Intent (7 page)

“Lily can help out from time to time, but she wouldn’t be available full time.” My chin drops to my chest and my eyes squeeze shut as I contemplate my next step. “As much as I hate to do this, I don’t have any other choice.”

“What?” Justin asks, finally looking at me.

“I have to ask Layne. I’ve known her all of a month.”

“You know she’s a good person if Marcia let her stay in her cabin until the end of summer,” Justin points out.

“She’s great with River. There’s no doubt they already love each other. They’re as thick as thieves. But I haven’t known her long enough to impose on her like this. She’ll think I’m a complete loser.”

“Not if you explain it to her,” Justin argues. “Wait. Why do you care what she thinks of you anyway? You said she’s here alone and she’s leaving at the end of the summer. What else does she have to do?”

“She didn’t come here to babysit for me on her vacation.”

“That’s a long vacation by anyone’s standards.” With his pointed look and his doubting tone fully intact, he turns to face me. “Why is she really here?”

I’ve honestly wondered the same damn thing at least a hundred times a day. I have my suspicions, but she’s been careful to avoid too many personal conversations. The things she says and what she doesn’t say clue me in, but her deep blue eyes leave no mistake. Even though he’s my best friend, I can’t share my hunches without feeling like I’ve betrayed her, so I stick to what I know for sure. “She hasn’t said.”

“Uh-huh.” Justin crosses his arms over his chest. “If you don’t want to tell me, just say so. I understand patient and girlfriend confidentiality.”

“It’s not that,” I counter. “She honestly hasn’t said why she’s here or even where she’s from. Even though that New York accent she swears she doesn’t have tells me exactly where she’s from.”

“So she’s not your girlfriend?”

“No. You know better than that.”

“A lot of people in town are talking about how much time the two of you are spending together. I’ve even heard the word ‘wedding’ thrown around.”

“People love to make up shit, man. They live vicariously through everyone else because their own lives are so dull.”

“I get to be your best man. If you pick anyone else, I won’t show up for your wedding.”

“The day I never get married, you can be my best man,” I agree.

“Your bachelor party will be epic.” Justin’s eyes glaze over as he looks off into the distance, visualizing my imaginary bachelor party.

“Yeah, I’m sure it’ll go down in history, never to be topped,” I deadpan. “Can you be serious for a minute?”

“She’s your girlfriend. She loves your daughter. Of course she’ll babysit for you. Every girl in this county drools over you when you walk by. Why would she be any different?”

That’s just it, Justin. She is different from every girl in this county, in every way.

“She’s not my girlfriend,” I emphasize.

“So then you won’t mind if I ask her out?”

“You already have a girlfriend.”

“Things aren’t great between us,” Justin admits.

“Sorry to hear that, man. Anything you want to talk about?”

“Not with you. Maybe Layne will lend a sympathetic ear my way, though.”

“Stay away from her,” I warn, the edge in my voice as sharp as a razor.

A slow, shit-eating grin covers Justin’s face. “I knew it.”

“You lied to me about you and Karen for that?” I spit out.

“No, I didn’t lie about Karen and me. Things aren’t great and haven’t been for some time. It is time we just split before we end up hating each other. If you’re not interested in Layne, though…” He intentionally lets his voice trail off for a few thick seconds. “She’s gorgeous. Everyone who’s met her has said she’s incredible. Tara has a huge girl-crush on her.”

“Your little sister is easily swayed,” I laugh. “But you’ve heard correctly. She’s a great person. And you stay away from her.”

Justin smirks at me, knowing me way too well. “When are you bringing her by here to meet me?”

“I’m leaving now. I’ve spent enough quality time with you today.”

“You know she has to get the best friend’s stamp of approval,” he calls to my back as I walk toward my truck.

“You want to ask her out. She already has your approval.”

When I get home, River and Layne are in the backyard, sitting on the bank with their fishing poles and their feet in the water. “You know you’re scaring the fish off with your feet splashing around in the water.”

“We know, but we’re still having fun.” When Layne looks up at me, pure happiness radiates from her beautiful face. She hasn’t seemed this happy since she got here. My curiosity is piqued.

“What have you been up to since I saw you earlier today?” I ask Layne.

“Rose called me this afternoon and asked if I could keep River. She said she got an earlier flight to Texas and didn’t want to bother you at work again,” she explains. “We’ve had an awesome time together.”

“She left early? And didn’t tell me?” I can’t believe Rose would do that.

