Is It Wrong to Try to Pick Up Girls in a Dungeon? (12 page)

There she is, and she’s carrying a big basket.

“You are going to the Dungeon soon, aren’t you? Please take this with you.”

“Eh?”

“The chef baked our rations this morning, so they are very fresh. I did touch a few of them, though…”

“That’s okay, but why?”

“Would you believe me if I said I wanted to?”

She tilts her head, has that same shy smile from before.

She looks so kind, gentle… I can’t refuse that face.

Maybe she’s rooting for me…? Cheering me on?

“… Thank you. I’ll eat them before I go into the Dungeon today.”

I’ll take the basket, but I can’t keep smiling with you. My cheeks hurt…

She’s looking at me funny again. Her cheeks are going pink, too. I like her giggle, though.

“The boy’s ’ere, eh?”

A voice from behind the bar, the door hinges are still creaking. Mama Mia…

Damn, she takes over a room! Gotta get out of here!!

No, I can’t do that. Turn and face her.

Even for a dwarfess, she’s pretty big. Her shoulders are double mine…

“Ah! I gotcha. Came back to pay the money, did ya? Ain’t that nice o’ you.”

“You’re… welcome.”

“Syr, take a break, eh? You been in ’n’ out all day.”

“Yes, sure.”

She makes a quiet bow. Mama Mia is coming this way! She’s smiling, not a warm hearty smile, a bold smile. Uhff. That’s her meaty hand square on my shoulder…

Now she’s talking…

“If ya hadn’ come back, we woulda released the hounds ta find ya!”

Gulp.

“If you’d been a day later, I’da enjoyed hearing me prey squeal again.”

To think, I almost died twice in one night… She would have killed me…

Nice save, Bell! Nice save.

“Syr, that’s your lunch he’s carryin’. Ya okay with that?”

“Oh, yes. Missing lunch isn’t that big of a deal.”

“Why is okay to go hungry and give him nyour lunch, nya?”

“It just—”

“Oh-oh! Don’t be rude nyow! You two are like that, nya? He’s nyour—”

“Not that!”

I think Syr chased after the catgirl, but I couldn’t watch them… There is someone a bit more important with her hand on my shoulder.

I will never do anything out of line in front of Mama Mia again, ever.

“Be sure ’n’ say thanks ta Syr. Lot o’ us here are not as forgivin’ as she is. In fact, if she ’adn’t said okay, you’d be swimming with fishes ’bout now.”

“……”

She’s serious…

“Syr chased after ya that night, but she couldn’t find ya. Came back all depressed, mopin’ around. That there elf, Lyu, grabbed a claymore from the back. Wasn’ easy stoppin’ ’er from huntin’ ya down.”

I may like elves, but I’m a long way from understanding them.

But… Syr chased after me… even when I was like that…

A new fire sparked to life in my chest. A good one this time.

I am really in Syr’s debt. I have to figure out a way to repay her someday.

“… Oi, boy!”

“What is it?”

“Bein’ an adventurer isn’t for those who just look the part. Just fight to survive at first. Once ya build up a bit, the worst rarely happens.”

My eyes shoot wide open.

Does she know? She was at the bar then, so maybe she overheard everything?

Wait, she’s smiling at me?

“The best is always the last one standing, ya hear? No matter what it takes. Come on back an’ I’ll fix ya up with a large ale! Hey, ya won, didn’t ya?”

Mama… Mia…!

“Don’ be givin’ me that weird face! Now head out, will ya? Yer in the way!”

Suddenly, a massive force spins me around and guides me out the door.

I may be out of breath, but coming back here was the best decision I’ve made in days!

I feel like the last of the shadows from the other night are finally gone.
Loki Familia
’s animal guy, I haven’t forgotten what he said. But now it doesn’t make me angry. It’s fuel for my journey.

Do what you can now, as fast as you can, without doing too much. Just focus on surviving.

