Hard Corps (Selected Sinners MC #7) (15 page)

“You see; special needs are nothing more than
that
. He has needs that are special. It doesn’t mean he isn’t deserving of anything and everything that every other person on this earth is deserving of. It only means he has a few needs unique to him – and they’re described as special.
Special.
You know the definition of special?” I asked as I released my grasp and pushed him to the side.

He stood with swollen tear-filled eyes and stared.

“Better or more important than others,” I said as I pushed the knife into the pocket of my jeans.

Without speaking, he began to softly cry.

“I didn’t mean a word I said about your child, Dekk. I was making a point, you need to know that,” I said.

He nodded his head.

“Now, you know what we’re gonna do?” I asked as I patted him on the shoulder.

“We’re going to get on our sleds and ride to Austin. You’re going to apologize to Kace, Ripp, Vee, Austin, the old man, and everyone else who’s been worried about you. I could give two shits whether or not you’re going to fight for the championship, makes no difference to me. But you’re going to support Kace through this. And the day will come when your little boy will be born. And every fucking one of us will love him – because he’s part of you, and he’s part of Kace. Now, you ready to ride or you want me to wad you up into another ball and cut you this time?” I asked as I bent down and picked up the cigarette butt.

“A-Train?” he asked.

I stood and shoved the cigarette into my pocket. “What is it, Brother?”

“I’m scared,” he said.

I nodded my head. “Been there plenty of times, Dekk. Generally, I’ll ask the man upstairs for spoon full of courage.”

He bit into his lower lip and nodded his head.

“You know what? He hasn’t let me down yet,” I said as I wrapped my arms around him.

I held him in my arms until he finally stopped crying.

After I released him he gazed down at the ground for a long moment. While clearing his throat, he glanced up with swollen eyes.

“Let’s ride,” he said.

“You lead the way, Brother,” I said. “I’ve got your back.”

And, little did he know it, but I had the back of his unborn son, too.

CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE

Fall 2014, Austin, Texas, USA

The soon to be births of the children of my best friends put a damper on the feeling of necessity to start a new chapter for our motorcycle club. Although Shane, Ripp, and I enjoyed riding our motorcycles together, I felt no real desire or benefit in devoting any amount of time to the idea.

In recent months I was happier than I could ever remember being. I was slowly seeing a side of myself I had never seen, and was quite pleased with the transformation. Still much the Marine I had always been, I was evolving nonetheless into a man with different desires, feelings, and hopes.

I realized my former relationship was not necessarily a relationship at all – only a person to unwind with after each deployment. My entire adult life had been spent at war, and my time with Suzanne had been roughly one month a year – most of which I spent recovering from the horrors of battle.

Now spending time with a woman for all of the right reasons, life seemed so much different. Sitting at the bar with Shane and Ripp, however, reminded me some things were likely to never change.

“I can’t fuckin’ wait for this kid, Dekk. I been goin’ to the store, and when I go, I’m eyballin’ the aisles with kid shit in ‘em instead of the aisles with guns and fishin’ poles. Who’d a thought that?” Ripp said as he tipped up his bottle of beer.

Dekk shrugged his shoulders and grinned. “Not me.”

“Hell, Ripp, I might be more excited about these two kids than both of you combined. I’m fucking giddy,” I said.

Ripp wrinkled his nose and lowered his bottle of beer. “Giddy?”

“That’s what I said,” I said.

He shook his head, glanced at Dekk as if seeking support, and upon getting nothing in return, turned to face me. “High school girls are giddy.”

I cocked my head to the side and widened my eyes. “Add me to the list.”

“You alright, Bro?” he asked.

“Quite,” I said.

“Sister of mine’s got you all fucked up. Shit before long you two’ll have a kid of your own,” he said.

“Not yet,” I said.

“Better be careful. Knock her up and Pop’ll make you get married,” he said.

“Don’t have to worry about that,” I said as I reached for my bottle of beer.

“Ain’t shootin’ blanks, are ya?” he asked.

I coughed a laugh. “No, as far as I know my ammunition’s fine. We’d have to have sex first. That’s what I meant.”

He leaned forward and pressed his forearms onto the edge of the table. As he fixed his eyes on mine, he cocked one eyebrow and cleared his throat. “Couple a months and you two ain’t fuckin’?”

Normally such a question would have been rewarded with an escorted trip to the parking lot or a punch in the face. As Katie was his sister, and he really meant no disrespect, I decided I would allow it.

