Grace (The Family Simon Book 5) (21 page)

“We already won,” he said to Betty Jo. “What’s the point?”

“The point is, my friend, Grace Simon might be small and cute, but she’s tenacious as hell and doesn’t give up. And she sure as hell doesn’t like to lose.”

Matt watched her, his chest tightening when her brother, Teague, picked her up and threw her over his shoulder. He marched her over to one of the biggest snow drifts around and threatened to toss her into it. The two of them yelled and laughed and yelled some more until they both fell.

Eden Simon came rushing out of the house and peered over the upper deck. She spied her children and then relaxed, shaking her head before disappearing back inside. This family was whole. Intact. And he was humbled to be here with them.

“She’s not going to give up on you. You know that, right?” Betty kicked his foot.

“I’m not so sure.”

Betty Jo grabbed his hand and squeezed it hard. “I’ve never seen you like this before, Matt. She’s good for you. And in spite of what you think, you’re damn good for her.”

“Delilah came back.” And there it was in a nutshell.

Betty Jo sank back into her chair. “Shit. Did she and Grace talk?”

He nodded. “Yep.”

“What did the bitch tell her?”

“Nothing. As far as I know, nothing.” He glanced at Betty Jo. Saw her surprise.

“Well, what did she want? Did you talk to her? I hope you told her to screw the hell off and leave you alone.”

Matt took a sip from his mug, letting the hot tea burn its way down his throat. There were things that Betty Jo knew—things he’d not shared with any other soul. And yet, there was so much more to his story, stuff even she didn’t know. More pain. More shame.

“She told me that Ben is dying.”

“Aw, man.” Betty Jo set down her mug. “She could have written you a letter or sent an email. Or a text message for God’s sake.”

He laughed, not because he found her statement funny, but because it was so damn pathetic. “I guess she could have.”

“Did she fly?” Betty was getting worked up something good.

“Nope.”

“She
drove
all the way from Arizona?” Grace and Teague glanced their way, no doubt because Betty’s voice had risen at least two octaves. “
Mother trucker
.”

He looked at her. “Mother trucker?”

Grace looked exasperated. “It’s the only thing I could come up with that makes me feel almost as good as saying fuck.” She made a face. “Beau wasn’t happy because Fitz’s vocabulary was getting a little, uh, colorful.”

“I don’t doubt that for a second.”

“Anyway, he bet me a new Gucci bag that I couldn’t go a month without saying a curse word.”

“Guess you lost then.”

“Huh?” She whipped her head around and frowned.

“You just said the F word that rhymes with truck.”

She punched him in the arm. “Only counts if Beau or Fitz hears it.” She laughed and then grabbed up her mug of tea, her laughter slowly fading as her eyes rested on Grace.

“What are you going to do?” she asked.

“I don’t know. I haven’t laid eyes on Ben since…well, since that last time.” He shook his head, mouth thinned. “I don’t feel anything for him.”

“Bullshit,” Betty said quietly.

“You can’t call bullshit.”

“Sure I can. I know you, Matt. All these years you’ve been hurting because you feel exactly the opposite. He’s your father. At the end of the day, no matter what, Dale Benjamin Hawkins is your father. You’ve got unfinished business there and if he passes before you get a chance to make your peace with him—“

“I don’t want to make peace with that son-of-a-bitch.” He was angry now and tossed the remainder of his tea. Damn but he needed something stronger.

“Five years ago, hell, three years ago I would have believed you. But not now. No way. You’re not the same guy.” She kicked at the edge of the fire. “You need to close the door while you still can. Whether it’s to tell Ben you hope he rots in hell, or whether it’s to tell him you forgive him. I never got that chance. By the time I found my way back home, Dad was sick. Do you know what it feels like to think that my last conversation with him when he was healthy was me telling him that I hated him?”

She kicked at the fire again. “I told him I wished he had died instead of Mom.” Her voice shook and she sank back into her chair. “That’s a regret I’ll carry to the grave, Matt.”

He squeezed her hand and kept quiet, because she was right.

“Anyway, it’s not really Ben I’m concerned about. It’s Delilah.” Betty’s eyes narrowed. “I don’t trust her. She’s up to something.”

Hot billowing anger rolled through him. Betty Jo had no idea.

