Girl on the Run (19 page)

I pushed him away and took off across the grounds, feeling more hurt and confused than ever. Lacey had prompted Kirk to find this guy she knew would be a perfect replacement for me. That way she could have Kirk all to herself. I was sure there was more than one eel at the bottom of the lake for her bed.

I sped up, wishing I was invisible. This was hard enough, let alone with an audience.
Get to the cabin
, I kept telling myself,
and then pack and disappear.

“J.J.!” Liam and Duff met me halfway. “There's some guy at the cabin saying he's our new counsellor.”

My stomach dropped. “He's here already?”

“Are you leaving?” Duff signed.

“They're replacing me.”

“Why?” Liam asked.

“Don't you know?” I asked.

“No,” he said. “We only found out when this new guy showed up. He's just waiting on the porch.”

A tall blond guy was leaning against the railing with his back to us.

“Perfect,” I said, gritting my teeth. “I didn't even get a chance to pack up my stuff. Not that it matters, since the whole camp has already seen my underwear.”

No one was laughing.

Kirk caught up with us, and put a hand on my shoulder. “I'll go talk to him,” he offered. “He knows me. I'll just explain.”

“Never mind.” I pushed past him. “I can handle it.”

“Is there going to be fight?” Liam asked excitedly. I ignored the comment and kept my eyes fixed on the porch. Scotty and Spencer were standing on the bottom steps.

“What's going on?” Spencer asked.

“J.J.'s going to beat up the new counsellor!” Liam told him.

I ran up the steps, hearing the rest of them following behind. I held my ground with my hands on my hips, ready to face my replacement. Wild West, here we go again. He turned around and gave me a big smile full of perfect teeth.

All the air left my lungs.

“Dill Pickle?”

“
J
esse!” Ben said. He wrapped his arms around me, practically picking me up off the porch.

“Dill pickle?” Spencer said. “I can't wait to hear the story behind that nickname.”

“You know each other?” Liam asked.

“Um…yeah,” I stammered, still in the hug, still in shock.

Ben smiled at me. “I'm working here now.” He turned to face the others, with his arm still around my shoulder. “Cabin 4, right?” he asked Kirk.

“It's 4A,” I stammered, barely audible.

“Yeah,” Kirk said, taking in the image of us together. “Looks like you got it, all right.”

“New counsellor?” Spencer asked. The boys looked at each other, totally confused.

I hit Spencer with a hard look. “Your dad's idea,” I explained.

“Is this true?” Scotty asked.

Ben squeezed my shoulder and actually laughed. “Kirk called me himself,” he said, oblivious to the awkwardness. By now, all four boys plus Kirk and Ben were standing on the tiny porch staring at me. I was drowning in testosterone.

“I have to get my stuff together,” I said. I slipped out from under Ben's arm and walked into Cabin 4A for the last time.

I stood in the doorway, staring at my tiny bedroom. Susan's efficiency almost seemed vindictive. The bed had already been changed, and the room cleaned. My duffel bag lay in the corner, bulging with all my belongings.

“Some reward,” I said. I purposely stayed in the room for at least fifteen minutes. I hoped the others would fill in Ben, at least sparing me the humiliation of having to explain why he was called.

But I didn't have to worry about fielding any questions, because no one was waiting for me on the porch. I tugged at the strap of my duffel bag, and crossed the grounds toward a waving Susan.

“Jessica,” she smiled, all sunshine and lollipops. “That's you now.” She pointed to a building half the size of the former nurse's office. It was the last one before the woods began, which also happened to be the farthest one away from the bathrooms and showers.

The door squeaked noisily on the rusty hinges. It was gray and cold. I threw my duffel bag on the floor and flopped down on the lone twin bed pushed up against the wall. It still smelled like dirt and mowed grass. A pathetic plastic mirror had been taped to the bare wooden wall. I frowned at the blank space where a clipboard would have been.

“Guess I don't have to worry about making sure none of the boys die now,” I said to the empty room.

I stayed in my dark prison and purposely missed lunch. I had no desire to make an appearance. I started to unpack,
again
, when there was a knock at the door. I froze, crouched on the floor, knowing the screen door would allow Kirk to see I was there, and not invisible, like I wished I was. He tapped again and then said my name, making me finally face him.

“Ben,” I said, going to the door.

He stood with his hands behind his back, smiling shyly. “Is it okay,” he asked, “for the new counsellor to visit the old counsellor?”

“Yeah…sure,” I said.

He took one step inside, letting the door close behind him. He shifted his feet and looked around my little shed-slash-cabin. “The thing is,” he started, “I didn't know I was replacing anyone.” He took in my open duffel bag and tiny twin bed. Then his gaze met mine. “I'm sorry,” he said.

My resolve melted a little. “It's not your fault,” I said. “Apparently, the search was on from day one.”

