Here All Along (8 page)

“You know my story, Gabe.”

“Only part of it. Sage Holtz, one of the brightest young stars in Hollywood. Academy Award nominee. Golden Globe winner. And now, unexpected hermit.”

She rolled her eyes. “You forgot the part about drug-addicted, alcoholic, wild child who self-destructed on camera in front of the whole world.”

“I was trying to stay positive.” He shrugged. “So what changed all that?”

“If you remember, I was hit by a car.” She took a sip of the smoky green tea that had just been brought to their table. “Kind of makes a girl wake up and change her priorities.”

“So that explains the no drinking at dinner last night. But that doesn’t explain you and Gideon.”

“The Kid helped me out when I was in that dark place.”

“The ‘Kid’?”

“Running joke between us.” She folded her hands in her lap and focused on keeping her voice from shaking as she dredged up the painful memories. “I don’t remember what happened that night. I just remember waking up in the hospital and finding him there at my bedside. Not my mom. Definitely not my dad. Only him. I’d fractured my nose, my hip, and my pelvis, so I was in no condition to go home alone, so he let me crash at his place until I could get up and moving again. Then I found out I was completely broke.”

“Ouch!” Gabe gave her a sympathetic wince and poured some sake into a tiny white cup for himself. “What happened to your money?”

“My parents spent a chunk of it on themselves, and I’d burned through the rest between shopping, drugs, and hospital bills. By the time I could consider working again, I’d gained thirty pounds, had a new nose, and gone back to my natural hair color. No one recognized me. And even if they did, they wouldn’t hire me based on my reputation. I was broke and unemployed, so Gideon offered to hire me on as his assistant until I could get my life back into order. That was three years ago.”

“And is your life finally in order now?”

She thought back to the growing tension between her and Gideon and the inner turmoil in her heart. No, she wouldn’t say her life was in order. If anything, it seemed more chaotic than ever. But she forced a serene smile on her face and replied, “Getting closer every day.”

“Do you stay with him because you’re not ready to leave? Or because you feel obligated to him?”

Her spine stiffened. He didn’t waste any time throwing a few punches into the conversation, and for a split second, she considered leaving. But if she showed him how close he’d gotten to the heart of the issue, he might use it against her. “I stay because we’re friends—best friends—and we look out for each other.”

“Like you did with the whole Mackinzie hoopla this evening.”

“Precisely.” She took another sip of tea, relieved to have averted one more crisis. “And I’m not planning on mooching off of him forever.”

“What’s your plan? Going back to acting?”

She wanted to laugh and shake her head, but the pang in the center of her chest reminded her how much she missed the profession. It fed her soul, but at the same time, blackened it. “No, I don’t think I will.”

“Why not? You showed such potential.”

“Until the biz lowered the hammer on me.” She pushed back from the table, wishing the conversation would turn to some other subject.

“You mean from your addictions?”

“Even before then. I was too fat, too skinny, too pale, too tan, too this, that, and the other. No matter what I did, someone found fault with me.”

“Screw them. It shouldn’t matter what you look like, so long as you have the talent. And you,
Sage
, had the talent.”

“Thank you, Gabe, but it’s different for women. A man can be balding with a beer gut and still get choice roles. But with women—if we gain five pounds or start to get laugh lines or crow’s feet, we’re passed over for some younger model. I watched it happen with my mom, and I saw what it did to her. She spent so much time and effort chasing after that elusive goal of perfection that she lost herself in the process. I don’t want to end up that way.”

Gabe appeared to ponder her words, then swept his gaze over her. “You are still very attractive.”

“But I’m no longer a size zero, and I’ve made my peace with that. If that makes me too big for the screen, then so be it. I’m strong and healthy, and that’s a far cry from what I was after the accident. Let Mackinzie deal with the alternating cycle of anorexia and bulimia so she can maintain that svelte figure.”

Gabe choked on a laugh and emptied his cup of sake. “So there’s no hope of ever co-starring with you?”

“Nope. My acting days are done.”

“Then why are you still hanging around the biz?”

Her throat tightened, and she squirmed in the chair. “Because someone needs to keep Gideon out of trouble.”

He grinned and shook his head. “No, I don’t think that’s the reason. You and me and maybe even Gideon—we got into this because we loved it. We were bitten by the acting bug at a young age, and we’ve spent hours honing our craft in the hopes that someone would appreciate us for our art and not just because we’re a pretty face. And you don’t put all that effort into something and then abandon it.”

“Speak for yourself.” She tried to keep a sarcastic edge to her voice, but deep inside, she panicked over how close he came to discovering the truth. She couldn’t leave Hollywood behind—not entirely. She avoided the spotlight, but she still lingered in the shadows. It was enough to satisfy the inner child who loved playing dress-up and pretending to be something she wasn’t.

“I am, and I think there’s part of you that agrees with me.” He unfolded his napkin and placed it in his lap as the first course came out from the kitchen. “In the meantime, perhaps you can drop a few hints on how to sneak something past Gideon.”

“Thinking of playing one of your practical jokes on the Kid?”

Gabe grinned. “Naturally.”

***

Gideon closed the front door of his villa and pressed his forehead against the wall.
Please don’t let her have followed me up here.

Dinner had been a level of torture Dante forgot to include in his seven levels of Hell. Mackinzie was a special kind of clueless. Correction—
vapid
,
dense
,
stupid
, or just plain
in denial
all came to mind when describing her.
Self-absorbed
would be a close second. It took him almost half an hour to convince her that he was not interested in doing anything with her off the set, and even then, he didn’t think it had sunk into that airhead skull of hers based on the seductive good night she’d given him.

