Kate Sherwood - Dark Horse 01 - Dark Horse (40 page)

As they’re walking back from the course, Dan tries to reassure him. “There’s always an element of risk, but Sunshine’s a really strong, sensible jumper, and there’s nothing out there that will challenge her even a little bit. She’ll take care of Tat.” Evan nods and looks a little better, but still not exactly calm. Dan can’t blame him. Eventing is a dangerous sport, and all the caution in the world can’t change that. And it’s one thing to take the risk yourself, quite another to see your beloved baby sister try it. Dan wonders if Evan’s going to make it through the weekend without losing his mind.

There’s a barbecue planned for that night for all the competitors and visitors, and people are starting to gather around now, but the crew decides to take a quick run over and get settled in their motel before coming back. That brings up the awkward division of rooms. They’d had only one room booked originally, for the three women to share. Dan had planned to stay on a cot in the tack stall, to be near the horses. Then Tatiana had gotten it into her head that it would be an adventure to stay on the site, but Dan had refused to let her stay alone, and hadn’t really thought it would be appropriate for him to stay with her, so Robyn had volunteered, and Dan had booked another room at the motel so he and Michelle could have separate rooms. When Evan had decided to come, Dan had thought that it wouldn’t really seem fair to book a separate room for him when he’d expected the three girls to all stay together in one. He’d asked Evan if he wanted his own space, and Evan had said he was fine with sharing, and it was up to Dan. So he hadn’t added a room, and now he’s sharing with Evan. He isn’t worried about Evan being aggressive or inappropriate, he’s relieved to find, but it’s just… awkward.

Tat and Robyn stay on the site, Tat taking her responsibility so seriously that she can barely be dragged away from the stalls to eat. Evan, Dan and Michelle dart over to the motel and check in, throw their bags into the rooms, and drive back to the eventing grounds.

By the time they get back, the barbecue is well under way. They head over toward the food line, and they’re just walking past a small group of people when a surprised voice says, “Dan?”

Dan turns, and Evan stays with him while Michelle goes to find Robyn and Tat. “Sean! Hey, how are you?” Sean had competed at the national level for years with his old ride, but Dan hadn’t heard much about him since the horse had retired.

“I’m good, good….” Sean’s suddenly looking a little awkward, and Dan knows what’s coming. “I was, uh, sorry to hear—”

Dan cuts him off. “Yeah, thanks.” Like most athletes involved in high-risk sports, eventers can be superstitious, and Dan knows that it seems like bad luck to refer to a fatal accident on the eve of a competition.

Sean looks surprised, and then grateful. “Okay, thanks, man.” He gets a little more animated. “So, what are you doing out here? You’re not competing, are you?”

“Yeah, kinda.” He twists around to bring Evan into the conversation. “Evan, this is Sean Dubois. We used to ride against him. And, Sean, this is Evan Kaminski. He’s brought the Archer horses out from Kentucky, and I’m training them for him now.”

Sean looks impressed. “Kaminski? Wow. I, uh….” He raises his eyebrows. eventing.” “I’d heard you were thinking about getting involved in

“Just starting up, actually. Dan’s showing us the ropes.” Sean nods. “Yeah, great, no one better.” He looks back at Dan. “So, what are you riding tomorrow?”

“Nothing serious—we’ve got a couple horses going
hors concours
, a couple just taking trial runs at beginner novice, and then one competitor at training level. How about you?”

“Uh, just one, at training.”

 

Dan nods, and then looks over to the food line. “Well, we’d better go if we want any food. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

Sean nods, and Dan and Evan move off. When they’re a safe distance away, Dan looks at Evan and says, “I’ll bet you twenty bucks he’s hitting you up for my rides by the end of the weekend.”

Evan frowns curiously, and Dan explains. “He’s a pro. Showing one horse at the training level—that’s not enough to keep him fed. He must be looking for work, and he won’t mind taking someone else’s ride if he has to.”

“Is that normal? I mean, to be that cutthroat? It sounded like you guys are friends.”

Dan shrugs. “It’s a business. Eventing is an expensive sport, and most of the people seriously involved are either rich”—he nods toward Evan—“or doing whatever they can to earn rides, just trying to have another season with the horses.” He nods down toward himself and then adds, “Sean’s not rich.”

Evan looks a little incredulous. “But you don’t do that… you don’t act like that.”

