around my midsection. “It's like it's your tell.”

“I'm just tired. It's been a crazy night.”

“You just slept for five hours.”

“And yet I'm still tired. Sue me.”

His eyes narrowed.

“You're pushing me away,” he said shrewdly. “I want to know why.” He let go of my hand.

“I'll see you tomorrow,” I replied absentmindedly, turning to walk to the front door. I'd almost made it there, but the low growling sound coming from behind me cut me short.

“
Lie
.”

Shit.

“You're paranoid, Knox. Go eat. Sleep. It might do you some good.”

With a steadying breath, I continued through the foyer to the double entry doors. Knox made no move to stop me. I turned the handle and pulled my way to near freedom.

“They'll find you eventually, Piper. It would be better if you aren't alone when they do,” he said, a certain sadness tainting his words.

“You're wrong.” I weakly tossed the words over my shoulder. Even I knew they weren't true. But Knox was wrong about one thing; it would be better if I were alone when I was found.

He had no clue what was really hunting me.

16

To my surprise, Knox didn't follow me. I'd expected him to come storming out of the lodge, telling me that I was acting foolish and that I had a death wish. Instead, he let the quiet sounds of nature alone escort me back to my cabin. Unfortunately for me, they were drowned out by the voices in my head telling me that he was right.

I pushed my way through the dense forest that separated our two properties, all the while trying to convince myself that running was best. But with every step I took, I became less certain of that. I
was
weak. I
did
need others to protect me.

And I hated myself for it.

The sun was beaming on the front porch of the cabin, welcoming me home. I perched myself on the second step and stared at the beauty surrounding me, wondering what it would be like to actually get to stay in such a glorious place. A place I felt so grounded by and connected to. The sensation had been missing in New York, with very rare exceptions. The woods around the mansion felt like home, even though they shouldn't have. I was a city girl to the core, or so I thought. But nature was about to teach me otherwise.

I soon realized I was not alone.

Whipping around on the step, I saw a furry face peeking at me from around the corner of the house. A bear. Another fucking bear. It was exactly what I didn't need.

Once I spotted him, he came out from his hiding spot, slowly ambling around the porch toward me. I could feel my anxiety rising, but I didn't move. Not because I was paralyzed by fear, but because I knew him. It was the bear that had startled me by the waterfall. I don't know how I knew it, but I did.

And he seemed to know me too.

He eyed me with acknowledgment, stopping just feet short of me. Then, awkwardly, he sat down, which made him look ridiculous. It was such a human gesture that I actually giggled out loud, my nerves getting the best of me. He snorted loudly then stood up again.

“I'm sorry. I didn't mean to laugh,” I said aloud. He cocked his head at a funny angle, as if he were contemplating my apology, then sat down again. My heart skipped a beat. He understood me.

Now, in all my time spent immersed in the supernatural, I'd never once heard of a werebear, so I knew that wasn't the case. No, this was a regular old bear sitting before me, looking like he was trying to have a conversation. It was beyond strange. Thoughts and questions raced through my mind so quickly that I couldn't seem to grab hold of anything concrete. Unable to think clearly, my instincts took over.

Those instincts drove me to my feet and led me over to the bear without caution. By the time my rational thought caught up, I was running my hands through his thick fur. The rumble of his chest beneath my hand made me jerk away from him, falling backward with a yelp. Within seconds, the grizzly was towering over me.

“Step away, please,” I said, mustering every ounce of calm I could.

He backed up enough to let me up.

I scrambled to stand up but never got the chance. The crunching sound of brush breaking behind me drew the bear's attention. I looked back, wondering if Monroe had indeed found me. I wasn't sure that my bear buddy and I were going to be much of a match for him. Luckily, it wasn't the warlock that came crashing through the tree line.

Knox stood there, breathing hard, his naked chest cut and bleeding, though healing right before my eyes. The predatory growl that escaped him shook the ground I was still sprawled out across. Judging by the way my new grizzly friend pawed and stomped at the earth, he wasn't a fan of the werewolf. Grizz quickly moved to hover over me.

To him, Knox was the threat.

“Shit,” I muttered as I tried to wiggle out from under the massive bear without getting accidentally stomped in the process. “Knox!” I yelled, the bear's mass muting my voice a little. “Don't charge him. He's not hurting me. He thinks you're the predator here. Just take a step back and chill for a minute.”

I couldn't see Knox, but I knew he'd done as I'd asked, because the bear relaxed a bit. I could feel his body ease.

“It's okay, big guy. He's a friend.” The bear roared loudly in disagreement. “No, he really is,” I argued, finally getting my footing so I could stand beside the massive grizzly. “Watch. I'll show you.” I took a few steps toward Knox, only to be cut off by the giant brown ball of fur. His chocolate eyes stared deep into mine as though he were assessing my mental state. “Everything will be fine. I promise,” I told him, gently resting my hand on his head. “He won't hurt me.” The bear snorted his objection, but backed up a few steps to let me by. I could feel his eyes on my back as I moved toward the werewolf. “Knox,” I said softly. “Don't move.”