Junie B. Jones Is (almost) a Flower Girl (2 page)

“Sometimes grown-up ladies enjoy
making a bubble beard,” I explained very serious.

After that, I covered my whole entire self with bubbles.

“Hey! It is very fluffery in here!” I said real happy.

Mother laughed.

“You look like a bride in a long white veil,” she said.

Then, all of a sudden, her whole entire mouth came open.

“Oh my gosh! I almost forgot to tell you the good news, didn’t I?” she said. “Your Aunt Flo called today! And she said she’s getting
married!
”

Mother clapped her hands together.

“Aunt Flo, Junie B.! Aunt Flo is getting married! Isn’t that
exciting?
You’re going to go to your very first wedding!”

After that, Mother smiled real big.

And she hummed a pretty bride song.

And she danced with my towel.

And so guess what?

Getting married must be a very big deal.

The next day at recess, I sang the pretty bride song.

I sang it to my bestest friends named Lucille and that Grace.

“HERE COMES THE BRIDE…

ALL DRESSED AND WIDE…

HER NAME IS CLYDE,

AND SHE READS
TV GUIDE.”

That Grace looked admiring at me.

“Wow. I never even knew that song had words,” she said.

“Of course it has words, silly. Every song has words,” I said. “All you have to do is make them up.”

After that, I skipped all around those two. And I sang the song some more.

“Guess why I’m singing this bride song?” I asked. “Guess, people! Guess! Guess! Guess!”

I couldn’t wait for them to guess.

“’CAUSE I’M GOING TO MY FIRST WEDDING EVER! ON ACCOUNT OF MY AUNT FLO IS GETTING MARRIED! THAT’S WHY!”

Lucille clapped her hands real delighted.

“A wedding! A wedding! I
love
weddings, Junie B.! Are you going to be the flower girl? Huh? Are you? Are you?”

I wrinkled my eyebrows.

“The what?” I asked. “The who?”

“The flower girl! The flower girl!” said Lucille. “The flower girl is the very first person to walk down the aisle at the wedding! She gets to carry a flower basket. And she throws beauteous flower petals all over the floor.”

“It’s really fun, too, Junie B.!” said
Grace. “I was the flower girl at my Aunt Lola’s wedding. And I got to wear a long satin dress! And I only tripped two times!”

Lucille fluffed her fluffy hair.

“Yes, well,
I’ve
been the flower girl in
three
weddings. Grace,” she said. “And I’ve worn
three
long satin dresses. And all of them had matching purses and shoes and hats. Plus one of them had a blue fake bunny fur cape. And I
never
tripped at all. So that makes me the best flower girl, probably.”

Grace’s face drooped a teeny bit.

“Oh,” she said kind of soft.

After that, Lucille asked me a million more questions.

“What kind of flower girl dress are you going to wear, Junie B.? Huh? Is it going to be long or short? What color will it be, do
you think? So far I have worn yellow and pink and blue.”

She tapped on her chin.

“Hmm. I wonder what kind of flower petals you will carry in your flower basket? Tell your Aunt Flo that I prefer rose petals.”

All of a sudden, Lucille did a gasp.

“Junie B.! Junie B.! I just thought of something! Maybe Grace and I can
teach
you! We can teach you how to walk down the aisle and carry the basket! Want us to? Huh? Want us to teach you?”

I jumped up and down.

“Yes!” I said. “Of course I want you to, Lucille!”

After that, Grace cheered up very much. Then all of us did a high five.

And we skipped in a happy circle.

And we practiced being flower girls.

I skipped home from my bus stop very thrilled. ’Cause I had good news, of course!

My grampa Miller was babysitting baby Ollie. They were playing on the floor together.

I runned and jumped on the couch.

“GRAMPA MILLER! HEY, GRAMPA MILLER! LISTEN TO MY GOOD NEWS! I’M GOING TO BE THE FLOWER GIRL AT AUNT FLO’S WEDDING! AND SO WHAT DO YOU THINK OF THAT, SIR?”

Grampa Miller stopped playing with Ollie.

He did a funny look at me.

“What?” he said. “Are you
sure
about that, toots?”

“Sure I’m sure! Of course I’m sure!” I said. “’Cause me and my friends decided it at school today! And now all I need to do is tell Aunt Flo!”

I zoomed to the kitchen and got my mother’s address book.

Then I zoomed right back to my grampa.

“Here, Grampa Miller! Tell me Aunt Flo’s phone number. I need to call her right this very minute!”

Grampa Miller scratched his head.

“Gee, I don’t know, honey,” he said. “This doesn’t sound like a good idea to me. What if Aunt Flo has already made
arrangements for a flower girl?”

I laughed out loud at that silly man.

“Yeah, only how could she already make arrangements for a flower girl, when she doesn’t even know it’s me yet?”

Grampa Miller covered his face with his hands. He did a groan back there, I think.

I pulled on his sleeve.

“Come on, Grampa! Look up the number! Please? Please? Please?” I begged.

Finally, Grampa shaked his head no.

“You really need to wait and discuss this with your mother,” he said.

I did a huffy breath at that guy.

’Cause Mother would not be home for an hour, probably! And who could wait
that
long?

That’s how come I quick hided the address book under my arm. And I tippytoed
down the hall to Mother’s room.

Then I closed her door very secret. And I climbed up on her bed.

After that, I opened up the address book to the page with the M’s. ’Cause Aunt Flos last name is Miller! Just like my grampa’s!

And what do you know!

I spied it right away!

“F-L-O,” I spelled real thrilled. “F-L-O SPELLS FLO!”

And here’s another good thing! Aunt Flo’s phone number was right next to her name!

“Hey! This project was easy as cake!” I said.

