Hunter's Salvation (34 page)

She stepped back, and Vax watched as she disappeared. She was right. He was going to regret it. But he already knew that. It didn't change anything.

He heard something from the hall and looked up. The nurses were back, peering at him through the door. Probably figured he was talking to himself, and they were trying to decide whether they needed to order a psychiatric consult. He smiled bitterly. Wouldn't be a bad idea, except it was a little too late in coming. He lay in the bed, even though, thanks to Kelsey, he had the energy to stand up now.

The catheter brushed against his thigh, and he lifted the sheet, staring down at it. The hospital gown was still tangled around his waist, and he grabbed it and jerked it free. Throwing the johnny to the ground, he stared at the catheter.

Finally he looked up at the doorway. Both nurses were still there. Cocking a brow, he said, “Either of you going to take this out?”

 

H
E
made it to Nebraska.

He was tired as hell. Maybe that's what it was. When he had left the hospital, he knew it was the right thing to do. But the farther he got from Jess, the harder it was to keep convincing himself of that. So he was tired, and it weakened his resolve. Sounded like as good an excuse as any, he figured. A lot better than the fact that he just couldn't let it end this way. A lot better than admitting just how right Kelsey had been. Yeah, he been prepared for regrets. He'd regretted it even as he'd been pushing her away, and he knew he'd have to deal with it.

But Vax hadn't planned on it hurting like this, lingering with him, riding his back like some hell-born monkey.

He couldn't keep going. He wasn't going to go back and beg for forgiveness, plead with her to take him back. Hell, they'd never really had each other, so how could one of them take the other back?

Vax did have to tell her he was sorry, though. Maybe explain why he had ended it like that. Yeah. Good idea. Smooth things over, apologize, say whatever he had to say to ease the pain he'd put in her eyes. It wasn't going to completely erase the ache in his heart, but maybe he'd sleep.

The drive took too damn long. Way too long. He tried not to think about how he could have done this a few weeks ago. He'd never fly again, not unless he was in a plane. Vax didn't really care for planes.

By the time he reached Indianapolis, he'd gone nearly twenty-four hours without sleep. He was punch-drunk with exhaustion, and nervous. Nervous—it was weird, but Vax couldn't remember the last time he'd been nervous. Had nothing to do with the magick, though.

Had to do with the fact that he was standing at Jessica Warren's front door, freezing his ass off and too aware of the fact that he probably wasn't going to make it inside, not if he knocked. So maybe he shouldn't knock. Vax looked behind him. It was quiet on the street, and late, pushing eleven o'clock. The lights in Jess's house were out, although he knew she was there. Sleeping, deep and dreamless. He could sense her. At least that much hadn't changed.

He had a feeling that if he knocked, she wouldn't let him in. Vax wasn't leaving until he said what he had come here to say.

After one last look at the door, he went to his bike and retrieved a small black case from the leather pack strapped to the back. More often than not, when Vax had needed to get inside someplace, he'd used magick. But that hadn't always been possible. Any Hunter worth the name knew how to break into places. Vax might not be much of a Hunter anymore, but he figured he could still do the breaking-and-entering bit easily enough.

He kept his senses wide open as he worked. It was weird having to rely on the five human senses again. He heard a car coming, and just as it turned onto Jess's street, he heard the final little
snick
. He grabbed his tools and opened the door, closing it gently just as the car passed by her house. He didn't bother packing away the lock picks. Jess was still asleep, but he wasn't going to count on her staying that way. If she woke up before he got into her bedroom, she was likely to call the cops. He imagined that seeing him get his ass thrown in jail would be sweet revenge.

Jess didn't wake up, though. He stood in the doorway to her room, staring at her in the dark. She lay on her side, one hand drawn up. Pale blonde hair lay in a tangle around her shoulders. The moonlight streaming in turned the blonde strands to silver.

