Hearts on Fire: A Biker Erotic Romance (3 page)

CHAPTER THREE

Annie's tears started before she reached the first corner. After the turn, she wiped her eyes and checked her mirror. What was she looking for? Did she think he would follow her?

Did she want him to?

Part of her wanted him to follow. Wanted him to run her down and keep her from leaving. Claim her. He wasn't going to do that. She wiped her tears and pressed down on the accelerator.

The tears were from anger more than anything else. She wasn't angry that she slept with him. True, she had a few drinks last night, but she knew what she was doing. She wanted to sleep with him. He was big, handsome, and made her laugh. He was a good time and she really needed a good time. Until she was in his arms, she didn't realize just how much she needed a good time.

And it was good, too. Really good. He probably took it as a brush off, but she wasn't lying when she said it was fucking amazing. She was fully fondled, used, and satisfied right now. There wasn't a place on her body that didn't feel the blissful effects from the climaxes. The memory of their night nearly kept her in bed with him.

Nearly.

No, she wasn't angry about sleeping with him. She was angry for believing the lie. She was pissed off that she bought into it. She had broken down and trusted him. She bought into the fantasy of last night. Not the sex,
the claim
.

It wasn't Manny's fault. He never promised anything. He wouldn't even know what she was talking about. All he did was put his hand on her thigh. He just picked her up and carried her to his room. He just wrapped his arms around her. That's all. She did all rest to herself.

But, dear God, that felt good, too. Fuck!

It was good. It was better than the sex. The sex was phenomenal, too.

It hurt more than she could bear, right now. She woke up next to him and knew she made it all up. It was a total self-induced fantasy. A delusion. It wasn't real and it never would be. Ever.

Still, its absence left a hole in her chest. She felt so empty it was hard to breathe. When he held her last night and claimed her, she found something she never thought she wanted or needed. For those few hours, she
belonged
to him. She never belonged anywhere. She certainly never belonged to anyone.

Annie carried her own weight and the weight of others, too. She stood on her own feet and fought her own battles. She paid her own way and faced her own failures.

Alone.

Last night, she wasn't just having sex with him. She belonged to him. He was with her, completely. Wrapped around her. The idea of
alone
didn't exist. It wasn't even a theoretical concept.

Fuck! What type of fucked-up bitch am I?

Again, it wasn't Manny's fault. If, somehow, she could articulate how she felt when he held her, he would either blanch white or die laughing. He was a fucking biker. He was out on a Friday night, looking for pussy for Christ's sake! She knew that.

He was exactly what the doctor ordered. No harm, no foul. She should thank the big guy for knowing how to fuck a woman silly because she definitely needed it.

She put her hand on her lower abs. The blissful soreness still lingered. "God. That man can fuck!" she hissed with a smile. Then, she wiped her tears again.

If she hadn’t fucked it up, she could have given him her number. Then, she may have rolled with him once in a while. Just for fun and release. She knew he wasn't going to throw in his chips with her, not with the shit she had going on her life. No sane man would. He was definitely worth a booty call.

She fucked that all up though. She bought into the lie. There was no way she could let him hold her again and not feel this hole in her chest. Fuck, it hurt!

She made it a few blocks from her house before she pulled into the parking lot of a gas station. She parked the car, cut the engine, and broke down into a sobbing fit for nearly fifteen minutes. The overwhelming feeling of being alone consumed her.

After the bliss of her delusion, feeling alone was a raw and jagged. For several minutes, she was convinced that it was too much and that she wasn't going to make it. There was no way she could be in this much pain and not die.

She didn't die though, much to her dismay.

How could it have been so real?

She had no answer for that one. It wasn't like she ever thought about it before. Nothing in her past experience, real or fantasy, even came close. In fact, if a man had ever told her that she
belonged
to him, she would have punched him right in the nose. Then, she would have gone for his balls with something sharp. The fuck if she belonged to him or anyone else.

So, what the fuck?

The sobbing fit passed, but the hole remained. She felt as empty and bleak as before. "This is really going to hurt, you silly bitch," she told herself as she looked in the mirror to find herself appearing abused. "I’ve got to clean up," she sighed. "Rosie's going to think some guy beat me last night."

Annie not only believed she belonged to Manny, but she wanted to belong to him. It was as confusing as it was hurtful. She would have given him anything last night, performed any sexual pleasure -- if there were any she didn't already perform. She would have done it all twice, if he told her, out loud, that she belonged to him.

So, again, what the fuck?

