Helena Goes to Hollywood: A Helena Morris Mystery (4 page)

“
Yes
, I do. I’d rather not have you so exposed. I didn’t bring a dress or anything.” I picked up a small jar of eye cream and tossed it from hand to hand. While I wanted her under house arrest, it simply wasn’t practical.

Her perfectly sculptured eyebrow arched at me in the mirror. “That jar is a thousand dollars.”

“For this? You’re crazy.” I awkwardly grabbed it out of the air and carefully set it down.

“I have to look good. Don’t worry about your clothes, because Jordan will bring something. He’ll fix everything.” She pulled a few sets of large flat earrings out of a box. “Which ones?”

This was way beyond me. I’d dressed up for plenty of FBI dinners and weddings to look presentable but cutting edge fashion was a different level. I’d watched enough
Sex and the City
to know designer names but couldn’t tell Gucci from Dolce.

There was a dark pink pair with silver on the edges. Big silver dangling ones. And red beaded ones that would hang down to her shoulder.

“I think I’m going to dig the bullets out of the garden,” I said.

“No, never mind that. Lupe will get them tomorrow. I’ll wait for Jordan on the earrings.” Her hands fluttered like nervous butterflies. “It’ll be okay, but just please wear whatever he has and don’t argue.”

“Why would I argue?”

“You always argue.” She stomped her heel.

I didn’t this time and changed the subject instead. I needed to know who had access to the house.

“Is Lupe the new housekeeper?”

“Of course, I sent her home today. I couldn’t let her see me this down. She acts like a mother, but she’ll be in tomorrow morning. Don’t worry, she’s from an approved agency. Why are you so suspicious?” Sonia added a layer of gloss to her lips.

I pulled her off the stool to stand and face me and held her by those bony shoulders. “Why? Wake up! Sonia, you’ve got a stalker. Someone is trying to scare you, hurt you, or possibly even kill you. That is more important than a party. More important than a divorce. Than a show. Than your career. Do you understand me?”

She looked down. “So hide out and let them win?”

“No, but don’t make their job easy either. Listen to me and use your head. You texted me, you want my help. Try to do it my way, because self-defense is my area.”

She nodded but frowned at the floor.

“What?” I asked.

“You need some new shoes. Bet you need a pedicure too.” She grabbed my left hand. “Definitely need a manicure.”

“Stop changing the subject. No one cares what I look like.” I tried to pull my hand away when the doorbell rang. Sonia let go and dashed off.

“Jordan!” She ran down the stairs and threw open the door.

I stifled my lecture on peephole usage for another day. Jordan obviously lived very close, which could come in handy. I’d have to check on Danny and someone had to watch Sonia. Jordan seemed the safest choice.

He lugged several garment bags up the stairs. “Ready? Fashion show time!”

I was in real trouble.

“I just need one dress.” Where did all these come from? Jordan was effeminate but didn’t strike me as a drag queen. He was too tall anyway; I’d never fit into anything of his.

“These will let us find one great one for you,” Jordan grinned. “Trust me.”

“I just don’t have anything a size ten.” Sonia shrugged.

“I’ve got plenty. Since they fired that supporting actress for gaining forty pounds, I’ve got it all.” Jordan hustled the two of us into the bathroom and hung them on the mega shower.

“They can fire people for that?” I asked.

Feeling like a freak, I folded my arms over my C-cup chest. At least I didn’t have to buy boobs. Jordan being in the wardrobe department meant he had access to clothes. I hoped they were nothing too out there.

“Sweetie, it’s a TV show. Your sister is a four, max. The new supporting girl is a six. Bernadette is a zero. The camera does add pounds. This former star blew up to a fourteen. Can you imagine? Size can absolutely be in the contract. Actors are hired for image as well as talent.” Jordan opened one of the bags. “Now get out of that shabby wear, it’s hurting my eyes.”

I folded my arms tighter and stared back. What did they have against normal clothes?

“Hel, stop.” Sonia gave me the hurry up wave. “You can’t go like that.”

“Relax, we’re all girls here. I fitted that size fourteen so I’ve seen worse.” He sat on the edge of the Jacuzzi tub that fit four, legs crossed in a very prim way I couldn’t have pulled off in my secondhand prom dress.

