Healer (The Healer Series) (14 page)

I stand up and look
around my apartment for my red boots. I find them sitting on the other side of my bed so I quickly bend over and slide them on. As I do, my shirt rises up, exposing my behind wearing nothing but a thong.

“O
h my God, please put some clothes on,” Thomas begs. I eye him for a moment. Has he changed? Why is he being so distant?

“What the fuck
, Thomas?” I yell back.

His jaw drops
.

“I’m not going anywhere with
you. I spend years looking for you, thinking you’re dead and then I find you, only to have you act like a dick to me.”

“Aldo, I know. Please
get dressed. You’re killing me,” he sighs, turning his head away from me.

“Why did you leave us?”
I begin to sob again. He’s alive. I found him. Then it occurs to me—
he’s alive
. He’s been alive this entire time and hasn’t entered my dreams once.

“I had to.” He still doesn’t look at me.

So many emotions run through me. I hate him. I love him. I want him. I want to run away from him.

But only one wins over.

I want him.

I want the gratifica
tion of feeling him once more, connected to me, making love to me. Not in my dreams, but for real. I deserve that. It’s the one thought that has kept me honest to him all of these years. I have loved no other nor let another love me. He is it. I walk toward him as I release my long hair from its tie. I shake my hair down, running my hands through it to tame it.

He looks at me
.

To coin another Lucy Lawson ode of wisdom, although I’m sure she’d have an aneurism if she ever thought I used it in this instance, you catch more flies with honey than vinegar.

My body is honey….

I slowly peel my off my shirt
, leaving nothing, but my black lace thong and red cowboy boots. My confidence is unwavering now. I’ve come too far to feel self-conscious or embarrassed.

He turns towards me as I walk around
the counter where he stands looking as if he is about to be pounced on by a wild animal. He backs away a bit, as if scared to get too close.

In the light
, the gleam in his gorgeous eyes makes my knees weak. His eyes are darker somehow, but I see so much more in them than when I was just a girl. Mostly, I see home. I see a time when Lucy was alive, my brothers were close by, and the only care I had in the world was whether I’d die and never know what it would be like to kiss Thomas. I feel like that seventeen year old girl at the restaurant again, but I’m not. I’m a woman. I’m not scared or afraid to show him that. I convince myself if I show him I’m not some young thing that needs to be coddled, he’ll relax. I grab his shirt and pull him to me. He stiffens. I rise up on my toes and gently lick his upper lip with the tip of my tongue, raising my eyes to meet his.

“Aldo, I
—”

“No
. We can and we will.” I run my hands down his chest. His body is not exactly as I remember it, but it’s still firm, and I remind myself that this is not a dream. My hands are actually touching him for real. “I don’t know what’s happened or what will happen, but I know right now I’m not dreaming and I am going to have this.” I grab his shirt near the collar and rip it open.

His eyes widen,
stunned by this move. “We have to leave.” He insists, still frozen.

“We will, but I need you first. I need to know you still love me. Do you still love me?”
I kiss his chest gently as I run my hands down his obliques.

“A
ldo, you don’t under—”

“Don’t answer,
” I whisper quickly. “Just give me this, and if you don’t want me afterwards I’ll leave. I just have to have you.” A tear slides down my cheek. I know it could never be that simple.

He pulls my chin up and gazes into my eyes.
“We can’t do this.” He whispers gently, trying to keep me from becoming hysterical.

Suddenly
, I feel a sharp pain shoot through my head as the apartment starts to shake, but the pain vanishes quickly. The sound of my candle in the bathroom crashing to the ground makes me jump.

Thomas grips my arm
, his eyes wide as he looks around until it stops. He eyes me cautiously.

“Was
that an earthquake?” I ask panicked, pulling myself into him as if his body will protect me against a natural disaster.

“Must have been.”
He stands completely still.

I look around the apartment, but nothing seems to be damaged.

“Thomas.” I stare up at him, not deterred by even an earthquake. He looks down at me and I see confusion in his eyes. I know he is torn. He’s fighting what he wants to do versus what he should do.

“
I can’t do this, Aldo.”

