Happy Hour (17 page)

Alyssa took his hand, shoved away her own fear at the sight of his. She
quickly realized that Ian needed someone strong to lean on in that moment, and
she was his only option. “Hey, hey. Okay. It’s gonna be okay. I don’t have
other children. I don’t, but of course I’ll be tested. Absolutely.”

Ian—her son—wrapped his arms around her. She held him tight and something
clicked so strong inside her in that moment, something she’d never felt before.
A fierce need to rescue, save,
protect. To protect
this boy. Her boy.

It was a two-for-one Wednesday. Kat was picking up her mother from the
airport at one o’clock and Emily was dropping Amber off that evening. Kat
wasn’t entirely sure how she’d get through the day, but as she did with
everything that went on in her life, she’d make it. It wasn’t that Kat didn’t
love her mother, but the mother she had today was not the mother of yesteryear.
It was the mom of her childhood that she missed and longed for.

Kat’s mom had been the Brownie troop leader for both her and her younger
sister, Tammy, the room parent, the field trip driver and the stay-at-home mom
who made scraped knees better with a swipe of the washcloth and a kiss. Their
home was not anything elaborate, but a nice home in Oakland and it was always
spotless. Mom had been the one to sit and do homework with Tammy and her, drive
them to and fro from dance classes to piano classes. She’d been supermom.

And Dad worked. He was a car salesman and a damn good one. Kat remembered
when he was promoted to the GM position and took her sister, her mother and her
out to the best Chinese restaurant in the city and then to see the Benji movie.
The four of them would watch
Happy Days
and
Laverne & Shirley
together. They had a dog named Spot and a cat named Tiger. They even had a
frigging gold fish that they had named by all putting names in dad’s baseball
cap and randomly selecting one. Mom’s name won. It was Guru.
That
right
there should have been a sign. Kat was eleven at the time and Tammy had been
nine--and Mom had already begun
enlightening
herself. She watched that
yoga woman on PBS every day. She started reading books by Ram Dass and Shirley MacLaine—who
quickly became her idol. But she didn’t do much more than that until Kat was
out of the house, married to the Sperm Donor and involved with two babies.

Then it happened.

One day, Kat’s mother packed up, gave her dad a hug, thanking him for
loving her and providing for her for all those years, but informing him that
she needed more.
More
! Her mother needed more what? Oh, lest it be
forgotten that by this point Dad had owned his own lucrative dealership. Mom
had enjoyed all the luxuries that go along with a little money in the bank.
Things like cruises, designer clothes, nips and tucks in sagging areas, and a
lot of relaxation. As far as Kat had been concerned, the
more
that her
mother needed shouldn’t have had anything to do with “broadening the soul’s
horizons,” but
more
of visiting her grandchildren, for starters. That
would have worked out well, and filled her up. Grandmas do grandma things. They
don’t move to ashrams, become yoga instructors, and name themselves after a
fucking planet.

But, no!
Her
mom left behind
her
father, who quickly turned
into a shell of a man and it was only recently that he’d begun to live again.
She’d also served Kat’s sister, Tammy, up on a silver platter to Kat. Tammy had
some issues. Actually quite a few.

Kat’s sister had not been able to escape the clutches of painkillers. At
twenty, Tammy had been in a serious car accident while driving around late at
night with another addiction—bad boys. She’d broken her pelvis and back. Those
hours, days, and weeks in the hospital spent watching her baby sister suffer
were memories Kat loathed. But it was the days after Tammy went home, went
through painful physical therapy and emotional upheaval that Vicodin, Percocet
and Darvocet became her sister’s best friends. And as Tammy’s best friends
began to control her life, Mom looked more and more to her New Age wisdom,
turning a blind eye to Tammy’s problems. And Dad became the consummate
co-dependent. He provided Tammy with money, a place to live, clothes, a car,
food, medical insurance—whatever she needed. Kat’s dad was a good man.

The times spent with her dad were some of the best times in Kat’s life.
They would see a movie together once a month. As kids, he would take her and
her sister to this old school diner for breakfast every Saturday morning before
he set out to the dealership. If he would get home in time before they’d gone
to bed, he’d always come into their bedroom and tuck them in, kiss them good
night, and tell them stories.

