Horse With No Name (27 page)

And then there was the matter of her
estrangement from her family. She hadn't heard from or written to
her parents since she'd arrived in Horse. She wasn't ready to reach
out to them yet, but she knew that day would come soon. Her
righteous indignation could only keep her warm for so long. When
she thought about it dispassionately, she knew that it wasn't her
father's fault that the law schools in Ontario didn't accept women.
And yet, she still couldn't help feeling hurt by his dismissal of
her idea that she try to be the first. She had the mind for it, and
he had the financial resources.

The biggest thing that was holding her back
from reaching out to her parents was that her father had laughed at
her. Julia's eyes stung at the memory. He was the person whose
opinion mattered more to her than any other, and he laughed when
she shared her dream with him. That had been his instinctive
reaction; to think that a career in law for his daughter was a
joke.

Julia sniffed and dug around in her coat
pocket for her handkerchief.

Her mother might not be the most affectionate
person on the planet, but Julia knew she loved her. And her
father...well...he was a man of his time and one who was set in his
ways. Though she wasn't ready, a still, small place inside Julia
told her that she would have to make a choice between loving him
for who he was or being permanently angry that he wasn't who she
wanted him to be. The discovery of Hunter’s true identity had also
taught her this; people are who they are. We can accept them or
not. But our lack of acceptance doesn’t change them.

She blew her nose and wiped her eyes as she
walked. Looking up, she realized she was passing Merrick's office.
She knew while she had been trying to help Hunter that she’d
stepped on Merrick's toes. She had been taking her confusion and
frustration about her life out on him by pushing where it wasn't
her place; using the mystery of Hunter’s beating to distract
herself from her own problems. Including the danger that she had
been awakened to when the two men outside the dance had tried to
attack her. Considering all she had done, Merrick had been more
than gracious. She reflected that he probably should have thrown
her in jail. She also knew that perhaps it was time to apologize to
the man.

She crossed the street and stepped up onto
the wooden sidewalk outside Merrick's office. The door didn't move
when she turned the handle. Covering her eyes with her gloved hands
she peered through the glass and could see the office was dark and
empty.

***

Christopher was alone when Julia entered the
general store. He was behind the counter, unpacking a box of cans
onto a shelf. Julia noticed he was whistling to himself and found
herself cheered to hear it.

"Miss Thom!" he said, his wide smile
brightening Julia's day slightly. Without being asked, he knew what
she was looking for. "Betty is in the back. She'll be happy to see
you."

Julia found her friend sitting at the wooden
table in the storeroom, a pair of trousers in her lap and a sewing
needle in her hand. Betty looked up when she heard Julia approach.
She had pins pinched between her lips, which she pulled out and
stuck into a small cushion on the table.

"Ahoy there," Betty said, grinning.

"Ahoy," Julia grinned back and sat down
opposite Betty, enjoying the fact that they could joke about her
adventure in Lake Okanagan. "You're making Christopher a suit?"

"This is for Mr. Hunter."

"Again? You'll be entirely responsible for
his new wardrobe."

"I can't have him going off to Kelowna with
only one suit."

"You're a good woman, Elizabeth
Mitchell."

"Tell my husband, will you?"

"He seemed pretty cheerful when I came in.
How are things on the financial front?"

"Actually, not too bad. I shouldn't disparage
him. He's making a real effort to collect the money we're owed. He
even got Horace Piling to pay off his debt entirely." Betty glanced
up from her sewing and looked pleased. "Granted, it was only five
dollars, but still. He was firm about it."

Julia was happy for her friend. "Were you
there at the time?"

"I was here, in the back. I'm not sure if
Christopher knew I was listening. I'm giving him the benefit of the
doubt and assuming he didn't know and that he pressed Horace of his
own accord."

"So, things are looking up? You may not have
to live in a tent in my backyard."

"Not right away, anyway." Betty pulled a knot
in the thread she was using and reached for the scissors to cut it
off. Task completed, she poked her needle in the pin cushion and
held the trousers aloft. "What do you think?"

