In Love by Christmas: A Paranormal Romance (39 page)

54

Married for Ever

W
ill stood in
the back of the room, watching. Grandfather with his feathers and sage, his pipe and his glory filled the room and everyone in it. The three of them stood in front of the Christmas tree, the shaman chanting and reading Scriptures. Such a strange juxtaposition, but so brilliant and true.

He had his daughter back. His little girl, ruined so young, was whole again. She was marrying a wonderful man. Will could feel Leroy’s soul when he held Ashley. He was healing her. He would heal her whenever she needed it. He would protect her from anything. She’d be safe from Donatore with Leroy.

At the end of the ceremony, after “I pronounce you man and wife,” Leroy pulled away from Ashley and faced her.

“I will always love you,

“My moon and my stars.

“You’re the breath that sustains me,

“The truth in my arms.

“I will never leave you.

Will didn’t realize he was singing for a moment. Leroy had a huge, deep voice that rumbled in his chest. His words sounded like talking, but they weren’t. Leroy was singing to his wife.

“I’m yours for this lifetime,

“I’m yours long past that.

“I’ll keep you in love,

“I will keep you from strife.

“I will always love you,

“My beautiful wife.

“I love you, Ashley. I’ve loved you since I was born.” He bent over and kissed her. Golden sparkles spiraled around them. There was a
crack
! like an electric discharge.

Will couldn’t stand it. Leroy’s voice fractured his soul. Everything he’d held back was loosened. His throat worked like he was choking to death. His ribs heaved in and out. He could not stay there. People could not see him like that. He glanced toward the Christmas tree. Leroy and Ashley glowed like beacons before it. She was back, and she didn’t love him.

He bolted, running from the living room through the kitchen. The air was full of steam and smells of delicious food. Serving dishes piled with delicacies covered the counters. A bunch of those little village people stood around.

Vanessa had a gazebo out in back. Will made for it and locked the door. Barely aware of what he was doing, he turned to the rear of the gazebo and threw himself face down on the floor. His head was pointed toward a wilting geranium. He stretched his hands toward it.

“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.” The sound of Ashley’s cry pierced everything. If she had made that noise earlier, would it have made a difference? Would he have stopped doing what he did to save his daughter’s pain? And his wife’s?

Would they have been a good family, Kathryn and he still married, and Ashley never needing to go through what she did? Would hearing her cry earlier have saved them?

He wouldn’t have heard it. He was lost in himself. Lost in his endless stream of women. Lost in being the ‘best of the best.”

“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. I was stupid. No, I was a shit. I was a bad man. I was a fornicator.” He spoke to something that was there, around him and in him. “I wrecked my family. Kathryn could have gotten better, if I’d been home. I know that. Please forgive me.”

He was panting, gasping for breath. “Ashley’s back. I don’t deserve her to be back. I don’t deserve
anything
. I did nothing to fix things. I sent her to that horrible place where she
died
. Ashley
died
. Cass
died
.

“And it’s my fault.” Will lay there for quite a while, arms stretched toward the flowerpot. He grew still.

Something was talking to him. I forgive you, my child.

That was it. He was forgiven. Something touched him, a delicate touch like being stroked by a feather. It caressed the top of his head. His eyes closed, but he wasn’t asleep. He dropped into something. Something he’d found at the Meeting, something he’d always known. The home of forgiveness, the home of peace, the home of joy and plenty and love. Softly suspended, it came to him, what he loved above all. He was forgiven and his dear one was there.

55

Soul Mates

“
D
r. Schierman wants
y’ to live here for as long as y’ want,” George Yeoman, leader of the village, drove them across the lawn in a cart. They stopped at a log cabin at the outskirts of the woods. “She built the cabins for the families of the patients in the hospital. Sure ‘n’ her own kiddies are there, but she brings in other patients too. They need to see their families, an’ sure enough work things out together.

“But they’re empty now, ‘cept for this one, which is the biggest.” George opened the door and they entered a wooden masterpiece. Rows of stacked logs made the walls. Huge beams projected inward from their tops, creating a soaring triangle of wood, the very high ceiling. “It’s not empty now, as ye’ll be livin’ here.”

“It’s like being inside a nut,” Ashley marveled, raising her chin to examine the latticework of logs and their warm, light brown color.