The look in his eyes when she backed out of his driveway haunted her. She hurt him. He wanted to say something then. Something important. Something she probably should have listened to. After the way he treated her last night, she probably should have listened.

His eyes...God. His eyes.

What was that in his eyes? Fear? Need? When her mind brought up the right word she shuddered.
Despair.

Shit, what have I done?

She knew about despair. She was in it right now. He couldn't have fallen for her though, right? It was just a Friday night. He was just looking for some pussy! He wasn't a kid for crying out loud!

She could not forget his eyes, as he stood on his front lawn. He wanted to say something to her. He wanted to say it more than anything. But he didn't move or speak. And she couldn't bear to look at him any longer. She needed what he never offered her.

"It wasn't real!" she wailed, as she pounded her hands against the steering wheel. "It wasn't real," she whimpered. Then, the sobbing returned.

CHAPTER FOUR

Sunday, late morning, Manny pulled his softail framed Harley-Davidson up to the front of Eagle's Roost tavern. He cut the engine. He sat on the bike, as he listened to the engine tick as it cooled. He was trying to gather himself.

It was all wrong. All backwards and upside-down. Annie was right. It was just a Friday night. He went out looking for pussy, found some pussy, and had the pussy. Then, it was Saturday morning. Time for new pussy. It had been that way for a long time. Years in fact.

He didn't want new pussy though.

Getting off the bike, he walked into the tavern and looked around. He didn't see anyone he recognized, except Eric behind the bar. This was a good thing. He didn't really come here to socialize, he came to drink. And by drink, he meant sit at the bar, glass in hand, and get into some serious sulking.

He looked longingly into the spiced rum in his hand. He wished it really did ease pain or contain answers. Either would be worth any amount of money, right now.

It was now Sunday morning, just after ten o'clock. More than a day passed since he hesitated and lost Annie. He didn't have her number or know where she lived. He doubted he would ever find her in that bar again; but, he was going to try. Every Friday night he was going to be there. Maybe she would show up. From what she said though, that was the first time in more than a year. It was her first time out to escape her real life.

It crossed his mind to stop by her print shop, but that kind of thing wasn’t good. They wouldn’t have alone time. She would be instantly defensive. He wasn’t looking for a scene. He wanted her back, not a restraining order keeping him away.

He went out last night with some of the guys to a new place down on the beach. He shot pool, drank beer, and tried to smile. Tried to laugh it off. It was just really good pussy, that's all. Hell, he was a grown man. He didn't get laid and then fall in love because of it. Shit!

It wasn't the pussy though. If it was just the pussy he would be alright, but it wasn't. It was something else. Something way down deep. He didn't like deep. Deep sucked. Deep was never fun. He was still falling off that ledge, so it looked like he better get acquainted with deep.

Last night, he played pool and failed miserably to laugh it off. He brought no one home with him, though he had several offers. They weren't Annie. If they weren't Annie, then they weren't going to fill up the hole in his chest. So what if they gave him an orgasm? Annie gave him something much more than that. Something he couldn't even name right now.

The look in her eyes, when he hesitated, was the killer. The rawness of it. The utter yearning for him to say what he needed to say. What he wanted to say. Why didn't he just say it?

Her eyes were the killer. He let her down. Somehow. He wasn't sure how. Probably, he would never know. She needed something from him, at that moment. It didn't have a damn thing to do with the sex.

Manny’s instincts told him that what she needed was very close to the same thing he needed from her. The difference was that she felt he wasn't going to give it to her. She believed she was just a booty call to him. She knew the score. She was a big girl. So, she left. She didn't cause a scene or beg him to call.

She was wrong.

He had the chance to tell her that. She gave it to him. He let her down.

The rum wasn't working worth shit. His mind went over the same thing, again and again. His mind flashed up images of those eyes of hers, begging him to talk to her. Begging him to make it real.

Real?

That word resonated. He leaned back and tasted it for a moment. It was something he wanted, too. At least it was what he wanted with Annie. No more fantasy Friday nights. He wanted something real. Something that lasted all week long. All year long. Something that was going to be there when he woke up and when he got home.

But
real
, wasn't going to happen without Annie.
Real
. Experiencing it with her changed everything.

He knew this from previous experience, sort of. A parallel experience anyway with the club and his biker brothers. The Fire Devils were real. He had rode around a long time, hanging with this guy, that guy, and various groups. Moving from place to place, but never really belonging anywhere. He got along, sure, but he didn't
belong
. Not until he found the Fire Devils. They got him, understood him. He got them as well. He fit in. He belonged with them. It was a damn good feeling. He's clung to that feeling since then.