After that, I dialed the number speedy quick.

It ringed and ringed.

“Hello?” said a voice.

I did a gasp.

“HEY! WHAT DO YOU KNOW! I DID IT, AUNT FLO! I CALLED YOU RIGHT ON THE TELEPHONE!”

Aunt Flo’s voice sounded curious.

“Junie B.?” she said. “Is that
you?”

“YES! YES! IT’S ME, AUNT FLO! IT’S JUNIE B. JONES! AND I’VE GOT THE BESTEST SURPRISE YOU EVER HEARD OF!”

Then, all of a sudden, the surprise popped right out of my mouth.

“I’M GOING TO BE THE FLOWER GIRL AT YOUR WEDDING, AUNT FLO! AND SO THIS IS YOUR LUCKY DAY, MADAM!”

I runned all over the bed.

“Wait till you see me, Aunt Flo! I will be the bestest flower girl you ever saw! ’Cause
Lucille already showed me how to throw flower petals! And Grace showed me how not to trip!”

I kept on talking very excited.

“Mother thinks I’m a baby, Aunt Flo. But I’m not! I’m a grown-up lady! Wait till you see me! Just wait till you see me!”

Aunt Flo didn’t say any words.

I tapped on the receiver with my fingers.

“Aunt Flo? Aunt Flo? Where did you go?”

Finally, she talked again.

“Uh…yes, well…I’m here, Junie B.,” she said. “Its just that your news sort of caught me… off guard.”

I bounced on the bed some more.

“Hurray!” I said. “Hurray for off guard, right, Aunt Flo? ’Cause off guard is like a big surprise, right? And so what kind of
dress would you like me to wear? I think it should be long…all the way to the floor.”

I grinned real big. “And guess what else? Maybe I will also wear a blue fake bunny fur cape!”

Aunt Flo didn’t talk again.

I looked into the phone with my eyeball.

“Hmm. We musta got a bad connector here,” I said.

“Junie B., honey,” said Aunt Flo. “I’m afraid I have some bad news for you.”

Just then, I felt sickish in my stomach. ’Cause bad news is not that good, usually.

My voice got quieter.

“What
kind
, Aunt Flo?” I asked very nervous. “What
kind
of bad news?”

“Oh dear. I don’t really know how to tell you this, Junie B. But…well, Joe and I have already chosen a flower girl for the wedding,
honey. And, uh, I’m afraid it’s not you.”

I did a gulp.

“Who are you afraid it
is?
” I asked even quieter.

“It’s Bo,” said Aunt Flo.

“Bo?”

“Bo is Joe’s little sister,” said Aunt Flo.

“Joe?”

“Joe is the man I’m marrying,” said Aunt Flo. “Joe asked Bo.”

“Oh,” I whispered.

Just then, my eyes got tears in them.

“I gotta go,” I said.

After that, my nose started to run very much.

And I hanged up the phone.

The rest of the day was not that enjoyable.

I got in big trouble.

’Cause Aunt Flo tattletaled to Grampa

Miller. And Grampa Miller tattletaled to Daddy. And Daddy tattletaled to Mother.

And Mother made a big issue of it at dinner.

A big issue
is the grown-up word for Mother keeps yelling and yelling and she won’t let the matter drop.

“It was
wrong
, Junie B. Jones,” she said.
“It was
wrong
to disobey your grandfather. And it was
wrong
to invite yourself to be in Aunt Flo’s wedding.”

I sat up a little straighter.

“Flo,” I said kind of soft. “F-l-o spells Flo.”

Mother sucked in her cheeks.

“Yes…well, we’re all thrilled that you’re learning to spell. But this isn’t about spelling, Junie B. This is about disobeying your grandfather.”

I hanged my head way down.

“But I wanted to be a flower girl real bad,” I said. “I wanted to wear a long dress and show you I’m a grown-up lady.”

Mother did a frown. “I’m sorry, but that’s no excuse,” she said.

After that, I slumped way far over at the table. Only too bad for me. ’Cause my head
got too close to my plate. And my hair got gravy on it.

I stared and stared at my gravy hair.

“Today is not actually going that well,” I said to just myself.

Just then, the phone rang.

Mother answered it.

Oh no!

It was Aunt Flo!

And she wanted to talk to
me!

Mother handed me the phone.

I shook my head real fast.

“No, thank you. I don’t actually care to speak to her at this time,” I said.

But Mother kept on shoving the phone at me. And so I didn’t have a choice.

My insides felt shaky and nervous.

“H…h… hello?”

“Why, hello, yourself!” said Aunt Flo.

Her voice sounded jolly.

“I’m sorry about what happened today, Junie B.,” she said. “But I’ve got some good news for you. How would you like to be the
alternate
flower girl? Do you know what an alternate is?”

I shook my head no.

“An alternate is like a
substitute
, sort of,” she said. “Like if Bo gets sick and she can’t be in the wedding…
you
will step in and be the flower girl! Do you understand, honey?”

Just then, I felt a little bit happier inside.

“I do, Aunt Flo. I do understand,” I said.

“But wait,” said Aunt Flo. “I haven’t even told you the best part yet! Because even if Bo doesn’t get sick, we still want you to sit with the bridesmaids at the reception! How does that sound?”

My eyes got biggish and widish.

“Perfect! It sounds perfect!” I said real squealy.

I jumped down from my chair.

“Hey, Aunt Flo! This means I can still wear a long dress, right? And who knows? Maybe Bo will even give me a couple of flower petals for my very own!”

I kept on getting happier and happier.

“Thank you, Aunt Flo! Thank you for making me the alternate flower girl! ’Cause this day turned out happier than I thought!”