Girl Seduced (The Girl Interrupted Trilogy Book #1) (2 page)

As is always the case, the girls who wore the push-up bras and the extensions and had the filthiest mouths or chose the most sexually controversial topics to discuss in front of the class, were the ones who made the best grades or who were chosen to be the class helper.
My work was impeccable, so I was one of the few that professors had no choice but to grade fairly.  College was totally different than high school - I had never been in a situation where a student had to flirt or act out of character in order to succeed in schoolwork, and yet this is where I found myself.

Sabrina, on the other hand, was right at home in college.  I learned so much from her
and about her in the first two weeks of school than I had ever known after going to school with her for most of elementary, middle and high school. I so totally thought that I knew her, but the freedom of college changes you. In college, you are free to be whoever you want – not only were your parents not there to watch or other parents there to tattle, but anonymity gave a lot of students, including Sabrina, a new-found identity that they had never been able to openly exercise before. 

It was a total shock to me the first time I saw Sabrina with a guy and a girl and the three of them holding hands and fondling each other in a way that I had never seen before.  She later told me that they were just friends, but that she had
ended up drinking too much and having sex with both of them at the same time and it “was a whole new world for her” that she didn’t even knew was there.  She never dreamed that she could actually have sex with more than one person at a time, much less a guy and a girl – meaning that she was now bisexual – and she knew that she had truly found herself and that this had been her “problem “ all along and she didn’t ever know it. 

“Sabrina, you’ve never had a problem.  You’ve just gone batshit crazy.
You’re not bisexual – you were drunk.  What’s wrong with you?  You don’t even know these people.  What if they have diseases?  Half of this campus probably knows what you’ve done and you haven’t been here for a month yet.  Is that what you want?  For people to think that you’re like that?    What’s gotten into you??” 

I was seriously mad and she could see it, but she didn’t seem to care.  I looked at her and she flicked her hair off of her face and I noticed that she had pierced the top cartilage of her right ear.
  Last week, she had tattooed a butterfly on her right big toe.  I grabbed her earring. Hard – I wanted it to hurt.

“What the hell is that?”  I stopped walking and stood in front of her in shock.  Sabrina had always been very social at home and in high school, it was no secret that she loved boys, she always wore her jeans a little too tight or her skirts a little too short, but she had never done anything like this – at least not that she had told me.  Maybe that was it.  She just didn’t tell me.

“Jasmine, get real.  Seriously.  I mean how long do you intend on keeping up this innocent girl act and, really, who are you doing it for?  College is AWESOME.  I’ve never had such a fantastic time in my life as I did last night.”  She paused. 

“Why don’t you just come over? 
Come on, Jasmine - you don’t have to do anything – just come over and meet some of my new friends – I want them to be your friends, too.  You’ll really like them.  It’s just going to me, a couple of other girls, and a couple of guys just hanging out…really…come on Jazz…”

“THEM?  Who are they?
And stop calling me Jazz, like it’s some kind of party name.”

“Whatever.  I’ve invited you to have one of the best times you’ll ever have.  You’re going to have to grow up eventually, Jasmine.  You’re my best friend, but maybe
we really are just changing.”  She flipped around, sure to cock her hip and walked in the other direction, unaffected completely by the conversation that had just taken place.  I watched her walk away, like someone I didn’t know.  I really wanted the old Sabrina back. 

Chapter Three

              Sabrina and I continued to grow apart, each day a little more, despite the fact that we shared a room.  I walked in a couple of times and she was in the room with other people, but I would leave.  I felt completely alone and really wanted to be part of her life again.  It had been four months since that conversation on the Green (the hill overlooking the West side of the campus), and she had continued her new life with her new friends without me.  I continued going to classes, we would talk just polite chat in the dorm room if we happened to meet, but my mind stayed on her, all of the time.  I wanted to be with her, wanted to share this experience with her and maybe she was right.  Maybe I was just being immature and it was time for me to change. 

             
I walked in one afternoon and she was sleeping.  She looked so tired.  But I really wanted to talk to her. I started putting my things down, trying to wake her subtly.  I coughed a couple of times, but she still didn’t wake up, so I shook her lightly. 

“Sabrina…”
she moaned, turned over a little and went back to sleep. “Sabrina, I really need to talk to you.  Can you wake up?   I’ll make you a cappuccino..”

“Oh, God, not another one of your lectures…”

I took a deep breath. “No, actually not.”  I made the cappuccino and handed it to her.  “I’ve been thinking.  A lot. About our conversation.”

             
“Which one, Jasmine?”  Sabrina sat up and listened to me.  She seemed

completely disinterested, but rubbed her eyes.  They were swollen and she had dark circles under her eyes.

              “I miss you.  And college isn’t what I thought it was going to be. It was supposed to us in college, not me doing my thing and you doing yours.  I want us to be friends again.  I want to be part of your life.  I want to be part of your friends’ lives.  After all, I was here first.”  I grinned.

             
Sabrina grinned back and sat up. “Jazz, do you mean it?  I mean, you really want to hang out and loosen up a little bit?”

             
I was nervous, but I agreed.

             
“Well, there is a party tonight…nothing special, just a bunch of friends getting together before Christmas break.  We’re just going to chill out and listen to music.   What do you think?  You want to go?  Just you and me?”