“Yes you can.” I kiss his cheek.
“Thomas, if you don’t do this, I will shrivel up and die.”

He stares back at me
, and sadness spreads across his face. “Do you really mean that?”

“For five years I have been looking for you. I’ve been so lost
without you.” Tears run down my face. He runs his finger across my cheek and kisses my lips softly. He stands back and eyes me. Kissing him is not as I remember, but this is real and not in my dreams. He steps away from me again, fighting the temptation.

I follow
and press my body against him as I caress his firm chest with soft kisses, but he stands still as a statue, offering no encouragement. I fumble at his belt, trying to unbuckle it.

“Aldo,
you—”

“
Shhh.” I stop him. I finally get his belt undone and unbutton his pants. I slide my hand down and stroke his erection.

He gasps, then
grabs my hand and pulls it out. “We don’t have time for this.” He fumbles with his belt, trying to buckle it.

“Yes
, we do.” I grab his hands and fight him for control of his belt buckle. Finally, I take his hand and kiss his palm before placing it on my breast.

He inhales deeply.

“Don’t you want me?” A flash back of the night I pushed myself on him in my dreams races though my mind.

“Yes.
I mean, no. I mean...” He pulls away from me, but this time makes distance. “Get dressed.” He walks into the bathroom and shuts the door.

Past

By the time my brothers got me to Maela, I was in agony. No one ever told me contractions would feel like my worst menstrual cramp magnified by infinity. I was soaked from the waist down and in the worst pain I had ever experienced in my life.

“This may not be a good time, but I hope you know you’re cleaning the upholstery
in the car after were done here,” Whit joked, trying to make me laugh.

I
glared at him.

Maela
, my illegal immigrant, non-English speaking, mid-wife, spoke to Hudson in her native tongue, and indicated for my brothers to take me into her labor room. Two young girls, who I assumed were Maela’s granddaughters, hurriedly lay clean sheets across a small bed with a cherry stained wooden head board.

My brothers
lay me on the bed, and Hudson spoke to Maela. I assumed he was asking her what was going to happen next.

Maela
grabbed Hudson’s hand and smiled, reassuring him, I thought. Whit kneeled beside me, holding my hand as I squeezed his, suffering my way through a contraction. When I looked up I saw Maela trying to shoo Whit and Hudson out of the room.

T
hey both looked at each other. Hudson spoke to her again, but her response was to shoo him. “She wants to undress you, Aldo, but we’ll come back afterwards,” Hudson reassured me.

“Okay,
” I managed, through clenched teeth as another contraction seized my body and I moaned in agony.

“We’re right out here
.” Whit squeezed my hand and left.

Maela
smiled softly at me, a toothless smile for the most part, before she barked orders to the young girls, and they helped me undress while I lay on the small bed. Maela gave me a white gown to wear while one of the young girls brought me a cool wash cloth, and the other propped pillows behind my back. Maela brought in a large white bowl with water and several folded towels and laid them on a table beside the foot of the bed. One of the young girls lay a white sheet across my lower body. Maela gently grabbed my legs and positioned them so my knees were up, but my legs were spread apart. She spoke to me in her native tongue and motioned with her hands.

I nodded
like an idiot, even though I had no idea what she said. One of the young girls handed her a pair of latex gloves, which I appreciated given that she was no doctor and we were in the back room of a shack in the slums. Maela quickly put them on and raised the sheet. After a brief moment, her fingers probed inside me.

A
nother contraction seized me and I groaned loudly. Now about two minutes apart, they continued to get worse and worse. One of the downsides to having a baby in a Cuban shack in Little Havana was no epidural.

Maela
yelled to the girls, and one ran out of the room bringing Hudson back in with her. Maela spoke to Hudson with great emphasis motioning with her hands.

Hudson looked at me
, worry in his eyes. Whit came in and waited for Hudson to say something.

“The baby is breach. She’s worried that you may not be able to deliver naturally.”

“Breach? What does that mean?” I asked, panicked.

“Seriously
, Aldo! You didn’t read any of the books we bought, did you?” Hudson scolded, his lips pursed in disappointment.

