Healer (The Healer Series) (27 page)

I stop at that thought
.

I stare into the darkness of my room and keep repeating that to
myself over and over. Then I hear Rhett’s words. “
Humans can be monsters too.”
Was he trying to tell me that Thomas is a monster? He did say he suspects Thomas is a reaper. My mind locks on the idea that maybe Rhett wants me to think Thomas is a monster. He obviously didn’t want me to see Thomas again. Hours later, I finally drift off to sleep, still mulling Rhett’s words over in my head.

The dreary sky and muggy air tells me m
y dream senses my uncertainty. I sit on a beach, staring out into an ocean with no end. My skin glistens with sweat from the humidity, and the air smells of salt and sand, while seagulls peck the ground a short distance away. I dig my feet into the sand and push some on top of them with my hands. The humidity is so thick, it’s almost choking me, but I try to relax. The grit of the sand feels good against my skin, and I try to avoid thinking about anything other than that, but of course, I can’t.

Rhett appears beside me
, which I conclude is my subconscious bringing him here. He stands at first, staring out onto the water, his hands shoved into the pockets of a pair of khaki linen pants, rolled up at the ankles. His white shirt is opened in the front. “I’m not a monster.”

“I know.”

“I’m not soulless either.”

I nod.

“
I know you have feelings for me.” He states it rather than question it.

I stand and brush the sand off of my shorts.
“I do,” I agree, without argument. I would only be arguing with myself.

“But you’
re also scared of me.” He turns his head slightly, eyeing me with his peripheral vision.

“
I barely know you, but I feel like I’ve known you forever. It’s weird. I’m feeling all of these things for you and it’s only been a couple of days. Are my feelings genuine or is it that you’ve trapped me here and I’m lonely, and you’re the only one here?”

He
quirks an eyebrow and shakes his head. “I trapped you here.” He says it with a snort. “When you look at it that way…” He kicks at the water.

“What other way is there to look at it?” I snap.

He ignores my question. “But there’s something else?”

A giant
knot forms in my stomach.

“Thomas
.” His tone sounds as if he’s disgusted.

“I…” No words will form, so I remain silent.

“You still love him?”
He runs a hand through his hair.

“Yes…
I mean no. I don’t know!” I cross my arms.

“It’s okay,”
You’re working things out, and I don’t want to make that harder. There are more important things at hand.” His posture straightens as he turns to me.

“Such as?”

“I have to go away for a while.”

“What?”

“Just a few days.”

“Where are you going?”

“Just have some things to take care of.”

“Rhett?”
How could I have been fooled once again? He’s really here. I thought I was talking to myself, but he’s really here.

“It’s okay.” H
e smiles and my knees grow weak.

He leans in and kisses my cheek softly
, like a friend would.

T
ingles ripple through my body. I close my eyes taken by the sensation. “Rhett I…” I open my eyes, but he’s gone. “Rhett!” I run down the beach as if he had run away—not completely vanished. “Rhett!” I stop, realizing it’s pointless. I plop back on the beach, feeling defeated. “Don’t go,” I say quietly, knowing he won’t hear me.

.

sixteen

When I wake the next day, Sarah is waiting for me in the kitchen. She sits mute, staring out the window at the back of the property.

“Good morning.” The words feel awkward. Did Rhett share
anything about the previous day’s events with her?

H
er eyebrows rise slightly, but she doesn’t speak. Good old Sarah, about as social as a monk. Mickey brings me a plate of fresh fruit and yogurt, and I’m grateful for the friendly smile he shares. I eat slowly, trying not to make any sound as I chew, because the kitchen is dead silent. When I finish, I sit quietly, waiting for Sarah to tell me what I’m supposed to do next.

“Let’s go.” She stands and exits the room. I follow
, although not as eager as she may have expected. I follow her into the first room to the right of the stairs at the front of the house. The room is a deep hunter green with a mahogany desk and leather chairs. She sits down at the desk and flips open a lap top. She types fast, and I stand in front of the desk silent, lost in my own thoughts. I want to ask her where Rhett is, but can’t find the courage. I know she would love to torture me over it.

Finally
, she stands and steps to the side of the desk chair she’s been sitting in. “Have a seat.” She motions for me to sit in the chair.

I apprehensively slide
my way around the side of the desk and sit. The Internet Explorer tab is open. I glance up at her confused. “Thought you might like to check on your brothers. Rhett said you have some code system to alert each other if there’s trouble.” I stare at her still confused. Did I tell Rhett that? Why would she let me do this?

“You seem
…” she stares into the ceiling, “tense.” She nods satisfied with her choice word. “Maybe checking on your brothers will make you feel better.”

