Fury Rising (20 page)

              She never should have done it. Loving Michael. She should have known better. Hadn’t she learned the first time? Her parents were dead. Her friends. Heath. Why had she allowed herself to love again knowing that the pain would come back? Because in this world, everyone she cared about would die and there was nothing she could do to stop it.

              Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.

              It wasn’t worth it. Love. All that pain she felt. None of it was worth it.

              “It’ll be dark soon.”

              The words came softly from the other little girl. Clementine couldn’t remember her name. She’d been very quiet, hardly speaking a word, even when Michael tried including her into the conversation. Although she hadn’t said a peep, she’d still done everything asked of her without question. Tall for her age and a little awkward, she couldn’t be older than eight or nine. Sitting next to Andrew, she’d allowed the little boy to climb into her lap. He leaned against her now, sucking his thumb, his head resting on her chest.

              “Red sky at night,” Andrew said as he straightened up and pointed towards the horizon. “Um. Red sky at night. Um. Such a delight!” He grinned, proud of himself for remembering.

              “Sailor’s delight,” the girl said.

              “Oh.” Andrew rested his head against her again. “My Mommy used to sing that to me all the time. There’s more, but I forget.”

              “Red sky at morning, sailor take warning,” the girl finished. “It’s how they checked the weather a long time ago. They could tell by looking at the sky whether the day would be sunny or rainy. My Daddy taught me stuff like that. He had a boat. We used to go sailing. When the bad people came, Daddy thought we could get to the island. My Nana lives there. But we didn’t make it to the marina. We got cornered several blocks away. Daddy told me and my brother to run. Said don’t look back. Whatever you hear, don’t look back. I didn’t. But Taylor did. He looked back and fell.”

              “What happened to him?” Andrew asked. “Your Daddy?”

              “I don’t know,” the girl said. “I didn’t look back. I ran and ran. Eventually I found the boat. I stayed there for a week, but Daddy or Taylor never came. I wanted to stay there, but I got hungry. And I couldn’t sail the boat myself. Too hard and I didn’t know how.”

              “My Mommy went to get food,” Andrew said. “She told me to wait in the car and not open the door for anyone. Made me hide under the blanket. I think she got lost. I had to go to the bathroom, but I wasn’t supposed to leave. Then I had an accident and started crying. All night. I didn’t move. I stayed ‘cause Mommy always said it’s safest with my blankey. She told me to be a good boy and wait ‘till she came back. I was very scared. Like when you watch a movie and think the bad things are real. But I’m brave now. I was today, right? I only cried once.”

              “You did really good,” Janey assured him. “I’m very proud of you.”

              “I miss my Mommy,” Andrew said. “I wish she hadn’t gotten lost. I miss her kisses. She smelled nice. Like flowers. Sunflowers. The big yellow ones.”

              “I was with my grandmother,” the other little boy said. “My parents didn’t come home. But when we got to the big place, they took her away from me. I don’t know what happened to her. She used to make me cookies, but she never let me eat more than two at a time. I miss cookies. I wish we had some right now.”

              There was a moment of silence while the children seemed to think about the sweets they’d lost out on. Even Clementine couldn’t resist. Snickers. Michael had brought her a chocolate bar a week ago. He’d found it tucked away in an empty house. He’d known it was Clementine’s favorite. He wouldn’t even take a bite when she’d offered him some.

              “What about you, Casey?” Janey asked. “What happened to you?”

              “Mason found me,” Casey said.

              “No, before that,” Janey said. “Before you went to the big place with all the tents.”

              “Oh.” Casey’s legs moved back and forth as she kicked at the bus shelter advertisement for a movie that Clementine hadn’t seen and probably never would. A romantic flick about falling in love with the wrong guy. The lead actress gave a winning smile. Clementine wondered if she was still alive. Had she survived the earthquakes? Had she been dragged from the safety of her home and loved ones? Maybe she’d become a Bagger and now roamed Hollywood searching for fresh victims to destroy.