I tugged my T-shirt over my head and pulled off the black boots. Finally I unbuttoned the jeans and slid them off. Down to a black bra and matching hi-cut cotton panties, I removed my watch. Looking from Sonia to Jordan, I tried not to smile.

I wasn’t a size ten from flab. It was just my hourglass body type. I felt comfortable with my size, shape, and ability to kick the ass of anyone who didn’t like it.

“Nice muscle definition. You do work out a lot.” Jordan nodded approvingly. “All that karate does a body good.”

“Muscle looks bulky on camera.” Sonia gave me a model pout.

Jordan rolled his eyes. “Sonia, honey, you don’t have to be a toothpick to be hot. JLo, Queen Latifah, Beyonce, and Eva Mendes are all smoking! They get the hottest men and they’ve got curves.”

“But Hel’s white,” Sonia said matter-of-factly.

Jordan reflected. “You’ve got a point. White girls can’t be curvaceous here unless they’re Dolly Parton. Even she had to build Dollywood. Damn! The world just isn’t fair. There is that bass singer and some models are breaking in.”

I nearly busted out laughing at their serious analysis of how I’d fit in or not.

“I don’t care about my curves. I don’t want to be a model or an actress. I need an appropriate dress so I can stick near Sonia, that’s all. I’m protection so I need to blend in.”

“A Hollywood ninja. Love the attitude!” Jordan gushed and seemed to relax around me. He pulled open a different garment bag. “The legs and arms are so toned. I’ve got just the dress!”

It was sleeveless, not strapless, thank God! My curves didn’t sit well in strapless, especially if there was a chance I’d need to fight. The dress was shorter than I normally wore with a nice square neckline and classic cut in a shimmery black fabric. Overall, I didn’t hate it.

“Try it on.” Jordan handed it to me.

“I expected something more out there. Like Sonia’s fashions.” I slipped it over my head and tried to ignore the price tag of over ten grand and the designer label. It fit, a little snug in spots, but good enough.

“Sonia gets photographed and followed. She must always be cutting edge. You...odds are no one will notice you. It’s a nice black dress, and you can add a colorful wrap for a change of looks. Just don’t wear it to the same place twice. I’ll leave the others in case you need them. They’ve got no use for them at the studio.” Jordan adjusted my cleavage so more showed and nodded.

“I’m not here to party.” I looked at myself in the mirror and wasn’t scared, despite the amount of skin showing. The price tag made me a little nervous about spilling anything but I had to fit in a little.

“You need some makeup and hair, but it’ll do,” Jordan said.

“Help me with jewelry, Jordan!” Sonia opened her box of accessories yet again.

“Helena is so pale. Can’t you get her an appointment for a spray tan?” Jordan whispered, like I couldn’t hear him.

“No tan,” I cut in.

I’d tried fake tanning once for a friend’s wedding. Some girls weren’t meant to tan, at least not me. I came out orange even following all the directions.

Sonia ignored me and talked to Jordan. “Why didn’t you think of that when she showed up?”

“I’m here to take care of this and go home!” Weren’t they listening at all?

Jordan turned to me and flipped the topic. “So you’ve got an ex. FBI yummy like Mulder?”

“He’s attractive.” I didn’t like the direction of this talk.

“Why’d you drop him?” Jordan focused on reworking my hair.

“She’s stupid,” Sonia said. “Todd is nice, smart, and hardworking. Boring clothes, but good looking and always getting promoted. We never knew where they’d move next.”

“Exactly. He kept changing jobs. I got tired of moving around. I told him for years I wanted to settle down so we could start a family but he didn’t listen. I needed the divorce before I really resented him. Men!” I looked up at Jordan. “No offense.”

He grinned. “None taken—men are a pain in my ass too. How long since you divorced him?”

“About eight years. I have a degree in teaching I never used in a real school because I would’ve had to move districts every other year, thanks to Todd. That means starting at the bottom in every new district.”

“You teach martial arts,” Sonia said.

“True. I still had to start over, gain respect and trust. It never stopped. He moved up and I started over at the bottom.” As much as I loved Todd I couldn’t live my whole life like that.

“You could’ve had kids and stayed at home,” Sonia shrugged.

“Now you sound like Mom,” I replied. That’d shut her up. “I didn’t want my kids moving around not having the same friends or school system. Kids need stability. We had that growing up. Look how well we turned out. You’re a big star and still need my help. That’s family. I’ll do anything to keep you safe.”