I gawk at her. Who is this person and what has she done with the cold Sarah I’ve come to avoid like the plague.
“But Rhett said—”

“Rhett’s not here. I’m in charge now.
I’ll be back in ten.” She leaves me by myself.

I stare at the screen for a moment
. Is this is a trick? Why would she let me check on them? I log on to the banks website that holds our account. I established a very basic code system.
911
would obviously mean they needed help or had an emergency. Anything with the number 7 would indicate they moved and the numbers following would indicate where. So if the bank account held $7, 234.00 I would know they had moved to Pierre, South Dakota. I log into the accounts and stare at the screen for a moment, trying to decipher the numbers in the savings account.

Member Checking: 2311.15

Member Savings
:              21.16

The balance in the savings account has never been so low. In fact, we were to keep at least one thousand dollars in the account because the bank required it. I run numbers in my head, trying to remember what 21.16 would mean, but nothing stands out. Why are they keeping so much money in the checking account? I open the desk drawer, grab a pad of Post-Its, and jot the numbers down from both accounts. I’m not worried, because they know what codes to signal me with if there is trouble. I log off of the bank account and clear the cookies to hide any trail of where I’ve been. I sit lost in thought until Sarah enters the room, snapping me back to reality.

“The horses are waiting.” She doesn’t wait f
or a response before she walks to the front door.

I shove the Post-It in my pocket and follow her
down to the barn. The sun hides behind a blanket of gray clouds, but the day is warm. I wore jeans and tennis shoes today, but opted not to wear a jacket. If I end up with a shovel in my hands again I’ll be glad I wore short sleeves.

Sarah and I clean the stalls. M
ore like I clean the stalls and she leads the horses out into the field. After we finish, she shows me how to fill their water buckets and where to get feed for their stalls.

I follow her instructions while I remain lost in thought. I can’t
seem to shake Rhett’s words from last night.
“Humans can be monsters too.”
Was that just his way of defending what he is? Sarah finally releases me for lunch, instructing me to come straight back afterwards.

As I eat
, I pull the post-it note out of my pocket and stare at the numbers, still unable to make any sense out of them. I finish my meal of tuna on wheat with baby carrots as a side and return to the barn. I find Sarah has saddled Bruno and Esmeralda, but I’m surprised to find Red and Green Mile waiting by the fence.

They stand at the fence, watching me as I approach.
I haven’t seen them since the night I arrived. I nod a hello to them as I climb through the fence. Did Rhett send them back in his absence to make sure I don’t try to escape? “Where have they been?”

“Around,” s
he shrugs.

“We’re going for a ride?”
I pet Esmeralda.

“No, I just saddled the horses for fun.”

I roll my eyes.
Smart ass.

We follow the same trail that Rhett and I did the f
irst time he took me riding. I’m still uneasy, but holding onto the knob on the front of the saddle that I now know is called a horn seems to help. I try not to look down as the earth feels like it’s a hundred feet away. We ride in silence for a while when finally, to my surprise, Sarah begins to speak.

“So
, Rhett said he told you our story.”

“Uh
, yeah.” I wish I had a better response.

“He left out a big part of it that I think you should know.”
She pulls a leaf off of a branch as she passes it.

I
wait in anticipation for her to continue.

“It’s
difficult for him to speak about it. He blames himself a great deal.”

“I can see that.”

“My mother and I were raped before they killed her. I begged them to kill me, too. Like you, I had this idea that being turned meant I would become a monster. I kept crying that I didn’t want to be a blood healer and they just laughed. Finally, one of them told me I wasn’t going to be turned.” She pauses and the world is silent with the exception of the horses’ hooves stomping the earth.

“Di
d they just want to feed on you for your energy?” I ask, unable to wait for her to continue.

She stares straight ahead,
piercing blue eyes set in soft pale skin, her expression never indicating any emotion she may be feeling. “No, they didn’t want me for that either. When Rhett returned and they took us, as you know they held us for quite some time. He would visit me in my dreams and we kept trying to figure out why we had not been turned yet. But we could have never imagined their reason.”

I am literally on the edge of my seat, well saddle, in anticipation.

“They intended to use us for breeding.” She tosses the leaf she’s been holding, while my brain does a mental flip.

Did she just say breeding?
“Breeding?” I manage to spit out in spite of myself.

“Not together, of course,” s
he clarifies. “Healers are becoming extinct; many of those left do not heal at all because they don’t want to be found. We discovered that vampires had resorted to kidnapping healers and impregnating the females with another male healer’s sperm. I was to be used to produce newborn healers and Rhett was to be used to provide sperm.”