"I think they look a hell of a lot more
comfortable than the dress I'm wearing."

Thirty-five

"I'm not going to be
able to get you to stop interfering, am I?"

Julia, startled, looked up from her desk
where she was making notes for a lesson.

Jack Merrick was standing in the doorway to
the classroom. She hadn't heard him come up the stairs. He pulled
his hat off and stepped into the room. It was the first time she'd
seen him since Gerard Anker's trial, a week ago.

After not finding him at his office the other
day, Julia went to the smithy, where she found Walt's head bent in
concentration over what looked like a fireplace poker. He was
forming pieces of iron at the top of the handle into what looked to
Julia like a pinecone. It was beautiful and more delicate than
anything she'd seen Walt work on before. She waited, not wanting to
disturb him. When he dunked the handle in the bucket of water by
his feet she stepped forward and he noticed her for the first
time.

She pointed at the poker. "That's lovely,
Walt."

The big Irishman shrugged, and Julia thought
he looked embarrassed. "It's nothing. Just a little something I'm
playing at."

"Well, I think it's beautiful."

Walt's blue-green eyes softened a little bit.
"How can I help, Lass?"

"I'm looking for Merrick."

"Ah," Walt nodded, and looked back down at
his piece of artwork. "He's gone."

"Gone?"

"Gone hunting. He needed a few days off. The
judge told him to take some time for himself. Mayor Billy's looking
after the office when he's not at the bank. Hopefully we won't have
a stagecoach robbery or anything like that while Merrick's on
leave."

Julia stayed and chatted with Walt for a
while, but her mind was elsewhere. She was hurt that Merrick had
left town without telling her. Not that he had any obligation to.
Despite their differences of opinion, especially lately, she
considered him to be her friend. Perhaps he didn't feel the same
way about her.

She left the forge and walked home. Snow had
fallen the day before and the town looked like it was wrapped in
cotton wool. Julia pulled her coat and scarf tighter around
herself, feeling lonelier than she had since arriving in Horse.

So, when Merrick showed up in her classroom
several days later, she was startled, relieved and also
apprehensive.

He walked into the room, looking like a giant
among the small school desks. He walked up the left side of the
room and settled his bottom on the window sill closest to Julia's
desk.

"How was your hunting trip?" she asked.

Merrick nodded. "Fine. Got an elk. That'll
keep me for the winter."

Now it was Julia's turn to nod. She felt
anxious, and the ferocity of the feeling surprised her. She began
to speak, but Merrick got in ahead of her.

"Here's what I need to know. Were you always
like this? Torturing the local constabulary?" Julia thought this
was an attempt at a joke, though the question sounded not-quite
light-hearted.

Julia felt her defenses coming up, despite
the weak attempt at humor. She pushed her chair out from her desk
and turned in her seat, looking at him. "Do you feel tortured?"

"Somewhat. You see, technically I'm the one
who's supposed to be solving the crimes." The look on Merrick's
face was one she had not seen before. He looked calm but also a bit
sad.

Julia took a breath and remembered her new
expectation of herself to remember that she was not the only person
in the world with concerns and beliefs about the way things should
work. "I apologize," she said. "I have been putting my nose in
where it doesn't belong."

The constable stretched his long legs out
straight in front of him and crossed them at the ankles.

Julia braced herself for a lecture, and
perhaps even the threat of charging her with interfering with an
investigation. Instead Merrick surprised her, "It must be
frustrating to not be able to do the type of work you want to."

Julia was more stunned than she'd been in
recent memory. To her mortification, her eyes began to sting. "What
on earth made you say that?"

"Walt gave me a bit of a talking to the other
day." Merrick smiled grimly at the memory. "He suggested perhaps
I've been too hard on you."

Julia cleared her throat. "Not really. I
shouldn't be interfering with your work. You were right to tell me
to step back."