              Clementine stared at the poster. Why was falling in love with the wrong guy considered so romantic anyway? It made no sense. She thought about her mother who often said that you couldn’t choose the person you fall for. But she’d also been full of clichés like ‘love is blind’ and ‘love conquers all’. Of course Mom had gotten lucky in that department. She met Dad while still in high school and they’d never strayed. Prom King and Queen. They’d known they’d get married from day one.

              And look where love got them. At least they died together.

              Would Mom and Dad have liked Michael? Or would they have looked at his long hair and deemed him the wrong kind of guy for their daughter? No, she didn’t think so. Mom would have liked him. Michael would have charmed the pants off of her. Dad would have had reservations. He didn’t think any guy was good enough for his daughter. He’d never liked Craig Strathmore. Well, he’d been right about that one. Craig had been a crappy boyfriend, right up until the moment he’d tried to kill her.

              “It’ll be dark soon,” the little girl said again.

              Clementine looked at the sky. Above her, Canadian Geese flew in a crooked double line, honking to each other in a language only they could understand. The sun was retreating steadily into the row of houses in the horizon. The day would end and another would take its place. The geese would land on a beach and honk and crap everywhere. But Michael wouldn’t be there to see it. He’d never see anything again. And she was stuck at that bus stop, unable to do anything but stare blankly into the red sky, wondering what she could do to make the pain go away for good.

              And it didn’t help that the children were talking about their pasts as if everything that happened was normal.  

             
It’s not fair, Heath. They shouldn’t be sharing these stories. Their biggest problem should be going to bed while it’s still light out. How I used to hate that, especially since you got to stay up later. I remember standing on my bed, looking out the window, wondering about all the things I was missing out on.

             
Numb. She felt so numb. Or maybe it was the cold seeping in. Her fingers were clenched tightly in her lap. Clementine looked down. The entire front of her shirt was soaked in blood. She wasn’t sure how much of it was her own. Blood covered her pants. Michael’s blood too. The final remains of what had been his life, staining her shoes.

              Michael’s hands would never play guitar again. Fingers full of callouses from hours of practicing. How she wished she’d recorded him singing one of his songs. She’d give anything to hear his voice one last time. She’d never get to wake up next to him and listen to one of his silly jokes about how his brain couldn’t function until he’d filtered it with a few cups of coffee.

              Lots of sugar. Creamer if they could find it.

              She thought about the first time she met him, back in the diner. Sitting at the table in the dark, she’d trusted him instantly. He’d appeared broken, stuck in his own suffering. It wasn’t until several months later that he’d told her the story about how he’d lost the people in his group. How the Baggers attacked and Michael fled.

              “I was a coward,” he said.

              But he hadn’t been. Not the Michael she knew. No, Michael was a million things but coward wasn’t one of them. He had been brave and strong; always knowing the right things to say to make her laugh when all Clementine wanted to do was cry. He’d been kind and thoughtful, spending hours with her while she searched for Heath, sharing her enthusiasm and never once suggesting she was wasting her time chasing ghosts. He’d been love. The light in the darkness, always there to pull her close in the middle of the night and tell her everything was going to be okay.

              Michael had been the best part of her life, but now he was only dead.

              “My Daddy made us all hide in the basement,” Casey said. “We had to be quiet. Mommy wouldn’t even let us watch TV. She kept making us play Candyland, and my brother got mad. He didn’t like Candyland ‘cause I always won. We stayed in the basement forever. But the monsters still found us. I tried to be quiet. I really did.”

              “I’m sure you were very good,” Janey said.

              “I was!” Casey insisted. “But they killed everyone, even my brother. They took me to the big place and I found Mason. He takes care of me now. Or he will again. I can’t wait to see him. He’ll be happy that I’m braver now. That’s what I think.”

              Clementine remembered Graham, Casey’s father. He’d been a good man, determined to do whatever it took. He’d been one of the luckier ones. Where most of the people Clementine met had lost a family member or two, Graham had managed to keep everyone alive. His wife, parents, and children, and even a few neighbors. They’d kept well hidden in a safe house until the Baggers finally found them.