“Yep, she did, Daddy,” River confirms. “I told her to call Laynie because I wanted to stay with her.”

“I’m sorry she put that burden on you unexpectedly like that.” I apologize, even though I know I’m about to ask her to take on this burden for most of the summer.

“It’s not a burden, honestly. She said you’d probably need someone to keep River while she’s away the next couple of months. She can stay with me, if you want. I mean, if you don’t have someone else already in mind.”

The thing about Layne is she has no idea how completely wonderful she is. She is blissfully unaware of how people around her seem to fall under her spell without any effort on her part. She doesn’t have a clue how badly I want to pull her into my arms and kiss her senseless at this very second. It’s taking all of my willpower to keep from doing just that.

My reply is as honest as I can be with her. “Layne, I’m not thinking of anyone else at all.”

L
ayne

S
omehow
, I’m able to hold my groan inside. I just blurted it out, without a filter or a second thought of what I was offering. This summer was a time for me to get away from everything, regroup and find myself and recharge my batteries. The point is, this summer was my chance to focus on myself for a change. It was all about me.

Now I’m a babysitter until school starts at the end of August and she goes to prekindergarten class. The bad part is he didn’t even ask me to do it. This is all on me because I volunteered, like an idiot. My eyes drop to River and I instantly feel bad for even thinking that. She’s the reason why I volunteered for this job in the first place. In the short time I’ve spent with River, I’ve gotten so deeply attached to her that it concerns me a little. At this rate, I’m not sure how I’ll be able to leave her at the end of the summer.

The more time I spend with her, and the more time I spend with Ace, the more my feelings become all jumbled up inside my head and my heart. Over the past month, I’ve spent time with him every day and sometimes well into the night after River has gone to bed. The more I get to know the cocky, rude man I first met in that pasture, the more I realize that’s not his demeanor at all. The more I watch how great he is with River, the harder it is to stay away from both of them. Even though I know that’s exactly what I need to do.

One thing I refuse to do is fall into the rebound relationship trap. It’s bad enough when that happens between two consenting adults, but River changes everything.

Our outing last night was actually pretty incredible. I’m not calling it a date. He didn’t call it a date. We had plenty of people openly gawking at us as we had dinner together, and while we kicked back in the lawn chairs and watched the movie together under the stars. We spoke in hushed whispers about the movie, our faces close to each other so we didn’t disturb the other people. We laughed and talked and even sat in comfortable silence. It felt good to have a friend again. When he drove me home, he didn’t even try to kiss me. He put no pressure on me at all.

So why did I feel so conflicted about it?

Thoughts of last night are still on my mind as River and I walk into the diner. “What are you two doing today?” Tara asks as we take our seats. The inflection in her voice doesn’t quite hide her surprise to see us together in the middle of the day.

“Just time to feed the munchkin some lunch.” My reply is nonchalant, but I feel every eye in the restaurant boring into me. Curiosity may have killed the cat, but the nosy people in this small, Southern town are alive and well.

“Is Rose not babysitting her anymore?” Tara asks with no hint of modesty.

“Yes, she will be. She’s just away visiting family for a little while, and I volunteered to watch River while she’s gone. It really isn’t a big deal.”

“Are you being good for Miss Layne?” Tara asks River.

“Course,” she replies matter-of-factly, causing me to stifle a laugh.

After we finish eating lunch, River and I stroll through the park until we reach the edge of the water. River looks up and smiles sweetly at me. “Let’s go see my daddy at work.”

Ace’s suggestion for me to come by the facility sometime reverberates through my mind and I mull it over for a few seconds.

“Come on, Laynie. Let’s go see Daddy.”

“Okay, we’ll go by there and see him. But if he’s too busy working, we have to leave right away. Deal?”

“Deal.” She nods her head excitedly while she jumps up and down on her toes.

“You are too cute and you know it.” I laugh and shake my head. “Come on.”

River chatters about anything and everything on the ride to the equine rehabilitation facility, but all I can think about is I’m showing up unannounced at Ace’s place of employment. The whole town already thinks there’s something going on between us, and this will only strengthen that belief.

But will he think it’s anything more than his daughter wants to see him?

Is that actually all this visit is about?

“Here we are,” I announce nervously. “Now, remember what I said, River. If he’s busy, we have to leave and let him work.”

“Okay, Laynie.”

