Keep No Secrets (47 page)

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means when the trial is over, you and I need to figure out the best way to do this without hurting the kids more than we already have. I guess if I'm convicted, it'll be figured out for us. If not . . . " He shrugs. "I don't know."

"What's
this
, Jack?"

He sighs. "Claire . . ." Is he suggesting they split up? "I don't know. I don't know."

A wave of tears swells in her eyes. He forces himself to look, to acknowledge the pain he's causing her. But he's still so angry at what she did and that she hasn't even begun to accept responsibility for it.

The words "I'm sorry" haven't crossed her lips.

She plants her hands on her hips. "I guess it's easier when there's someone waiting in the wings, isn't it? Well, let me ask you this: What happens when you wake up one day and realize life's not perfect with her, either?"

"What are you talking about? What
life
with her?"

But it's as if she didn't even hear the question. She's made her assumptions and she won't hear otherwise. "What happens when the attraction wears off? Because it will. When the things you think are so
sexy and charming
are outweighed by the things you find irritating? When you see her at her worst, when she's angry about something but taking it out on you because you're the nearest target? Or when she's angry at
you
because it's your day to see the kids but she has other plans for you and you tell her, sorry, my kids come first. Or will you trade them in, too?"

"Stop it. You sound ridiculous."

"It's easy to think so highly of her, isn't it, when she's not the one who yells at the kids, when she's not the one who's crabby when she gets home from work because she knows she still has to cook dinner, and clean the house, and do the laundry

—" She suddenly spots the supplies on the shelf above the washing machine. She yanks at a box of fabric softener sheets and flings it at him. He dodges and the box grazes his shoulder and falls forgotten to the floor. "You wait and see how attracted to her you are when she's doing load after load of your stinking laundry! You wait. What happens when all of a sudden another woman looks good to you and you can't figure out why? When,
once again
, you can't keep it in your pants? You think she'll react differently than I have? You think she won't care when you cheat on
her
?"

He reaches for her arm above the

elbow, tries to pull her close. "Claire, don't do this."

"Let
go
!" She wriggles to pull away, but he locks his arms around her and holds tight.

"Don't do this to yourself. It's about us, not her."

She attempts to push against his chest but can't get leverage. "Of
course
it's about her!"

"No, not in the way you're thinking. If she evaporated into air tomorrow, we'd still be having this conversation. You know that."

"No I don't."

"Yes. You do."

And like a defenseless animal making a last ditch effort to ward off a ring of predators, she makes a guttural noise, part scream, part growl, and tries to break free.

He tightens his grip, and she finally surrenders with a small cry, and then crumbles, sobbing, into his arms.

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

A SOFT GASP rises from the gallery when Walker calls Claire to the stand on Monday morning. Jack forces himself to watch as she enters with the bailiff through the rear doors and walks

purposefully up the center aisle. He forces himself to watch her climb the single step into the witness box, all the while trying to maintain a look that says he's perfectly okay with his wife testifying as a witness for the prosecution.

Once Claire takes her seat on the stand, she surprises Jack by meeting his eye. On Saturday, after she extricated herself from his embrace, she left the house and stayed away the rest of the weekend. He assumed she went to her parents' house, but just like her assumption that he'd gone to Jenny, he could have been entirely wrong. Once she pulled out of the drive, Jack went in search of his sons. Jamie, thankfully, was nowhere to be found; Jack learned later he'd gone downtown with Billy's family to the Soulard Farmer's Market. He found Michael upstairs in his bedroom.

As soon as Jack saw his son's vacant eyes, he knew Michael had heard the fighting, if not the specific words exchanged.

Now, Claire looks away from him only when the bailiff asks her to raise her right hand for the oath. She answers so quietly, he has to ask her to repeat her

affirmation.

The judge nods to Walker that he may proceed.

"Can you state your name for the record?"

She turns to the jury for her response.

"Claire Hilliard."

"You're married to the defendant in this case, Jack Hilliard?"

"Yes."

"How long have you been married?"

"Almost eighteen years."

"Do you consider your marriage a happy one?"

Claire blinks slowly.
You're an asshole,
Walker
, her look says. She knows, of course, that Walker considers her an adverse witness even though he's the one who subpoenaed her. Even so, they all thought he’d pretend otherwise for the benefit of the jury.