              Four stories. All of them similar, but different. Four children. There was one left. The others waited, but Janey didn’t say a word. Clementine found herself wanting to hear it. She needed the distraction, anything to keep her from thinking about the worst part. The black secret she needed to keep from herself as long as possible. A horrible memory that kept creeping into her consciousness.

              “What about you, Janey?” Clementine asked. Her own hoarse voice startled her. “What’s your story?”

              All the children turned to Janey, but she only shook her head. “I don’t want to talk about it.”

              Just like Clementine, Janey had memories she wanted to hide from. But no matter how much she tried, she couldn’t outrun it.

              “I told you about my Mommy,” Andrew said. “And I didn’t want to talk about it. But I did.”

              “Me too,” Casey said.

              “Yeah, well my story isn’t as good as yours,” Janey said. Her fingers tightened into a tiny fist. Clementine understood. Janey’s knife. Clementine had lost it during the fight with the Bagger. The little girl almost appeared lost without it. She opened and closed her hand several times before shoving Casey aside. Standing, she moved away from the bus stop until she was in the middle of the empty road.

              “Wait. Don’t go,” Andrew said. “I’m sorry.”

              “Don’t be sad,” the other girl said. “You don’t have to tell us if you don’t want.”

              “My Daddy became a monster,” Janey said. “He hurt my Mommy and he tried to hurt me. I had to run. And I did. I left my baby brother with my Daddy and I ran.”

              Janey glared at every one of them, eyes wet and shiny in the dying sunlight, almost daring them to say something. Clementine struggled to her feet, ignoring the fresh wave of pain in her shoulder. Ahead of her, Janey let out a loud wail before dropping to the cement. As she started towards the young girl, Clementine’s leg almost gave out beneath her. But a fresh dose of determination stopped all that. Moving quickly, she reached down and pulled Janey into her arms. Crossed legged, she held the girl tightly, rocking back and forth while they both cried. One by one, the others came over and joined them, until all of them sat in the middle of the Lougheed Highway, a big giant group hug.

             
I can’t leave them, Heath. What was I thinking? They’re babies. I’m the absolute most selfish person in the world. They may not have known Michael, but his death affected them too. They’re just as lost as I am. And to think I wanted to send them off by themselves.

              No more of this. She’d get them back to camp. But first she would have to find a pharmacy or grocery store. If she didn’t get the bleeding in her shoulder under control, she might not make it. She looked down the street. There had to be more stores in that direction. A bottle of water to wash the wound and something to wrap it. How hard could it be?

              And suddenly Clementine was determined again.

              She let the children cry themselves out. It took about ten minutes before the last tear fell. By then, Janie was back to her old self with the permanent stubborn frown etched across her mouth.

              “Time to go,” Clementine said. “It’s going to take all night if we have to walk. Hopefully we can find a car. I promised I’d have you all back by midnight.”

              “Mason!” Casey jumped up and did a little dance. She grabbed Andrew by the hand and tried spinning him around. “Wait ‘till you meet him. He’s the best. I’m gonna marry him when I grow up. Right, Clemmy?”

              Clementine found herself almost smiling. Almost.

                                                        *              *              *

              They walked for a good hour before Andrew spotted the car dealership. By then, the sun had completely disappeared, leaving them struggling to find anything in the darkness. Clementine often thought about how much she had taken things like streetlights for granted. To her, there was nothing spookier than a completely blacked out city.

She made the kids hide in the parking lot, sandwiched between a truck and an older model SUV. Andrew immediately hated the idea of waiting there. It probably made him remember his mother all over again. And with Michael’s death fresh on everyone’s minds, everyone wanted to stick together.

“I’ll be right back,” she said. “And you’re not alone. You have Janey. She’s just as good as me, maybe even better.”

“What if you don’t come back?” Andrew clenched the front of his shirt tightly. None of them were dressed for the evening and it was chilly. The clouds were coming in fast and Clementine worried that it might rain.