“What does it mean?” I yelled back in a voice that must have made me sound possessed because Hudson seemed surprised.

“It means the baby is coming out feet first,” Whit answered in a calm voice.

“That’s bad?” I asked like an idiot.

“Can be,” Whit shook his head.

“You
read those books too, huh?” Another contraction hit me like a ton of bricks and I moaned.

“
I bought one with cliff notes.” He winked, and I smiled through the pain. “Hudson, ask her if she can deliver the baby?”

Hudson and
Maela shared a short dialogue, and then she sat back down between my legs and inserted her fingers again. She spoke something and the pretty, young Cuban girls came on either side of me and grabbed my knees while Whit and Hudson grabbed my hands.

“She said push like hell.” Hudson
nodded, squeezing my hand.

Fear raptured my body.
Holy shit. I’m about to have a baby, and it really fucking hurts
. Sweat dripped down my face and chest. My mind filled with rantings.
I hate sex! I hate vaginas! I hate little Cuban shithole shacks with no air conditioning!

Hudson quickly grabbed the washcloth that had fallen to my side and wiped my forehead.

“Thank you,” I sighed in exhaustion.

“You are really go
ing to need a shower after this,” Hudson noted.

“
Ya think?”

“Hey, you got this
,” Whit assured me while trying to stifle his laugh.

“Does my immense
, fucking pain humor you, Whit?” I snarled.

“A
little,” he laughed. “Sorry, Aldo, it’s just a weird situation, and you are very rarely in this form. Come on, I’m ready to meet my niece or nephew.” Whit nodded with a
let’s get ‘er done
expression.

“Now push
, Aldo!” Hudson cheered.

.

twelve

Present

“What happened
, Thomas?” I ask when he finally emerges from the bathroom. I stand mostly naked, leaned over my kitchen counter.  Aggravation plagues his face when he realizes I’m still not dressed.

“Get dressed. I’ll tell you on the way.”

“Where are we going?”

“I’m getting you out of here.” He turns away from me as if he felt inappropriate seeing me naked. “For the love of everything that is good and holy, please get dressed,” he begs again when I don’t move.

I smile
, enjoying the thought of torturing him. I wrap my arms around him, my chest pressed against his bare back. I found him. He’s alive. Now I can tell him he’s a father. I can share with him that we created another creature, a beautiful human being.

“Dressed,
now!” He interrupts my thoughts. “We have to go.” He peels my arms from around him and walks towards my closet.

His rejection feels like a knife in my heart and every time I push and he continues to reject me, it feels as if he’s twisting that knife. I always envisioned that if I found Thomas, he would embrace me and never let me go.

“Do you have a shirt th
at will fit me?” He stares into my closet.

S
till in nothing but my thong and red boots, I join him at the closet and arch my back so that my breasts are raised as I slide by him.

He backs away from me
as I move hangers around. I find a large green t-shirt and stare at it. I didn’t even know I had this. “Will this work?” I hold it up to him.

“Yes.” He takes it out of my hand without even looking at it.
What was happening? Why was he being so cruel? He faces away from me while I dress, his head hanging as if playing out some inner turmoil.

I watch
him as I put on new underwear and a lacey black bra. I slip on a black tank top with a jean skirt. I gather up my pre-paid cell phone, some cash hidden in a shoe box in the back of my closet for emergencies, some underwear, and a few clean tank tops. I stuff them into a leather satchel. I grab some of my makeup and shove it into the front pocket after applying my lip gloss. My heart is racing with joy at the thought of leaving with Thomas. Going home to my brothers and being with our child is too much to imagine. He must be worried about someone taking us. That has to be why he’s so tense. Once we get out of here and are on our way he’ll relax. We’ll finally be together. In my immense joy, a sad thought comes to mind: Alina. I have to see her. I have to say goodbye.

“Thomas, I have to work. One last shift and
then I’ll go where ever with you.”

“
No.” He still won’t look at me.

“Yes, I’m going,
” I reply firmly. “I need to say goodbye to someone. It’s just one night. You can sit at the bar and wait for me.”