She wore a top with skinny straps, and it clung to her slender form. She sighed in her sleep and Vax tensed, waiting for her to oepn her eyes. All she did was roll over. One hand reached out, as though she were reaching for something. Or someone. His heart knotted as her fingers closed into a tight fist and she sighed again, a sad, broken little sound.

Silently he crossed the room. Should he wake her up? Let her sleep? There were bruised-looking shaodws under her eyes. She didn't take very good care of herself. It had been months since she'd had a decent night's sleep. With that on top of the hell she'd gone through recently, she had to be exhausted.

The considerate thing to do would be to leave. Come back in the morning and talk to her then. But Vax hadn't ever bothered much with doing the considerate thing. Why start now?

Instead of leaving, he took his jacket off and crossed the room. All he was going to do was lie down beside her, watch her sleep. That was all. He wouldn't even touch her. But the second he lay down, she cuddled up against him. Her fisted hand unclenched and slid across his chest, resting just above his heart. He tensed, and swore silently. Okay, so maybe this wasn't a good idea.

There was no way in hell, though, that he was going to move. She'd take care of that herself as soon as she woke up. Most likely this would be the last chance he had to touch her, or at least to have her touch him. He wasn't going to miss a second of it. If that made him more of a bastard than he already was, he could live with that.

Need, a low-level burn whenever he was near her, pulsed and flared, but he throttled it into submission. Jess sighed and tried to squirm a little closer, rubbing her cheek against his chest. Through the cotton of his T-shirt, he could feel the warmth of her skin, and he muffled a groan. This was going to be both heaven and hell. And if she didn't wake up, it was going to be a long-ass night, too.

Surprisingly enough, though, he felt sleep weighing down on him. Too heavily to fight, in fact. He felt his eyes closing. With Jess, soft and warm, pressed up against him, he stopped fighting it. A few minutes. Just a few…

 

J
ESS
was dreaming. She knew she was dreaming. She knew she needed to make herself wake up. The last thing she needed was to have another dream centered around
him
. But he felt so good against her, so right. Cotton bunched under her hands as she pushed his shirt up. She pressed her lips to his chest and felt his heart pounding with a fast, erratic beat. She wanted to see him. If she looked at him, would she wake up?

It was a risk she had to take, because
not
looking at him just didn't seem possible. She lifted her lashes and stared at him. Jess held her breath, waiting for something bad to happen. He'd disappear. She'd wake up.

Neither happened. Instead his hands closed over her bare hips and pulled her against him. The heat of his body was a sweet, erotic pleasure against her own, and for a second she wondered at how real this particular dream seemed to be. Was he…No. The arms around her felt sure and strong. It was a dream, had to be. Vax was still in the hospital and would be for a while yet.

Good. She was too damn pissed to deal with him in reality. And she was hurt. But in a dream? Oh, yeah. That was all good. She bent her head and pressed her lips to his. Her hair fell around them like a curtain, cutting off the rest of the world. Then Vax slid a hand into her hair, using it to anchor her head as he pushed inside her mouth, kissing her as though he was as starved for her as she was for him.

Not possible…Another sign she was dreaming. In reality he hadn't given a damn about her, not once he'd done his fucking job. Fury blistered through her, even here. She bit his lip as she tried to move closer. His hands moved gently over her as though he wanted to soothe the rage she felt. But Jess wasn't in the mood to be soothed. She wanted to get as close as she could, wanted to take him deep inside and never let go, never wake up—and at the same time she wanted him to hurt.

She reached between them, jerking at his jeans. The silver buckle felt oddly cool against her hands, and it resisted. She kept fumbling with it until she freed it, and then she went to work on his jeans. As she lowered the zipper, he groaned against her lips. His hand tightened on her hair, and Jess pulled away. When he reached for her, she evaded his hands, moving down his body until she could take him in her mouth. He bucked against her. She raked her teeth gently over the thick head of his cock and sucked on him.