We walk hand in hand across the gravel drive, follow the dirt path around the side of the building, and the round pen comes into view. Ace is inside the ring with Frankie, his white T-shirt soaked with sweat and clinging to his body. When he takes his hat off, the sweat rolls down his face and he lifts the hem of his shirt to wipe off his brow. The ripples of his stomach mesmerize me and I stop walking dead in my tracks.

“Uncle Justin!” River yells and rushes toward the man standing outside the round pen.

“Squirt!” He affectionately calls back to her and scoops her up in his arms when she reaches him. His gaze scans in my direction and a knowing look settles in his expression. “And you must be Layne. I’ve heard a lot about you.”

“That’s right. And you are?” I’m positive I just got busted practically drooling over Ace. Kill me now.

“Figures he wouldn’t have even mentioned me to you,” he scoffs with a chuckle. “I’m Justin Ramsey, Ace’s best friend and partner in crime.”

“Nice to meet you, Justin. I’m Layne Elliott, Ace’s temporary neighbor and River’s human toy.”

Justin throws his head back laughing. “I happen to know exactly what you mean by that.”

“Don’t believe a word he says about me. He lies like a crazy man,” Ace jokes as he walks up. He wipes his palms on his jeans and takes River from Justin. “How’s my best girl?”

“Daddy,” River laughs, “I’m your
only
girl.”

“That’s right. I forgot,” Ace replies.

“Laynie can be your girl. She’s so pretty,” River suggests.

My cheeks immediately heat and an uncomfortable current is palpable in the air around us. Justin tries to contain his smile but his eyes give him away. “You’re prettier, River,” I counter and change the subject as quickly as possible.

“What are you doing here, Squirt?” Justin asks.

“I wanted to see my daddy, Uncle Justin, so Laynie brought me.”

“Your daddy?” he asks, exaggerating his displeasure. “I thought for sure you came to see me.”

“Nah.” She shakes her head nonchalantly before laying her cheek on Ace’s shoulder.

We all laugh at her innocent candor and I watch River and Ace together. He squeezes her tighter into him, protectively and lovingly, and kisses her head. The gesture is just so heart-melting to watch, and he obviously loves his precocious daughter more than life itself. The bond between them is unmistakable and I find myself feeling envious of it. Not because of the way he loves his daughter, but because I’m so desperate for a child to love myself.

“Looked like you were having a little trouble with Frankie,” I remark and nod toward the round pen.

One corner of Ace’s mouth lifts in amusement before he replies. “Yeah, I don’t think he likes me quite as much as he likes you.”

“Why don’t you go try?” Justin asks.

“Man, I don’t know about that,” Ace interjects before I can reply.

“No, it’s okay. I don’t mind trying,” I volunteer. “He does seem to like me.”

An odd glance passes between Ace and Justin, momentarily making me doubt my decision. But then Justin points toward the round pen and smiles warmly as he says, “Let’s see what you got, Layne. Show Ace how it’s done.”

Feigning confidence I don’t really feel, I walk toward the round pen. Just as I get to the gate, Justin reaches around me to open it for me. “Let me help you with that.”

“Thanks, Justin.”

Frankie is watching me carefully as I enter the pen, but he’s standing on the complete opposite side. His rear is partially turned toward me, telling me he’s leery of my presence, and the whites of his eyes are clearly visible, telling me he’s frightened. To try to avoid scaring him even more, I slowly move to the side of the pen and sit on the top rail of the panel. Watching Frankie takes me back to that day just a few weeks ago when he approached me in the pasture. He seemed like a completely different horse then.

I was sitting on a large rock, my heart breaking all over again as the images of Bobby and Cyndi played on a loop in my mind. The words that were spoken, the shattered and tattered mess that was left of me as I walked out of his apartment, and the feeling of complete and utter defeat covers me again as I sit here. It’s like a thick blanket that nearly suffocates me and makes it hard to catch my breath.

With all my might, I swallow the lump in my throat that threatens to erupt into a sob, or maybe even a guttural scream. Blinking back the tears, I stare at the ground and try to get my racing heart and shallow breathing back under control. The soft, velvety kiss to my cheek startles me out of my haze, and I look up and see the most beautiful brown eyes—full of compassion, understanding, and empathy.

Frankie’s soft muzzle brushes my cheek again after I reach up to scratch behind his ear. “Hello, handsome,” I whisper to him. “You need love, too, don’t you?”

Frankie stands still as I slide off the rail and step into him. His head goes over my shoulder, as if he’s hugging me, and I wrap my arms around his neck. While I continue to whisper soothing words to him, my fingers drag back and forth across his slick coat in my way of conveying love and acceptance. He huffs softly and he hangs his head even lower, and I’m convinced he understands the meaning behind what I’m doing.