“I don’t
want to watch you strip.” He shakes his head.

“Then don’t come, but I’m
going.”

“Pleas
e just listen to me,” he begs softly, and I can’t help but bend to his whim.

“Fine,
” I exhale loudly. I can come back later to find Alina once I figure out what Thomas is so worked up about.

“Ready,
” I sigh as I gaze at my apartment for what might be the last time. Can’t say I’ll miss it, but I certainly won’t forget it. This will be the end of my long journey. Thomas and I will find my brothers and he will meet his…

“Let’s go.” He interrupts my train of thought.

At the ground floor, Thomas glances out the door, checking to see if anyone is watching. He pulls me behind him and opens the passenger door to a black SUV of some sort that’s parked on the side of my building. We climb in the car, he starts the engine, and sets off for the interstate.

“Where are we going?”
Why is he going in this direction?

“The bus depot.”

“Why are we taking a bus?”

“We aren’t,” h
e replies curtly.

I
try to understand what is happening. Then it occurs to me. He means
I’m taking the bus.

“No
, Thomas. I’m not leaving.” I turn to him.

“Yes
, you are.” He nods and still stares forward.

“Not without you!” I shout
.

“You have to. They
found you. You have to go so I can distract them and get them off of your trail.”

“
No, we’ll leave together. We can lose them together,” I demand, grabbing his arm as if this will convince him.

“Aldo, you don’t understand.”
He shakes off my hand.

“Then explain it to me.”

He is quiet for the remainder of the drive, despite my pleading for him to talk. When we finally reach the bus depot, he parks the car and turns to me. “Aldo, you won’t want to be with me when you find out the truth.” He runs his hands through his hair, and I can see the years we have been apart have been hard for him. He’s thirty now, not the strapping young man I fell head over heels for, but an older version of a young man, with worries that have worn him down. My Thomas is still handsome as ever, in fact more handsome.

“Please tell me,
” I beg.

He
rests his head on the steering wheel. “The last night you saw me, the night we made love in your dreams, I was the happiest I had ever been in my life.”

“Then why did
you leave me? You told me we would run away together in two days, and then you just disappeared.”

“I know.”

“Why, Thomas?”

He sighs heavily.
“I never told you, in fact I lied to you about something the day we met at the restaurant.”

“What did you lie about?”

“Well, it’s a natural instinct for people like us to be cautious. I trusted you, but I wasn’t sure what your aunt was like. I mean, you were so young and naïve, how could I not trust you? I moved around a lot when I was younger. My father always worried we would be found, but your family seemed to move even more often. I thought maybe Lucy was more paranoid than a normal healer might be so I withheld a few things from you.”

“Like?”
I ask curious.

“Well
, you asked if I could shift in dreams, and I told you I couldn’t. That was a lie.”

“Really?”
At least it wasn’t something really horrible.

“Yes, I can make myself into anything I want.”

“Wow.” I try to understand why he thought this would change how I felt about him.

His hands grip the steering wheel before he drops them to his lap.
“Well, that night when I left your dream, I somehow crossed into Lucy’s subconscious.”

“Had you bee
n in her dreams before?”

“Yes
.”

“
Really?” I scoot myself closer to him, but he doesn’t respond.

“Yes,” h
e replies.

“Whit and Hudson?”
I question.

“No
.”

“Why?”

“Sometimes I can’t walk twins minds.” He shrugs.

“But Lucy was a twin.”

“I can’t explain why. It’s not all twins, but sometimes there are a set of twins and I can’t link my mind to theirs. Lucy was one I could.”

“How come you never told me?”
I stare down at my hands. Why is he acting so odd?

“You never asked.” He shrugs
.

“What was she dreaming?”

“Well, she was speaking with vampires.” He runs a hand through his hair again.

“Wh
at do you mean by speaking?”

“She was negotiating.”

“Negotiating what?”

“The price for selling you, your brothers, Lucas, and myself to them.”

I felt like the wicked witch of the west
must have felt in
The Wizard of Oz
when the house fell on her.
Lucy selling us to vampires?