Dan shrugs. “I’ve got a sweetheart deal. I mean, I’m a kept man, to some extent.” He glances at Evan’s raised eyebrows and shakes his head with a little smile. “Not that way. I just mean most trainers are running their own barns, responsible for their own bills, and if they don’t do well, if they don’t produce winners, their business shuts down.” They’ve arrived at the line now, and Dan turns to face Evan directly. “I don’t mean that there’s no burden on me to get the horses to perform, but you’ve got realistic, long-term expectations, and you’ve got the finances to give us a cushion. I don’t hustle like that because I don’t have to, but if I had to… I don’t know. I know I want to keep riding.”

Evan frowns. “It’s—I mean, it’s just a game to me, even to Tat….” Dan nods and smiles again. “Yeah. I know. I think there’s a lot of things I take seriously that are just a game to you.”

Evan frowns, and looks a little hurt, and Dan shakes his head. “I didn’t mean… I didn’t mean personal stuff. I meant… I don’t know, like that fish.” It’s strangely important to Dan that he make Evan understand this. “I’m not saying you shouldn’t have fun, I’m not being critical of it, but… how much money are you talking about there? I mean, if you’re looking at the whole quarterly profit of a company your size—you’re talking about millions of dollars, right?”

Evan nods cautiously.

“So you’d think that making millions of dollars would be a pretty big rush, but you’ve got so much money that it doesn’t even matter to you anymore. I mean, if I made… I don’t even want to know, but let’s say, what, a hundred million? In three months?” Evan shrugs his acceptance of that estimate, and Dan can’t help but be a little shocked. He’d known the Kaminskis were loaded, but… wow. He tries to get back on topic, and explains, “If I made a tenth of that, it would change my life entirely. But for you, the money doesn’t really matter, so you turn it into a game. You play with a bunch of numbers and take bets on a damn stuffed fish.”

Evan looks thoughtful, and maybe a little sad. Dan tries to make it better. “I don’t mean it as a criticism, man. It’s just the way things are. It’s different for you.”

Evan nods a little. “Yeah, no… I get it. I was just…. Jeff used to talk the same way…. I was just wondering why he doesn’t anymore.” Evan’s eyes lock with Dan’s, fiercely intent. “Because I appreciate you saying it, I do. I mean, it’s easy for me to just waltz around and ignore that stuff, and it would be easier for you to just dismiss me as some spoiled brat, and not bother trying to explain.” He takes a deep breath, and then lets it out. “I wonder if Jeff has given up on making me understand.”

Dan doesn’t like the direction this conversation is taking. “Jeff loves you, man. I’m, like, the least perceptive person in the world, and I can see that.”

Evan nods. “Yeah. But….” Evan doesn’t finish the sentence, but he doesn’t have to. The “what if that isn’t enough” is clear on his face, even to Dan.

“Hell, maybe he doesn’t talk about it anymore because
he’s
gotten spoiled, too, you ever think of that?” Dan grins. “He seems pretty damn comfortable walking around your place and inviting his friends over for barbecues, and drinking the fancy wines and whatever. Maybe he doesn’t bug you about it because he doesn’t figure he’s got the right!”

Evan grins a little, and then sounds like he’s trying to stick up for Jeff. “He’s really careful about paying his own way. I mean, anything necessary, he takes care of himself.”

“Yeah, but he’s happy to enjoy your luxuries, isn’t he?” Dan raises his hands. “I’m not saying I blame him either. You guys are together. You don’t mind sharing… great, why not? I don’t think it’s hurting anyone. But, lifestyle-wise—he’s a have, not a have-not.”

They’re at the food service table now, and there’s a pause as they load up on burgers and side dishes. They see the girls at a picnic table and start toward them, but before they arrive, Evan asks, “So how would it change your life? If you made ten million dollars?”

Dan grins a little at the idea, but then he stops walking and frowns as he thinks about it. “Shit,” he snorts. Evan looks at him in surprise, and Dan shakes his head before he starts speaking. “If I had ten million dollars, I’d ride eventers all day. I’d live in a nice house and keep the horses in a great facility, with private riding rings and a beautiful crosscountry course. I’d hire fun, talented people to work with… hell, I’d even have a hyper teenage barn rat running around to keep things interesting.” He looks at Evan a little sheepishly. “I dunno, man, maybe I was wrong. If I made ten million dollars right now, I’d probably just put it in the bank.”

