Girl Seduced (The Girl Interrupted Trilogy Book #1) (12 page)

             
He continued.  “Are you feeling any withdrawals at all?  The doctors said that the first few days you were here, they had to give you alternative medications to help with the withdrawals, but how do you feel right now?”

             
I nervously smiled.  “Just peachy.”  They both smiled.  Detective English looked at me square in the eye.  “I hurt all over, but I think that would be normal considering my injuries,” I whispered in a raspy voice. 

             
“I think it’s time for you to talk with your father alone, Jasmine.  You need to tell him everything.  We will check back with you in a couple of days.  We’re going to talk with your doctor and see how long you’re expected to be in the hospital, but the sooner we can clear this up, the better.  Are you willing to work with us?”

             
I couldn’t believe I was considering being a snitch on the one person who had helped me all of this time.  But, I knew that, in reality he was helping himself.  He was paying his bills and I almost died.  Drug dealing seems like a victimless crime and, while no one held a gun to my head and made me take the drugs, he and I both knew they were dangerous and I knew, in my gut, that he needed to be stopped.  I was stupid, but he had the avenue that I willfully went down because of my stupidity.   I sighed.

             
“I have to do what the right thing is to do.  I’ve let everyone I know and love down and probably lost my career. But more importantly, I could have died.  And, if this person is selling something to young people, someone else really could die or become paralyzed, because of what he is selling. Of course I will work with you.”  They both smiled, patted my hand and my doctor winked at me. 

             
“That’s what I want to hear.  We’ll see you soon.  Get some rest.”  Ben smiled and, surprisingly, so did Detective English. 

             
“I’ll be back in a moment,” Dr. Broughman smiled.    He stepped outside with them and I could hear them talking lowly outside the door, but I could also hear my family coming down the hall.  I had to switch my countenance and face the reality that my father and I were fixing to have a very serious talk.  Not in front of everyone, but I was going to have to have him stay and everyone else leave.  The show was about to begin and I didn’t feel like the star, even though mine was the lead role.

Chapter Eighteen

The next few days were the hardest days of my life.  Being gang raped by strangers was nothing compared to having to face my father and admit that I was voluntarily using methamphetamines to get through college and buying them from a seasoned drug dealer. 

That morning, the first morning that I was able to speak, everyone came in with flowers and non-stop chat, as if we were at a public social, excited, ecstatic that I was feeling better and mom was even planning a spa day for me once I was released and feeling up to it so I could get back to my “old self”.  What I would give to be my old self, but I couldn’t tell her.  I wondered if dad would tell her or if he would be able to figure out a way to handle this legal nightmare and somehow keep it secret. 

Even if he did, how would I ever be able to hide a rehabilitation center for drug users?  I couldn’t just answer the phone like I did in the dorm because they took your cell phones, your jewelry, your deodorant, even your hair shampoo in places like that because they were afraid you might hurt yourself or try to get high on things like mouthwash or the aerosol from the hairspray.  God, what have I done?

I took all of the pleasantries and fake happy talk that I could and politely asked Sabrina to tell everyone that I was getting really tired.  Of course, mom rushed over. 

“Well, of course, dear, what were we thinking?  You need your beauty rest!  You’re going to get better and get back into school and here we are talking about silly things like what kind of boots are on sale at Gimbal’s…” She smiled and wiped my bangs off of my forehead, as she had my whole life.  My poor sweet mother certainly didn’t deserve this.  What would this do to her? 

After I had been attacked at the first party, the police were very discreet and even though my father had access to all of my legal paperwork as my attorney, he was extremely discreet and obviously never told my mother the horror of what had happened to me that night.  As far as my mother knew, I had simply been attacked, smacked around a couple of times, and fallen and broken my arm. 

Now there was no more denying the total truth.  She was fixing to find out, along with everyone else, that I had been sodomized by seven total strangers, people who could have diseases that I still wouldn’t know about, and that I had actually become addicted to the very drug that poisoned my latte that night and had now poisoned my very soul. 

I wondered sometimes when I walked past people in the grocery store or on the campus  - “Are you one of them?  Did you do this to me?” Every time a guy my age looked at me in any way, I was sure he was one of them and that he was secretly laughing at his victory.  They had taken a life, a seemingly perfect life that had been carefully constructed and, in one night, had stolen my virginity, my innocence, and the absolute essence of the person that I was.  Things I would never be able to get back, no matter how hard I might try. 

Everyone was carefully kissing my cheek, forehead, patting my hand, and heading out the door.  Quietly, I said, “Dad…could I talk to you for a minute?”  Mom stopped. 

“Do you need us for something dear?  What else do you need?” I had never, in eighteen years, asked to speak to my father alone and my mother looked befuddled, to say the least. 

I didn’t know how to ask mom to leave, but I looked at dad.  He’s a very smart man and it didn’t take much for him to realize that I needed to talk to him alone
and that it couldn’t be good. 

“Winnie, you go on – I’ll be right out.”  He smiled, his politically correct smile that said, ‘you’re excused’ without being rude.  Mom stood there for a moment and then said, “Oh… well, ok, um…I’ll see you in the morning dear, OK?
I love you always…” and she blew me a kiss as the door closed behind her. 

“I love you
, too, mom.  Dad won’t be long.”  She wandered out seeming a bit lost, but the door finally closed.

Dad pulled up a chair and gave me the look.  I knew the look too well because I had seen him give it to many others, but never to me. 

“Alright, Jasmine, what’s going on?  What do you need to talk to me about that no one else can hear about? What kind of trouble are you in?”