"I might have been right in the eyes of the
law, but I wasn't being a good friend. And that matters to me as
much as being a constable. I think..." Merrick paused, and took a
breath. He started again, "I had lots of time to think about things
while I was away. And as much as I hate to admit it, I think my ego
was bruised."

Julia breathed out a little sigh.

"Hard to believe, I know," Merrick continued,
"we men are fragile creatures, Julia Thom. You're a force to be
reckoned with and I think you need to be a bit patient with me. I'm
just going to need some time to adjust to your...habits."

Now it was Julia's turn to smile, though hers
was tinged with sadness. "I promise to try to stay out of your way
from now on."

"Please don't."

She looked at him with questions in her eyes.
"What do you mean?"

"You mentioned the other day that you wanted
to be a lawyer."

Julia nodded.

"And you obviously have a knack for
untangling puzzles. I...I don't quite know how to say this. I'm not
a very eloquent man. All this trouble with James Hunter made me see
something I hadn't seen before. It can't be easy to live a life
that's not your own. It's not Hunter's fault he was born in the
wrong type of body. There's a lot about him that I don't
understand, but what I do believe is that he didn't choose the
circumstances he finds himself in. And, in a similar way, it's not
your fault you weren't allowed to go to law school because you're a
woman."

Julia nodded again. She was struck dumb by
the nature and direction of this conversation. The room almost swam
around her. Outside she heard a crow call in a raspy voice.

Merrick continued. "I supposed what I'm
saying is, I'm going to try very hard not to object so strenuously
to your assistance from now on, should it be needed. I'm buried in
paperwork and administrative duties so often that another set of
eyes and ears will only make my job a little easier. Does that
appeal to you at all?"

The schoolteacher nodded. She didn't trust
her voice enough to speak.

Merrick continued. "All I ask is that you try
not to be too obvious about it when you're helping me. And that you
keep me apprised of what you know and what you're doing."

Julia nodded again. She was having trouble
getting enough breath into her lungs. Not since the last time she
and her father had had a debate about one of his cases in his home
office had she felt so validated. She looked at Merrick and smiled,
wishing she could find the words to tell him how much she
appreciated that he could see her.

He continued. "And I also want to say I'm
sorry."

Julia swallowed, frowning at him, confused.
"Why?"

"I was hard on you the other night at
Finnegan's. All I could see was that you were trying to do my job.
I owe you an apology."

"I'm not trying to do your..." she began.

Merrick cut her off. "I know that. You're
just trying to help. I can see that now. It's who you are. You're
not interfering to spite me, or to prove me wrong. You want the
same results I do." He stood up off the window sill and put his hat
on.

Julia could hardly fathom what had just
happened. She sat with a dazed expression on her face.

The constable walked down the length of the
room and stopped at the doorway. He turned back to look at her.
"C'mon. Walt and I want to buy you a pint at Finnegan's. We need to
celebrate a closed case."

Julia stood up. She took her coat off the
rack in the back corner of the room and pulled it on. Merrick held
the front door open for her and closed it behind her as they walked
down the steps.

Collecting herself, Julia said, "What
happened?"

"What do you mean?"

Julia reached the ground and turned to look
at Merrick. "What brought on this change of heart?"

He thought for a moment, casting his glance
across the schoolyard. "That big Irishman said something to me the
other day that kept ringing in my ears while I was out hunting. I
couldn't get his stupid voice out of my head."

"What was that?"

"Don't tell him I gave him credit for this."
Merrick now glanced at Julia.

"I promise," she said.

Merrick took a deep breath, "He said that you
and I are more alike than we are different." There was a slight
pause and then he concluded, "And I think he's right."

Julia's heart sang a little, and she felt a
weight that she hadn't known was there lift off her chest. They
walked on, boots crunching pleasantly on the skiff of snow that
glazed the road.

She glanced sideways at Merrick and grinned
at him, the tension of the past few days and weeks breaking. "So
Walt thinks you'd look good in a dress?"