Ben tilted his head. “Um…does this mean you don't hate me?”

“Why would I hate you?”

“When you stood on the porch, you looked ready for a battle.”

No kidding.

“I was surprised,” I said. “I didn't think I'd ever see you again. Chloe emailed that you had quit your job at the beach and were leaving town early.”

Ben nodded like he'd just figured out the last math problem on the final exam. “After playing phone tag for a week, I finally talked to Kirk. When he offered me the job, I jumped at the chance to come up.”

“Seriously?”

“Yeah,” he smiled. “And to see you again. Chloe gave me your message, and I guess that sealed the deal for me.”

I connected the dots and felt sick to my stomach. The irony of that simple email was not lost on me. God, I hate irony! I was partly to blame for this mess of a day—just like every other mess.

“Although…” he started carefully. “I pictured a different reunion.”

I took my time answering. I knew he was dipping his toe in the water to check the temperature. I was torn. Kirk and Lacey had been trying to replace me the whole time. I had no idea where that left me and Kirk. I certainly didn't trust him anymore.

And now, here was Ben. I stared at him, trying to remember how it was in my driveway when he kissed me good night. The last time we were alone together, our tongues were sliding over each other. Suddenly, the room felt warm.

He shifted his weight again and revealed a package from behind his back. “I found this in one of the drawers,” he said. “I'm assuming it's yours.”

I blushed. “Chloe,” I smiled, taking the bag labelled MIDNIGHT STROLL. “She knows I'm hopeless. Thanks.”

“No problem,” he said. “It's not my size anyway.”

It made me laugh, and for the first time since breakfast, I didn't feel like a total loser. He gave me another one of his perfect smiles. “I noticed you weren't at lunch.”

I faked a cough hoping my stomach wouldn't rumble. “I had other stuff…going on,” I lied.

Ben frowned for a moment, almost confused. “I'll see you at supper, then?”

“Yeah.”

He took a few steps toward the door. “It's a good thing one of the twins has a mohawk,” he joked. “I'd keep getting them confused.”

“Cabin 4A is an interesting bunch,” I said.

Ben checked his watch then put his hands in his pockets. He was stalling. The quiet was starting to get uncomfortable. “I don't want things to be weird between us,” he finally said. “I came up for the job and hoping to spend more time with you…is that okay?”

I held Chloe's package against my chest. “It's okay,” I said. The words hung in the air.

“Okay,” he repeated. He waited by the door, but didn't open it.

“I have to unpack,” I said, motioning to my duffel bag on the floor.

“Right, yeah. I need to get going anyway,” he said. “We've got a busy afternoon planned. I'm taking the boys out on the lake, then beach volleyball. Tonight, I'm taking one of them to help me steal food from the kitchen for the monopoly marathon and…”

“Awesome, Ben,” I said, reaching past him and opening the door. “You're just what they need.”

I watched him walk away, but he turned and gave one last wave before he disappeared around the corner. I checked the time. I had three hours until supper. Not nearly enough time to lick the salt out of my wounds.

I
stood at the front of the main hall with my tray of macaroni and cheese, and a side dish of tomato salad, having flashbacks to the very first day. But this time I wasn't anonymous. News of me being replaced wasn't generating gossip, but my replacement was. Several female counsellors surrounded my old table in the corner. But Lacey, interestingly enough, was not around.

Kirk's spot was empty too. My heart felt like it was being squeezed. I hated that this was getting to me. A roar of laughter from Cabin 4A's table brought an unexpected pang of loneliness. I saw how well Ben fit in with the boys. They were never that happy with me. And it wasn't so much the fact that Ben waltzed in and took over as easily as he did, it was the fact the boys let him.

I scanned the benches for an empty place. The only available seats were too close to Devin, at Lacey's table, or with the younger kids. The choice was obvious.

I pushed open the kitchen door with my back. Two grey-haired ladies in flowered aprons turned and nodded my way. The Brasseau sisters, I presumed. They smiled at me, then I saw the heavier one nudge her sister. They shared a snicker, then returned to slicing strawberries.

They spoke in hushed whispers, laced with a French accent. They were making fruit salad.

I took in the pleasant atmosphere of the kitchen. I should have asked to work here for the rest of the summer. Lewis cleared a spot on the island and pulled up a stool for me.

He put a slice of banana bread on my tray. “How are you?” he asked.

I was already on my third spoonful. “Hungry,” I said through a mouth of macaroni.

“I'll be right back. I have to check the buffet.”

I inhaled my supper and started looking for a pot to scrape out seconds from. The door swung open and Lewis returned, with Kirk in tow.

I opened my mouth to protest.

“We have to talk,” Kirk said, coming up to me.

I glared at Lewis. The Brasseau sisters shared a look, then the heavier one murmured something in French, which made the other nod slowly, her dangling earrings swung back and forth.

