Infinite (Strange and Beautiful, Book 1) (65 page)

“Thank
you,” I breathed. “I love it.”

And
it was true. I’d been one of those kids with an overabundance of stuffed
animals. I used to sleep nearly buried in them. I’d finally allowed Mom to
store the majority of them away in the attic. A few of my most treasured
stuffed animals still resided on my bed. I wondered if Jackson noticed that the
one time he’d been in my room or if it was just a lucky coincidence.

For
his part, Jackson also seemed impressed with my gift to him. “I admire your
craftiness,” he grinned.

Due
to limited funds and not wanting to ask my parents for money for a gift for my
boyfriend, I decided to use my imagination and make him something. It felt
somewhat unoriginal, but all I could come up with was a mix CD. Given Jackson’s
gift to me at Christmas, I thought he would appreciate it though.

Since
I lacked Jackson’s artistic ability, I spent all of Sunday piecing together
pictures I’d taken of Jackson and I in the last month and a half with my new
camera while using some scrapbooking supplies Mom gave me to create the cover
art. I decided on a romantic theme, choosing songs that were both sexy and
sweet by artists that ranged from independent and obscure to popular and
current. I called it “Jackson and Silly’s Monster Make-Out Mix.” I was pretty
pleased with the result, and I thought Jackson could appreciate my effort.

“I
know, I know,” I said in answer to Jackson’s comment. “It’s not as extravagant
as the one you made me, but Skylar apparently got all of the artistic ability,
so I had to improvise.”

“No,
really, Silly,” Jackson smiled, studying my handiwork. “It’s great.”

He
looked up then and leaned over, wrapping his long arms around and pulling me
close in a warm embrace. Once he released me, he stood and carried the CD case
with him over to the entertainment center. He removed the disc and popped it
into the player, fiddled with some knobs and buttons and then suddenly the room
was filled with the sound of the haunting music and sultry sound of Meredith
Brooks singing a litany of questions about what would happen because of a kiss.

I
smiled as the music filled the room, and Jackson grinned back as he said, “I’ll
be right back.”

He
disappeared into the next room and returned a moment later with a plate filled
with fresh strawberries and a bowl of chocolate sauce. “Dessert,” he explained
as he sank back down on the floor beside me.

“Looks
yummy,” I replied as Jackson plucked up a strawberry and dipped it into the
chocolate. He lifted it and brought it to my mouth. Grinning sheepishly, I
opened my mouth and took a bite. I moaned at the sweet flavors as I took
another bite of the strawberry.

Jackson
smiled as he finished the last bite. Then I picked up another strawberry and
dipped it in the chocolate and brought it Jackson’s lips.

“This
is the best Valentine’s Day I’ve ever had,” I admitted between bites.

“Me
too,” Jackson agreed, leaning in and kissing me firmly on the lips. His mouth
tasted sweetly of the chocolate and strawberries he’d just swallowed. When he
pulled away, his lips were swollen red, and I was certain mine looked much the
same. I just hoped it that would fade before I got home.

I
picked up another strawberry and dipped it in chocolate. As I lifted it to
Jackson’s mouth, some of the rich liquid cocoa dripped from the strawberry,
landing on my other arm.

“Oops,”
I giggled as Jackson bit into the strawberry I held. I looked around for a
napkin to wipe away the chocolate, but before I could locate one, Jackson
lifted my arm and licked the chocolate away with one swipe.

I
swallowed hard and bit my lip. My face burned brightly as he brought his lips
to mine once more. He sucked lightly on my bottom lip before kissing from my
jaw down to my neck. I felt a knot building in my stomach, but I wasn’t sure
what it was from. Nervousness? Anticipation? I couldn’t say; all I was certain
of was that I didn’t want him to stop.

He
wrapped an arm around my waist, pulling me closer. I brought my hands up to
rest on his shoulders as he brought his other arm around me. He brought his
lips back to mine, and this time I darted my tongue out experimentally.
Normally, I was too shy to make that first move and let Jackson deepen our
kisses, but I was feeling a bit brave. He parted his lips instantly, and he
touched his tongue to mine as his hands slid from my waist up to the small of
my back.

