In Deep Kimchi (22 page)

“It’s nothing compared to what you go through. The only time my fans are interested in me is at book signings.”

He helped her back into the limo and sat down next to her. “I’ve read some of your books,” he replied as Kenshin pulled away from the curb and headed back to the hotel. “You are a very good writer.”

“Really? You’ve actually read my books? Which one is your favorite?”

“The one about the older woman and the younger man.
If I Could Turn Back Time
.”

Shaundra gasped. “You have read my book. I am flabbergasted and honored. What did you like about it?”

“The ending,” he replied, smiling at her.

Was he teasing her? “That’s odd. Why?”

“The couple found a way to be happy after all the obstacles put before them. I like those kinds of endings.”

“I do too, but real life is never that simple. I can manipulate my stories to make them end any way I want them to, but I can’t get a happy ending in my own relationship.”

“Why not?”

“Because I’ve never found the right man.”

“I can’t believe that. What about your husband?”

“Nice, but not without his share of issues. I loved him until the day he died, but our marriage still lacked the spontaneity of my novels.”

“But I bet the sex was great?” He clasped his hand over his mouth in embarrassment.

Shaundra chuckled. “Please stop blushing. You’re going to have to get comfortable with what I write about if we’re to be friends, and yes, it was pretty great most of the time.”

Ichiro removed his hand. “Are you in a relationship now?”

“Fine time to ask, but yes. I’ve been with him for years.”

“He does not make you happy.”

“No, he’s nice enough, but I don’t love him.”

“Then why are you with him, if you don’t mind me asking?”

Shaundra sighed. Why did twenty-five-year-olds see things so clearly? “Because I haven’t found a way to end it. I can’t find the words to say ‘you’re a nice man, but I just want to be friends.’”

“Men don’t like that sentence,” Ichiro teased. “See, you just said it.”

Shaundra smiled. “Yes, to you, but not to him.”

“What would happen if you did tell him? Would he hit you?”

“No, he’d probably ask why and then I’d have to make up a lie to spare his feelings.”

Ichiro shook his head. “You don’t strike me as the lying type.”

“I’m not, but I can’t tell him the truth without hurting him.”

“You’re not attracted to him anymore?”

Shaundra shook her head. “No, when I look at him, I see friend, not lover.”

Ichiro leaned closer. “What does a lover look like?”

Those blue eyes hypnotized her. “Kind of like you, young, virile and with a nice body.”

“And he has none of these qualities?”

He was so close his cologne made her dizzy. She wanted to kiss him again. “No, he’s fifty-one years old and everything has gone south, if you know what I mean.” Shaundra blushed. “Maybe I should not be telling you these things, but I’ve never had anyone that I can truly talk to. I feel comfortable talking to you.”

He raised his hand and brushed her bangs away from her eyes. “So he is no longer sexually appealing to you?”

Shaundra trembled from his touch. “That’s exactly it and I feel so horrible for thinking this way since he’s just a year older than I am. When I look into a mirror, I don’t see a fifty-year-old woman staring back and maybe it’s the same way with him when he looks into a mirror. But when we’re together, I see that his body looks different than it did ten years ago. He doesn’t have that muscular build or nice abs that used to turn me on.”

“Oh, I see,” Ichiro said. A light blush flushed his cheeks.

She leaned against his shoulder and rested his head on it. “No, you don’t. You’re twenty-five and gorgeous, and I feel bad because I’m fifty and I find you attractive. I don’t think things are supposed to work this way. I just know I would feel horrible if someone told me that they didn’t want me anymore because I was old and saggy.”

Ichiro raised her head, lowered his lips to hers and gently kissed her. “I don’t think that would happen. You’re fifty now and I don’t find you saggy.”

The heat rushed up through her body again. “You haven’t seen me naked.”

“Are you saggy?”

“No.” She felt like stripping and proving it to him.

“Then don’t worry about something that may never happen for another twenty years or so. Something like that isn’t important to me.”

Shaundra snuggled up to him. “How did you get so smart?”

“By not talking and just listening.”

She listened to the steady beat of his heart against his chest. “I think you are good for my ego, Ichiro.” They arrived back at the hotel sooner than she expected. Shaundra moved away from him and sat straight in the seat.

Ichiro reached over and touched her hand. “Before we go in, I need to ask you something.”

“Sure, anything,” Shaundra said staring down at his hand.

“Are you sexually attracted to Yori?”

Shaundra sighed.
Damn
. “Yes.”

“I see.” He paused. “Are you sexually attracted to me?”

Shaundra raised her head and looked deeply into his eyes
. Lie, lie and end this now before you hurt him.
“Yes,” she answered honestly. “Now you see my dilemma. How do you choose between two angels when you’re old enough to be both their mothers?”