“That was just a dream. She w
ould never do that,” I stammer through my shock as I slide away from him.

“I thought maybe that was true.
But I couldn’t ignore certain details. She argued that they needed to wait until after your graduation so it wouldn’t be obvious. She kept reminding them about her husband and her son, how they promised to give them back if she taught you three. Aldo, she wasn’t even your blood. She was an imposter.” He turns to look me in the eyes, but I am too busy staring into the darkness. My mind feels like mush. This couldn’t be possible. Lucy loved us. He’s wrong.

“She moved us to keep
vampires from finding us. She protected us.” Tears stream down my face.

“Or to
keep someone else from finding you.”

“Who
?”

“Your parents?”
Thomas frames it like a question.

I feel like I’
ve been punched in the face. The idea that my mother and father could be alive is unimaginable.

“Aldo, she didn’t even have o
ne photo of them to show you. Why do you think that is?”

I had never seen a picture of m
y mother. Not one photo or relic of her life. We asked once if Lucy knew who our father was and she said he wasn’t anyone worth knowing. Try digesting that when you’re twelve years old. I remember Thomas asked once what our mother looked like and when I told him we had no photos of our parents, he made a face. But I didn’t question what his expression meant. He must have thought it strange, and I guess it kind of was. How could it be Lucy couldn’t have obtained one photo of her? I never thought about it. We always had so little, photos never even went up in our home because we never stayed places long. I imagined my mother looked just like Lucy, since they were twins. I always wondered did I favor my father more, because I really didn’t share many of Lucy’s features. She was pale, blue eyed, and tall. I was short, olive skinned, with brown eyes. Could it be Lucy was some crazy woman who stole us just to turn around and sell us to vampires?

“I don’t believe this,
” I manage through soft sobs.

He leans over me and opens his glove box. “
Here.” He hands me a napkin from a stack he must have kept from a fast food restaurant. “I’m sorry to be the one to tell you these things. I was at a loss. They were coming the day she died to collect us all. I didn’t know it was that day until I got to your house. When I got out of her dream I told Lucas to start packing. We were going to take you three and leave. I was going to tell you everything, but it all got messed up.” He pauses and turns away from me. “After Lucas and I packed up, I went to your house while he waited outside. Lucy answered the door and was acting strange. She insisted I come in, even though I refused. I thought if I didn’t go in, it would set off flags. Plus I didn’t think they’d actually be there at that point.” He sighs and lets his head fall back on the seat.

“She said you
referred a woman to her for a healing. That’s why she made us leave.” I lay my head on the dashboard, nausea washing over me.

“S
he lied to you. She had to get you out of the house so the two blood healers could enter and wait for you to return.”

“So she was going to trade us for her husband and son?” I still couldn’t comprehend what he was telling me.

“Of course, later when she realized you possessed other gifts, she decided to raise the negotiated price. He pulls a pack of gum out of his pocket and proceeds to unwrap it.

“Which was?”

“Well, the three of you for her husband and her son originally. Later she decided to ask for money in exchange for me, my brother, and your talent, which she had helped you develop.” He holds the gum out for me, but I shake my head, and he places it back in his pocket.

“But blood healers?
Why would blood healers buy us?”

“I
don’t know, Aldo.” His voice held an edge to it as if annoyed and very uncomfortable explaining all of this.

“That’s how they came during the day, they were blood healers?”

“Yes.” He threw his hands up.

“So
what happened?” I try to calm my crying.

“I got ambushed. I walked in
, and as soon as she shut the door, someone hit me over the head and knocked me out. If it hadn’t been for Lucas, I would be dead. Or they would have taken me. He came in and shot the place up with wooden bullets. He killed both of them.”

My mind tries to
imagine stoner Lucas busting in my house and popping wooden caps in two blood healers. An odd visual. “So how did Lucy die?”

Thomas’s eyes shift slightly. “I
killed her.” His voice hitches with his words. I knew deep down that this is where this story was leading, but to hear him say the words wrenches my gut. This woman loved me, raised me. She took care of me. How could it all have been a lie? How could she pretend everything?