i 024767349a4cae9a (17 page)

age if it hadn't been for-" she gave a wry smile

ppointed her thumb towards the table on which bar every a number of bottles and glasses.

'But... but

bar se, forget it. At least we'll both forget it by to-bar row morning. As... as long as you'll be my friend,

bar bar dis.that wil be enough."

e had his hands on her shoulders now and his jbe was quiet, as he said, "Beatrice. Look at me."

pwen she looked at him, he said, "Would you bar bar Her eyes were screwed up tight: the tears were aming from her eyes and she was unable to speak pis arms went about her, and she fell against him. bar bar ft's all right, my dear, it's all right." As he stroked bar hair he felt a surge of feeling sweep through him. bar bar couldn't put a name to it. It wasn't passion. Was ove? It was something. Compassion, perhaps. Yes. s, compassion.

But even more than that. Pity?,.. ell, no, no.

She wasn't the kind of person you could (ly. She was too strong and... and she loved him. It bar as good to be loved. Oh yes, it was good to be Sved. He held her closer, and when she actually loaned, he lifted her face from his shoulder and put bar so lips on hers. And at this her arms went round his bar ck and she returned his embrace with such fervour lat he felt humbled at the feeling she was expressing, moment later they were standing apart and he was raping her eyes, as he said, "Well, if Mother's weakess has brought this about, let us drink to it, eh? e" have parsnip this time; it isnt so potent.

As he was about to move from her greater-than she said, You ght be sorry in the morning."

'ationo, no." He shook his head. "I'm not drunk. It takes a lot of that stuff to get me over the top. I've been seasoned to it from a boy.

I admit it damps down the worries of the day, but drunk? No. And tomorrow morning I'll just feel the same."

"Oh John. You'll never know what you've done for me."

"You'll likely have to pay for it, my dear.

I'm bad tempered, I'm taciturn, I'm unstable, at least in my times, coming and going: as my mother has always told me, I'm never to be found five minutes in the same place."

She now dabbed her face with her own handkerchief as she smiled and said, "I'll put up with all that, dear."

And she knew she would. No matter what his foibles were, she would welcome them, because he would be hers. Her husband. She would be a married woman, a wife. She suddenly thought of Helen and a wave of emotion, not untouched with fear, swept over her.

Yet, at the same time she knew an elation.

Helen was married to a man twice her age, and she knew now as she had known then, that her main object in marrying Leonard had been to get away from here, and from her. Yes, from her, because there had never been any love between them. But now she was marrying someone younger, good looking, attractive and a doctor.

As she watched John pouring out the parsnip wine she had a great longing for it to be morning, for his reactions next day would confirm that it was no drea and he wasn't regretting what had happened tonight On this thought she stiffened. She wouldn't let hi

get. He mustn't, he had given his word, he had. e closed her eyes for a moment and told herself to

calm. "To us." Her eyes sprang wide.

She took the glass

mi him and smiled as she repeated softly,

"To us," aile the words in her head were loud, ringing.

"To ,. To us. Oh yes, to us."

Looking back, Rosie remembered the shock she received when, in the New Year, she had retued home to be met by a radiant Beatrice. She recalled how first she had been surprised by the happy expression on her face, and of the gaiety in her voice as she had welcomed her back. Then later, in the study, Beatrice had poured out her news.

At first she had made no response to it, and the old Beatrice showed itself when she cried, "Why are you looking like that? Why shouldn't I be engaged?"' and she had spluttered, "Nn-no reason at all, only it's... a shock, a surprise. hat

John... the doctor, should love me?"' The doctor love her? Rosie recalled she had almost said the words out loud, except that she would have changed the word, "her" to "y"'. She had again stammered, as she said, "We-well, it-it's so unexpected. I mean, I never knew you loved him."

here's lots of things about me you don't know."

'allyes. Yes, Beatrice, you're right there." She had nodded at her, then added, "But I am gad for you." The rest of the conversation had been stilted and B had gone upstairs ad changed her clothes.

And ben Beatrice saw her in her old coat and hat, which leant she was going next door, she had looked at her ad said flatly, "What has happened makes no differwe to my opinion of our eighbours and your conant visits there," to which she had answered briefly, t makes no difference to me, either, Beatrice.?...