Annie belonged with him, too. That was real.

CHAPTER FIVE

Annie woke at four o'clock in the morning the following Friday. For a moment, she was in Manny's arms. The profound feeling of belonging to him wrapped her in bliss.Then, it was gone.

The sudden chill of being alone swept through her. She shuddered, as a whimper escaped her lips. Steeling herself against another sobbing fit, she curled into herself. She squeezed her arms around her body and begged it not to happen again.

The moment passed, like it always did. She could get through this, she told herself. She was tough. She had too much weight on her to stumble now. Her father was getting worse. The business was ready to crumble. She couldn't stumble now.

She got out of bed and went into her shower. She set it as hot as she could stand. Then, she stepped into the steam. She scrubbed herself hard, until her skin was pink.

Maybe she could go to his house. That look in his eyes, on the lawn? Maybe it was more for him, too. Maybe he would just hold her for a while. Would he do that?

She shook her head, it didn't matter if he would or not. He could fuck her silly again and it wouldn't help. It would feel great, but it wouldn't fill the hole.

Fantasy or not, she needed to belong to him. That wasn't going to happen. Not with him, not with anyone. But that's what she needed. She didn't know if that meant love or not. Annie wasn't sure she had ever been in love.

The work week was hell. Thank God, it was Friday. Every time the damn door opened to her shop, hope spiked through her. She prayed it might be Manny. When it wasn't him, her mood got worse. Her poor employees were walking around like she was a ticking bomb. Kari, her secretary, was ready to burst into tears from the way Annie stomped around and bit people's heads off.

Christ.

It had to stop. It wasn't fair to them. She had good people working for her. That's why she fought so hard to keep the business on its feet. They were depending on her. They didn't deserve to be treated like she treated them for the last few days.

She looked at herself in the mirror and nodded her head, as she said, "Buck up, bitch. You did this to yourself."

After dressing she went to check on her dad. She hoped he would have a good day today. His last few had been bad ones.

   ***  

Friday night, Manny watched his fellow Fire Devils playing pool in the bar where he met Annie. His mind wasn't on the game, the jokes, or the laughter. He was hoping Annie would come back tonight. He wasn't sure what he was going to say or do; but, if she was here, at least he would have a shot at doing or saying something.

He wouldn't hesitate this time. The ledge was already crossed. There was no fear to face greater than the one he faced all week -- a life without Annie.

It was just about nine o'clock when a young, blond vixen walked up to him and looked him over. She was mainly interested in his chest, the left side of his chest in fact. He glanced down and saw the patch that was sewn onto his leather vest that said,
Manny
.

"You're Manny?" she asked. Her voice was even, but interested.

He nodded. She was good looking. Before Annie, she would have been just the type he would have gone for.

The flash of fire in her eyes told him what was coming, but he didn't have the will to stop it. He watched as her hand flashed out and slapped him across the face with surprising force, "That's for Annie, you son of a bitch!" she snarled and began walking away.

"Holy shit!" Bob laughed. He dropped the pool stick he was holding.

The other guys were looking to Manny. Amused surprise mixed with confusion on their faces. They waited for some sign as to what he wanted them to do. Whatever it was, they were down, as he knew they would be. If that was a guy who sucker punched him, the asshole would already be on the floor. But since it was a woman, they waited.

Manny lifted a hand and eased them back. He hurried up to the blond who was nearly at the front door. He caught her by the arm and spun her around, "Annie? Did you say Annie?"

"Let go of me!" she snapped, as she yanked back from him.

He let go. "Please, what are you talking about? What happened to Annie?" he pressed.

"What happened? You gutted her, you fucking pig!"

"Gutted?" His brain staggered. Images of the worse possible kind flashed through his mind, "Is she hurt? Where is she?"

"Hurt?! You really are a fucking pig! Of course she's hurt! What the fuck? You just slap them around? Think it’s fun? You should be locked up!"

"Slapped?!" he growled. His full focus blistered on that word. "Who slapped Annie? I'll fucking kill 'em!" he snarled. His ferocity sent the little blond back a few steps.

A hand grabbed his shoulder, "What the hell is going..."

Manny whirled. He grabbed the intruder by the throat and lifted him off the ground. "This ain't yours! Back off!" Then, he dropped the man, whose feet collapsed under him, landing him on his ass. Manny turned back. The intruder was already forgotten, but the blond was gone. Running outside, he reached the parking lot and saw a car pulling out. Then, it caught up to speed with traffic. "Fuck!"