His Californian Countess (8 page)

He wasn’t trying to be dishonest by holding back his suspicions from Amber. He just didn’t want to scare her witless before it was necessary. What he
did
want was to know more about what had made her the person she was.

Unable to stand the strained silence any longer, Jamie stood and moved toward her. The sky behind her silhouette was painted with streaks of bright pinks and purples against a canvas of deep blue.

After drinking in her profile for a long moment, Jamie approached her from behind. “I hope you understand that I’m a different person now. And that I answered your questions as honestly as I could no matter how badly they made me look.”

Now behind her, he settled his hands on her shoulders. Even though she stiffened, sultry sensations curled
through his entire body as they did every time he touched her. He was always left burning for more, but her apprehension made him just as determined not to push her too fast.

There was a delicate balance between letting her know how highly he regarded her and how much he desired her without making her feel trapped and pressured by their hasty marriage.

“You were going to San Francisco to serve as a governess? Can you tell me why a beautiful, young woman would go so far from home to help raise someone else’s children? Why am I so fortunate that you’re here at all?”

“I told you. Helena looks like—”

“Not what are you doing on the
Young America.
Why aren’t you married with children of your own?”

“My parents died of fever when I was six,” she answered, her voice distant and monotone. “I remember how much they loved each other. My aunt and uncle raised me after that. They were also deeply in love until the day she died. That was the only kind of marriage I wanted.” She stopped and took a deep breath. “I was to be married a bit over a year ago. Joseph was a mineworker. The week before our wedding there was a cave-in. He was killed. After that, I didn’t want to love anyone. So I didn’t want marriage, either. I’d lost enough already. But I adore children. I decided that as a governess I could be with children day and night. That was as close as I thought I’d ever get to being a mother.”

Ironic. He’d been competing with a miner for Helena’s regard, as well, but this miner was dead. Most likely a saint in her eyes. And he’d competed with his
father’s grief over his mother’s death until death won. A spike of anger rushed through him; he tried to put it away, but he couldn’t completely suppress that inner battle. “So my adventurer was really running away to hide from life.”

She rounded on him, her gaze furious, her little pointed chin notched high. “That isn’t—”

“It
is
true,” he broke in. “You know how I know? What do you think drove me to come to America dragging along my infant and my old nurse? Here I didn’t have to face my cousin. Nor worry about what my uncle would do next. Or hear one lecture after another from relatives and other peers on the importance of securing the succession to the title. None of them want to think of Oswald as head of the family. So I ran to America as fast as the wind could carry me. What a pair we are, Pixie.”

She sighed and dropped her chin, bumping her forehead on his chest. “And what a pickle we are in together, Jamie. What an awful pickle.”

Jamie tipped her face to his and cupped her cheeks in his palms. “Not at all. This thing between us could be wonderful. You just have to let go and enjoy.” With no thought of plans to the contrary or their consequences, he leaned down and sealed his lips to hers.

She put her hand to his chest and pressed. His heart beneath her hand sank in defeat. But before he could retreat, she moaned at the back of her throat and her hand moved upward to his neck. His cheek. Jamie deepened the kiss and wrapped his arms around her, pulling her close.

He slid his tongue along the seam of her lips and she gasped, granting him the chance to taste of her sweet
depths. Blood pooled low and hard in his body. He craved more than the intimacy she had granted his mouth. But he knew that couldn’t happen.

Before he did something he shouldn’t, Jamie gentled his hold. Softened the kiss. Traced tiny sipping kisses across her jaw to her ear then into her hair.

And finally, he managed to step back.

It was a near thing when he saw her wide, dark eyes staring at him. And for once he thought he knew what she was thinking. She didn’t know why he’d stopped, but she knew it had nothing to do with where they were. He could see that she was still willing to surrender, but he didn’t want her defeated.

He wanted her because she was victorious. When she’d conquered her fear for her heart. When she could admit she loved him. And only then. Maybe by then he’d find he could say the same thing. He doubted it, but a man could hope. If anyone could unfreeze his heart it would be Amber.

He could read the confusion and the question in her azure gaze.

“I stopped because you’re not ready for more than stolen kisses no matter how much I wish you were. I won’t rob you of the courtship I promised you. Just being alone like this is more than a proper courtship would allow. I want you to believe in us. I want you willing to risk that heart you keep hidden behind a wall of fear.” He said nothing about his own fear. That wasn’t her problem. It was his.

She swallowed hard and he stared, fascinated with the delicacy of the narrow column of her neck.

But her next question snapped him back to reality. “What if that risk isn’t something I can handle?”