Both Robbie and Annie had welcomed her back so armly that she felt she was really home. But when Idrs Annie said to her, 'ationow give me your news of elen," she had replied Til deal with my visit and lelen later; first, I'll give you the doorstep news." bar nd when she had told them, they both stared in disggelief and said, he doctor and Beatrice?"' with Robbie further remarking, He's such a sensible fellow. When did this happen?"'

I 'Prom our brief snatches of conversation, I under bar stand it was on the evening of Christmas Day.

I 'He must have been drunk" Annie had bobbed her bar head. "That's it. And let me tell you, lass, you can bar get drunk, more drunk on home-made wine than the bar real stuff. I should know." And she had bobbed her head again as if there were a story behind her words. "Well, there's one thing for sure," Rosie said;

"she'll be no longer on her own and needing me; and so I shall get myself work of some kind."

"Work?"' Robbie had turned on her. "Work?

What kind of work can you do? You'd have to go to one of these secretarial colleges or something like that to learn."

"I wouldn't go to a secretarial college, I would go on a farm. I've had enough experience here, haven't I?"' She looked from one to the other. "I have dealt

with horses, cows, pigs and all the lesser breeds haven't I? for years now. So, don't you think I'm qualified to get a job on a farm?"'

Robbie and his mother had looked at each other, and Robbie then said, "Aye, yes; you've had plenty of experience, with a couple of horses, a couple of cows and a couple of pigs."

And at this she had put in, "And don't forget your main trade, cabbage, onions, carrots, leeks, the lot on the ground, besides the staff clinging to the wall."

The response to this had been that both Robbie and his mother laughed loudly. And after a moment Ro tilde sie's voice joined theirs; and then she said,

"Well, you see what I mean?"'

"Yes. Yes, lass, I see what you mean." Annie sat down at the other side of the table and she said, "I'm not making ths up." She glanced over at her son now, asking, Am I?"'

'If you're going to say what I think you're going to say, no, you're not making it up, Mam."

Again Annie had looked at Rosie, then said,

"Only yesterday, he there" comshe nodded towards her son- was making enquiries in the market to see if there was any young fellow he could take on as a helper, an apprentice, sort of, you know. That's right, isn't it?"' She had again looked at Robbie, and he nodded at Rosie, saying,

'allyes, that's quite right. We're not making it up; in fact, I've got two young fellows coming to see me today. If you stay long enough you'll meet them. But what Mam's trying to say is, there could be three applicants. D'you get me?"'

Rosie, so to speak, got him, and her face brightened and she said, Really?"'

jfc, really. You see, as I've only the two horses hey're inside most of the winter, that field down j half of it at least, is wasted. So, the idea was "low more. The town's spreading: they'll take as jh as I can give them and pay my price.

The land s being built on now used to be alotments.

Well, d'you say?"'

jpi I'd love that' said Rosie. "Oh, yes." And she ,ment her hands across the table towards the older an and, gripping them, she said "It would be a Jfef to be out of the house all day and just have to jback there at night And she surely won't put up h resistance to it now. Anyway" comshe shrugged shoulders- "she's different. It shows in her face.

"ow she's twenty-four, and an oldish twenty-four; j bar today she seems younger than me." And now ling at Robbie, she said, "And will I be paid? Well, course I'll be paid, but how much?"'

bar sHuh! It's started' comhe nodded at his mother-JB-EVERY money business. That's what one of them said to e in the market, "How much?" Well, miss-"

his disfes on her again, his face took on a dark stem look

Esd, 'x all depends on your capabilities Miss If you come up to expectations you'll get ten gs a week to start withand your grub. And I'd e to bet that's twice as much as your siter pays er cook."

Rosie did not come back at him with any jocular

but looking down towards the table, she said now, I've never had any money of my own;

- ling used to be bought for me. I was sometimes ipven a shilling, but that was for a birthday, to spend bar bar

"n weets. However, since Father died, there has been

nothing. She... Beatrice, reluctantly paid for my train fare to Helen's and I had nothing with which to buy Christmas presents. I felt awful. But Helen was kind. Helen is kind, always was.

I... I would have loved to stay down there, and I could have, only they are going to Switzerland: Leonard is not well, he's had to come out the Army, and he has to spend sottie months there. And you know what?"' As she now looked from one to the other her eyes were moist as she said Helen gave me five pounds before I left and they had given me so many presents at Christmas."