“Fuck, Jess…” It was the first thing he'd said. No sweet, tender words, no soft apology, just those two guttural words. He arched up against her, pushing his length farther inside her mouth. Jess took as much as she could, and then she slid back up. She stared up at him through her lashes.

The words he'd said to her in the hospital came back to haunt her.
It was sex, blondie
. She lifted herself and looked down at him, snarling a little.
Sex. Just sex
…She crawled back up his body and rubbed herself against him. Through the thin silk of her panties, she could feel him. Thick, hard, and full, throbbing against her. She pushed herself up, bracing her weight with one hand on his chest and using the other to catch her panties and pull them aside. She took him inside with one quick, hard stroke, and fell into a fast, furious rhythm.

His hands went to her hips, trying to slow her down. She didn't want slow. “Easy, Jess. Slow down a little,” he whispered against her lips. He touched gently, spoke gently. He slid his hands up her back, over her neck, before he cupped her face and pressed a soft kiss to her lips.

Soft and sweet—here, lost in a dream that should be
hers,
and he was trying to be in control. Acting like he wanted to make love to her. Such a damn joke. “You want slow, go find some stupid bimbo and pretend to make love to her,” she said. “This is just sex—no reason to take it slow and easy.”

Part of her realized now that she wasn't dreaming. But she didn't want to acknowledge that. Just as she didn't want to acknowledge the pain simmering deep inside. Acknowledging it would be throwing a match inside a gas tank. It would explode inside her and consume her.

He tensed below her, his lashes dropping low over his eyes, shielding them. Then he moved, slipping his arms around her and locking her tight against him. He rolled, putting her body under his and catching her wrists, pinning them down by her head. His hands were gentle but unrelenting, and she couldn't break free. His weight crushed her into the mattress, and she could feel him pulsating inside her. She rocked her hips upward, and he swore.

“Damn it, Jess…Slow down. I didn't plan on this….”

Hell, no. He hadn't planned on this. Sleep a few minutes, and then he'd wake up and get out of bed before she awoke. Instead he woke up with his dick in her mouth while she stared up at him with fury in her eyes. The fury he could have handled. He'd earned it. But the pain there was eating at him, and he couldn't bear it. He lowered his head and kissed her. She turned away, and instead of trying to follow her mouth with his, he kissed her neck.

At the same time, he started to rock gently against her. She kept up that mad little shimmy with her hips, trying to take him deeper, harder, and faster, but he wasn't going to do it. He'd done a damn good job of convincing her that he'd just fucked her because she was handy, and now he had to undo that damage. Words alone weren't going to do it. Even thought he wanted to give in and take her with hard, quick greed, he wasn't going to.

Propping himself up on his elbows, he released her wrists and cupped her face once more. “I love how you taste,” he whispered against her lips. She kept her mouth shut, but he wasn't going to let that stop him. He traced the seam of her lips with his tongue. Her mouth softened just a little, for just a second, and then she jerked her head away again. “And the smell of you,” he murmured, burying his face in the crook of her neck. He rolled his hips against hers. She clenched around him, and he heard that quick, unsteady gasp leave her lips. “And I love how you feel.” He traced a hand down her side, pausing at the covered curve of her breast. The silky material of her chemise was little obstacle, but it was in the way. He wished she were naked, completely naked in his arms, but he didn't want to risk pulling away long enough to fix that. “Soft, strong…”

Vax shifted his weight until he could slip a hand between them. He circled his fingers over the tight knot of her clit. “Wet—tight.” So damned tight. He groaned as the muscles in her pussy flexed around him. Her hands came up, resting on his shoulders, hesitantly at first and then firmly. One hand slid over his shoulder, fisting in his hair. When he went to kiss her again, she sighed against his lips and opened her mouth, letting him inside.

He wrapped his arms around her and had to fight against pounding himself into her now that she'd relaxed a little. Instead he kept up that slow, almost lazy rhythm. As though he'd be content to do nothing but make love to her for the rest of the night and into the morning. Yeah, that would suit him to a T, but there was no way he could make this last much longer.