             
“I’d love to.”  I felt like we were in high school again, just for a moment.  “What should I wear?”

“NON
E of that plaid, preppy stuff. You’ll totally get laughed out of the place.  No, I’m going to help you pick something out.  Oh, this will be fun.  I’ll give you a makeover!   You won’t even recognize yourself!”

We started talking
again, like we were in seventh grade, Sabrina started working on me, and a couple of hours passed by really quickly.  It really seemed like old times.  Sabrina was more excited than I had seen her since we got here.  I was nervous – more than I had ever been.  But, college is definitely different.  And, being as immature as I was, maybe it was time for me to become more open to the realities of the world.  Especially if I was going to be a journalist.  College was a place to start.

             
All afternoon, I kept justifying it in my mind, but decided that, to be a good journalist I had to be able to experience different things.  I couldn’t write about college life watching from afar – I had to be part of it.  What the hell.  I was kidding myself and knew that I was going to a party with a bunch of college kids, but Sabrina was with me and she wouldn’t let anything happen to me.

Chapter Four

Sabrina and I spent the afternoon blowing dry our hair, putting on loads of makeup, and picking out the perfect clothes for the party.  Sabrina was convinced that we wanted to make a good impression since everyone was going home for the holidays – “give them something to look forward to coming back for”.  She wore jeans and a very slinky blouse that showed her entire back and she tried to do the same for me.  We compromised on jeans, boots and a tight shirt but it was very festive – it was black, covered in sequins and very fitted.  I felt extremely uncomfortable, but I was determined to make it a good evening.  She kept adding eyeliner to my eyes and tousling my hair – “loosen up”!!! she kept saying.  “You’re going to have a blast.  You’re going to be the newbie – none of these people really know you, right? They probably won’t even recognize you as great as you look… So you can “BE” whoever you want.  No one knows anything about you – and what goes on at frat parties, stays at frat parties, so why don’t you just
really
try for once to loosen up?  Try to enjoy yourself, OK?”

I frowned, looking in mirror.

“Are you sure I should go anywhere like this?  I mean, I look so…risqué…God, if my parents saw me…”

“THEY WON’T. Stop worrying and let’s go!!” 

  No – that’s just a polite way of saying slutty.  I had tried on several different pairs of jeans and blouses before deciding on this.  Along with the hairdo and the overdone makeup, I felt like it was perfect party attire.  At least that’s what I told myself.

Should I bring a camera?  I mean, this wasn’t like a going away party or a birthday party.  It was a “get blasted-have fun” party.
Everybody took pictures, uploaded them onto Facebook and let the world know what they were doing.  If I did something that might surprise old friends back home, I wanted them to know about it. Just to be on the safe side, I grabbed my Kindle, knowing that if I didn’t feel comfortable, I could always find a quiet corner and read and let Sabrina have her fun.  And, it had all of my contact phone numbers in it just in case I needed to make a call.  I would have more need for it than money or anything else. Makeup was a no-brainer – I never put on makeup in public.  I looked at Sabrina and stopped for a moment. 

Sabrina grew up in a family that was middle class, but she had two older brothers and a younger sister and never really got a lot of attention.  Her mother worked at the local grocery store and her father was an accountant, but didn’t make a lot of money.   They lived a normal life, but they weren’t wealthy like we were.  And, her parents never seemed to care very much about what she was doing or who she was with.  They always felt safe knowing that she hung out with me, so sometimes, she would come to my house and her dates would pick her up there and then drop her off there and she would spend the
night.  Her parents never knew the difference and my parents were usually in bed.  But she was always gorgeous.  Even when she woke up, she looked like she had just put on her makeup, her skin was flawless and her white-blonde hair was always straight and perfectly in place.  She had fabulous blue eyes that always sparkled.  When I was little, I liked imagining she was a fairy who could grant wishes because of her eyes. 

“How do you always manage to look like that?”
  I asked her as we were about to leave.  She was grabbing her purse.

“Like what?” She knew exactly what I was talking about
, but liked playing humble.

“Like you just stepped off of the cover of Vogue.  No matter where you go, you always look stunning.  I hate going anywhere with you because I can’t compete.
  Everyone is always looking at you and then they glance at me and look back at you.”

Sabrina hugged me and said, “You are just a worrier, as always.  Look at you…” she stopped and turned me towards the foyer mirror.  “You look amazing.
  Tonight is going to be different.  Let’s see who they look at now.”

I had to admit that I did look pretty good.  Better than I usually looked, but I didn’t usually care about looks – I felt like it was superficial.  But I had always been secretly jealous of Sabrina and I was glad that we were going together tonight.  People would see us together.

I smiled and grabbed my purse as well and we locked the dorm door.  “Whose car are we taking?”

“Don’t worry about a car.  Let’s catch a cab – we’ll grab a ride home.  The traffic is going to be terrible.”  I didn’t realize it at the time, but she knew that neither of us would be in any shape to drive home
if we made it home and there was no point in taking a car. 

Chapter Five

We heard
the music two blocks away from the party. I could see that there were lights, we could hear voices loud enough that they traveled for miles, laughter, an occasional scream of laughter…obviously, a party that was in full force.  It was at someone’s home – it wasn’t on campus. The campus security would have been all over this gathering, so clearly, it was far from the campus security and the rules that accompanied them.