It made him appreciate Sarah’s intelligence all the more. His mother’s phone call had come right when he was about to lose it. Of course, he spent another half hour reassuring his mom that everything was fine and then listening to her go on and on about her dog Jasper, his brothers, Ben and Hailey’s new son, and a hundred other things.

He pushed back from the wall and went in search of her.

But the only other person in the villa was Raul.

“Did Sarah come back?” he asked the bodyguard.

“Haven’t seen her.”

Gideon cursed under his breath and pulled out his phone. He’d expected her to be waiting for him to return, not off somewhere in Las Vegas. When he tried calling her, it went to voice mail. His pulse doubled. Red always answered her phone. Images of her lying dead in an alley flashed through his mind, and he was about to have Raul send out a search party after her when his phone beeped. He read the message on the screen from Sarah.

Having dinner with Gabe. Will be home soon
.

His panic flowed into another guttural emotion he had no desire to experience.

Jealousy.

He tried to console himself with rational thoughts. Red was single. She had every right to have dinner with Gabe Harrison. No one had any claim on her. She was free to do whatever she wanted. But those rational thoughts did little to douse the fire burning in the center of his stomach.

So he grabbed a beer from the fridge and nursed it until the front door opened.

Sarah came into the living room, pulling one of her long, white gloves off. She skidded to a halt when she spotted him. “Did your mom bail you out?”

“Yes, but at a cost. She talked my ear off.”

“You need to talk to your mom more anyway.” She laid her things down on the table and opened a bottle of water. “But other than that, how was dinner?”

“I don’t know if I’ll be able to make it through the film without shaking her.” He took a long swig of his beer. “It’s bad enough I have to pretend to be in love with her character.”

“It’s called
acting
for a reason.”

“Then this performance should earn me an Oscar nod.” He set his beer down and approached her. “What about you?”

She didn’t look at him as she asked, “What about me?”

“How did you happen to run into Gabe?”

“He was outside the restaurant.”

Odds were ten to one that it was more than just a coincidence. “And how was dinner with him?”

“Nice.”

He fought the urge to kiss her in such a way that would make her forget about every man but him. “Nice?”

“Yes. Nice.” She finally turned to him. “He’s in the Nobu villa, and he had one of the chefs make us dinner.”

Dinner
he
should’ve been having with her, not Gabe. “And then?”

“And then I came home.”

He wanted to believe that everything had passed as innocently as she described, but he’d seen the way Gabe was checking her out last night. The fact that he’d been waiting outside the restaurant to poach her for the evening made him wonder if Mackinzie was in league with him. After all, it was twice now that she’d monopolized his attention at dinner, allowing Gabe to swoop in and rescue Sarah.

She tightened the cap on her water bottle. “Are we still on for sunrise yoga?”

“Sure.” He would need the calm before the storm, especially since tomorrow’s schedule included scenes with Mackinzie.

“Great,” she said with a genuine smile that erased all his negativity. “I’ll see you then. Good night.”

He watched her disappear into her bedroom and wished he could join her. Instead, he finished off his beer and crawled into his king-size bed, alone. Every time he closed his eyes, he was haunted by dreams of Sarah leaving him for Gabe. And by the time his alarm went off, he discovered a new resolution.

He needed to make Sarah fall in love with him before he lost her to someone else.

Chapter Seven

Gideon was ready to hurl. He’d been stuck shooting the same love scene with Mackinzie for the last four hours. Normally, a ten-minute scene should only need maybe two or three takes, but Mackinzie kept messing up her lines. Of course, it always came after he had to endure some intense kissing.

Correction—what
she
considered kissing. It was more her sticking her tongue in his mouth and flopping it around like one of those inflatable dancing balloon men. He couldn’t wait for Karl, the director, to call, “Cut.” The second he heard that blessed word, he pushed Mackinzie away and wiped his mouth.

His co-star flopped back on the bed with a satisfied grin. “Mmm…I just love kissing you, Gideon.”

He wished he could say likewise, but he feared the repercussions if he told her the truth. Instead, he looked to Karl. “Was that good enough?”

Karl rubbed his chin and stared at the computer screen before shaking his head. “Nope. Give me some chemistry, guys.”

“I’m doing my best,” Mackinzie said with a pout. “It’s not my fault Gideon’s not playing along.”

He dug his fingers into his palms and tried sending a silent SOS to Karl. When he couldn’t get the director’s attention, he turned to the man standing next to him.

Gabe Harrison.

His fellow actor winked and nudged the director. “Why don’t we call it a day? I have a feeling the Kid will be fresh and ready to go in the morning.”

Gideon’s skin burned.
How does Gabe get off calling me “Kid”? Only Red calls me that
.

“You may have a point, Gabe. These two have run this scene to death.” Karl lifted his baseball cap and ran his fingers through his thinning hair. “Okay, we wrap this scene first thing in the morning, and then move forward. Got it?”

“Absolutely.” Gideon grabbed his robe and threw it on over the underwear he’d been wearing all afternoon. Right now, all he wanted was to get away from Mackinzie before she suggested they have more “rehearsal time.” And have a nice, hot shower to scrub off all traces of her.

He had just pulled on his jeans when a knock sounded at his dressing room door. He held his breath and offered a silent prayer it wasn’t Mackinzie. “Who is it?”

“Gabe.”

He released his breath with a whoosh and finished buttoning his jeans. “Come in.”

“Tough day out there, Kid.” Gabe leaned against the doorway, his arms crossed over his chest.