Matt got to his feet just as his cell phone rang, and looking for an excuse to escape his reality, he went with it.

“It’s Logan.” He pointed to the boathouse and wandered over, accepting the call from Logan Forest with a frown.

“Everything okay at my place?” he asked. “Dory all good?”

“Yeah. Just heard from my brother, Travis. He stopped by this morning and the dogs are just fine.”

Relieved, Matt swung around eyes searching for Grace. She was throwing snowballs at Sabrina’s twins. She looked young and innocent and so damn adorable. What the hell did she see in him?

“That’s not why I called.”

Matt turned and looked out over the lake. He was almost afraid to ask. “What’s up?”

“I got a call from your dad’s wife, Delilah.”

That cold shot of fear that had been dogging him for days roared to life and his free hand closed into a fist. He didn’t say anything. He just waited for the hammer to drop.

“She said that ah, she was trying to get hold of you but couldn’t get a number to reach you at. Found out I was married to Betty’s sister and thought we’d be able to get a message to you.”

Matt could barely speak. “Go on.”

Logan cleared his throat. “She said to tell you that Ben’s near the end, hours maybe. And that Justin has gone missing. She doesn’t know what to do. Said the police don’t consider it a missing person until it’s been forty-eight hours. I…she gave me her number and asked that you call.”

Matt’s eyes fell to the ground. Everything left him. His emotions. His fear. His anger. All of it was gone. He was just empty. His mind rolled back. Images of him and his father out on a boat. Of his dad teaching him to ride his bike…and his mother at their side. Of that stupid song “Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head,” and the two of them slow dancing in the living room.

When had it all gone to shit?

“Matt, who the hell is Justin?”

Logan’s voice jerked him back to reality. “Just a kid.” His voice was like sandpaper—no wonder because his throat was so damn tight.

“I’ll text you the number.”

Matt stared at the screen until the number appeared and rolled his finger over it repeatedly. Before he could think on it too much, Matt pressed the number and waited.

Delilah picked up before it rang twice.

“Matt?” She sounded frantic, he’d give her that.

“What do you want from me?”

“I don’t know what to do about Justin. I got back from Michigan a few hours ago and I think he’s been gone since I left. The police won’t even begin looking for him until forty-eight hours have passed and even then they won’t try. He’s been in trouble before and they just…they won’t try.”

Matt said nothing. His gaze found Grace again and she was looking at him as if she knew their little bubble was about to burst. She started walking toward him, joined by a concerned looking Betty Jo, but it was too late. He knew that now. He was shutting down and damned if he could do anything about it.

Matt Hawkins had survived most of his life by closing himself off. He had a feeling if he was going to survive what was headed his way, he was going to have to go deep. Disappear entirely. Who knew if he’d find his way back? Who knew if there would be anyone left who gave a damn?

“This is my cell. Text me your address.”

He slipped the phone into his pocket and waited. He didn’t give either woman a chance to say anything.

“I’m leaving.”

Betty Jo didn’t seem surprised, but Grace sure as hell did.

“What? Now?” Grace asked, eyes wide and searching.

“I have to fly to Arizona. I’ve got a situation. Something that I need to look after.”

Grace took the last few steps she needed to get close to him. “Does this have to do with Delilah?”

She was smart. His girl. He nodded. “Yeah, it does.”

“Who is she?”

He could lie. Lord knows he’d done it in the past. But what was the point in hiding the truth anymore?

“She married my dad when I was thirteen.”

Grace glanced at Betty and then turned back to him. “Why are you going to Arizona? Why now? I mean, can’t it wait?”

“No. It can’t. My father is dying. Might not last the night.”

“Oh, Matt.” She reached for him, her warm hands on either side of his face. “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know. I…let me come with you.” Her voice caught. “I want to come with you.”

Very carefully he peeled her hands from him and stood back, face expressionless and cold. Damn, but it felt as if the whole of northern Canada had seeped into his bones.

“Matt, what’s going on?” Betty Jo’s eyes were shiny with unshed tears and she linked her hand through Grace’s. “What has Delilah done?”

He needed to say his piece and get on with it. “Delilah’s son has gone missing and she needs my help.”

Betty Jo frowned. “That’s what the police are there for.”

“I can’t leave it up to the police. I need to do this.”