“Yeah, it’s that. We put some clothes in th’ closets an’ food in the kitchen. You’ll be staying here a while. Fer yer honeymoon, of course.” George blushed. “An’ y’ need to get settled as to what y’ want to do next. This is yer home. Ah’ll be biddin’ ye g’night.”

“Oh, look.” Ashley and Leroy explored their abode. “Come here.” She stood in the bedroom. It had the log walls of the cabin, but an amazing canopy bed filled much of the space. It was metal, wrought vines rising and intertwining from each corner, growing upward with leaves and blossoms so well made that they seemed to be real. A tiny sculptured hummingbird was attached to a blossom by its beak. The corners grew high and formed an arch over the center. A wedding bower. White silken draperies hung from the framework.

“It’s so romantic. And look at the flowers everywhere. They smell wonderful.” Ashley marveled at the vases of flowers. Grammie had done this, Grammie and her people. All the flowers were white. Roses, lilies, giant stars that exploded from purple centers, little bells that drooped. “It’s so beautiful.”

Leroy’s eyes stung. He’d wanted this for so long.

“I guess we should go to bed now,” Ashley said, looking determined. “We don’t have to do anything. Even though I want to, and I’m not a little girl, I think we should wait until I get older.”

“So do I.”

“I saw a night gown in the bedroom closet. Maybe they have something for you to wear in the bathroom.” She closed the closet door. She loved Leroy so much, but when the possibility of sex came close, Ashley wasn’t sure she wanted it.

The nightgown was a pale blue silk with a flowing skirt. It was pretty, but not low cut. It had a fine robe of the same material, a kimono. She put both of them on and sat on the side of the bed. “You can come in now.”

Leroy walked out of the bathroom and she whooped with laughter. “Oh my! What are those?”

He laughed too. He was wearing an enormous pair of flannel pajamas, bright red, printed with zany reindeer in white. Leroy said, “They glow in the dark too.”

“Turn the light off and let me see. They do! They glow! Grammie must have gotten them. She does things like that. They’re so funny. Oh, Leroy.” They laughed together. Everything got easier after that.

Natural as anything, they were in bed, lying side by side, holding hands.

Touching him made thrills of pleasure sparkle through her. Maybe …

“Darlin’, do you trust me?”

“Yes.” Leroy was breathtakingly beautiful lying so close.

“Grandfather told me what to do so we can be happy while you grow up.”

“What?”

“I’d like to take you somewhere. I started going there when I was four years old. It’s safe, just different.”

“Will it hurt?”

“No, sweetheart. Anything but that.” He took her hand and kissed it. “Do you want to go now?”

She nodded.

They were in a strange space, dim and gray-green. Nothing was there. Leroy stood next to her, wearing his crazy PJs, while she wore the gown and robe. She clutched his hand. The wind moaned, but she couldn’t feel it against her skin.

They moved toward something. Ashley realized it was a wall, a curtain wall the same murky color as the rest of the place. As they moved closer, the wall began to hum. Closer, and it ripped from top to bottom. Brilliant yellow light burst from it, from the other side. The light was like water, flowing into the dingy chamber.

Leroy pulled her through the opening. Light so bright and gold that it seemed a physical substance surrounded them. Went through them. It was inside her and outside her. It was like the electricity that had shocked her and Leroy when they touched. Shocking, not shocking. Exciting, calming.

She turned to him. He was illuminated, brilliant. Light shone from inside his mouth and eyes. She pulled away, but he let her know that it was safe. He pulled her farther inside. They fell down something, a tube, a slide. It twisted and turned like a waterslide in a park. It was funny. Leroy threw some gold stuff at her. She threw it back.

Fight! She laughed. They threw a brilliant substance at each other. He grabbed her and they rolled in it, gold spangles sticking to them. When they touched, bliss exploded. They were the center of the explosion, everything moving around them. Threads of bliss. Threads of meaning. Threads of love. Bound them, pulled them together.

Together—they shot together like mighty magnets grabbed them. Ashley couldn’t think. Time seemed to stop. She saw Leroy, next to her, his tummy pressed against her tummy. A moaning sound, the air in a cavern, surrounded them. The light pressed them together.