Evan shakes his head. “Maybe you would, or maybe you’d take it and spend it on stupid stuff, and end up realizing that you were better off beforehand.” He shrugs. “I’m not saying life isn’t a lot easier when you have money, ’cause I know that it is. There’s times when it’s really, really useful. But… it’s not all there is, you know? And it can buy you some security, but it can’t protect you from everything.”

Evan looks down at his plate, and then off to the darkening horizon. “Tomorrow’s Father’s Day, and I was so
fucking
glad when I heard that Tat was going to be coming to this thing, because maybe it’ll distract her and keep her from falling apart the way she has every other year on Father’s Day, and Mother’s Day, and their birthdays.” He looks back at Dan. “And, I know, we have money so we can pay for the distractions, and we have money so I can afford to be here in case she
does
fall apart, and all that’s true, but it doesn’t change the fact that she lost both her parents when she was nine years old. Money can’t bring them back.” Evan isn’t crying, but his eyes are full.

Dan shakes his head. “No. It can’t bring anybody back.”

There’s a quiet moment, and then Tatiana’s voice cuts through the dusk. “Evan? Are you lost? Dan? Follow the sound of my voice! Don’t be afraid!”

Evan shakes his head. “Money can’t make it okay for me to muzzle her.”

 

“Maybe it could buy you a really, really good pair of earplugs.” “Evan? Do you need help? If you need help, bark like a seal!” The girl is clearly enjoying herself.

Evan shakes his head resignedly, and they walk the rest of the way to the table, where Evan carefully puts his plate down and then leans his head over Tat’s shoulder. “Aauurf, Aauurf,” he barks in her ear, and as Tatiana shrieks with laughter Dan reflects that it really is a very good seal imitation. Maybe rich kids get special tutoring in animal voices.

The rest of the meal goes smoothly, and shortly after they’re done eating, Robyn and Tat go down for a final check on the horses, and the other three head back to the motel. Evan takes first turn in the bathroom, and when Dan comes out the lights are turned off, but there’s enough light filtering in through the window that Dan can make his way to his bed. He climbs in and lies there staring at the ceiling, listening to Evan breathe in the bed next to him. After a few minutes, Evan stirs.

“Dan?”
“Yeah?”
“Dan, sing me a lullaby,” Evan whines.
“Go fuck yourself, Evan.”
Evan snorts. “Well, since
you
won’t….”

Dan doesn’t respond to that, but a few minutes later he says, “Evan?”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Are you still… I mean, okay, I wasn’t loving the aggressive comeons, but are you still… thinking in those terms?”

 

Evan shifts, and in the dim light Dan can see that he’s turned on his side and facing him. “Yeah, but….”

 

Dan braces himself. “But….”

“But I want to do it right, now. You know? I want to do it like you said. I want us to keep doing this, getting to know each other, and hanging out, and… being sure.” He shakes his head. “I know it sounds like I’m a little girl, but I want to take it slow.”

Dan absorbs that information. “So, if I got up right now and climbed into bed with you, you’d turn me away?” He puts enough teasing in his voice to let Evan know that it’s not going to happen.

Evan responds in a similar tone. “I don’t know—why don’t you give it a try?”

They both laugh a little, and then it’s quiet again. Dan looks at the ceiling, and the way the lights from passing cars reflect off the panels. “Evan?”
“Yeah.”
“I’m sorry about your parents, man.”
Evan lets out a deep breath. “Yeah.”

They stop talking then, and Dan feels his body relaxing. He thinks briefly about how he didn’t spend the night with Ryan, and how he now
is
spending the night with Evan. He thinks it should seem backward and unnatural, but somehow, it doesn’t. Then he lets himself drift off to sleep, listening to the comforting sounds of Evan’s soft breathing in the background.

Chapter 32

T
HE
alarm the next morning is early even by Dan’s standards, and Evan just makes a strange groaning snort and buries his head under his pillow as Dan struggles upright and heads for the shower. He brings fresh underwear in with him to avoid the awkwardness of being totally naked in front of Evan, and even remembers to grab the white boxer briefs instead of his usual black. He sometimes can’t believe that he has a job where he has to worry about his underwear showing through his white pants.

He showers and shaves, and then heads back out to the main room. He finds his dress breeches and pulls them on, and is just hunting around for the silk socks that work best under his dress boots when Evan sits up with a groan. “What time is it, man?”

Dan checks his watch. “Half past five. We need to be out of here in half an hour—I’ve got cereal, and there’s milk and fruit in the mini-fridge, but if you want to go to the diner for breakfast you’d better haul ass.”