I Hear...Love (A Different Road #2) (9 page)

River stands dead center on the top step with his arms crossed over his chest as I reach him. He sighs a deep, disapproving sigh as I scoot past him. As I walk to the pool house, I see Cooper and Sadie walking on the beach back toward their house. He again raises his hand and gives me a little wave. I open my door, but pause because I’m extremely irritated with what River just did. Why is he being so rude to Cooper? I turn around to speak my mind, but like the ninja he is, he’s already gone back inside his house and the doors are closed. It’s probably all well and good. I think I would have chickened out anyway.

I grab a bottle of water out of the refrigerator as my cell phone rings. I look at the display and see it’s Maddy.

“Hello,” I answer.

“Hey, how’s it going?” she asks.

“Alright,” I lie.

“Uh oh. That doesn’t sound good,” she says.

“What? I said alright?”

“Yeah, but that alright on my end sounded like a lying pile of garbage,” she fires back. “What’s wrong?” she asks.

I sigh, then say, “Nothing.”

“Spill it,” she says more firmly.

“I’ve just got a lot on my mind,” I tell her.

“Alright, I’m going to say this once. I don’t have many friends, and I’m a ‘take me as I am, or leave me’ kind of girl. Which most just leave me . . . but I digress. I’m weird, socially awkward, extremely guarded, quiet, and I mostly keep to myself. I like you. I like you a lot. I’m not quite sure why, but I can feel it in my heart that we’re meant to be friends. So, I think you’re stuck with me,” she says.

“I don’t either,” I reply.

“You don’t either, what?” she answers, confused.

“Have many friends,” I tell her honestly.

“Oh,” she replies, then there’s a long silence. “So, is there anything I can help you with? I may be weird and awkward, but I’m a really good listener,” she finishes.

“It’s my brother,” I tell her. “And Cooper,” I add, truthfully.

“Your brother intimidates the crap out of me. We’ll come back to River, skip him for a second. Did you see Cooper again after lunch?” she asks, excitedly.

“I did. He found me down at the beach tonight. I don’t know what it is about him. When he asks me a question, I just can’t control myself, it all just comes flying out of my mouth. I can’t stop myself,” I tell her.

“But, that’s a good thing,” she replies.

“Is it?” I ask. “Every time I open my mouth, I feel like I’m giving him more and more reasons to run away into the hills as far away from me as he can get.”

“Somehow, I just don’t think that’s true,” she says.

I head into my bedroom, put the phone on speaker, and change out of my work clothes. I pull the covers back, get in, flip the television on for the flicker of light, grab the phone, then take it off speaker.

“So, what’s going on with you?” I ask, trying to change the subject from me.

“I had such a great day. I can’t tell you how much working for Joss and Nina has changed my life. Every day I wake up, I have to tell myself that, yes, this is my life now. I took some killer food photos today. It’s kind of embarrassing my obsession with food porn. Hey, wait a minute. We were talking about you,” she says.

“I’d rather hear about you,” I tell her.

“Oh, I need your help with something,” she says.

“You do?” I question.

“Yeah. I’m taking this photography class, and I need to take photos of a person with some landscape. I immediately thought of you. Can I come over this weekend and take some photos of you on the beach? I need to do both color and black and white.”

“And you want me in the photos?” I ask, surprised.

“Uh, yes. You’re drop dead gorgeous,” she says. “I’ll print them out for you too,” she continues. “Please?” she whines.

“Do I need to do anything special? Or wear anything special?” I ask.

“Nope, just come as you are. Pretty please?”

“OK.”

“OK? Really? You’ll do it?” she asks, excitedly.

“Sure, it’s not like my social calendar is bursting at the seams or anything,” I tell her, laughing.

“So, what about River?” she asks.

“He’s being a royal jerk lately, but he’s not going to care that you’re taking pictures of me,” I tell her.

“No, not about the photos. What specifically is bothering you about River?” she asks, not letting me out of talking about him.