“What?” Lewis shrugged innocently. “Kirk wanted some banana bread.”

Kirk stared at me with those milk chocolate eyes, playing with my heart. “Please tell me.”

I was still holding the pot I'd been eating out of. “Tell you what?”

“What I can do to make this up to you.”

“Fire Lacey.”

Lewis stifled a laugh from the sink.

“Be serious,” Kirk sighed.

“Be truthful.”

The muscles around Kirk's jaw clenched. “I haven't lied to you,” he said.

I slammed down the pot. “You still don't get it,” I said. “Why do you think I'm eating in the kitchen? My place is gone. I have nowhere to sit.” Then I added for good measure. “But yours is still there, why don't you go fill it?”

“
Mon dieu
,” the Brasseau sisters chuckled, still keeping their backs to the drama.

Lewis went to hand Kirk a slice of banana bread, which I intercepted and began to eat.

“I missed lunch,” I said while chewing.

“I noticed,” he said.

“So did Ben.”

Kirk straightened up. A look I hadn't seen before crossed over his face. Jealousy?

“You're pissed,” he said, with a slight edge to his voice. “I get that. But I'm not going to play this game with you.”

“Great, go play with yourself then,” I said.

Lewis laughed out loud this time. The kitchen door swung open again.

“There you are.” Ben stood there smiling at me. Then he noticed the empty pot. “I'm supposed to bring you to the table, but it looks like you've already eaten.”

“Bring me to the table?”

Ben clapped Lewis on the back. “This lovely lady needs something delicious on a plate.”

Wordlessly, Lewis put two more slices of banana bread on a plate and handed it to me.

“Um…thanks,” I said.

Ben put his arm around me. “Captain Kirk, I'm surprised at you,” he said, “making her eat in the kitchen. I thought you ran a tighter ship than that.”

Kirk's posture stiffened. “You remembered that nickname I love so much.”

“Come on,” Ben said, squeezing my shoulder. “Cabin 4 is requesting the honour of your presence at the table in the corner. It'll be a tight squeeze though,” he winked. “We'll have to sit close, I hope you don't mind.”

“Cabin 4
A
,” I said under my breath.

The fact I that was in a room being stared at by three guys I had kissed in the last month gave me the creeps. All we needed was for Liam and Devin to show up, and it would be one of those horrible talk shows.

Grandma was right. More kisses than I've ever had before.

The hall was still full of eating campers.

“J.J.!” Scotty smiled as I sat down across from him. Spencer slid over to accommodate Ben and me.

“What's your new cabin like?” Liam asked, fixing one of his spikes.

“Um…small,” I said. It was weird to be with them. This must be how the runner up in a beauty pageant feels when she has to step in halfway through the reign because of some scandal about the first queen. It's like they're saying, “
You're not our favourite choice, obviously, but we'll let you tag along.
”

Ben filled me in about their afternoon. Spencer had backed out of the canoe races, opting instead for two hours of beach volleyball with the cupettes.

“Lacey's in her red bikini today,” Spencer grinned.

“Ah, Lacey,” Ben sighed.

“Get in line,” I grumbled.

“Sorry?” Ben said.

“I need a lime,” I said. “Water with lime, I'm really thirsty.”

Scotty started to stand. “I'll get it for you,” he offered.

“No, it's okay.” I motioned for his to sit back down.

Scotty gave me a weak smile then crinkled his brow. Ben had his arm around me, gripping the bench on my other side. My side was practically welded into his chest.

“So, you worked here last summer?” I asked Ben.

“The last few, actually. I told you in the car, after the movie that night.”

“Right,” I blushed. “I didn't realize you meant this actual camp.”

“Movie?” Scotty frowned.

Spencer's face lit up. “Was it at the drive-in?” he asked.

“Move.” Kirk appeared behind Scotty and sat down across from me. I concentrated on picking all of the banana bread crumbs off my plate.

Liam sensed an opportunity. “Ben was telling us about his date with J.J.”

“Really,” Kirk said.

Beam me up, Scotty!

“Okay!” I stood up. “You guys have a busy evening, and I still need to unpack. See you later.”

I practically ran to the door then did my best power walk across the lawn. I felt like I was going to be sick. I had no idea how to handle one guy let alone two.

“Jazzy?” Lacey stood, laughing. “Is supper not agreeing with you? The bathroom is the other way.”

She was still wearing her red bikini. “It's five-thirty in the evening,” I said. “What is this, Miami?”

“Oh?” She looked down at her perfect body. “It's so comfortable I forgot I had it on.”

“Whatever.”

She was about to bitch back, when something behind me caught her attention. Her sneer turned into a beauty pageant smile. “Benny!”

Lacey pushed by me and launched herself at Ben. Laughing, he gave her a pat on the back then stepped away.

