Authors: A Difficult Woman
Luke would be pleased to know Matt was starting to appreciate the place, but staying in this town was not an option, no matter how much he liked it. Even if a deputy job did open up and he did manage to land it, and even if it would please Luke to no end to have someone around to talk to and take care of. He had a job to do in Reno. He was not going to walk away under a cloud and leave yet another dark Connors legacy in the Reno PD.
He filled a glass of water from the tap and then leaned back against the counter as he drank it. He glanced at Steve’s casserole.
Where was that stupid cat? Other cats may go places at night, but this one tended to stay at home waiting for him. He’d at least check the street, make certain the animal hadn’t been injured.
Matt looked out his front door. No cat. He ambled outside and down the street. He wasn’t going to call the cat. He turned around after two blocks, figuring fat boy wouldn’t make it much farther and started back. That’s when he saw it sitting under the window of a neighbor’s house, and sure enough, there was a classy-looking Siamese staring back at him through the screened window.
“Good taste, buddy,” Matt muttered. “If you’d lose some weight, you’d be able to jump up on that windowsill and do some real courting.” The cat blinked at him and then turned back to the feline Juliet in the balcony above.
Man, he was getting soft,
Matt thought as he walked back, enjoying the quiet night.
Worried about a cat.
He had a lot bigger issues to be worrying about than some stupid animal.
He went in and headed for bed, halfway wishing Tara could be in it with him. She had felt so damned good pressed up against him while they danced….
The woman did seem to be developing an awesome hold on him and he was still trying to figure out how it had happened. He’d had no intention of going to the bar that night after work. He’d planned on an early evening, but he had been drawn to Tara, had felt the need to make peace with her after his poor behavior. He hadn’t intended to play pool or dance, but he had lingered because of Tara, because he wanted to be near her.
Stubborn Tara with her invisible scars and protective barriers. Tara, who claimed she’d be happy with a one-night stand. He had a strong feeling that he’d need more than that—if he ever did sleep with Tara—and since he realized and accepted that, he knew it would be best if he simply kept his distance and left on cue. Easier on everyone. No pain. No regrets. He wouldn’t have to watch Tara eventually leave because his life was screwed up and he couldn’t help focusing on the job instead of the relationship.
His brain had it all figured out. Too bad the rest of him wasn’t listening.
I
T WAS JUST AFTER
midnight when Tara climbed to the third floor and flicked on the overhead light. The bathrooms had walls and Matt had replaced some of the old plaster with Sheetrock. It was a good start, but there was still a long way to go before she could paint and Hailey could stencil.
Tara debated for a moment and then went down to her room and changed into her work clothes. The sooner the seams were finished, the sooner she could paint. The clock was ticking and she wanted the upstairs to be as perfect as it could be for her first and possibly most important customers.
It wasn’t long until Tara discovered there was a knack to taping seams and feathering joint putty. It was definitely not as easy as it looked in the
Time-Life Home Improvement
series.
It was nearly three o’clock when a frustrated and exhausted Tara finally went downstairs, flicking lights off as she went, and she wasn’t all that happy with the results of her efforts. She would try again in the morning.
The doors were all locked, the shades drawn. She flopped down onto the sofa to take off her shoes and that was the last thing she remembered until a knock on the kitchen door brought her up out of a crushingly heavy slumber.
She frowned at the second knock and glanced around, disoriented by the light streaming in around the edges of the shades and the fact that she was still fully dressed. By the third knock she sat bolt upright, finally putting the pieces together. She had fallen asleep fully clothed on the sofa and now either Matt or Luke was there, ready to go to work. She pushed the shade aside and glanced outside. Matt. Of course.
“I don’t have breakfast ready yet,” she said as she pulled the kitchen door open a few seconds later. “But—” she stifled a yawn, avoiding looking at his face, hoping to keep him from looking too closely at her bedraggled appearance “—if you want to get started, I’ll call you when the coffee’s done.”
“All right.”