“He’s just so overprotective all the time. I feel like he’s smothering me,” I tell her.

“I hear you, but can I say one thing,” she says, cautiously.

“Sure,” I reply.

“I’ve gone my whole life where not one person has cared what I’m doing, where I am, or how I’m feeling. You may feel like he’s being overprotective and smothering, but I’m betting it’s because he loves you.”

“Maddy,” I say, quietly.

She wants to do a lot of talking about me, and I’ve told her bits and pieces here and there about my childhood, but I’ve never heard one thing about her. River is a tough nut to crack, but Maddy’s locked up tighter than Fort Knox.

“I have to go . . . my . . . uh . . . dryer is buzzing. I’ll text you tomorrow with more details about the shoot,” she says and sniffles.

“Maddy,” I quickly call, trying to get her not to hang up.

“I’ll talk to you later,” she says and disconnects.

I look at my cell phone and wonder if I should call her back. She’s been a really good friend and somehow I feel like I’ve just failed her.

My cell vibrates indicating I have a text. I look at the display and it’s from Maddy. It says,
Have a good night.
I smile, then text her back the same. If I know anything, it’s not to push someone when they’re not ready to talk. Maddy will talk to me when she’s ready.

I place my cell on the nightstand, grab my headphones and place them on my ears. I sink back in bed, concentrate on the music, and will myself to fall asleep. After two hours of tossing and turning, I get out of bed and head out to the deck for some fresh air.

The waves are relatively calm tonight. The birds are asleep and there’s no one on the beach.

I wish I enjoyed the silence.

The slightest sound of the breeze distorts and brings me back to sitting in that car. Every whisper carried through the air, twists and turns into something that I know in my heart it’s not. I grab onto the railing, lean back on my heels, then put my head down. Why can’t these visions and sounds end? Why can’t I stop it? It was torture to live them at all. What have I done to deserve to live with them day after day, too?

As I look back up and open my eyes, a figure standing in the distance down the darkened beach catches my eye. My heart plummets to my feet as fear takes over. I close my eyes and will it to go away. I open my eyes again and the figure is still there, but now sitting next to their side, I see another figure. I look harder and recognize that it’s Sadie. My mind instantly clears all of my fearful thoughts. Cooper reaches down, unleashes Sadie, and lets her go. He raises his arm over his head and gives me a wave.

Sadie runs down the beach to the house, climbs the steps, stops by my side, and looks up at me blinking her gorgeous eyes at me. I look back down the beach and wave back at Cooper. He turns around, then disappears into the darkness.

“Come on girl, it’s time for bed,” I tell her, walking back into the pool house.

I lock the door and her nails quietly clickity-click on the hardwood floor as we walk to my bedroom.

I climb into bed, put my headphones over my ears, then Sadie jumps on my bed and snuggles next to me with her wet nose tucked under my chin. All my thoughts clear, I take a deep, cleansing breath and I immediately fall asleep.

I climb into bed, lay down, then pat the bed next to me for Sadie to join me, fully prepared to fight with her for my space on my side of the bed. But she doesn’t jump in bed with me like she always does. Instead, she sits on the floor and looks at me.

“What are you doing?” I ask, like she’s going to answer me.

She lifts her paw, places it on the mattress, and whines at me.

“Have it your way,” I tell her, roll over, and close my eyes.

It seems like I had just fallen asleep when Sadie barks, waking me up. I roll over and look at her.

“What’s your deal? Do you need to go outside?” I ask her. “You didn’t eat something you weren’t supposed to, did you?”

She removes her paw, backs away from the bed, then starts to head out of the bedroom. She stops in the doorway and turns around to make sure I’m getting up, then continues down the hallway. I rip the sheet off me, pull on a t-shirt and a pair of shorts, then grab her leash. Before I open the door, I leash her. She will not be running away from me in the middle of the night. She can do her business, then it’s straight back to bed. I’ll sleep on the couch if she stinks me out of my own room.