Ashley felt herself enlarge, open up. Her body expanded until it was huge, then larger than that. She filled the enormous grotto. She touched its sides, and then moved past them; nothing could contain her. Chimes sounded, and bells.

Leroy pulled her to him. Then he disappeared. Where he had been was an outline in nothing, and then nothingness itself. She looked at her arm. Transparent, just moving light. She separated more, expanding, until she saw herself floating in the bliss. Vast distances in space, and a tiny nugget here and there. A hard kernel suspended in infinity floated by.

Everything was like that, nothingness, emptiness, tiny elements of … What? And then she understood. Those were molecules, her molecules, and the space was how she really was. Her science teacher had told them that their bodies were mostly water, in compounds, but if you went deeper than that, all they were was nothingness and molecules. Atoms. Bits of existence. They were mostly nothing and could walk through walls or anything, if they got separated out enough.

Leroy was entering her. She could feel his bright dark soul, his nothingness. The joyous void. Kernels drifted by, so like her own. He was entering her, but not her body. Leroy joined with her spirit.

How long can an ocean of bliss last? How far is the universe from side to side? They lingered in paradise, mostly space with a few bits of matter. No one could be joined like a shaman and his mate.

Leroy was her, and she was him. Molecules of one were interspersed in the nothingness of each other. Up didn’t exist, nor down, nor space or time.

He filled her with himself and she gave back her soul.

He was lying next to her, one leg over hers, still in his pajamas. She had never seen such a beautiful man. She hadn’t seen
any
men, but even movie stars weren’t like him. They were married. They were really married. People could be wed for twenty years and have every kind of sex, and they wouldn’t be as joined as she and Leroy.

She watched him sleep for a while. Sunlight poured through the window. How long had they been in that place? Forever. They would live in bliss forever. That’s what Leroy brought.

Ashley knew she wasn’t a little girl.

56

A Princess

T
he smell of
bacon and coffee awakened her. Leroy was gone, the PJs lying on the floor. He was cooking breakfast. Ashley looked at her gown and kimono, feeling a bit embarrassed. She couldn’t wear them in front of him in the daylight; they belonged to that golden world.

The closet contained all sorts of clothes for her. She’d never seen them before and they were all new, but she liked them.

She selected blue jeans and a white cotton shirt printed with red squares. A little blue flower sat on the Xs where the red squares met. She tucked in the shirt and pulled on brand new boots, then tried to fix her face. She washed her face and arranged her hair.

Leroy seemed a little scary now. They were married. That was so weird.

“Hi, sweetheart!” His smile erased any fear. He was Leroy. Her husband. He was in the kitchen standing by the stove, a frying pan in one hand and another with a lid on it on a back burner.

“You know how to cook?” It seemed an amazing feat. Her father never entered the kitchen.

“Oh, yeah. I’m the barbecue king of the universe. I do pretty much everything else, too.”

Her legs seemed to melt and the room spun. Her head fell to one side as she dropped.

When she came to, he sat on the sofa, cradling her in his arms. Her face was nestled into his shoulder. She pulled back and looked at him. His were wide, terrified.

“Oh, sweetie. You fainted. I didn’t know what was happenin’. You’ve been through so much.”

Someone knocked at the door. “Rudi Heimlach here with George Zimmerman.”

“Come in,” Leroy called. “She’s here.”

Ashley jumped up, sitting erect. “Who are they?”

“I’m a psychiatrist and George is in internal medicine. We’re from Dr. Schierman’s hospital,” said the short one with the fat stomach.

“Oh, no!
Doctors
!” Ashley leapt to her feet. Her head began to swim again. Leroy grabbed her and held her tight in his lap. She grabbed his arm, beseeching. “Never let a
doctor
touch me, please, Leroy. Please. Never!” Panic overtook her ability to think. Her eyes rolled back.

He grabbed her upper arms and held her in front of his face. “Ashley, no one is ever going to hurt you again. No one, and nothing, and no doctors. You’re safe.”

She started whimpering and then crying, feeling like a stupid baby, but too scared to care.

“Leroy, we can do an exam with your help. You have the sensitivity. Feel her pulse, right here in her neck.” The internist touched his own neck to demonstrate. “Tell me how it counts out. Start.” He hit a button on his watch. “And then put your hand around her upper arm, tightly, and then release it slowly. Tell me the pressure you feel, and when a weaker beat comes in … Listen to her heart … Feel her tummy. Any lumps?” They gave him more instructions.

