Imagine That (27 page)

I have become a stalker.

As she sat in her car outside Nate's house, Emily reflected on the latest sad twist in her life. Tools of surveillance lay scattered in the passenger seat. A half-eaten chicken salad sandwich, a notepad and pencil, and binoculars, though her quarry was only fifty feet away, so they were hardly necessary. In theory, the paper and pencil were so she could record people's comings and goings, but she'd brought them just in case the absurd notion of spying on Nate sparked an idea.

She also had an empty glass bottle.

Emily didn't like to think about why she'd brought the bottle. Relieving herself in such as fashion seemed physically impossible. Besides, she'd sooner knock on a neighbor's door and beg to use their facilities than attempt to pee into a jar.

Of course, if Nate would stop being stubborn and talk to her, stalking wouldn't be necessary.

Distracted by thoughts of how she was going to get Nate to forgive her, Emily completely missed the figure heading toward the car. Didn't even notice until Zach rapped on the windshield.

Emily yelped, hand flying to her chest. Cursing her own ineptness at spy games, she lowered the window. “Afternoon, Zach.”

“You've been out here for hours,” he said, leaning down to rest his arms on the door frame. “What are you doing?”

“Hanging out?” she said, trying to brazen her way through.

The blasted kid grinned. “You're casing our house. Waiting for Nate. What are you gonna do? Tackle him in the driveway?”

“Maybe.”

He chuckled.

“What?” she demanded. “You don't think I could take him? I'm a lot stronger than I look.”

“He's still pretty mad,” Zach said.

“No kidding, Sherlock.”

“He won't even let anyone talk about you. I said your name the other day, and he about took my head off.”

“Great, I'm an unmentionable,” Emily muttered.

“A what?”

“It means I have a long road ahead.” She studied Zach for a moment. “How are you doing?”

The boy's thin shoulders lifted.

“And Nate?”

Another shrug.

The Cooper brothers were hopeless. “Do you two even talk to each other?” she asked, amazement warring with frustration. “Your dinner table conversation must be scintillating.”

“We don't actually sit down to a real dinner. Mostly we stand at the kitchen sink. If he's even home.”

“Nate doesn't come home?” Emily asked in alarm. “Where does he go?”

“Dunno.”

Zach lifted his head, and Emily sucked in a breath at the naked anguish she saw in his gray eyes.

“It's like he doesn't want to be in the house,” Zach said. “And I think he's torn up over you, even if he won't admit it. Anna tries to talk to him, but he's been brushing her off, too.”

Misery surrounded the kid like a heavy fog, and Emily's heart broke for him. “Get in the car.”

He shifted, confusion replacing sorrow. “Why?”

“We're going for a drive.”

Emily bit her lip as Zach walked around the car. Nate would be furious if he knew she'd absconded with his brother, but for once she didn't care about Nate's feelings. Zach needed some serious TLC.

The teenager opened the door and took in the mess. He balled up the sandwich in the wrapper and threw it in the back, along with the notepad. Then he held up the binoculars. “See anything interesting?”

“Nope,” Emily said on a wry note. “You live in what is quite possibly the most boring neighborhood in America.”

The bottle made an appearance. Zach eyed the container and then slanted a glance in her direction. “You watch too much TV.”

“It's all research.”

The jar disappeared over his shoulder. “Where are we going?”

“You feel like ruining your dinner?”

He chuckled, which Emily interpreted as a
yes
.

Zach laughed again when she pulled up in front of
Jessie
'
s Treats
. “You think she'll let you in the door?”

She smacked him in the arm. “Ingrate.”

Far from banning them from the premises, Jessie treated them like visiting royalty. She sat them at the best table by the window and brought out a plate of her most special desserts, including mini chocolate cakes, fruit tarts, bite-sized cheesecakes, and scrumptious mousse cups. Zach wolfed down half the plate like a human vacuum cleaner. He hadn't been kidding about the state of eating in his house.

Emily watched him inhale another mini-cake in utter fascination. “Not to sound like a boring adult, but maybe you should leave room for something with at least some nutritional value.”

“I'll be hungry by then,” Zach said, licking chocolate icing off his fingers.

“Oh, to have a teenaged boy's metabolism.”

Having assuaged his voracious appetite for the moment, Zach sat back in his chair with a contented sigh.

Jessie stopped by the table and touched Zach's shoulder. “How are you holdin' up, kid?”

“I'm all right.”

“He tellin' the truth?” she asked, looking at Emily.

“I wouldn't know,” Emily said. “I'm not exactly on the best of terms with the Cooper brothers right now.”

“Right. Heard about the confrontation at the grave site with the long lost Dale.” Jessie darted a careful glance at Zach. “He's been in here a couple times.”

“My dad is still here?” Zach asked, sitting up straight.