Kat wondered if Dad knew that her mom would be in town for the summer.
She should tell him, just in case they ran into each other. Dad had uprooted
when Kat had moved with the boys and Christian to Napa, just as Christian’s ex
had. Apparently everyone had decided Napa was nicer than Oakland. Yeah. No-brainer
there.

She was not sure how her father would react to the news, but she probably
owed it to him. Her fingers crossed, she hoped this wouldn’t throw him off
kilter. Mom had gone off the deep end and lost herself in incense and mantras,
but Dad on the other hand, had actually found himself.

“Hi, Mom,” Brian came into the kitchen interrupting her thoughts down
memory lane, and headed directly to the fridge where he opened the carton of
milk.

Before he got the carton all the way up to his lips, Kat cut in. “Do not
even think about it if you want to live another day. Use a glass.”

He frowned and went to the cupboard. “Grandma coming today, huh?”

“Yep. I have to head out in a bit to go get her. Hey, why don’t you come
with me? We haven’t hung out for a while. I miss you.” More and more, Brian had
been
hanging
(his word) with his dad. School was out for the summer and
between Dad time and his video game addiction, Kat hardly saw her younger son.

“I can’t. Dad and I are going to play tennis and then see a movie. Take
Jeremy.”

“Jeremy is over at Guy’s house. They’ve each got a few more volunteer
hours to do for their required senior year community service. Guy’s mom
arranged for them to work down at the shelter for the afternoon, which by the
way, you should get a jump on. Don’t wait until right before your senior year
to cram in sixty hours of service.”

“I know.” He nodded.

Kat doubted he’d heard a word she said. “But Bri, you’ve spent a lot of
time with Dad lately and I’d like someone to drive with me, and I’d like it to
be you. We always used to talk and joke and it’ll be fun. We can get burgers on
the way. Your grandma would be so happy to see you. Come on. You can go play
tennis with your dad another day.”

Brian gulped down his milk and turned to his mom. “What is it with you?”

“Excuse me?”

“Yeah. You have a problem with Dad.”

“I don’t have a problem with your father.”

“Whatever.” Brian started to walk out of the kitchen.

“Brian Patrick! Come back here.”

She heard the aggrieved sigh down the hallway. “What, Mom?”

“Get in here. You can’t say something like that to me and then walk away.
I think this is something we should talk about. But first, you need to change
your tone with me.”

“What tone?” He walked back into the kitchen and grabbed an apple from
the fruit bowl.

“That one.” She pointed at him. “That smartass sarcastic tone, like you
think you own the world and I am only here as one of your many servants.”

He stared at her like she was crazy.

“What do you mean I have a problem with your father?”

He sighed again. “Like every time I make plans with him, you get all
weird.”

“I do not.”

He nodded. “You do, Mom. You kind of freak out.”

“Actually I never say a word about it. I should, considering that neither
your father nor you, for that matter, seem to have any consideration that we
have a schedule set up. So far this summer it seems it’s been all too laissez-faire
and I haven’t pressed the issue.”

“Yeah, cuz I’m old enough to make those decisions.”

“Who told you that?”

“Dad. He said that since I’m fourteen I can decide who I want to live
with even.”

The heat rose to Kat’s neck. Blood rushed through her ears and every
nerve set on edge, but instead of blowing up she took a deep breath. “That’s
not entirely true, Bri. It really isn’t. Family courts make those decisions and
that decision has been made. You live here and you visit your dad.”

“You know that Dad still loves you.” Brian took a large bite out of the
apple.

Kat closed her eyes and sighed. Wasn’t he too old for this? Sure, kids
always wanted their parents back together, but she and Perry had been divorced
for almost five years. “No, he doesn’t, sweetie. I mean not in the way that you
think.”
How does one negotiate these waters?
“Sure, as a friend.”
There
was a blatant lie
. “But honey, your daddy does not love me anymore and I
don’t love him.” Brian frowned. “I mean I love him for giving me two of the
best gifts in the world—you and your brother, but that’s it. I’m sorry.”