We get to the bottom step and she immediately turns right with determination. She walks one house over, then sits down and doesn’t move.

“What are you doing? Come on. Hurry up and get to it. I’m tired and have to work in the morning,” I tell her.

She doesn’t get up, but looks down the beach, then up at something. I look where she’s looking and I see Kate standing at the railing of her house. The moonlight casts a beautiful, stunning glow over her profile and I find that I can’t look away from her. It’s an eerie beauty and I sense her millions of pieces scattered all around her.

Sadie stands up and whines, then pulls on the leash. Kate looks down the beach and sees us standing there, staring at her. I raise my hand and give her a wave, then Sadie whines again.

“Does Kate need you tonight, girl?” I ask her.

Sadie turns her head and looks at me, and I swear she just nodded at me.

I reach down and unleash her, and she immediately runs toward Kate. Once Sadie is next to Kate, she reaches her hand up and gives me a wave. I smile, then turn around and head back to the house. I hope Kate’s alright and that Sadie can bring her the comfort that she needs.

I walk back home and flop back in bed, too tired to remove my clothes or cover up with a sheet, and I’m fast asleep.

The next morning, I wake up refreshed, having slept an extra fifteen minutes because I didn’t need to take Sadie for a morning walk, and I jump in the shower. As I let the water wash over my head, I think about Kate. Everything about her intrigues me. She’s beautiful, yet behind that beauty is an ugly past I know she can’t let go of. She walks with what appears to be determination, but underneath I see a false sense of confidence. Her smile, though rare, is both stunning and captivating, but feels forced for the good of others. Her eyes are young and bright, but seem to hold ten lifetimes of sorrow and worry. Her thoughts, though obviously I can’t read, seem to permeate my own when her hand is in mine. She radiates with several conflicting emotions all at the same time. I see her internal fight through her eyes. She tries so hard to put on this mask that tells everyone she’s fine, when with just one look I know she’s not. I see how much she’s trying to prove herself to everyone, and most of all to River. She wears a beautiful mask, but underneath that is an even more beautiful woman.

I turn off the shower, put on a pair of boxers, then brush my teeth. I wipe my hand over the foggy mirror and look back at the man staring at me. I see years of a happy childhood and decades of a life lived with family, love, and happiness. The only thought running through my mind is to call my parents and tell them I love them and thank you. Thank you for loving me and raising me in a nurturing household, for giving me the childhood I had and making me the man I am today. My family isn’t perfect by a longshot. We had our ups and downs, and my sister and I had our fair share of fights. But, we had and still do have a fantastic life.

I put on a pair of black dress pants, then I pick out a dress shirt and tie, and toss them on the bed. I head into the kitchen to make some much needed coffee. I watch the coffee drip into the pot until there’s enough to fill a cup. I pull out the pot and pour it into my mug, then place it back so it can continue to fill. I bring my cup to my lips as someone knocks on the back door.

I turn my head and see Kate and Sadie standing on the other side of the sliding glass door. The sight of the two of them instantly brings a smile to my face. I walk to the door, unlock it, and open it for them. Sadie walks right by me without even a sniff, then walks to her food dish but finds it empty. She sinks to the floor with a disgruntled moan, then rolls on her back and wiggles around. Kate is dressed for work in a designer business pant suit and has her mask firmly set on her face.

“It’s nice to see you too, Sadie,” I tell her. “Good morning,” I say to Kate.

“Good morning,” she says, with her eyes glued to my bare chest. “Thank you for letting Sadie sleep over last night,” she says.

“You’re welcome, but I don’t think there was any
letting
involved. Sadie wouldn’t let me sleep. I think she needed you, but that being said, she’s yours anytime she needs you again,” I tell her, knowing full well it’s Kate who needs Sadie. “Help yourself to some coffee, I’m just going to go put a shirt on,” I say, walking down the hall.