“He's been making job inquiries in town,” Jessie said. “Seems like he's of a mind to stay awhile.”

“Anyone hired him yet?” Emily asked.

A grimace twisted Jessie's lips, and she shook her head. “Old resentments are hard to get over sometimes.”

“Don't I know it,” Emily muttered.

Jessie patted Zach on the head and ambled away. The boy clammed up then, so Emily herded him back to the car. He didn't speak again until after she'd started the engine.

“I want to see him.”

Emily was looking over her shoulder for oncoming traffic, so she didn't register his words. “See who?”

“My dad.”

Breaks squealed. “What?”

“You know where he is, right?”

The chocolate mousse Emily had just eaten settled like a stone in her gut. “Oh, Zach… no.”

He twisted in his seat. “Please.”

“This can't be happening to me again,” she muttered. “I can't take you out there.”

“Why not?”

“I can think of six-feet-two inches of why not. Your brother—”

“Doesn't get to make every decision for me,” Zach retorted

“Technically and legally, he does.”

“Then we won't tell him.”

“What is it with you Coopers?” she said, banging her head against the steering wheel. “Are you determined to ensure I never have a chance with Nate? It's like a conspiracy. First Dale wanting to see your mother, then Rachel with her dying request.”

“You had my dad show up at the funeral because it was what my mom wanted?” Zach said.

“Yes, she hoped I would be able to help heal the rift. In hindsight, I shouldn't have picked the funeral to start the proceedings. Way too much emotional upheaval already.”

“Please, Emily.”

She studied him. “Why do you want to see him?”

“I need to know what happened. Why he left.”

“For the sake of curiosity? Why aren't you angry at him?”

“I am,” Zach said. “I'm furious that he left us, but I don't even know who he is. Nate has memories.”

The explanation made sense in a weird way. “They have a history. You don't.”

“Yeah.”

“It's a bad idea,” Emily said, still trying to dissuade him.

Zach lowered his head, jutting out his bottom lip. “I thought you wanted to bring us together as a family. How can you make Mom's last request come true if I never meet him?”

“You are so like your father,” she said on a muttered oath, knowing she'd already lost the argument.

“I am?” he asked, looking intrigued by the prospect of sharing anything with a virtual stranger.

“You're a pretty good mixture of both your parents. Your mom's thoughtfulness and your dad's impossible demands.”

“He wanted to tell her the truth before she died. That's why he came back, right?”

“Yes.”

“And you agreed with him?”

“Yeah, I did.”

“Even though you knew Nate would hit the roof?”

“Yep.”

“Don't I deserve the truth, too?”

She jabbed a finger at him. “You're way too young to be so logical.”

Emily backed out of the spot and headed out of town.

Zach flashed a grin so similar to the one Rachel must have found so captivating in her husband. “I'm just mature for my age,” he said. “I've had to grow up fast, you know.”

Emily gasped in mock outrage. “You're already using your mother's memory to manipulate? She'd be shocked.”

“I hope she'd be proud.” His voice shook and he swiped away a tear.

“She would be delirious with pride,” Emily said, ruffling his hair. “She's probably showing God pictures right now and bragging about you guys until He tells her to put them away.”

“I wish Nate would forgive you. Everything would be more bearable if you were around.”

“I'm already driving you out to see your dad,” Emily said in a wry tone. “You don't have to butter me up.”

“It's true. Nate would be more bearable, at least.”

“I screwed up big time, Zach. I went behind your brother's back. I'm not sure I'd forgive him if the situation were reversed. And I'm about to do it again.”

Zach grew quiet again. Perhaps nervous. Perhaps thinking of something to say. What did one say to a father you'd never met before? The teenager recoiled a little when he saw the flea-trap motel said father now called his temporary home.

“He's staying here?” Zach asked, looking askance at the pockmarked parking lot, dirt-covered windows, and doors so dingy it was hard to say what color they'd once been.

“Exiles can't be choosy about their accommodations,” Emily said as she pulled to a stop next to her favorite black, unmarked car. The stupid surveillance vehicle had already gotten her into so much trouble.

Zach swallowed. “What should I do?”

“You can try knocking on the door.”

He continued to stare straight ahead.

“Or… we can sit here all day,” Emily said in her most reasonable voice. “He's bound to come out at some point. I've still got the bottle in the back.”

Zach shot her a dirty look and climbed out of the car.

Emily said a little prayer as he waited for Dale to open the door. “Lord, help them both. I think You're the only one who can heal this rift.”

Dale's eyes widened when he saw Zach. Then his expression shifted and filled with hope, like a man who'd gotten a reprieve from a death sentence. He held out his hand, and Zach took it. Tentatively, but it was enough to bring tears to Emily's eyes.