Sounds like the perfect plan to me.

“Oi, boy! I’ve said this much already, don’ ya go dyin’ on me now, ya clear?”

“I won’t! Thank you again!”

I feel so alive!

“I’m heading out!” I yell back into the bar before heading into the crowded street.

Night.

A bright moon floats above the curtain of darkness that has fallen over the land. The moonlit forest is alive with the sounds of owls and rustling leaves.

These sounds ride the breeze and spread out over a vast plain to merge with chirping birds and swishing grasses. They flow together in a chorus of nature until the sounds hit one sudden change in the landscape.

A very big wall.

Big, thick, and sturdy, the edge of the city may as well be a castle wall.

The protective wall is constructed completely out of stone. The curtain of night is pushed aside as light spreads throughout the city. The voices of nature outside the wall are drowned out by the din of the city’s nightlife.

The Labyrinth City, Orario.

Orario is one of the few cities that have existed since ancient times, even before the arrival of the gods. However, it is the only “labyrinth” city.

The wall forms a perfect circle, encasing the metropolis in stone. Relatively tall towers and buildings stick up just inside the edges of the wall. Shorter buildings are toward the center. This stone behemoth is lit by hundreds of magic stone lamps. It’s as if a sea of stars came down from the sky to live in a stone castle.

One tower in the very center of Orario looks tall enough to pierce the clouds.

The tallest tower in the city, its imposing shadow strikes awe into the citizenry. Visitors come from far and wide to see the tower and bask in its glory.

The tower is directly over the entrance to the Dungeon below. Known as “Babel,” its main purpose is to be a “lid.” With Babel at its core, the image of Orario has spread far and wide around the world.

More adventurers call Orario home than any other city or country. The Dungeon is where all of the ancestors of monsters scattered around the world were born. Many people refer to the Dungeon as one of the world’s three great mysteries. A colossal “unknown” sleeps within the deepest part of the Dungeon. This “unknown” draws many fearless adventurers into its depths.

Of course, most of these adventurers are motivated by greed. A place that spawns infinite monsters and drop items provides an infinite source of wealth. For those adventurers on a quest for glory, slaying particularly violent and dangerous beasts is the fastest way to become immortalized as a hero in tales of adventure. Orario was given the name “Labyrinth City” on a whim by the gods who lived there. They thought it made the city sound more interesting. Soon, Orario became known far and wide. Adventurers had nothing to do with it.

The excitement of the “unknown,” the lure of wealth, a chance to attain glory and above all notoriety, draws in more and more people every year.

Among the newcomers, there may even be a few who come here merely for fun and a fated meeting.

“The most passionate city in the world.”

That is what it’s called.

“Ah! Look over there! It’s the head of the dirt-poor
Familia
, Takemikazuchi! Oii! Hey, ooii!!—heh-heh.”

“Ah! Isn’t that the guy who has so little money every year his face is caving in, Takemikazuchi? Oii! Hey, ooii!!—hee-hee-hee.”

“Quiet, you worthless deities!”

This was inevitable.

These were the gods and goddesses who came to Gekai looking for entertainment. They came to the passionate city Orario seeking the “unknown” even more than the adventurers. That was them to a
T
.

They were gathering in a specific part of the city.

Gods didn’t normally get together in such high numbers.

“Yo!”

“Eeeeh! Long time! How long has it been?”

“’Bout four hundred years, I reckon.”

“Ohoh! That long? You’ve changed quiet a lot since then!”

“Sorry to change the subject on you, but is the Celebration really here?”

One overly extravagant building stood over the group of overly extravagant gods assembling in the street.

Standing among the lights of Orario, this thing was just plain weird. It was so out of place, it was almost mysterious.

The building was a massive, thirty-meter, human-shaped statue with an elephant’s head sitting cross-legged in the middle of the city block. The base of the building was surrounded by a stone wall.