Jamie forced the future away. His need away.
Live for the little moments,
he told himself.
Lure her with the truth of how perfect you are for each other.
And in a blinding flash he saw what he had not before. He needed to court and woo her as much as she needed him to do it. He needed what he’d never had. He kissed her forehead, then her nose. “My adventurer, too afraid to reach out and take the life she deserves? Not possible.”

“But you said I was running away, not going on an adventure.”

He smiled. “Did I? How foolish of me! We’re both on an adventure. The most dangerous and wonderful kind of all.”

She still looked confused, which made him smile even more. “Because going around the Cape is dangerous?” she asked. “But I didn’t know how dangerous it could be when I thought up this trip.”

“It isn’t the route or even the trip I’m talking about. Our journey toward each other is going to be life’s greatest adventure. Now, since neither of us seems to be very hungry, suppose we go up on deck and take in the full panorama of that beautiful sunset.”

He gave her his arm and led her out of the stateroom, but it was her beauty he’d been drinking in and not the multihued sky being reflected on the surface of the ocean. And that would never change.

Not even when her blond hair was white and her smooth skin wrinkled with age. In fact, after all those years together, he’d wager he’d still have eyes only for her.

June 29, 1876—Cape May, New Jersey

M
eara ran across the porch, hopping up and down in excitement. “Look, Mimm, Da’s come to see me!”

There was no way her Jamie could be there unless the ship had needed to turn around and that rarely happened, Miriam Trimble thought, frowning. She pushed herself out of her rocking chair and walked to the railing of the porch on the second floor off the side of the house.

Mimm’s head liked to spin right off when she saw
who
had come to call. “Out of the mouths of babes,” she muttered under her breath. No, it wasn’t Jamie, but that snake of a cousin of his. And if the man wasn’t Meara’s blood father, Mimm didn’t know who was.

She’d never trusted young Alexander. As far back as she remembered, he’d always had a look in his eyes that said he wasn’t telling the truth—that he was guilty of something. Still, she’d felt pity for him when he’d returned from his trip to find the woman he loved had married Jamie.

Jamie had lived with that guilt every day since.

“’Tis not your da. Probably just a tinker,” she lied. “And right now, my little lamb, it’s time for your afternoon rest. Hop up on the chaise inside and I’ll tuck you and dolly up for a nice bit o’ sleep.”

When Meara was born, Alexander’d shown up out of the blue to patch things up with Jamie. Miriam Trimble was no dummy. He’d wanted access to that child. Though Meara had been a little bit of a thing, Mimm hadn’t believed for one minute that she was a seven-month baby. She herself had given birth at seven months to a lad who hadn’t lived and he’d looked much less finished than Meara had.

Jamie had closed the subject with one hard look when Iris’s personal doctor proclaimed the tiny baby early. But nine months earlier Jamie’d not been to London yet and Alexander lived there. Not once had Jamie treated Meara as anything other than his own adored child. Her Jamie was no fool, though. He knew.

Mimm looked down at the child. Though Meara looked like Jamie, the little lamb looked even more like Alexander with her wavy blond hair only a few shades lighter than his.

And now he was in America.

The question was, why?

She closed Meara’s door and went to find out, planning as she went. He could take the girl if he had a mind. With Jamie so far away and out of touch, Alexander could go to the court, complain that she wasn’t being properly cared for and gain custody. He was blood. Miriam Trimble was nothing to the outside world but the hired help.

She met Hadley halfway up the stairs. “Where did you put him?” she asked.

Hadley’s eyebrows climbed high on his forehead. “So you saw him arrive. He’s in the front parlor. He’s wanting the earl.”

“You didn’t say where he is, did you?” she demanded.

“I have more in my brain box than that. Last I knew, his lordship wasn’t on speaking terms with his cousin.”

“Not since Iris’s funeral,” Mimm grumbled. “When that one beat my Jamie black and blue.”

“And I’d repaired what I could before you saw him. If his lordship had defended himself there’d have been a different outcome. The coward should have realized it was too easy and stopped long before he did. Therefore I saw no need to share anything with Reynolds but standing room in the parlor.” Hadley regarded her for a long moment. “Shall I have tea brought?”

“He won’t be here that long. Wait in the hall and ride to the rescue if you’re thinkin’ I need it.”

“You’re a suspicious woman, Mrs. Trimble.”

“And I’ll stay that way till there’re questions answered that never have been.”

She walked in and found Alexander by the fireplace examining a portrait Jamie’d had done of Meara last year. “Mister Reynolds, I’m right surprised to see you so far from England and here on our doorstep, no less,” she said, startling him from his study of the portrait.