My
arms tightened around his shoulders as we moved simultaneously, almost as if
synchronized, until I was lying on my back. In the back of my mind, I felt awed
by how smoothly we’d moved together. Normally, I was so clumsy. Tripping.
Falling. Running into things. My hand eye coordination was usually sorely
lacking. With Jackson it was different; we seemed to click in some strange and
mysterious way.

I
almost laughed at my ridiculousness. I was lying on the floor with Jackson
holding his weight away from me with one hand as his body heat surrounded me
and his other hand slid up from my waist toward my chest, and here I was
thinking about coordination. I forced my brain to shut off and tried to focus on
the sensation of Jackson’s hands on me, but as he hesitantly cupped my left
breast with his right hand, I couldn’t help but thank heavens I’d finally grown
some breasts.

My
whole body felt warm, and I was glad Jackson’s lips were back on mine because I
wasn’t sure I could handle feeling his eyes on me while he felt me up. The
thought alone was mortifying enough. Somewhere in the back of my stupid
mind—that refused to shut up and enjoy—it occurred to me that I had just made
it to second base—sexually speaking, of course—for the first time. Although, it
occurred to me, I’d never made it to second base when we’d played baseball in
P.E. either.

This
was all so new and thrilling. It was also a bit nerve-wracking as well. Doubts
about how I was faring with my more experienced boyfriend tried to worm their
way into my head, but I calmed myself by combing the fingers of one hand
through Jackson’s soft hair. When I experimentally massaged his scalp, he
moaned against my mouth.

It
was encouraging, but my thoughts scattered when Jackson’s thumb brushed against
the most sensitive part of my breast. The most awesome sensation jolted through
my entire body, and I chastised myself for ever thinking—aside from
breastfeeding that—nipples were useless.

I
moaned into our kiss, unable to stop the noise from escaping, and Jackson
smiled against my mouth. He lifted his eyes and they met mine. He didn’t speak,
but instead smiled gently. The corners of my lips lifted, mirroring his smile,
and he leaned in once more and kissed me softly, chastely before he pulled
away, rolling onto his back.

I
turned my head to watch him as he took a few deep, steadying breaths. After a
moment he reached over and took my hand. He lifted it to his chest and just
held it there. I studied him as he stared up at the ceiling. He finally cleared
his throat, closing his eyes, as he said, “I think maybe we should watch a
movie.”

I
felt faintly disappointed that our make-out session was over, but a warm,
fluttery feeling seemed to fill my belly as I realized that the suggestion had
nothing to do with his own desire to stop but more to do with respect for me
and my boundaries.

Valentine’s
Day was easily one of the best experiences of my life. Of course making out was
great, but my favorite part of the night was when Jackson and I cuddled on the
couch—after making out—while watching a movie. We stayed out until the hour
grew late. Not wanting to be late for curfew, Jackson drove me home, holding my
hand the entire way. Then he walked me to the front door, and we ended what I
could only think of as a perfect, romantic night with an amazing kiss.

My
joy was only slightly tarnished by Luke lurking in the foyer when I entered the
house. I could only hope he hadn’t been watching us kiss like some kind of
creeper. In truth, I was surprised he was home. I’d have thought he’d have
plans, but, then again, he really hadn’t been seeing anyone—seriously or
casually—since Brooke. The band had taken priority above all else, which
reminded me of what Skylar had told me earlier.

“I
hear you’re not playing baseball this year,” I commented by way of greeting.

Luke
stopped pacing in the doorway. His eyes narrowed as he stared me down. “Where’d
you hear that?”

“A
little birdy told me.” I shrugged off my coat, ignoring Luke’s intense stare.

“Skylar,”
he muttered. “She didn’t say anything to Mom or Dad, did she?”

“I
don’t think so. Not unless she did it after I left with Jackson.” As I opened
the coat closet, I heard Luke exhale, obviously relieved. “When are you going
to break the news to Dad?”

“Shit,
I don’t know,” Luke muttered. I glanced at him over my shoulder. His hands were
buried in his hair and his eyes were closed. The stress was plain on his face
and sympathy swelled within me.

“Maybe
you should talk to Mom first,” I suggested, relaying my earlier thoughts. “She
might be able to help soften the blow.”