Jordan sighed. “Thank the good Lord for that. Sonia’s been a wreck the past week worrying about the stalker, the ex, and the show. Now let me at that makeup.”

“I’m wearing makeup.” Okay, so my hair was average. A little gel, the right brush, and a blow dryer and I had no issues. I wore the basics of makeup daily.

“Please, you need actress makeup and hair, not rest of America makeup and hair or you’ll fade into the background. Maybe we’ll find you a sexy stuntman.” Jordan steered me to the vanity and sat me down.

“Don’t overdo it.” I gave in to the force of Jordan. I was outnumbered.

“Let him fix your eyes at least. You need some lashes,” Sonia said.

“Fine, do you have a black bag that’s big enough to fit my gun?” I asked.

They had their priorities.

I had mine.

O
ur limo stopped in front of a massive Bel Air mansion. The pounding bass of music coming from the home could be heard the second the driver opened the door.

“Are you sure?” I asked Sonia.

“I have to go, Hel. Everyone will be here. It’s prime time on a big network. We’ve got to create as much buzz as possible for the show.” She stepped out, all smiles as the cameras flashed.

For a moment I contemplated going out the other door but I’d have to go in the front door by the reporters anyway. The closer I stayed to my sister, the better. I gave her a few feet and then stepped out. Jordan came out behind me and offered his arm, taking us both in.

Sonia seemed more at ease with a man on her arm even if he was gay. She had always wanted male attention. The flash of cameras and shouting of reporters would help her ego at least.

“How long will this last?” I asked Jordan as we got inside.

“All night for the rock stars. Don’t worry, she only has to make an appearance and listen to the band play their song for everyone. A few pictures, give some quick interviews, and she’s done. Nothing major but it helps the show. Sonia has an early call tomorrow so they won’t let her party all night. Let’s get some drinks. You need to learn to enjoy the perks of being a hanger-on.” He steered me through the crowd to the bar.

“I don’t like being away from Sonia.” I got a Diet Coke with cherries and surveyed the mega-mansion. All the exterior doors were open and the crowd spilled out onto the surrounding grounds. An epic staircase led to a second floor of what I could only assume was more of the same.

I didn’t need any Hollywood experience to tell me what would go on up there. It was like a high school party only with less fear of getting caught and a lot wilder sex, plus better illegal substances. The spacious landing at the top of the stairs held all the necessities for a rock concert.

“Don’t worry, Sonia is smart about her job. She’s right over there with her co-star and the executive producer. It’s the director’s house. No one would be dumb enough to go after her here. There is security blended in with the groupies.” Jordan sipped a pink bubbly drink.

“How long have you known my sister?” I stirred my drink and studied the crowd for anyone I didn’t like the looks of. People dressed to appear wild and dangerous, but their attitude and walk told me a lot. That and good old gut instinct were all I had.

“Since we started on this show. She’s sweet deep down. Poor thing gets a big break and her husband acts up, her fans get upset, and now this stalker thing. She’s trying to be tough.”

“I’m here now. I’ll keep an eye on her. Number one on my list of people to talk to—Danny,” I said. Jordan got sidetracked guy watching while I lost sight of Sonia in the crowd and moved forward to find her.

I grabbed an eggroll off a passing waiter’s tray as I wandered through the crowd
. Let the others suffer to be a double zero.
If it weren’t for my sister I’d never have known there actually was a size smaller than zero. No way would I ever wear it.

“Hell yeah, now this is a woman.” The voice came from behind me as an unauthorized hand grabbed my ass.

My elbow flew back and up, connecting with the nose of the attacker. Dropping the eggroll, I turned fully when I heard him cry out. My feet spread in fight stance, not at all ladylike. My hands were up and in front of me, Sonia’s sparkling Marc Jacobs black bag hung at the crook of my elbow. If I got blood on it, Sonia would probably have a fit but she’d live.

Two large Latino men traded words in Spanish as they helped my attacker stay upright. From their accent I knew they were Puerto Rican. I couldn’t turn off my instincts. They weren’t a real danger. I could take all three but none of them made a move. My attacker’s nose dripped blood. Maybe my reflexes were a little too high strung because of Sonia?

Nah...he grabbed me and that was out of line.

“What’s your problem, bitch? That was a compliment.” One of the friends gave me a dirty look.