He crossed his arms in front of his chest. “I didn't think you were coming this summer.”

“I changed my mind,” she said. “I guess you did too.”

“Yeah.” He nodded my way. “Jesse invited me. Well, sort of.”

Lacey kept the beauty pageant smile, but I could tell she was trying to channel her ancestor, Medusa.

“You know Jazzy?” she said, through her frozen grin.

Ben looked at me. “How many nicknames do you have?”

“Too damn popular, I guess,” I said.

“What do people call you when they want to invite you to play football?” he asked.

“Um…”

“They say Lacey, come watch me play football,” she interrupted.

“Lacey,” he smiled at her. “Come watch me play football.”

“Sure,” she grinned.

He turned back to me. “Well?”

“Lacey's a better cheerleader than me.”

“I don't want you to cheer,” he said. “I want you out there playing…with me.”

From the corner of my eye I could see Lacey's mouth hang in a perfect “O.” There are times when I wish I could press the pause button, freezing a memory in place. The look on Lacey's face was one I would carry forever.

So that's what a beauty queen looks like when she's jealous.
First he pissed off Kirk then he snubbed Lacey. At that very moment, Ben was my favourite person on the planet. I looked down at my sweatshirt and gym shorts. I needed another outfit, but this time I could handle the look without Chloe's wardrobe.

I tore into my duffel bag and found my Lululemon tank top and high cut running shorts. I combed out my hair and made two braids. Slipping into my flip-flops, I did a quick inspection in the mirror. Beauty queen in a bikini I couldn't do, but cute and sporty was definitely my look.

Lacey and two of her cupettes were sitting on the grass close to the beach, where the lawn is at its most level. I recognized Tyler and a few others. Three of my guys were there. Duff was otherwise occupied, giving Diana another sign language lesson. I smiled, noticing how he touched her hands, making corrections.

“Come on, J.J.,” Liam hollered. “You're on our team.”

Half the group on the field had their shirts off.

“Unless you want to be on the skins team?” Tyler joked as I walked by.

Ew.
If he says panties, I swear I'm punching him.

I took my place on the lawn. Ben was our quarterback, while Spencer and Scotty were on the other team. I leaned forward with one hand on my knee, staring into the face of my opponent. Devin. Great.

Ben called out a few numbers and the play began. I couldn't get past Devin. Liam caught the ball, but was immediately tackled by Spencer.

After the other team got three touchdowns, Ben came up with a plan. “Jesse, you're the fastest runner,” he said. “I'll fake to Liam first then throw to you.” We nodded, and his hand slapped my butt.

“For luck,” he winked.

I put my hand to my throat and thought of my necklace. When I looked out at the lake, I noticed Kirk. It was his best look, I had to admit. Peeling off the diving mask, he walked out of the water, tanned and lean. He stopped when he saw the game.

I turned away before he could catch me drooling. Crap! One half of me felt like running up and punching him, and the other half felt like pressing against him.

I crouched down and was surprised to see Tyler instead of Devin.

“Hey, Jesse,” he grinned. “Are you wearing the s'mores pair tonight?”

At least he didn't say ‘panties'. “Joke's on you, Ty,” I said. “I'm not wearing any.”

I swear his pupils actually dilated. I easily dodged around his blank face and caught the pass. I gave our team its first touchdown. I glanced at the bench but Lacey wasn't cheering for me.

Ben let one of the other counsellors quarterback, and he took the field beside me, facing Devin. I squatted in front of a bitter Tyler, who was pushed out of the way.

“I'm subbing you out,” Kirk said, taking his place.

“All right,” Ben laughed, “some real competition.”

Kirk stood dripping in his trunks. He spun his Leafs cap around, so the peak was on the back. We squared off against each other. Crouching close, he stared back at me, and then slowly his gaze travelled down to my throat. My heart sped up.

“Jesse!” Ben called out.

I'd missed the whole play. Everyone had run around us, while we stayed rooted to the spot.

“Sorry,” I said. We positioned again, and I kept my eyes on the ground.

“Go twenty-four,” he whispered.

“Stop it,” I said, still looking at the grass.

“If you catch the ball,” he said. “I have to tackle you.”

“So?”

“It's your choice.”

My eyes locked on his. “You are so confusing!” I hissed.

“Are you harassing my Jesse?” Ben asked Kirk.

“
Your
Jesse?” Kirk raised his voice.

“Um…
hut, hut,
” I called out. Leaving the two squabbling suitors behind, I raced down the field. With one giant lunge, I jumped up and caught the ball. My feet didn't even touch the grass before he had his arms around me. We fell to the ground and rolled together a few times. I stared down at his face, my braids dangling above his smile with the football crushed between our chests.

“We're on the same team,” I said between breaths.

“Oops,” Ben said, wrapping his arms around me tighter.