Kenshin opened the car door and helped both of them out.

Ichiro took her hand. “I will not ask you to make such a decision. Having you as a friend is more than I can ask.”

“That is nice of you to say, but I’m old enough to read your eyes even if you don’t say the words, Ichiro. I don’t want to hurt either of you so I don’t think I can make that kind of decision. You do understand that I will be returning to the United States when all of this is over?”

“That is why I will not pressure you into choosing me or Yori. Just promise me that you will end your old relationship and find someone who will make you happy.”

They walked up the stairs. “I promise.”

“But in the meantime, please be my date for the duration of your stay.”

Date? He wants to date me?
Reality crept back in at that very moment. “Are you just asking this because you know Yori’s fiancée is here and you don’t want me to do anything that would put Aomori in an embarrassing situation?”

Ichiro’s hand tightened on hers and then he removed it and opened the door for her. “He told you?”

“Yes.”

“Surprising. I was sure he would try to lie and cover it up.”

“No, he told me everything.”

“And you still like him?”

Shaundra shrugged her shoulders. “I don’t know what I feel when it comes to him. It is completely different than what I feel for you. There, I’ve said it. I would never come between Yori and his fiancée, nor you and Yori.” They entered the lobby.

“I don’t understand women, but I’m willing to be your knight in shining armor for the time you are here. You shouldn’t have to be alone while he waits to come to his senses.”

“Then I accept. But it has nothing to do with whether he makes a decision or not.”
Not exactly a lie, or the truth either.

They walked toward the elevator, ignoring the stares as they held hands. The elevator arrived and they stepped in. Ichiro pulled her to him and planted a deep and sensual kiss upon her lips. Shaundra melted in his arms. He released her. “What was that for?”

“Just to let you know that I also find you sexually attractive and don’t care about sags. The Shaundra Morrison I admire is the fifty-year-old author in this elevator with me, and I would be honored to act as your friend, date or lover as long as you allow me to do so.”

The elevator opened on their floor and Yori stood on the other side.

“You’re late,” he told Ichiro. “Where have you been?”

“On a date,” Ichiro replied.

“Masaaki was worried about you. You know how he is when it comes to rehearsals.”

Ichiro stepped off the elevator, still holding her hand. “Practice does not start for another hour.”

The three walked toward her door. Ichiro bowed to her and left her with Yori.

“What do you think you’re doing?” Yori asked her once Ichiro was out of ear range.

“I’m not doing anything.”

“Looks like you’re doing something to me. You had breakfast with him and went out on a date with him.”

“We spent a lovely morning at the Meiji Shrine. You can verify this with the bodyguards and Kenshin if you must. He thought I might like to see some of Tokyo since I’ll only be here a couple more weeks. Is that a problem?”

“Not if you’re just leading him on.”

Shaundra leaned against the door. “I don’t understand what you want me to do. First, you seem interested and then you aren’t. You tell me that Ichiro likes me and then you get upset when he takes me on an outing. And let’s not mention that little finger exercise you performed on me yesterday. Now as much as I enjoyed it, you went and ruined it by telling me that your fiancée was on her way to town. In my book, it means you’re interested in a little fling with the older woman, but not at the expense of your girlfriend finding out.”

“That is not true. I did not know she was coming and did not mean to offend you.” He leaned against the wall. “Lately, I don’t know what is wrong with me. I thought I was happy and knew what my future held for me. But now I’m not sure. Amaya and I have been engaged since we were kids.”

“Then why mess it up? You had every intention on marrying her before I arrived. Don’t give up a lifetime commitment and a future with a woman you love because you’re tempted by another woman. Don’t you love her?”

“I don’t know,” Yori confessed. “Things are so confused.”

“Let me make this easy for you. Don’t hurt her by thinking you can have your cake and eat it too.”

“What does that mean?”

“It means you can’t have a relationship with both of us. Anyway, she is a better choice. I’m so much older than you and I’ll be returning to the United States when this is over.” She put the key card in the door and opened it.

“I don’t care about your age,” he said, suddenly filling the doorway.

Before she knew it, the door closed and locked with both of them on the inside of the room. “What are you doing?”

“I don’t know.” He pulled her into his arms and kissed her senseless.

* * * *

“You’re late,” Masaaki said as Yori entered the Dome rehearsal room.

“I’m just five minutes late.”

“Where were you?” Satoshi asked. “We sent you to get Ichiro and he beat you here.”

“Talking. It doesn’t matter. I’m here now.”

“You need to change,” Masaaki informed him. “No sense in getting that suit sweaty.”