Hidden Spark (Dark Magic Enforcer Book 6) (23 page)

Kate was still on a high from whatever it was Madge had given her, but she didn't seem like she felt keen on sharing the details so I didn't ask. Instead, I asked something else entirely.

"Kate?" I said nervously.

"Yes? What's wrong?"

"Um, nothing. But I'm curious about something." My stomach twisted in knots as I tried to figure out how best to ask a question I'd pondered probably numerous times a day for five years.

"Ask away," she said, looking at me curiously, and damn sexily, too.

"Can vampires have children?"

She turned serious in a moment, and sad. "Why now, Faz? Why do you ask this now?"

"It's been playing on my mind. Ever since Tokyo, finding out that Rikka was Kimiko's son. I said I didn't believe her, as vampires can't have kids, but she just laughed and called me a silly little boy or something like that."

"You never said."

"I know. But as far as I'm aware it's true. Everyone has always told me vampires cannot have children. And I've certainly never heard of any of them having kids, not a single one. Was Kimiko lying? I don't think she was, but..." I turned to Kate and I knew I shouldn't have brought the subject up. I'm such an idiot at times and now I'd made her cry.

"Kate, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, forget I said anything. It was stupid of me." I focused on my driving, subject closed if it was going to upset her. It had gnawed at me, nagged at my mind. So much I'd thought to be true wasn't—was this just another lie I'd been told by Rikka? But it went beyond him, I'd genuinely never heard of any vamps having kids. If they did would they be vampire? Did they just die? I had no clue.

"I want to talk about it, I know it's something we've never discussed. I didn't think you wanted children?"

"Honestly? I don't even know if I do. But I know that if you did, and could, then I would adore them, worship them, and love them as much as I do you."

"Oh, Faz." Kate burst into tears then, great floods of them, and I went from feeling bad to downright despicable. Me and my big mouth. I guess that told me all I needed to know. That no, she couldn't. That vampires were unable to have babies.

She wiped her face and smiled a sad smile at me. "You are such a good man, you know that, right?"

"Me!? I don't think I am. Look at the trouble I cause. I just got you dropped into a pool of lava, that's not really something to earn me any brownie points."

"Ah, but it is. Because you saved us, looked out for us. And it wasn't your fault. You help people, you help me."

"Oh, well, thanks. Does this mean I get some hot sex later?"

"Faz!" Kate checked Mithnite to make sure he wasn't awake, and whispered, "You bet it does. But as for children, then I can't, or don't want to, or a mix of many things. Oh, I don't know." She sounded confused and hurt.

"Try explaining it."

"Okay. The maternal instinct has gone. I simply don't really feel motherly. But it goes beyond that. A true vampire is a selfish thing, and the virus changes you, right?" I nodded. "Well, I'm fighting it, and I still care, but inside I'm not the same. I think it's a hormonal thing, but I have changed. My body has put my safety, my future, above all else, meaning the will to procreate has faded. I don't ovulate, Faz, haven't since the start of all this."

"So the virus just switches off the ability even if you wanted to?"

"I guess. Maybe it messes with your head, too, or maybe it's just because the hormones work differently and I don't ovulate, then I no longer want children. It's difficult to explain, but what I've been told is that vampires cannot have children. Not normal vampires, anyway."

"But Kimiko wasn't normal, was she?"

"Nope, she was a bitch."

"Kate! Okay, she was. So it was the magic she had, the things she learned. She changed all this, gave herself back the power to become pregnant?"

"That's what I've been told. There are others, and, of course, the men are fine, which is always the case. Men can have children with Regulars or even Hidden human, but not other vampires as the females cannot produce children unless they are very powerful with magic from the Empty, not blood magic. And vampires don't take the time to learn magic like that, it's not in their nature. They are vampires and they don't care about any magic but blood magic."

"Damn, that is so messed up. I'm sorry I asked, I didn't mean to upset you. That must be awful. Um, is it?" Damn, now I was probably just making it worse than ever.