“Whatever. But Dad does love you. He told me so himself. He says that
you’re the best thing that ever happened to him, and he’s sorry he ever hurt
you, and he totally takes the blame, and if he ever had another chance…”

Kat held up her hand. “Bri, there isn’t going to be another chance with
your dad. I loved him once. I love him for you guys and that’s it. I’m married
to Christian now and that’s who I love.”

Brian looked down. Kat placed a hand under his chin and lifted it to look
at her. “I’m sorry, baby. I am.”

He sucked back his breath and nodded, his eyes watering with a combined
look of sadness, anger, and fear. Divorce stuck forever. In fact, the word
divorce alone should be defined as an emotion and not a thing that happens to
people. It was this constant emotion that dulls for some, but it was ever present
for others. Kat could see that for her youngest son, that this emotion took
front and center in his heart and mind regularly. And God, if she didn’t ache
in return because of his pain. If she could only take it away, eat up the
darkness for him, and rid him of it.

“Whatever, Mom.”

“Go with me today. Please. We can talk some more. Instead of burgers,
let’s stop off for dessert lunch. Remember when we used to do that when you
were little? When we had mental health days?”

That got a smile out of him. When the boys had been younger there was the
occasional school day that she would denote as mental health day. Instead of
school and nutritious meals, the day was all about sleeping in, eating junk,
and having whatever dessert their hearts desired for lunch. For Brian, it was
usually a hot fudge Sunday. “Hot fudge… You know you want to.” She wiggled her
eyebrows at him.

But before Brian had a chance to answer, the doorbell rang. Kat made it
to the door ahead of him, ready to go on attack, knowing that it was Perry.
“Hey, Kit-Kat. The kid ready? We’re cruising out to play some tennis, and…”

Kat stepped out front of the door and shut it behind her. “I know your
plan, but I want to tell you something…”

Just as Kat started into her tirade, Brian opened the door. “Hey, Dad.
I’m ready.”

Perry slapped him on the shoulder. “Good deal, bud. I’m gonna squash you
on the court.”

“Right.” Brian smiled and his face lit up. Kat failed to do that these
days—light up her child.

Perry turned back to Kat and smiled. “You were saying.”

She smiled back. “We need to talk.”

He winked at her. “Anytime, Kit-Kat.  Anytime. Let’s go, man. Knock some
balls around.”

Brian turned back and waved weakly at his mom. “I’ll be home by dinner,
okay? Maybe we could do dessert lunch tomorrow. Love you.”

“I love you, too.” She swallowed back the hurt, sucking it deep down. As
she went to shut the front door, another unannounced, unwelcome guest pulled
into her driveway.

Emily
.

Kat pulled herself together and watched in horror and amazement as the woman
went around to the back of the car, took Amber by the hand, grabbed two pink
Polly Pocket suitcases, and practically dragged the child to the front door.
“Good, I’m glad you’re home.”

“Hi, Emily. Um, I thought you were coming by tonight.”

Emily stood up straight, tucked her long brunette hair behind her ears,
and straightened her khaki skirt. “Our schedule has changed. The movers came
early and I really need to be there with them, without any disturbances.” She
glanced down at Amber, who looked like she’d been crying and was ready to start
again. “Here are her things and I won’t be able to get back this weekend, but
next weekend we’ll pick her up on Friday. I’ll call Christian with the
details.” She bent down and pulled Amber into her. “You be a good girl for your
daddy and Kat. Mommy loves you.” With that, she turned on her loafers and
headed back to her convertible.

Kat looked down at Amber, who was now sucking her thumb and watching
(most likely in terror) her mother leave. Kat took her by the hand and opened
the front door. They could get her suitcases later. The last thing this child
needed to see was her mother pulling away as she abandoned her, which was
exactly what the self-centered bitch was doing. “Hey, sweetie, have you ever
had a dessert lunch?”

Amber shook her head.

“Well, today you’re going to, and it’ll be the best lunch of your life. I
promise.” Kat stooped down, picked Amber up and twirled her around. “Did you
hear me? Do you hear what I am saying? Dessert lunch! It’s crazy. It’s wild and
it’s gonna be the best!”

Amber giggled and so did Kat.