Luke
grimaced, shaking his head. I knew, instinctively, he wasn’t saying no to my
suggestion. He was likely thinking that there would be no way to soften the
news that would likely both break our father’s heart and send down the wrath of
God.

I
considered making the request that he not tell Dad when I was around because I
wasn’t sure I wanted to be in the crossfire, but I was certain that would do
nothing to help Luke’s obvious anxiety. Instead, I wished him luck, patting him
on the arm, as I made my way to the stairs.

Skylar
arrived shortly after I did. She came into the bathroom as I was washing the
makeup from my face. Her hair was in disarray, her clothes wrinkled and her
makeup smeared. She also had a dreamy smile plastered on her face, and I could
only assume that dinner and sex beat out dinner and a party. From the look of
things, Skylar wasn’t disappointed in the least.

Luke
also appeared at the doorway to the bathroom, dressed in his nightwear—lounge
pants and a ratty t-shirt, so I assumed he’d come to brush his teeth before
bed. He glanced from me to Skylar, and then his nose wrinkled. “God, woman,” he
scowled. “You need to shower. You reek of sex.”

Skylar’s
dreamy smile shifted into a proud grin. Luke made a noise that made his disgust
evident, and I grimaced, hurrying to wash away the rest of the facial cleanser.

“You’re
just jealous,” Skylar shrugged as Luke shouldered past her into the room to
grab his toothbrush. Certain that Luke and Skylar were about to have another of
their spiteful spats, I dried my face quickly and made to flee from the room.
“I bet even Silly got more action tonight than you did.”

I
groaned as Luke’s head snapped in my direction, looking me over as if the
thought had only just occurred to him. I guessed then that he hadn’t seen
Jackson and I kissing at the front door. I didn’t even bother to address
Skylar’s claim and dashed to my room, hoping that Luke wouldn’t get a bug up
his ass and decide to come after my boyfriend in some misguided attempt to
actually act like an older brother.

The
next afternoon at school, as I recounted the evening Jackson had planned for
us, Tegan said that
I
had a ridiculously dreamy smile on my face that
probably could have rivaled Skylar’s. At first I’d been a little unsure if I
should tell Tegan about my night with Jackson. I’d always thought it was stupid
when girls ran and gushed to their friends, revealing all of the gory details
of their relationship. I’d always thought it was somewhat disrespectful to
their boyfriends because some things just seemed like they should remain
private.

After
Valentine’s Day, though, my opinion wavered just a bit. It seemed impossible
not to tell Tegan. I felt like a blubbering, giggly fool. Instead of giving her
a play by play of every little detail, I glossed over some parts of the
night—namely kissing and being felt up—but she seemed to be able to read
between the lines and understand that a little more happened than I was saying.

Once
I’d finished with the retelling of the previous evening, Tegan confessed that
she was still a little uneasy about her gift from Mark. Even though the roses
were sent anonymously, she knew who they were from. I was still trying to ease
her into the idea of giving Mark a chance. 

To
his credit, Mark had been good about not crowding her. He still complimented
her and made casual conversation, but he was just as nervous as Tegan. He’d
been ecstatic when I told him what Tegan had said about giving him a chance as
long as he stopped the bullying completely.

“No
problem,” he’d shrugged easily. “I haven’t done that in months.”

I’d
suspected as much, and it was good to hear it confirmed. With Tegan tentatively
open to the idea of a date, Mark asked me for advice on what to do or where to
go. Because of his nervousness, I half wondered if he’d ever been out on a date
before. I wasn’t stupid enough to ask.

A
couple of days after Valentine’s Day, I overheard Stevie talking to Nick and
Toby before the start of band practice about some of the upcoming concerts.
Mark and Robby hadn’t arrived yet, and Luke was inside talking to Mom. I
thought it might be about baseball, which made sense because Dad was working
late; therefore, it would be one of the rare moments when Luke could talk to
Mom without Dad overhearing.

Most
of the concerts Stevie, Nick or Toby mentioned were for more obscure bands, but
it did give me an idea to pitch to Mark. Instead of sticking around for band
practice, I went upstairs to my room to do a little research. When I told Mark
my idea, he seemed excited; both because he finally had an idea what to do on a
date and because the tickets were fairly cheap.