Dale switched his gaze toward Emily, and she wiggled her fingers. Dale said something to Zach, and then the two headed across the parking lot to the coffee shop.

“Well, that went well,” she prayed again. “Maybe You've got more power than I give You credit for.”

When the two emerged forty minutes later, they were walking shoulder-to-shoulder. Looking at them, no one would ever guess they'd just met. Zach slipped back into the car, while Dale approached Emily's side.

“Thank you,” he said.

A few years had been erased from the elder Cooper's face in the last few minutes. “It was his idea,” Emily said.

“You brought him, even though it won't make things easier between you and Nate,” Dale said. “I'm sorry about the other day. I should have known better than to show up at the funeral.”

“Me, too.”

His eyes gentled. “He'll forgive you.”

“I'm not so sure.”

****

Nate stepped out of his truck at the same time Emily's now familiar sports car turned into his driveway. For a second his pulse kicked into overdrive, and he started to smile.

Then he remembered.

Punching his father. He still couldn't believe he'd laid the old man out flat. Emily's face, as she'd admitted to sneaking the lying scum in to see his mother. Her shuttered expression. His own shattered heart. He swore there were jagged edges around the organ now. It still pumped, but he didn't feel alive. Every breath he took jabbed at his insides like a bed of nails.

The sensation returned as her car came to a stop. Their eyes met through the windshield. He couldn't be sure, but he thought she winced. He shifted to look at the passenger seat. Zach.

His brother emerged first. Emily wasn't far behind, and then the three of them stood in the driveway staring at each other.

“Where've you two been?” Nate asked.

“Nowhere,” Emily said.

“Town,” Zach said at the same time.

Nate leveled a penetrating gaze on them as he regarded one then the other. Suspicion started to rise. “You guys should have gotten your stories straight.”

Zach tried on his arrogant, teenager,
what-do-you-know
expression. “We went to Jessie's, okay? I'm allowed go into town, aren't I?”

Defensive on top of the guilt-ridden eyes.
What
had they been up to?

Nate crossed his arms, zeroed in on Emily, and waited.

“It was my idea…” they chorused together.

“What… did… you… do?”

Emily squared her shoulders. “Zach met his father.”

Nate's anger spiked again, consuming him. Just like it had the other day when Aurora's stupid dog cornered him on the ladder. Any softness he'd felt on seeing Emily disappeared.

“Zach, go in the house,” he said.

“I have a right to see my own father,” Zach cried. “It was my idea, okay. I wanted to go. I made her take me.”

“I'm sure. Get in the house.”

The kid refused to back down. “She's only trying to help.”

Nate leveled a dark gaze at his kid brother. “Zach… so help me…”

Something in his expression must have cowered Zach's show of bravery, because his eyes widened and he sidled past, disappearing inside the house.

Nate's blood pumped like a bass drum as he studied her. With Emily's backup gone, she seemed to deflate. Her shoulders hung so low it was a wonder her hands didn't brush the ground. Her foot twisted, and he'd be surprised if she didn't end up biting a chunk off her lip. A few days ago, Nate would have held out his arms and tried to comfort her. Now, all he could see was a hazy layer of red.

“You don't know when to quit, do you?” he asked, surprised his voice came out calm when every cell in his body threatened to explode in a fit of rage.

“Zach needed to—”

“Zach is my responsibility, and I don't want him anywhere near Dale Cooper. Do you understand?”

“Nate, if you could have seen them—”

“Emily!”

She blinked at the harshness of his tone, and her mouth went slack. Nate hated himself for the glimpse of fear he saw in her eyes, but he couldn't stop.

“You're not hearing me,” he said. “Or maybe you don't get it. So, let me put it in words you'll understand. If you ever interfere with my family again, I'll make one of your eight-legged creatures look like a lap dog. From now on, you stay away from my brother, and you stay away from me.”

“I had a good reason for my
interference
, as you call it.”

“I don't care about your reasons.”

“But Nate—”

“Stop, Emily. Just stop. Stop everything. Stop butting in. Stop trying to explain. Stop thinking there's a way past what you did. It's over.”

“You can't mean that.”

“It never should have started. I knew from the start you were a disaster waiting to happen.

Emily stumbled back as if he'd shot her. “Nate…”

“You need to leave. I'm about a minute away from turning into something you don't want to see. Now go!”

He couldn't look her in the eyes. Couldn't watch Emily leave. Or call her back.

Once inside, Nate shut the door and sank back against the hard surface, exhaustion draining every drop of energy from his body. He hated who he'd become. Hated the helpless anger. Hated the hurtful, venom-filled words coming out of his mouth. Nate didn't even recognize himself anymore and knew he had to do something before he lost control completely.

His eyes opened, and he strode over to the phone.

“Seth… I need to talk to someone.”