Hamlet (10 page)

GERTRUDE
    Amen.

POLONIUS
    Th’ambassadors from Norway, my good lord,

Are joyfully returned.

KING
    Thou
still
⁴⁵
hast been the father of good news.

POLONIUS
    Have I, my lord? I assure you, my good liege,

I
hold
⁴⁷
my duty, as I hold my soul,

Both to my God and to my gracious king:

And I do think, or else this brain of mine

Hunts not the trail of
policy
⁵⁰
so sure

As I have used to do, that I have found

The very cause of Hamlet’s lunacy.

KING
    O, speak of that: that I do long to hear.

POLONIUS
    Give first admittance to th’ambassadors:

My news shall be the
fruit
⁵⁵
to that great feast.

KING
    Thyself do
grace
⁵⁶
to them and bring them in.—

He tells me, my sweet queen, that he hath found

The head and source of all your son’s
distemper
⁵⁸
.

GERTRUDE
    I
doubt
it is no other but the
main
⁵⁹
:

His father’s death and our o’erhasty marriage.

KING
    Well, we shall
sift him
⁶¹
.— Welcome, good friends.

Say, Voltemand, what from our brother Norway?

VOLTEMAND
    Most fair return of greetings and
desires
⁶³
.

Upon our first
⁶⁴
, he sent out to suppress

His nephew’s levies, which to him appeared

To be a preparation gainst the
Polack
⁶⁶
,

But, better looked into, he truly found

It was against your highness: whereat grieved

That so his sickness, age and
impotence
⁶⁹

Was falsely
borne in hand
, sends out
arrests
⁷⁰

On Fortinbras, which he, in brief, obeys,

Receives rebuke from Norway, and in
fine
⁷²

Makes vow before his uncle never more

To
give th’assay of arms
⁷⁴
against your majesty.

Whereon old Norway, overcome with joy,

Gives him three thousand
crowns
⁷⁶
in annual fee

And his
commission
⁷⁷
to employ those soldiers,

So levied as before, against the Polack,

With an entreaty, herein further shown,

Gives a paper

That it might please you to give
quiet pass
⁸⁰

Through your dominions for his enterprise

On such regards of safety and allowance
⁸²

As therein are set down.

KING
    It
likes
⁸⁴
us well,

And
at our more considered time
⁸⁵
we’ll read,

Answer and think upon this business.

Meantime we thank you for your well-took labour.

Go to your rest: at night we’ll feast together.

Most welcome home!

POLONIUS
    This business is very well ended.

My liege, and madam, to
expostulate
⁹¹

What majesty should be, what duty is,

Why day is day, night night, and time is time,

Were nothing but to waste night, day and time.

Therefore, since brevity is the soul of
wit
⁹⁵
,

And tediousness the limbs and outward flourishes,

I will be brief: your noble son is mad:

Mad call I it,
for, to define true madness
⁹⁸
,

What is’t but to be nothing else but mad?

But let that go—

GERTRUDE
    More matter, with less art.

POLONIUS
    Madam, I swear I use no art at all.

That he is mad, ’tis true: ’tis true ’tis pity,

And pity it is true: a foolish
figure
¹⁰⁴
,

But farewell it, for I will use no art.

Mad let us grant him, then, and now remains

That we find out the cause of this effect,

Or rather say, the cause of this defect,

For
this effect defective comes by cause
¹⁰⁹
.

Thus it remains, and the remainder thus.
Perpend
¹¹⁰
:

I have a daughter — have whilst she is mine —

Who, in her duty and obedience, mark,

Hath given me this: now
gather, and surmise
¹¹³
.

Shows a letter

The letter

Reads

‘To the celestial and my soul’s idol, the most beautified

Ophelia’— That’s an ill phrase, a vile phrase:

‘beautified’ is a vile phrase. But you shall hear these, ‘in her

excellent white bosom’,
these
¹¹⁷
—

GERTRUDE
    Came this from Hamlet to her?

POLONIUS
    Good madam, stay awhile: I will be
faithful
¹¹⁹
.

Reads

   ‘Doubt thou the stars are fire,

   Doubt that the sun doth move,

   
Doubt
¹²²
truth to be a liar,

   But never doubt I love.

O dear Ophelia, I am
ill at these numbers
¹²⁴
: I have not art to

reckon my groans
¹²⁵
; but that I love thee best, O, most best,

believe it. Adieu. Thine evermore, most dear lady, whilst this

machine is to
¹²⁷
him, Hamlet.’

This in obedience hath my daughter showed me,

And
more above
¹²⁹
, hath his solicitings,

As they
fell out
¹³⁰
by time, by means and place,

All given to mine ear.

KING
    But how hath she received his love?

POLONIUS
    What do you think of me?

KING
    As of a man faithful and honourable.