Chapter Nineteen

I could never hide anything from my father.  He was simply too charismatic.  There was something about the way that he composed himself, the way he sat – his shoulders were always squarely facing his opposite – and those stern, dark eyes…those eyes could crack Jack the Ripper.  Honestly, if he had been sitting in front of my father, my father could say two words and Jack the Ripper would have admitted every single offense he had ever committed and probably made up a couple just to satisfy my dad.

I don’t know how the words found themselves to my mouth, but they started pouring out.  I couldn’t stop.  It was like a catharsis, and as I continued speaking, from the moment of my attack to this very moment, it was the first time I had ever seen my father actually in shock.  For a moment, I was actually afraid, until he spoke.

“Jasmine, do you realize what you’ve done?  Do you realize how serious this is?  What do you expect me to do about this?  What in the hell got into you?  What were you thinking?  You honestly expect me to go to bat for you?  A drug abusing ill-reputed young woman who has wasted eighteen years of your life for a cheap high and a bunch of guys who you didn’t even know?  How are you ever going to tell your husband about this one day?  Does Jonathan know about this?...” and he didn’t stop for another solid half hour.

I had never heard him be so cruel.  His words were slicing into my very soul, and every one of the were absolutely right and they were well deserved,
but I couldn’t believe that he didn’t feel any sympathy at all for what had happened to me. 

“Dad, are you going to help me?”  I was terrified that he was fixing to walk out and leave me on my own.  I didn’t know what I would do.

“Jasmine, that should be the least of your worries.”  He stood up and took out his phone.  “I don’t know who you are.  I feel like
my
daughter died in that attack.  She might as well have.”  He walked out of the room already making calls, which meant that he was at least beginning the process of finding out what to do.  But I couldn’t believe that he was so cruel.  I think I just got disowned by my own father. 

About an hour later, he returned.  He could see that my eyes were red from crying, but was completely disinterested.  He simply started asking questions, as if her were talking to his plumber or a client who he had never met.

“Jasmine, when you jumped out the window, the police obviously searched your room, thinking that someone had either pushed you out the window or had tried to break in.  When they didn’t find any signs of forced entry or of anyone else even having been in the room, they did continue to search and found your drugs.”  He stopped and took out his personal tape recorder.

“I’m going to tape this conversation – it is protected because at this point, I am acting as your attorney, but I would advise you that the entire truth is not only necessary at this point, but I am giving you no other choice.  I will walk out of this room if you refuse to tell me anything, young lady…do I make myself clear?”

“Crystal.”  I was making a dark pun, but he didn’t catch it and if he did, he was so angry, that he continued questioning me as if he didn’t.

“Dad…” he didn’t look up.  I started crying because I couldn’t it.  I had never seen him this way.  “ I love you and I’m so sorry…I didn’t mean…”

“Jasmine, we need to stick to what is going on here.”  He paused and took a breath.  “You know I love you too and I am absolutely sickened every time I think about what happened to you last fall.  That investigation is still ongoing and God only knows what we are going to find out from that.” 

“Am I going to get kicked out of school because of this?”

“Jasmine, you’re going to be very lucky if you don’t go to jail for this.” 

“JAIL?  But…I only…I mean, I’ve never even gotten a speeding ticket.  Surely, there’s something…I mean you’re one of the best attorneys there is, dad.  Jail?”  I started breathing harder than I meant to and one of the nurses came  in and asked if everything was OK. 

“Sweetie, your monitor went off at the station…do we need to take a rest from all of this for today?”

“NO.”  I had to find out what all was going to happen.  “I mean, thank you, but no.  I have to finish this.”

The nurse hesitated.  “Well, I am going to give you a mild sedative,” she looked at my father, “if that’s OK, Mr. Stanton, this doesn’t need to take much longer – the sedative may make her sleepy.”  This was her way of saying that I would be asleep within the hour and that he needed to finish whatever he was doing.  I know the nurse was trying to protect me, but at this point, I not only didn’t deserve to be protected, but needed to hear the cold, hard facts from my father.

She inserted a catheter into my IV and injected a medication.  I immediately felt relaxed and calm. 

“There – better?”  She didn’t wait for a response and walked out.  My father didn’t stop.

“Well, I guess you must be feeling better.”  A crack about drugs, I was sure.

“Dad, I didn’t ask her to…”

“Let’s just
get finished here.  I have a lot of work to do – I’m going to have to meet with this judge and see if I can pull some connections and find out also what’s going to happen and when.  Can we get back to work please?”  That was not a request for my permission, but a direct order.  I didn’t answer.

“As far as school, that’s the least of your worries right now.  That’s going to be up to the dean of the college and the board of directors, at the very least.  At this point, the best case you can expect will be court-order drug rehabilitation for at least 30-60 days; you’re very lucky we’re at Christmas break because you may be able to keep at least the credits for what you’ve earned during this semester.  You have taken all of your finals, correct?” His glasses were sitting down low on his nose.  He meant business.

“Yessir.”  He continued writing.  “They will look at your first semester grades, your previous record, and with any grace or mercy, with a very convincing letter of apology and, perhaps an appearance in front of the board pleading forgiveness, they may allow you to attend another semester to monitor your behavior.  Most colleges will not allow someone with a felony on their record to continue college, so hopefully, they will knock this to a misdemeanor and allow you to regain your credibility.”

My head was spinning.  From the sedative?  From the word felony?  I couldn’t tell. 
Probably both and the reality that I may never be a journalist.  Barbara Walters might be interviewing me, but as a female in a state correctional facility angle…..

“Jasmine – pay attention.  I don’t have a lot of time.” 

“Sorry, dad.  What did you say?”

“
I SAID that the police found roughly a gram and a half in your apartment…how have you been using this drug?  Do you smoke it or inject it?  They didn’t find any paraphernalia so that will work in your favor, if your medical records support what you say about your method of use…”