To her relief, Matt refrained from comment and headed through the kitchen to the stairs. Tara waited until he was out of sight and then leaned both hands on the counter, letting her head hang. She stayed in that position for several seconds and then drew in a deep, determined breath and pushed herself upright. Three hours of sleep were plenty.
One, two, three…she began counting scoops into the coffeepot. She could hear Matt’s progression up the old stairs, and then the noise stopped dead.
A few seconds later he was downstairs again, annoyance etched on his features.
“I was going to be polite. I wasn’t going to mention the fact that you looked like you slept in your clothes, but—” his lips pressed together into a flat line before he went on “—this is stupid, Tara. Did you sleep at all last night?”
“Yes,” Tara said in what was supposed to sound indignant, but came out more like a yawn.
“Look, it’s not my business if you kill yourself, but this is crazy. And besides that, those seams are awful.”
“Matt,” she said wearily, “I would really appreciate it if you would just go back upstairs and go to work.”
He cocked his head at an angle, looked at her from under hooded lids. “I will if you go to bed for a while.”
“No.”
He muttered an exasperated expletive.
“I have to get this house done plus I have another stupid committee meeting today. I lost time working for Jack. I was just trying to make up for it.”
“Hire more help.”
“I can’t afford more help. You and Luke are it.”
“Then don’t pay me. Hell, don’t pay Luke, either. Neither of us need it. Use the money to hire a couple more warm bodies—just for a few days.”
“I don’t work that way.”
“No, it’s a lot more sensible to work yourself into exhaustion and pay two guys who don’t need the money.”
Tara bit back a retort. “Can the three of us finish this place in time, even with my committee meetings?”
Matt hesitated and then said, “Probably.” In Tara’s mind that was a stubborn man’s way of saying yes. “Barring any unforeseen delays,” he added.
“Fine,” she said. “Then if you wanted to get a start, I’ll call you when the coffee is done.”
He didn’t move. She shook her head and turned back to the coffee machine, pouring in the water and flipping the switch. Her fingers had barely left the mechanism when she felt Matt move close behind her and every nerve in her body went on high alert. She clenched her teeth and turned in the small space. She met his eyes inquiringly, doing a pretty good job of faking disinterest. Pretty good. Not good enough.
“Tara,” Matt murmured. His hands hovered for an indecisive moment near her face and then he gently brushed back the wisps of hair that had escaped from her braid while she slept. Her entire body seemed to respond to the feathery touch. “Sometimes you can let people do things for you. Sometimes people need to do things without recompense. Do
you
ever give without expecting to get something in return?”
Tara opened her mouth, and then closed it again.
Yeah. I offered myself the other night, no strings attached. You passed.
“Of course,” she finally muttered.
“It works two ways. Everybody needs to give now and then. Sometimes you should let them.”
“I’ll keep that in mind,” Tara said. “But in the meantime, I’m paying you and Luke.”
“Just because someone gives you something, it doesn’t mean you owe them,” Matt snapped.
“I don’t see you accepting a lot of help,” she replied. “And I know you’re dealing with something. Maybe I could help you.”
Tara was saved from having to deal with his reply when the phone rang.
Nicky didn’t even bother to say hello.
“Why didn’t you tell me about this balloon payment on the house?” he demanded so loudly, Tara was certain Matt could clearly hear him. Her heart stuttered at her brother’s uncharacteristically angry tone.
“Nicky—”
“The house is half mine, right? I have a right to know these things.” Her brother was steamed.
“Yes, you do,” Tara agreed, rapidly preparing a knee-jerk defense of her reasonable actions. He was her little brother. He hadn’t even been legal when they inherited. Of course she had handled things. As for not telling him—
“Then why didn’t you tell me?”
“I wanted you to concentrate on school, not finances. You don’t need to worry about this.” Tara walked into the parlor as she spoke, not wanting Matt to hear her argue with her brother.
“That’s not the impression I got,” her brother barked.
“Who gave you this impression?”
“I applied for a bank loan to help with school and found out that I not only had half a house, I had half a huge debt. Do we have enough money to pay this?”
“I’ll figure something out.”