POLONIUS
    I would
fain
¹³⁵
prove so. But what might you think,

When I had seen this hot love on the wing —

As I perceived it, I must tell you that,

Before my daughter told me — what might you,

Or my dear majesty your queen here, think,

If I had
played the desk or table-book
¹⁴⁰
,

Or
given my heart a winking
¹⁴¹
, mute and dumb,

Or looked upon this love
with idle sight
¹⁴²
?

What might you think? No, I went
round
¹⁴³
to work,

And my young mistress thus I did
bespeak
¹⁴⁴
:

‘Lord Hamlet is a prince,
out of thy star
¹⁴⁵
:

This must not be.’ And then I
precepts
¹⁴⁶
gave her

That she should lock herself from his
resort
¹⁴⁷
,

Admit no messengers, receive no tokens:

Which done, she took the fruits of my advice,

And he, repulsèd — a short tale to make —

Fell into a sadness, then into a fast,

Thence to
a watch
¹⁵²
, thence into a weakness,

Thence to a
lightness
, and, by this
declension
¹⁵³

Into the madness whereon now he raves,

And all we wail for.

To Gertrude

KING
    Do you think ’tis this?

GERTRUDE
    It may be, very likely.

POLONIUS
    Hath there been such a time — I’d fain know that —

That I have positively said ‘ ’Tis so’

When it proved otherwise?

KING
    Not that I know.

POLONIUS
    Take this from this, if this be otherwise:

Points to his head and shoulders?

If
circumstances
¹⁶³
lead me, I will find

Where truth is hid, though it were hid indeed

Within the
centre
¹⁶⁵
.

KING
    How may we
try
¹⁶⁶
it further?

POLONIUS
    You know sometimes he walks four hours together

Here in the lobby.

GERTRUDE
    So he does indeed.

POLONIUS
    At such a time I’ll
loose
¹⁷⁰
my daughter to him:

To the King

Be you and I behind an
arras
¹⁷¹
then:

Mark the encounter: if he love her not

And be not from his reason fall’n
thereon
¹⁷³
,

Let me be no
assistant for a state
¹⁷⁴
,

But keep a farm and
carters
¹⁷⁵
.

KING
    We will try it.

GERTRUDE
    But look where
sadly
¹⁷⁷
the poor wretch comes

reading.

POLONIUS
    Away, I do beseech you both away:

I’ll
board
him
presently
. O,
give me leave
¹⁸⁰
.—

How does my good lord Hamlet?

HAMLET
    Well,
God-a-mercy
¹⁸²
.

POLONIUS
    Do you know me, my lord?

HAMLET
    Excellent, excellent well: you’re a
fishmonger
¹⁸⁴
.

POLONIUS
    Not I, my lord.

HAMLET
    Then I would you were so honest a man.

POLONIUS
    Honest, my lord?

HAMLET
    Ay, sir: to be honest, as this world goes, is to be one

man picked out of two thousand.

POLONIUS
    That’s very true, my lord.

HAMLET
    For if the sun breed maggots in a dead dog, being a

good kissing carrion
¹⁹²
— Have you a daughter?

POLONIUS
    I have, my lord.

HAMLET
    Let her not walk
i’th’sun
:
conception
¹⁹⁴
is a blessing,

but not as your daughter may conceive. Friend, look to’t.

POLONIUS
    How say you by that? Still harping on my

daughter: yet he knew me not at first; he said I was a

fishmonger. He is far gone, far gone: and truly in my youth I

suffered much extremity for love, very near this. I’ll speak to

him again.— What do you read, my lord?

HAMLET
    Words, words, words.

POLONIUS
    What is the
matter
²⁰²
, my lord?

HAMLET
    Between who?

POLONIUS
    I mean, the matter that you read, my lord.

HAMLET
    Slanders, sir, for the satirical slave says here that old

men have grey beards, that their faces are wrinkled, their

eyes
purging
thick
amber or plum-tree gum
²⁰⁷
and that they

have a plentiful lack of wit, together with weak
hams
²⁰⁸
: all

which, sir, though I most powerfully and potently believe, yet

I hold it not
honesty
²¹⁰
to have it thus set down, for you

yourself, sir, should be
old
²¹¹
as I am, if like a crab you could go

backward.

Aside

POLONIUS
    Though this be madness, yet there is

method in’t.— Will you walk out of the air, my lord?

HAMLET
    Into my grave?

POLONIUS
    Indeed, that is out o’th’air.—

How
pregnant
sometimes his replies are! A
happiness
²¹⁷
that

often madness hits on, which reason and sanity could not so

prosperously be delivered of. I will leave him and
suddenly
²¹⁹

contrive the means of meeting between him and my

daughter.— My honourable lord, I will most humbly take my

leave of you.

HAMLET
    You cannot, sir, take from me anything that I will

more willingly part
withal
²²⁴
: except my life, my life.

POLONIUS
    Fare you well, my lord.

HAMLET
    These tedious old fools.