"I don't know," she wailed, and then she really broke down. "I don't know if it's awful as I don't even know if I do want children or if it's just because of what I am that makes me think I don't. If I could change things so I was normal, so I could find out, then I would. I'm sorry, I'm no good now, not a proper woman."

"Don't you ever say that again," I snapped, turning to face her for a moment. "You are the most amazing, beautiful, smart, strong woman I have ever known. Well, maybe apart from Grandma if you leave out the beautiful bit," I added, making her smile, "so don't ever sell yourself short. Okay?"

"Okay. But do you think you would want children, if we could?"

"I don't know, Kate, but what I do know is that I want you, and you're more than enough for me."

"Thank you."

We drove the rest of the way in silence, and I pretended to focus on the road even though all I could think of was Kate and how terrible it must be to have something like that taken away from you. To be unsure of your own mind or body because something had changed inside because of a choice you made and you were now stuck with it. Forever. And forever is a very long time.

Maybe there was a way? Kimiko had found it, why couldn't we? I still didn't know if I wanted the responsibility of fatherhood, but I sure as hell wanted Kate to know if she wanted to be a mother. Okay, maybe a part of me did want to have a bunch of little menaces running about, but hell, what kind of life would that be? Mummy and Daddy could be dead at any moment, then they'd be alone, like I was. Like Kate was.

Maybe that's why it hurt all the more, or... You know what? Sometimes being alive is a real struggle, and trust me, it doesn't get any easier the older you get. It just gets more confusing as there's more crap to think about and stress over.

We were home.

And boy were we hungry.

On the Road. Again

The first thing we did was take turns showering while Kate put several homemade curries from the freezer on the stove to heat through, only stopping because she ran out of pans. The act of getting clean was both a blessing and a shock. I felt refreshed and more part of the living than the dead, but it also showed just how abused my body was when I wiped away the steam and took a look at myself in the mirror.

The others were the same. All of us were black and blue and hurt all over, no amount of magic able to take away all the blemishes and the aches and pains, not that anyone apart from Kate seemed to have much left, anyway. She still looked hot, and I really didn't want to head back out. I'd much rather go to bed, but such is the life of a dark magic enforcer. Oh, the sacrifices I make.

I wandered around in my boxer shorts as I didn't want to go out with my suit stinking of curry, and nobody objected after the whole naked thing.

None of us said anything about the wreck that was our floor, and at least the hole had vanished, even if it had taken the table and chairs with it. So we sat on garden furniture with plates on our laps, and we ate, and ate, and kept on eating until all the curry and rice was gone and then we hit the ice-cream, followed by coffee, some cheese and crackers. Finally we were done.

Feeling full, feeling tired, mostly feeling like a bad boyfriend for bringing up a hurtful subject with Kate, I reluctantly went upstairs and got dressed. I'd forgotten how quickly I burned through suits—literally—when on the job, so made a mental note to hunt down some new, to me, ones. Pretty soon I'd have to start on a new era. Suits from the nineteen sixties would be hard to find if I stayed working.

Mithnite didn't argue when I told him to stay, poor kid was hardly listening anyway and ready for sleep. I kissed Kate, told her to be careful, and she nodded—we both knew there was no way she could rest in her current state, and after our conversation it didn't need to be spelled out that the first thing she would do was to find Oskari or another old vampire and find out the truth about the whole baby thing.

I was out the door, in the car, and heading back to Cardiff about a lifetime too soon, but there was an evil man to be stopped and a boss to report to.

*

"You look worse than I feel, and I fell into a lava lake and flew on a dragon and—"

"Don't rub my nose in it. Just because you had all the fun," said Dancer, adjusting his slim black tie and tidying his hair.

"Fun! Are you nuts?"

"Don't play the innocent with me, Spark. I know you love this kind of thing."

Perhaps, but I'd rather skip the boiling and burning bits, I'm pretty sure about that. "Let's just say it's been intense and leave it at that. Still no news about Dragon?"

"No, none." Dancer had obviously had people out looking for him and his wyrmlings, of which there were sure to be many.

"Let me fill you in on what I discovered. I met his wife, or I guess you could say ex-wife."