The statue sat proudly, puffing out its chest. It was famous for inspiring a sense of wonder and uneasiness within anyone who saw it. Magic stone lamps lit up the statue from many angles. The elephant stood out against the black night sky.

It might have come as no surprise, but this building had a history.

It was built by the handsome, dark-skinned god Ganesha. Who
knew what he was thinking when he burned through his
Familia
’s savings to build this monstrosity.

This statue, Aiam Ganesha, was the home base of
Ganesha Familia
.

Even the members of his
Familia
didn’t like it. Most of them teared up a bit as they went in and out, thinking how their hard work had gone into paying for this thing. The icing on the cake? The entrance to the building was in the crotch of the statue.

“What’s Ganesha doing?”

“Ganesha really goes all out!”

The group of extraordinarily lavish people filed into the building through the crotch, laughing all the way.

Every one of these “people” was a god or goddess.

They had come for Ganesha’s “Celebration of the Gods.”

A Celebration of the Gods was basically a large party put on by a god for other gods living on Gekai. There were no rules about who hosted and who attended. The Celebration was hosted by a god who wanted to throw a party and was attended by gods who wanted to come. It was all done on a whim.

“Everyone! Thank you for coming today! I am Ganesha! I am overjoyed at the attendance of this Celebration! I love you all! I do have one small announcement to make: The yearly festival put on by my
Familia
is only three days away! Please encourage your
Familias
to attend!”

The great hall was only lightly decorated, completely different from the lavish exterior of the building.

Ganesha, wearing an elephant mask and dressed to match his statue, greeted his guests in a booming voice from the top of a stage in the middle of the hall. The gods in attendance by and large ignored his greeting and continued talking among themselves.

The party was set up to be a standing buffet. Tables with white tablecloths lined the great hall. An array of fresh food filled the hall with a variety of mouthwatering smells. Soft echoes from the shoes of both the attendees and the staff thumped from all directions.
A band sat behind the stage, waiting for the signal to play dance music.

Almost all of the deities in Orario were in attendance tonight.

Invitations to the Celebration had been disturbed by the host’s
Familia
. The number of guests was determined by their resources.

Ganesha Familia
was very prominent in Orario, so he was able to send an invitation to every single god and goddess within the city wall.

Hestia included.

“Hey! Mr. Waiter! Bring me a stool! Quickly!

“Y-yes!”

Hestia was busy raiding the food tables under the din of conversing gods when she summoned a member of
Ganesha Familia
.

She was not tall enough to reach a particularly delicious-looking dish in the middle of a table.

Mine! Mine! Mine!

“……”

Her arms flew around from dish to dish as she gathered as much food as she could onto her plate.

Unable to say anything, the waiter just watched her in action.

Hestia had no plans of slowing down—it was a buffet, and she was going to take full advantage of it.
Hestia Familia
was among the poorest of the poor
Familias
. She was most likely the bottom of the barrel of all the gods in attendance. But Hestia didn’t mind. She had no problem working so that Bell had enough energy to work in the Dungeon. Working in shops and doing odd jobs was just part of her life now.

However, she was the only deity there not wearing extravagant clothing. She was wearing her usual garb but had tried her best to make her clothes look more formal. It didn’t fool anyone.

“Hey, isn’t that Loli Big Boobs?”

“Wow, she’s still alive?”

“I’ve seen her. She’s working part-time in the northern south block. The children were patting her head.”

“That’s our Loli Lady!”

Of course, Hestia stuck out like a sore thumb. Shoveling food into her mouth and wearing ordinary clothes, she attracted a lot of attention.

Hestia knew they were making fun of her, but she decided to ignore everything and keep her mouth shut. At least until she found more good food.

“Just what do you think you’re doing…?”

“… mmhnngg… mm!”

A very tired voice hit her from the side.

Spinning around with a mouthful of pastries, Hestia saw a goddess with flaming red hair and wearing a dark crimson dress standing next to her.