Had To Be You (28 page)

“I didn’t win anything.” Rory lifted her eyes back to Amanda. “I told Matt last night that I still loved him. I made it clear I still wanted him.” Her voice trembled, but she continued on. “I gave him every chance…but he didn’t take it. He wants to marry you, Amanda. And you need to know that.”

Amanda’s lips parted, seemingly taken aback by this admission, and she blinked her eyes once in stunned silence. Then, gradually, the expression on her face shifted, her eyes darkening.

“If what you’re telling me is true?” She was now more composed, almost eerily calm, and deadly seriously. “He can never see you again. I don’t want him around you. You should still be at the wedding, but only because it would look bad if you suddenly weren’t there. But then please show some respect. Go back to your life, and for once and for all, get out of his.”

Even as her eyes filled, Rory nodded in understanding.

“You need to go now.” With that, Amanda simply moved over to the front door to hold it open.

Struggling not to double-over into sobs, her chest tight with choked breaths, Rory gathered up her broken pieces and walked out into the night.

All this time, she thought she was gathering the courage to finally tell Matt how she felt, and somehow get him back. Rory never could have known, in the end, it would actually come down to being brave enough to let him go.

NINETEEN

“How did you like the movie?”

She brushed the long hair from her eyes, the windows rolled down to the warm wind.

“I liked it. It was funny.”

“Yeah.” Jake grinned and adjusted his hand on the steering wheel. “I thought so, too.”

She snuck a glance while his eyes were on the road, studying his unfamiliar face in the glow of a passing streetlight.

Her mother nearly had a stroke when Jake’s car had first pulled up to the house, but Rory had been duly impressed with the way he quickly won her over, setting her at ease with his polished politeness. She was equally as impressed with the way he made such a gentlemanly show of opening her car door.

They were driving along Water Street now, and Rory imagined they would probably hit one of the pizza places downtown for a quick bite to eat. At least that seemed the course a typical date evening might follow—since she had nothing to base it on.

Lindsay and Jill were over at the house earlier, under the guise of helping her choose an outfit and get ready for what was to be her first official date. Really, they only wanted to grill her on what might happen, questioning Jake’s motives, anticipating his sexual advances and plotting her counter-tactics. This, while pulling out the most revealingly short floral sundress from her closet and dousing her in perfumed body spray until she smelled like a vanilla-soaked peach.

Rory wasn’t confused by mixed messages, however. And, while she might have been impressed with his opening act, she found she wasn’t really all that overwhelmed or intimidated by Jake’s good looks or senior status. For some reason, now that she was actually out with him, he didn’t really make her as nervous as she imagined.

She was kind of ready to go home.

“What time did you need to be back?” he asked.

“Eleven,” she answered, pressing her lips together slightly. It was still, however, somewhat embarrassing to have such an early curfew.

Jake edged the wheel away from the direction of all the eateries downtown, instead turning his car towards the old beach road. “Maybe we could head down Thatcher’s Cove for a while.”

She paused with a hesitant frown. “Why? Is there, um…is there a party going on there tonight?” she asked in a smaller voice.

A fleeting grin flashed across his expression before he reached over, his fingertips grazing the smooth skin of her slender thigh at the bottom edge of her dress.

“Not that I know of. I just thought we could hang out—you and I. Get to know each other better.”

Discreetly, she edged her leg away, tugging the hem down, and swallowed as her throat went a bit dry.

A moment later the car slowed to a stop at a quiet, deserted intersection near the public beach. There was no immediate move forward. Instead, Jake turned to her.

“Hey…” he urged softly, smiling as he leaned over, his hand cupping the back of her head. “Come here.”

There was nothing forceful about his voice or his touch. In fact, both were rather pleasantly warm and inviting. Yet, either on instinct or reflex, when his lips met hers Rory lifted her hand to his chest to stop him in place.

“I’m sorry, Jake. I think I should go home.”

His look of blank confusion stayed with her for the entire awkward, silent ride back to her house. She supposed he hadn’t faced a lot of rejection in his life. And Rory wasn’t really sure where it came from, if she was scared by inexperience, or maybe something else. It just didn’t feel right.

As she stood in the driveway watching the car’s taillights disappear into the summer night, this time opening the door all on her own, she knew it would probably be the last time she ever went on a date with Jake Hartwell.

Glancing up to the window, she could see the soft glow from her mother’s bedside lamp. It was just after ten. She still had some time.

She slipped off her flats to head through the backyard, the blades of grass slick and cool under her bare toes. Ducking under the low overhang of the lilac bush, she quickly cut across the two yards, buoyed by the soft rush of the distant sea breeze. When she emerged from the last thicket of hedges, she crouched down to run her fingers over the ground until she found the right sized pebble.

Taking aim from the darkened yard, she grazed it off a pane of glass in the half open upstairs window with a sharp ping. Matt appeared there almost immediately, ducking low.

“One minute, okay?” he called down in hushed tones.

She nodded. When the porch door opened a moment later, he strolled out wearing a cotton ribbed tank and gym shorts slung low on his waist. He took a seat on the top step.

“Hey.”

“Hi,” she greeted him quietly, and hesitated briefly before moving to sit on the step just below him.

“Where were you tonight?” he asked.

“I went to the movies.”

“With who?”

She tilted her head to give him a look that indicated he knew exactly.

“Oh, right.” Matt rested his elbows on his knees and glanced down. “Tonight was the big date.”

Rory allowed her eyes to linger a moment. His thick, dark lashes rested briefly against his cheek. It was a teasing point when they were younger, some guys giving him a hard time about this so-called girlish feature, but Rory was drawn to the way they shadowed and deepened the intense blue of his eyes. Her gaze drifted, following the broad curves of his muscled shoulder and the glimpse of tanned chest. She tightened her fingers into a small fist, suddenly struck with an unexpected urge to touch some of that smooth, soft skin.