“I get that,” Betty replied. “But Matt, you and I both know how poisonous Delilah is. She’s using your brother to get to you.”

“I’m sure she is, but Justin. He’s just a kid.” He listened to his words. Took their meaning to heart. He’d resented the boy for so long that he’d never once considered the fact that he was blood. Matt’s blood.

“I’m sorry. I gotta go.” He nodded to Betty. “You’ll look after her?”

“Matt.” Grace yanked away from Betty, and threw herself at him. Her hands clutched at his jacket. “I want to help you. I want to be there for you. Why won’t you let me?”

For one crazy second, he nearly let her. But then reality hit him square in the chest and he blew out a long breath, shaking his head. He gently removed her cold hands. No was was his poisonous family getting anywhere near her.

“I’m sorry. I don’t want to hurt you but I have to go, and I need to do this alone.”

Matt hunched his shoulders and headed for his truck. He didn’t bother with goodbyes and was well aware that every single Simon in residence watched him leave. He bypassed the bunky and blotted out the memories created the night before.

He hopped into his truck and less than ten minutes later, Gravenhurst was in his rear view mirror. He rode in silence, his anger and frustration growing as his truck chewed up the miles. Each one of them bringing him closer to a past he wasn’t so sure he was ready to deal with.

27

G
race would have run after Matt. She would have tackled him, thrown her arms around him and begged him to take her with him. If he refused, she would have held on, even if it meant being dragged through the snow and ice and the gravel bits from the driveway.

She would have done whatever it took to be there for him. He needed her. Why didn’t he see that?

But her sister-in-law Betty Jo had other plans.

“Let go of me,” Grace snapped, pushing against Betty with everything she had. “I need to go to him.” But it was no use. Betty was tenacious and strong and she wasn’t giving an inch.

“Not a good idea, Grace. Trust me, if you crowd him now he’ll push back. He’ll push back hard.”

“But,” she sputtered, trying like hell to yank her arm from Betty’s grasp. “He needs someone. Didn’t you see his eyes? His face? It’s like there’s…like there’s…”

“It’s like there’s nothing there,” Betty said softly. “I know, Grace. I
know
Matt. I’ve known him since I can remember knowing anything or anyone who mattered.”

Matt’s truck roared down the driveway and disappeared from sight. Grace managed to free herself from Betty Jo but it was too late. She took a few steps but then her legs wobbled and she nearly fell on her ass. He was gone.

“I don’t believe this,” she whispered. Hot tears pricked the corners of her eyes. “We were having a good day. A good day…”

“Grace. I don’t know what to say. I…”

“Did you know about this? About Delilah? About this boy, Justin?” Grace whipped around to face her sister-in-law.

Betty Jo’s face was white and she slowly shook her head. “He hated Delilah for what she did to his family.” She wrapped her arms around herself and her teeth chattered.

“But what did she do?”

Betty’s eyes fell away and Grace’s stomach roiled. She was going to be sick. She took a step away, but couldn’t take her eyes from Betty. Her sister-in-law looked so sad. So heartbroken.

“Betty” Her voice broke. “What did she do?”

“Matt told me something once, when we were drunk or high, or probably both. He said something that’s always stuck with me.” Betty glanced over her shoulder but Grace’s family kept a respectful distance—they were too far away to hear their conversation. She made a noise, a painful, awful noise that tore at Grace’s heart.

“What did he tell you?”

Betty Jo was silent for so long that Grace thought she might have to beat it out of her. And considering the emotional state she was in, that was a real possibility.

“Matt told me that he hated Delilah more than he hated himself. And that he didn’t know if it was because he used to love her more than he loved himself.”

“But what does that mean?”

Betty shrugged. “I never asked him about it, and I’m sure he forgot what he said as soon as it came out of his mouth. You have to understand. Matt and I came together when we were both going through some pretty tough things. He’s my best friend. He knows things about me…things I shared with no one. But there’s a big part of his story that I don’t know.” She paused and wiped at her eyes. “And the ones that I do are heartbreaking and they’re not for me to share.”

Eden Simon appeared on the upper deck. She smiled down at everyone, oblivious to what had just happened, and announced that the turkey was ready. The Simon men headed up with the kids, leaving the two women alone.