“Listen. Most men ask questions after a guy dates a girl for a while like have you fucked her yet? Or is she good pussy? I don’t ask those questions, and I don’t appreciate them asked of me. Those things aren’t my reason for being with her. If they’re meant to be, they’ll happen. If they’re not, they won’t. But when they do,” I paused and reached for my beer.

I took a long drink, placed the bottle to the side, and leaned onto the edge of the table. As he met my gaze, I locked eyes with him.

“It’ll be between Katie and me,” I said.

After a few seconds of our eyes being locked, he leaned back in his seat and grinned. “Fair enough. It’s nice knowing you ain’t takin’ advantage of my sis.”

I nodded once and reached for my beer.

Ripp twisted in his seat for a moment as if uncomfortable, drank the rest of his beer, and leaned forward, resting his elbows on the edge of the table. As he rubbed his hands together, he fixed his eyes on mine.

“What?” I asked.

“You whack off all the time, don’t you?” he asked.

Dekk choked on his turkey sandwich and I let out a long belly laugh.

“No, actually I don’t,” I said.

“Shit. I whack off while I’m getttin’ ready to have sex. Sometimes after,” he said as he leaned into the back of his seat.

“Good to know,” I said with a laugh.

“You know why I like it so much?” he asked as he pointed at Dekk. “Don’t answer, Dekk. Dekk knows, and I don’t want him spoilin’ it.”

“Wasn’t planning on it,” Dekk said.

There wasn’t anything to spoil. I didn’t give a half-ounce of fucks why he whacked off as much as he did. But, as much as I fought against it, my mouth curled into a smile. “Why?”

“Because the whole fuckin’ time, I’m in control. Speed. Passion. All of it,” he said.

Passionate masturbation?

I stared at him in disbelief. “Passion?”

“Yep,” he said as he waved his hand at the waitress. “I can make it rough sex, passionate, slow and easy, fast and light, fast and rough, hell the possibilities are endless.”

I shook my head and laughed. “Well, I choose to exercise more control than that. Keeps me strong, alert, and more passionate about relationships.”

He tossed his head toward Shane. “Sound like Dekk, now. He ain’t much for whackin’ off either.”

“What can I get for you?” the waitress asked.

“Two things,” Ripp responded. “Bring us a glass of water, and two more beers.”

“Is that it?” she asked.

“No,” Ripp said. “I said there was two, that’s one. Here’s the other. I got a question.”

She placed her hand on her hip and glanced at each of us individually. “Okay.”

“Who here has the most self-control?” he asked.

Without shifting her eyes away from him, she responded. “Those two. Probably a dead tie. My guess is you’ve got none.”

“Seriously?” he asked.

“Yeah, seriously,” she responded. “Is that it?”

“Yeah,” he said. “That’s it.”

“Sharp girl,” I said.

“Is it that obvious?” he asked.

“Just as well have it tattooed on your forehead,” Dekk said.

Ripp shifted his focus to Dekk, and glared. “Shut it, Dekk. You ain’t got that much self-control. You beat the fuck out of people for a living.”

“So do you,” Dekk responded.

Sitting at the bar with Ripp and Shane wasn’t much different than being at Sunday dinner. It was anyone’s guess what the topic of discussion would be, and there was never a doubt that Ripp would be the center of attention. He didn’t do it out of necessity or desire, it was just that he was a very outspoken person with very little tact.

“Whatever, Dekk,” Ripp said with a wave of his hand.

“Back to the original subject,” I said. “I’m pretty excited about this kid thing. And if anybody needs a babysitter, I’m your guy.”

“No shit?” Ripp said.

I nodded my head. “I’m serious. I love kids.”

“Know anything about ‘em?” he asked.

“Damn bit more than you, if I was forced to guess,” I said with a laugh.

“Ain’t never had any though, huh?” he asked.

I shook my head. “No, not yet.”

“Got any nephews or nieces?” he asked.

I had never been a man to lie, and now wasn’t the time to start. In some respects, I led myself into the question and needed to answer it, but I sat staring at my bottle of beer trying to decide just how to answer it without answering it in full.

“My sister had a little boy. I haven’t seen him in years,” I said.

“Must not like ‘em too much,” he said.

Now I have to answer….

“Actually, I do. She put him up for adoption. I don’t have any right to see him any longer.” I said. “Long story.”

It wasn’t a subject I liked to discuss with anyone, and it was the reason I hadn’t spoken to my father – or my sister – in so many years. In front of Shane, who I had already shared my nephew being a special needs child, I hated to bring up the subject. Although we hadn’t discussed the matter since I went to New Mexico and brought him home, I could only guess that he still struggled with the subject.