“How did that go?”

“We just went to the movies. That was it.”

“Did you like it?” Matt asked, his voice lowering with something undefined. “The movie?”

“It was all right,” she replied.

“You look pretty,” he said.

The comment was so unexpected, unprompted, and so unabashedly sincere, it caused something inside her chest to do a little flip, leaving her momentarily short of breath. Self-consciously, she reached up to tuck her hair behind her ear and realized her hand felt shaky, too.

She immediately tried to deflect the compliment. “What, um…what did you do tonight?”

“What’s the matter?” His smile curved, and it moved through her in a warm rush. “I’m not allowed to tell you that?”

“Whatever, okay?” she said, though now she was smiling too. “I asked what you did tonight.”

“You’re looking at it,” he said. “My dad wouldn’t let me leave the house. He had me cleaning out the shed all the day. It’s supposed to be a scorcher tomorrow, though. We might get a crew together to head out to the island, if you’re up for it. That is, if you’re still allowed to hang out with the likes of me, now that you’re dating some senior guy.”

“If I’m allowed?” Rory regarded him with a dubious grin. “Matt, if there was actually an official ruling to be made on that—you don’t think I actually want to spend time with you, do you?”

He ducked his head with a soft laugh, picking a bud off the flowering shrub by the steps. “Hey, right back at ya.”

“Besides, I’m not even dating him.”

Matt didn’t say anything, didn’t meet her eyes, as he handed her the flower.

Rory twirled it in her fingers. They were both quiet another moment before she asked, “So, what’s going on with you and your dad?”

“Nothing.” He shook his head, dismissing it with a weary sigh. “Same as always. Apparently he just didn’t like my attitude when I woke up this morning.”

“You know, have you ever considered that sometimes you might be a
spoke in the wheel of this cycle?”

“I’m sorry.” He frowned. “My mind is spinning from your circular logic.”

“Anybody in town walks into your dad’s store? They know they’re probably going to hear about two things: what kind of season the Red Sox are having, and how his son Matt, the baseball star, is doing. How he led his summer league team to two consecutive regional championships, made the varsity high school team as a freshman, on and on. You know how proud your dad gets when he’s talking to someone about you, how he likes to brag, just like he did when it came to Danny being the youngest officer out of the academy.” Her small smile faded. “Just not so much when it comes to Kevin, unfortunately.”

Matt only gazed out into the dark distance.

“I’ve watched you looking out for him since the day he started kindergarten,” she continued gently. “You would do anything for him. Maybe even try to play to your father’s lowest expectations, get into these arguments with him, and create this kind of antagonistic relationship as a distraction, to maybe even things out a little around here.”

He cleared his throat, glancing at her as he rested his chin on his arm, but didn’t really meet her eyes.

“You really think that?”

“It kind of sounds like something you would do for someone.” She shifted on the steps and then stood to stretch with some reluctance. “It’s getting to be that time. I should probably head home.”

Matt pushed off to stand as well. “I’ll walk you.”

They took the path rather than the street. At the edge of her yard, he lifted his hand to ease the low branches aside and Rory ducked under his arm before straightening to face him. The ocean breeze caressed her skin, stirring something deep inside as her gaze drifted over his face.

She knew him by heart.

“Matt?”

“Yeah?”

“What you asked me the other day? I guess I wasn’t sure if I wanted him to kiss me—until he did.”

He nodded his head in slight acknowledgement, glancing down.

“And what about now?”

Their voices were so soft and low in the dark, eyes shadowed in moonlight.

“Now? I’d rather wait until I know.”

She glanced back at him when she reached the screen door.

“See you tomorrow?”

“Not if I see you first.”

Rory shook her head in playful reproach, but the smile remained on her face long after she headed in to bed, lingering even as she drifted into dreams.

TWENTY

“Have you tried calling her again?” Kevin asked.

“Yes!” Matt exclaimed in exasperation, still pacing back and forth across his living room floor. “I’ve been calling her all day. She’s not answering her cell, and I’ve left enough messages on her voicemail to make Glenn Close seem sane. The times I’ve tried her house, they just say she’s not home.”

“Well, maybe you just need to give her a little time to let it blow over.”

Matt shot him a dark look. “You really don’t know much about women, do you?” He began to gesture with his hands as if delivering a sermon. “They may let you
think
things have blown over, but they never really do. Oh, no. They say it’s fine, claim all is forgiven, that they’re over it—but what they really mean is that it’s actually still lurking there right under the surface, festering and boiling, waiting to be summoned from those loathsome depths and used against you when you least expect it, just when you thought it was safe to go back in the water!”

Kevin considered this, nodding his head thoughtfully. “You paint a pretty picture of male-female relationships.”

“Oh, there’s nothing pretty about it,” Matt muttered.

“Just to throw something else out there? Did you ever think that maybe, just maybe, if she can’t get past a small misunderstanding? That it’s good to find these things out now, before—”

“Before what?” Matt cut in with a dubious frown.

“Listen, I really like Amanda, you know I do. But I’m just not so sure that—”

Suddenly, the phone on the kitchen counter rang out, interrupting him again.

Matt made a mad dash, scrambling to answer, practically diving onto it as he sent it sliding across the countertop to land with a loud clatter onto the floor. Hopping over the counter in one swift movement, he grabbed it up.

“Hello?” He immediately dropped his head, his voice softening gently, but not without some apprehension. “Hey. I’ve been trying to call you.”