"Don't cry, lass. Don't cry.

Anyway, yo" have Helen. And although we are poor substitutes, you've got us."

Rosie's lids blinked rapidly and she said,

'Oh, yes, I've got you both. And you know something? I wouldn't be here without you; I would have run away, done something quite stupid. You know I used to be airy-fairy, mad-hatter, more like a boy than a girl, but a dreaming one, I was always dreaming But no more, no more."

When her head drooped again Annie said briskly, "Well, if you're going to start work, miss, there's no time like the present, and we're not going to pay you for sitting there guzzling tea and eating me best scones. They were for the tea, anyway Now, come on, get yourself up and let's get outsid."

That had happened on the day she had come back. But now this was another day: Beatrice's wedding day, and John's wedding day.

John stood facing Doctor Comwallis. They were each dressed in a dark suit with a caration in the 12ar onhole. It was Doctor Comwallis.who spoke, say-

*We! day of execution," and he took two steps

pr John and, putting his hand on his shoulder, bar aid 'How d'you feel?"'

I don't mean physically, I mean mentally; how lbu feel about all this? It was a surprise to me, you

bar bar will, that you were going to take her on, because always found her a bit of a madam." Everyone has two sides, sir." plAnd you've seen the good side?"' bar bar 0h yes. Yes, I've seen the good side." bar bar And you're quite happy about all this?"' bar bar Yes, of course." A stiff note had entered John's pee ow.

bar bar Well, that's something to know. And you know, IB'RE doing yourself well. I know the place is up to p eck in debt, but nevertheless, it's a very fine bar mse; it'll be worth your paying off that debt, boy. s (he best house around here for miles except perps for The Hall, and that place is about as warm as bar beer cellar. But one thing I would ask you: why d't you have a church wedding?"' bar She didn't want a church wedding, sir; she wanted bar one quietly." He did not add

"And quickly." She d seemed so anxious to get it over and done with. d he had wondered if it was because she sensed doubt in him. However, he had pushed this ought aside; she was a nice girl, a good girl, and was very, very fond of her. And he had to many Mnetime, for he wanted a family. Yes, he wanted a tanily. And that house was made for a family. He 8u see it swarming with children. Yes, he wanted a family, and she wanted children. Oh, yes, she had stated that quite openly: she would love children and she didn't care how many.

"Well, time's pressing, so let's away."

Doctor Comwallis thrust out his hand, saying, "I wish you all the best in the world, John. We have known each other long enough for me to be able to say two things I like about you: you're straight and you're a damn good doctor. And" comhe poked his head forward- "an uncomplaining one when Betsy Ann" comhe pointed to his leg- "decides she wants a rest; and so, thanks for that."

"Well, sir, I've... I've

been very happy here and hope to go on being so and working with you for a long time with Betsy Ann." They both laughed as the oder man pushed him in the shoulder, saying, "Go on. Get yourself away to a lifetime of worry, frustration and regret."

As John led the way, he repeated the words to himself, A lifetime of worry, frustration and regret." Oh, no! he hoped not. It would be a happy house, and what was more, his mother was settled for good and delighted about the arrangements, for she had taken to Beatrice and Beatrice to her. Yes, that was one of the main advantages, they had taken to each other...

As Rosie looked at and listened to the man behind the desk uttering the words that were marrying her sister to John alconer, the lovely doctor, as se tought of him she could not take it in that this was a marriage: everywhere was so bare, so stingy looking and all without God. It was a queer thing to think, bar but it jumped into her mind: there was nothing re j disJ

,Jas or holy happening that was tying these two i bar "le together for life. It seemed to be over in a few 'Btes, and then she was kissing Beatrice and then it. And John put his arms about her and again she ght He's such a lovely man. She did not at that jinent add, 'What does he see in our Beatrice?"' but thought was wavering somewhere in the back of ind...

he dining table was beautiflly set, but there were "jy ten people seated around it. Yet, the talk was ,d and merry, dictated mostly by Doctor ComwalThen, at three o'clock the coach was at the door L they were waved off to spend their honeymoon Still Leonards, which was a part of Hastings, so well wn to John, and which had been suggested by his her. Apparently Beatrice had no preference for Are they spent their honeymoon: as she had laugh'y said to his mother,