“That’s as much as I could do,” the one called the internist said. He spoke to Leroy, like she wasn’t there. Which was fine. “You’ll have to stay on the estate for a while until we can evaluate what’s going on, physically and mentally. You can see that some of the other is bleeding through.”

“What should I do?” Leroy looked almost as scared as she felt.

“Do what you’re doing. Be tender with her. Don’t have inter …”

“He did not have sex with me.” Ashley sat up. “He’s a very nice person and I’m too young. We’re going to wait until I’m eighteen.”

“That’s very good, Ashley,” said the fat one. “If you need to talk to me, I’m here.”

“I will never talk to you. I will talk to my husband.” She raised her head proudly.

They walked across the lawn toward the barn. She almost danced with excitement.

“Oh, shit, the dogs!” She cried when their baying reached her.

“Don’t worry.”

They gathered around Leroy, wagging their massive hind ends. Their tails had been cut off. He kneeled and petted them. “We’re gonna have to do something about this attitude of yours if I’m around here, boys. Whoever bred you with your faces flat like that ought to have a good thrashing. Come here, sugar, let me fix your nose.”

Ashley stared and Leroy pulled the animal’s smashed in snout out to a nice, pointy dog nose.

“You’ll get used to being that way. Give it an hour. See, you can smell better, and breathe better. OK, boys. My wife and I, do you know Ashley Watches? Isn’t she pretty? We’re going to go over here to the barn, but you be good. Don’t scare good people, just bad ones. You know the difference.”

Grammie’s barn seemed magical. It also seemed strange. Ashley had come there all her life. Everything looked bigger and wider and higher. So clean. Grammie’s thoroughbred horses were in their stalls and paddocks. She kept the horses, even though she couldn’t ride anymore. There weren’t very many these days.

“Over here, Ashley. This is what I wanted to show you.”

She walked to the end of the row of stalls he indicated.

“Look in there. What do you think?”

Ashley peered through the slats on the top half of the stall. Her eyes widened. “Oh, my! She’s beautiful. She’s the most beautiful horse I’ve ever seen!” A mare looked back at her, obviously a mare; every hair on her body was feminine. Her coat was almost white, just a few dapples of dark coat indicating that she had been born black. Her eyes were bright as angels’ and her expression, sweeter.

“Look at her. Her eyes are so big.” The animal saw Ashley and walked toward her, sniffing delicately though the bars. “She’s like a princess.”

“That’s what she is: a purebred, Section D Welsh Cob. She’s the kind of horse the English queens used to ride. I saw her in England and had to have her for you. She arrived yesterday.

“Do you want to go in and see her?” Ashley nodded, feeling afraid, the way she always did around horses, even though she didn’t let it show. “This one won’t hurt you.” He picked up a halter and slipped into the stall, quickly haltering the mare. “You can come in now.”

“Oh, she’s so soft.” Ashley petted the mare’s cheek and then her neck.

“I’ve got a couple of carrots in my pocket if you’d like to give them to her. She’s not grabby.”

Sure enough, the grey mare gently took the carrots and ate delicately.

“I’m not afraid of her, Leroy. She’s nice.”

“That’s why I got her for you. I knew. There’s a story about her, Ashley, but I’ll tell you in a little while.”

Ashley spun around and grabbed him. “I love you. You’re the best person in the world. No one is better than you. You make me so happy! Thank you!”

Leroy laughed. “I don’t know that I’m that good, but I could pick out this horse.”

A horse on the other side of the barn raised a racket, banging the stall door with its front hooves.

“Come over here, Ashley. Here’s another horse I found in England.” A much taller, bulkier horse stood in the stall, nodding its head up and down impatiently. His back hung a little and his lips drooped.

“OK, Lightning, we’ll pay attention to you. I rode him in a polo game. He’s a great horse. Still has years and years of riding in him. Which I intend to give him.” Leroy laughed.

“Can we ride them?”

“That’s what they’re for.”

“Today?”

“If you feel up to it.”

“Yes. They’re both grey. We have matched horses! We can ride around on matched horses!”

A shadow darkened the entrance to the barn. Ashley looked up and saw her father outlined in the arch.