Nicky was silent for a moment and then said more calmly, “If we use Aunt Laura’s life insurance money for school, then you won’t be able to make this payment, will you? We might lose the house.”
We.
She wasn’t the only one who would lose. Nicky would lose, too. But at least he would have his education.
“I’m working on refinancing.” Not very successfully, but she was working on it.
There was another long silence before Nicky said in a tight un-Nickylike voice, “T, I’m not twelve years old anymore. You can stop trying to protect me from reality, you know. I don’t need protecting and, frankly, you’ve got to stop. It’s not healthy for either of us.”
But she’d always been the boss, the protector. The one who kept Nicky safe.
“Look, we’ll talk finances when I get back in a few days,” he said. “I need to know what’s going on. I need to be part of the decision-making process.”
“All right,” Tara agreed in a low voice.
“All right.” There was a pause and then he added, “I love you, T. I’ll see you in a few.”
The line clicked dead and Tara stood for a moment holding the receiver before she returned to the kitchen and put it back in the cradle.
“Is everything all right?”
Tara turned to Matt. “Everything is fine.”
A corner of his mouth tightened. “You don’t need any help with anything?” he asked ironically.
Tara shook her head. “Nope.”
“Good. Neither do I.”
T
HE PROM-DRESS
staging committee meeting was cancelled at the last minute because Dottie was under the weather, but Tara still had errands, so she drove into town and kept her luncheon date with Hailey in order to discuss the final stencil selection and supplies. She’d reluctantly made arrangements to pick Hailey up at the Hair Affaire after being assured it would be safe.
“None of the dragons will be there.”
Hailey had been wrong. Well, not completely wrong. Tara had always thought of Sandra Hernandez as a witch, more of a dragon associate, but she bit the bullet and smiled at the woman, who gritted her teeth and smiled back.
“Very civilized,” Hailey whispered in Tara’s ear as she came up behind her. “Now, let’s go get one of those jumbo burger things before I starve to death.”
A jumbo burger was just what Tara needed, even if she only managed to plow through half of it in the time it took Hailey to clean up her entire plastic basket. Hailey grinned unapologetically as she dabbed at her mouth with a napkin. “Good metabolism,” she said. “Grandma says it will catch up with me.”
“Doesn’t seem to have so far.”
“I’ve gained weight,” Hailey confided. “But that’s a good thing. I lost a lot during the past few years.” She shrugged. “Stress does bad things to your body.”
“I know,” Tara agreed after another bite.
“Yeah, I guess so. If you’re interested, I think your stock is rising with the local ladies. The other day someone was trying to figure out what anyone had against you, other than your family.” Hailey grinned. “That’s when I found out that you used to be pretty handy with your fists.”
“Not for a while,” Tara retorted dryly as she dragged a fry through the ketchup. “These people have long memories.”
“What about Ryan?”
Tara’s eyes flashed up in spite of herself. “What about him?”
Hailey must’ve realized she had touched a nerve. She shrugged. “Rumor. Of course. Something about him filing a restraining order against you. Nobody knows the details.”
“There’s a good reason for that,” Tara muttered. “I don’t talk about it. Don’t even like to think about it.”
“I know what you mean.”
And there was something in Hailey’s quiet tone that made Tara believe she did.
“One bad experience shouldn’t ruin a person for life, but you know what?” Hailey’s mouth twisted ruefully. “No matter how many times I tell myself that, I’m still gun-shy. I like to date, but it will be a long,
long
time before I’m ready to commit again. Maybe never.” She reached for one of Tara’s fries. “I’ll have to wait and see.”
“So you just…date? With no intention of it ever developing any further?”
Hmm. That sounded mighty familiar.
“I like company. I like fun. I’ll be a friend.
But…
”
“But…?” Tara echoed. This was the closest she’d ever gotten to girl talk and it was good to get input from another female, especially when it was so close to her own way of thinking.
“But, my stomach churns when I think of letting it go any further, emotionally, you know. I don’t think I will ever give anyone the power to hurt me again.”