"You what!? I thought she died a long time ago. She's here, in Cardiff?"

"Oh yes, she's running the place next door to Madge's."

"Delilah? That beautiful woman who serves the lovely paninis?" Dancer licked his thin lips at the mention of food.

"You've eaten there? Don't let Madge find out, she's, er, not quite what we think she is?"

"Huh? And anyway, I was careful. No way would I let her see me. I went in disguise. Damn, says a lot about us when two men so powerful are afraid to eat a sandwich because of a grumpy cafe owner. I'm the damn Head, I should be able to eat where I want."

"Tell that to Madge."

"I'd rather you did it. Okay, she's his wife. And? Does she know where he is?"

"No, but she set me straight on a few things. Like, for one, Dragon is a liar. He didn't create shifters, they're natural."

"But I always thought—"

I held up a hand. "There's more. There's history we don't know about. We always assumed he was called Dragon as a nickname, his Hidden name, right?" Dancer nodded, allowing me to talk. "Well, it's because of her. They got together, right after he first learned about magic, and she helped him to advance. They were married, she taught him things, and for a while, in a place like the dwarven realm, they were king and queen."

"Of what?"

"Of the realm, I guess." I shrugged, knowing there were still missing pieces. "But get this, he was known as the dragon's King. Not Dragon King, the dragon's King. Because, drum roll please, Delilah, beauty of the wondrous paninis, is a dragon shifter, and the only dragon that still lives. Apparently all dragons are shifters. The first, just a few, and their offspring, bore the shifters, but our two dragons, they never had kids."

"Hells bells! So he's a fraud as well as a maniac?"

"Sort of. He's still the first man to learn magic, to bring it to us, master the Empty and all that jazz. But as far as I can tell, most of his life after that initial awakening has been spent arguing with his wife and them playing chase-me. Her locking him up, him escaping, and on and on it goes. He did a runner a few hundred years ago and holed up with the dwarves to recuperate and got stuck, then heard about me and now here we are. Screwed."

"So she's looking for him, too? This just adds another complication. And we have to get him, Spark, and soon. We can't have these wyrmlings coming over from everywhere, it will be bedlam." Dancer looked nervous, not just the way I'd expect, but as if something else was going on.

"If I'm going to at least attempt to deal with him you need to be honest with me, boss," I said, showing respect. "What haven't you told me about this."

Dancer leaned back in his chair and sighed, face gaunt. He'd been stressing way too much and when he's stressed he burns through his scant fuel reserves as fast as I do when I'm chasing down monsters. At this rate he'd be a skeleton in a few days.

He needed to unburden and what he said next made me see why.

An Admission

"You know I told you about an, er, incident, way back when?"

"You didn't tell me about it, you said... Can we talk about this here? You sure it's all right?" No way did I want to say anything that would risk Dancer's privacy and cover story.

"It's fine, we're protected. When the doors close, the room is sealed. I got some good wizards to ramp up my personal security so I can have private conversations without risk of eavesdroppers."

"Okay, good idea. So, you said that something happened years ago, and you killed someone, and left. But you also said it would all be fine now, that those involved would be long gone and you were in the clear."

"I, er, may have exaggerated a little."

"Exaggerated what?"

"About it all being okay. The people I had a run in with, the people I got involved in, and it was by accident, I swear, they were wyrmlings. Right nut cases, totally on another planet kind of bonkers, and they caused me no end of trouble until I sort of killed a few of them."

"I thought you said it was one?" I was getting a very bad feeling about where this was headed, and I already had a very bad feeling about the whole thing.

"Forty."

"Forty! You killed forty wyrmlings? Hell."

"No, that was how many I left maimed, as a warning to leave me alone. I killed... Let's just say it was a few more than that."

"And this is why you don't want them coming over here? Because some of them might know who you are?"

"It's too late for that. What I don't want is any more of them coming."

"What's happened?"

"This morning, cleaning up after the incident at the club, some of them got away. Some of them saw me. They were old ones, from Romania. I recognized one, a nasty guy even by our standards, and I'm worried."