He turned to face her, his expression unreadable. “Is he about? His New York neighbor gave me his direction here. I felt the need to see my cousin. It is time.”

“Have you punished him enough for being a gullible fool, then wakin’ up to his countess’s true heart, then?”

Thunder crossed the face so like Jamie’s and his jaw went hard as rock. “What are you now? The lion at the gate rather than just his nursemaid?
Is
he here?”

“I’m Meara’s nanny now as I was his. Until
someone
arranged to have me given the boot and have Jamie packed off to boarding school, then on to Edinburgh. The boy never learned a thing about how to run Adair or about the sufferin’ of its people.”

“But he did strengthen up there with all that icy-cold Scottish weather.”

She gave a sharp nod. “That he did, though I’m sure the plan was quite the opposite. He fooled the lot of you.”

Alexander smirked. “I dare say being so far from home kept him out of quite a lot of trouble.”

“And you would know about that as you was probably the instigator of his every scrape at Adair.”

Alexander covered his heart. “Or I was merely there to rescue him. My father was always equally angry at us both so I see no need to dwell on who was the follower. I understand Jamie has become quite the leader these days.”

“And he went off this morn to do more of it. Back to New York. Your train must’ve passed his,” she lied happily. “He plans to be gone a week or more. Perhaps you could find him at home in New York.” She thought for a minute on how to put him off the scent of Jamie’s true travel plans. “Or he may stay at one of the hotels there. He said he might so as not to need the whole house opened just for him.”

Alexander raked a hand through his hair, but she noticed his other hand was in a fist at his side. “Are you sure? I really must see him.”

“As sure as I can be. Busy as a beaver that one is. Restorin’ Adair’s coffers of what was stole,” she added pointedly and noted that Alexander Reynolds looked
quite uncomfortable at the mention of all the funds that went missing during the years his father had control before Jamie came of age and gave the man the boot.

Alexander tried to hide his discomfort with a smile, but she’d seen through him for some time now. He knew his father was a thief and he’d probably benefited as much as Oswald Reynolds.

“I knew Jamie would make a wonderful father,” he said. “Meara will have quite a dowry someday.” He turned to look up at the portrait. “She looks exactly like our grandmother. I must see her while I’m here. Fetch her, will you?”

Not while Miriam Trimble had any say in it! “She’s restin’ just now. Was quite ill with scarlet fever in May, poor lamb.”

He spun to face her, looking a mite pale. “What? Is she left with any lasting ill effects?”

“Not so we’ve noticed. ’Tis why we came down here to New Jersey. So she could regain her strength in the sea air.”

“I’ll see her later, then? You do have room for me, I assume. I’m sure my cousin would like me to stay here since she’s been so ill and he left her with only the help.”

Mimm stiffened. She was more than the help to Jamie and Alexander knew it. “You best seek him out in New York City. I can’t be extendin’ his hospitality without his express say so. When last you left Adair, my Jamie was bloodied and bruised.”

Guilt flooded Alexander’s eyes as he looked away. “Can you at least tell me what hotel he would recommend here on the island?”

“When we came here last year, we stayed at
Columbia House between Ocean and Decatur Streets. ’Tis a very
aristocratic
hotel. You wouldn’t feel at home anywhere else.”

Alexander stared at her for a long moment, then growled, “I’ll be by in the morning to see Meara.”

“She sleeps in these days, ’til at least eleven, still gainin’ her strength as she is,” she told him. Just late enough that he’d miss the last train leaving town.

His lips pressed into a straight line. “Expect me then. You won’t keep me from seeing my…my niece.” He turned to stalk off.

Good riddance, she thought, as he charged out the door, stalking past Hadley still standing guard in the hall.

“And we’ll be on the seven-thirty train out o’ here,” she told Jamie’s right-hand man. “We have preparations to make. Have someone watch that snake of a cousin and you get over to the rail yard and order the railcar readied. Mr. Palmer writes that the house in San Francisco is all ready. We’ll head to California in the morning. I don’t want to be facing that snake again without his lordship available.

“Make sure to arrange for the lamb’s pony to come along, as well. And wire Mr. Palmer to keep quiet on our destination. Make sure he doesn’t let on where any of us have headed.”

Hadley snapped a smart salute. “I hear and obey, little general.”

Mimm smiled. “See that you do. We swore to protect her and I mean to see we do.”

Even against her real father. It hadn’t slipped Mimm’s notice that if it had been Jamie killed instead of Iris that day six years ago, Alexander would have had
his lady love, their daughter and eventually Jamie’s title. His uncle was a demon and his son was more than likely his true spawn.