“Layne, do you want to brush him?” Ace asks softly from behind me.

Without releasing Frankie, I turn my head slightly and look over at Ace. He’s still on the outside of the pen, but his arm is outstretched toward me with a brush in his hand. I take it from him and begin brushing Frankie from my current spot, down his throat and chest as far as my arm will reach. I’m not ready to lose this connection, and I sense Frankie isn’t either. He didn’t move when Ace approached. He didn’t move when I took the brush. He hasn’t moved since I started brushing him. If anything, he seems more relaxed and very content.

After I switch hands, I brush the other side of his neck and chest in the same way. Just from watching his contentment, it helps me to release the anxiety that almost consumed me. Taking one step to the side, I keep my free hand on him so I don’t lose our link and start brushing his side. Long minutes pass as I work my way all the way around him. One stroke at a time, sometimes using calming words and sometimes just using my touch, I brush every inch of him. By the time I finish, I feel tears of joy pricking the back of my eyes.

It’s been far too long since I’ve felt happiness like this.

I miss it.

“Hand me the brush and take this lead. Clip it to his halter, just under his chin,” Ace instructs softly. I do as he says and hold the lead rope in my hand. “Just walk him around the pen and see how he does.”

Frankie hasn’t taken his eyes off me, and it feels like he’s trying to communicate with me through his expressions. The whites of his eyes are not visible, so I know enough to know he trusts me. “Let’s take a walk, Frankie. Just you and me.” I turn and begin walking with the lead rope held loosely in my hand. I’m more than pleased when I glance over my shoulder and see he’s willingly following me. “You’re such a good boy,” I praise.

We make a few laps around the pen together, change directions, and zigzag across the pen, while Ace, River, and Justin watch. But honestly, Frankie and I don’t even acknowledge their presence. They just fade into the background and we enjoy our time together, even if it is in a round pen instead of the open pasture. We stop at the end of the pen that overlooks the pasture and river below to just take in the scenery.

Frankie places his muzzle against my arm and leaves it there, touching me. I’m so mesmerized by the sight and overwhelmed from the swell of emotion in my chest, that I’m just as startled as Frankie is when Ace approaches us from behind. Frankie suddenly jumps, every muscle in his immense body tenses, and his veins pop out. He jerks his head up and back, pulling the lead rope through my hand and leaving a slight rope burn in its wake.

“Whoa,” Ace commands. His voice is low but stern. However, Frankie doesn’t seem to appreciate it. “I said, whoa!”

“Whoa, boy.” I mimic his words, but I use the tone Frankie’s accustomed to hearing from me. I step in between Frankie and Ace and hold my hand out to him. Frankie lowers his head to me, but his gaze keeps darting between Ace and me. “It’s okay, buddy. I’m here with you.”

“Unclip the lead rope from his halter,” Ace instructs. “Good, now hand it to me and open that gate in front of you so he can go graze.”

Frankie trots out of the pen several yards and then he stops, turns to look at me, and our eyes lock. Is he waiting for me to follow him? “You can go now. You need to eat. It’s okay, Frankie,” I try to assure him. And myself.

Ace closes the gate and Frankie neighs before he eventually trots off in search of the perfect blade of grass. My feet feel like they’re inside cement shoes because I can’t move. It’s possible that I’m still breathing, but I’m not positive. I’m experiencing the strangest mixture of feelings as I watch this majestic buckskin horse gallop across the field. Part of me is glad he’s able to run and enjoy his freedom. Another part of me wants him back by my side.

The weight of multiple eyes staring at me settles on my chest and pulls me from the hypnotic trance Frankie had me under. A quick glance around me reveals that both Justin and Ace are watching me intently. Their gazes seem to penetrate my thoughts and I feel as transparent as glass, like I’m standing naked in an enormous picture window. It’s strange; I can stand in a courtroom full of people and argue a case. It’s no problem for me to confront the person across the table from me during a deposition. But under the scrutiny of these two men, I feel my bravado waning.

“That was incredible! I think I’m in love with Frankie.” My smile covers my face, but even I don’t feel it past the surface level, so I doubt I’m fooling them. The silence was becoming way too uncomfortable for me to bear, though.

“He seems to be very smitten with you, too. Should we expect wedding invitations soon?” Justin laughs good-naturedly.