“Sorry to hear it, Brother,” Ripp said.

“Not as sorry as I am to say it,” I said. “It makes me sick.”

And truer words had never been spoken.

CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX

Early Winter 2014, Austin, Texas, USA

Life, at least for me, had always been full of surprises. To say that things happen when they’re least expected would be the understatement of a lifetime. Although Vee was further along than Kace in her pregnancy, Kace gave birth first, a little prematurely. I received a text message and multiple calls from both Shane and Ripp, but I was out for a ride on my motorcycle and didn’t see them until I stopped for gas.

The ninety miles I rode from south of the city passed in less than an hour, and I came to a screeching halt beside the entrance of the hospital. After parking my motorcycle on the edge of sidewalk leading to the hospital, I rushed through the door and to the receptionist desk.

“Dekkar. Childbirth, they’ve moved them. I need the room number, please,” I said.

“Spell the name,” she receptionist said.

“D. E. K. K. A. R. Dekkar,” I said excitedly.

She pecked at the keys, stared at the monitor, and glanced up. “Room 724. Down the hall, on the elevator on the left, and up to seven. It’s on the right.”

“Do you have a flower shop?” I asked.

“Right down the hall, on the way to the elevator. Third door on the left,” she said.

I chose the perfect bouquet of flowers and ran down the hall to the elevator. As the door opened on the seventh floor, I clutched the flowers, gazed down at the toes of my boots, and exhaled. I calmly walked down the hallway, glancing at each of the numbers until I reached their room.

724.

I rubbed the palms of my hands against the thighs of my jeans and took a deep breath. On the other side of the door I could hear Ripp’s voice over everything else. Another deep breath, and I pushed the door open.

“Uncle A-Train is here,” I whispered as I walked into the room.

Kace’s hair was an absolute mess, and she looked exhausted. Shane looked equally worn out, but was smiling from ear to ear. Ripp, dressed in his typical shorts, wife beater, and Chucks despite the fact it was winter, and Vee was wearing cotton pregnancy pants, a cute black top, and flats.

As I walked into the room, Kace’s eyes shifted to the flowers I held, and she forced a slight smile as she tried to sit up.

“These are for you,” I said as I leaned over the edge of the bed and kissed her cheek.

I placed the vase of flowers on the table beside the bed.

“Fellas,” I said as I nodded my head toward Shane and Ripp.

“Congratulations,” I said as I shook Shane’s hand.

“Thank you,” he said.

I did my best to contain my excitement, but it didn’t last long. Beside the far side of the bed a bassinet sat with a heat lamp over it. I craned my neck and did my best to peer inside, but from the end of the bed I could see nothing.

I tossed my head toward the side of the bed as I edged my way past Ripp. “Can I hold…” 

My throat constricted and my mouth went completely dry. It was much tougher than I imagined it would be. I wedged myself between the edge of the bed and the small bed the baby was sleeping in. I glanced at Shane, shifted my eyes toward Kace, and met her gaze. She nodded her head and grinned.

I peered into the bassinet.

Innocently sleeping and undoubtedly developing into a man with each passing second, he was much smaller than I remembered my first nephew being. After admiring him for a few seconds, my eyes began to well with tears.

“Don’t worry, Alec. You won’t break him,” I heard Kace say from behind me.

I turned away from the bassinet and faced the bathroom. “My hands. I need to wash my hands.”

I walked into the bathroom, closed the door, and stared down at my boots as I washed my hands. After more than a decade of experiencing my fair share of death, embracing a new life being introduced to the earth was almost more than I could stand to witness. I dried my hands, inhaled a shallow breath, and stared blankly into the mirror. I couldn’t let this nephew escape me.

You keep him healthy, Lord, and I’ll keep him safe.

I reached for the door, pulled it open, and paused.

Thank you.

“Good to go,” I said as I raised my hands in the air.

I quietly walked to the bassinet, reached inside, and carefully picked up my nephew.

Ripp continued to tell a story, Shane argued about the size of the man Ripp had challenged to a fight, and Kace quietly laughed.

For me, the room fell silent.

I gazed down at the child cradled in my arms and couldn’t help but smile. A new life. Another chance for someone to grow into the next person to make a difference on earth. Potentially the future President of the United States, a doctor who may cure cancer, or possibly the man who just might convince the world to live in peace.

I turned away from the crowd, began to hum him a tune, and allowed a tear to roll down my cheek.

And for that moment, as I held my sleeping nephew in my arms, nothing else mattered.