My jaw feels like
it’s dragging the ground. “So, they forced you to have sex with another healer?”

“T
hey had doctors who could artificially inseminate the females. They attempted this on me six times with no success. Of course, they had male healers on the payroll they used in situations like mine.” She pauses and there’s an awkward silence.

My heart races as I wait for her next words.

“There were three different men who…” She clears her throat. “Well, had their way with me.” Her throat moves as she swallows hard.

I
want to jump off of my horse, yank her down, and hug her, but I know better. She would probably punch me in my face. Then a thought hits me like a Mack truck.
Does Rhett have children?
“So, what happened?” I mentally flip
on
my filter, stopping myself from questioning anything about Rhett.

“
After they realized I couldn’t produce offspring, they decided to change us if we promised to obey. I begged Rhett to agree and he did; he knew if he agreed he had a better chance of killing the vampires that killed our mother and hurt me. Rhett would come into my dreams and we planned an escape. When the day came, I created a scene so he could escape. He was super pissed at me, but swore he would get me out no matter what. Rhett continued to walk in my dreams and we were able to plan my escape, but that changed when I began to see the women that were being brought in for impregnating. I knew I had to help them. No woman deserves to be used that way and no child deserves to be created for such a purpose. So I stayed and earned the trust of my captors.”

“Sarah, I’
m speechless,” I manage to get out. Did Lucy know these things and never told me?

“
We all cope with things differently. I know I seem shut off and a little cold sometimes.”

I don’t point out she’s being extremely modest in herself description.

“Which leads me to you.”

“
You think I’m shut off?” I pull my hair back off of my shoulders.

“No.
Not at all. In fact you’re like my polar opposite. You have no ability to hide any thought or emotion. I think you’ve cried at least seventy percent of the time you’ve been here.”

She’s calling me a cry baby
.
“Your point?”

“The reason you need
to know all of this is because—”

Suddenly
, Bruno rears up. As my body gives way to the law of gravity, I try to grab the saddle to keep myself from being thrown. But it’s too late. I plummet to the ground like a ton of bricks. Pain echoes through my body as my ankle twists, and I cry out in pain. Bruno runs off and Sarah jumps off of Esmeralda fast as a bullet to my side.

“You okay?”
She reaches to touch me, but stops.

“
Yeah, I twisted my ankle.”

Sarah
stares off. Her lips tighten into a thin line. “You have got to be kidding me,” she mumbles under her breath, shaking her head.

“I’m sorry. I don
’t know what spooked him.” She’s probably frustrated that I’m hurt, Bruno ran off, and now she has to get me back to the house.

She places her hand on my ankle and
a cool tingle replaces the pain. Her energy is not as intense as Rhett’s.

My body relaxes as the pain vanishes.
“Thanks.” I turn my foot side to side, testing it.

“No problem.
” She stands, but doesn’t offer a hand to help me up. “You take Esmeralda, I’m going to walk.”

“Are you sure?” I stand,
and test my weight on my ankle.

“Yeah, go ahead. I’ll be back later.”

“Are you okay?” I ask concerned after the horrific story she just shared with me.

“Aw
, do you want to hold my hand and comfort me?” She makes a pouty face, and I know she’s mocking me. Old Sarah is back.

I
manage to get on Esmeralda, but look down once I’m in the saddle to see Sarah looking around. “What are you looking for?”

“
Keeping an eye out for Bruno,” she snaps.

“
Oh
.”

“Go,” s
he orders. Yep, old Sarah is definitely back. I heel Esmeralda’s side, and we’re off.

Three days pass
, and Red and Green Mile are there every minute of it. They never speak to me, but are always there, lurking a short distance away. The days seem to last an eternity. On the third day Sarah and I sit in silence at the table in the kitchen while I eat my bland dinner of grilled chicken and steamed broccoli. I find myself wishing Rhett would return with a giant pizza and a two liter of Coke. “Where is Rhett?” I ask, unable to stop myself anymore.

“He needed some time away.”

“Where did he go?”

“Why do you care?”

“Is he coming back?”

“You are unbelievable.” She stands up and leaves the kitchen.

I don’t get upset at her reaction. In my mind
, Sarah is entitled to act however she wants after what she’s been through. It would still be nice if she were a little less cranky.

As the days pass
, Sarah’s story haunts me. In spite of her less than friendly personality I know deep down she’s just scarred. Who wouldn’t be after what she went through?

Each night
I go to bed, I contemplate what I will do if Rhett doesn’t come back. I’ll have to run away or something. That would be difficult with Red and Green Mile around.