Jack glances at the jury box; all twelve faces are aimed at Claire, anxious for her answer. He hears whispers and titters from the gallery. They've been trained by the media to rally for the wife, to cheer when she leaves the scoundrel, and to shake their heads in disbelief, even sometimes disgust, when she stands by his side. For four years they've hungered for the answer to this question and many more like it, yet Claire always refused to take her private life public. Now, thanks to a sixteen-year-old girl, that choice has been taken away from her.

"Like most marriages, we've had our ups and downs, but overall, yes, I've considered it a happy one."

Jack closes his eyes. She walked right into Walker's trap.

"What types of ups and downs?"

Earl draws a large question mark on his legal pad, meaning
Want me to object?

Jack shakes his head. The judge made it clear during pretrial motions that he'd allow questioning about Jack's past with Jenny, and since they touched on it already during Michael's testimony, it'd be useless to object now. If it has to be discussed, Jack can't think of anyone more capable of handling the topic than Claire. By the time she finishes, Walker will regret asking the question.

"My husband had a brief affair, Mr.

Walker. He was genuinely repentant and asked for my forgiveness. I gave it to him."

Walker stills. In the same way Claire thought Walker would allow her to warm up before firing off the uncomfortable questions, he most likely expected Claire to dance around the issue and was prepared to ask follow-up questions to pin her down. Now that she has given him such a blunt answer, he has to jump forward in his questioning.

"Most wives wouldn't be so

magnanimous."

Claire remains silent, and Jack smiles slightly, pleased that she noticed Walker didn't ask a question. Walker continues when he realizes she won't be easily riled.

"With whom did he have this 'brief affair'?"

"A woman named Jennifer Dodson. A fellow lawyer."

Walker retrieves something from a folder on his table and crosses over to show it to Earl. It's an 8 x 10 color photo of Jenny, one of the shots used by the media four years ago. Earl nods, and Walker approaches Claire. She glances at Jack before looking down at the photo.

Despite her best efforts to maintain a neutral face, Jack sees she's shaken. Her hand trembles as she holds the photo.

Jenny might have been an ever-present force in both Jack and Claire's lives for a long time, but for Claire, once Jenny left town, and even after her return, she was merely an intangible idea, a concept. The other woman. "Jenny" was merely the label attached to the concept. Now, the photo forces Claire to acknowledge the actual woman.

"Is that Jennifer Dodson in the photo?"

"Yes." Claire hands the photo back to Walker as if it's covered in germs.

Walker motions to the jury and says,

"May I, Your Honor?" With the judge's permission he hands it to the juror at the front, left end of the box. One by one, each jury looks and then passes it on. A few of the braver ones study Jack afterward.

"When did Mr. Hilliard have this brief affair?" Walker asks the question as he retrieves the photo from the last juror.

He smiles and nods at the juror as if they're the best of friends.

"About four and a half years ago, just after his first election as DA."

"Am I correct that shortly after his affair with Ms. Dodson, authorities charged her with the murder of a client, but the charge was subsequently dropped after the DA admitted to being with her on the night of the murder? Indeed, he
spent
the night with her, thus providing an alibi?"

"Yes, you're correct."

"And it's believed that shortly thereafter, Ms. Dodson left St. Louis?"

"Yes, many believe that."

"Do you?"

"Yes."

Earl rises calmly. "Objection. I'm losing sight of the relevancy of this line of questioning."

Judge Simmons looks at Walker over the top of his glasses. "Mr. Walker?"

"Judge, I was hoping to lay a foundation for my later questions, but I'm happy to jump ahead to help Your Honor understand the relevancy now."

"Please do."

Earl returns to his seat, and Jack leans close to his ear. "Relevancy? Seriously?"

He was about to ask whether you'd been in
contact with J since
, Earl writes on the legal pad.

Jack sits back in his chair, stunned that he missed the obvious direction of Walker's questions. He wonders if Claire understood, and whether she would have perjured herself on the stand. There was a time when he thought he knew the

answer, but now he's not so sure.

Walker resumes his questions. "Mrs.

Hilliard, the victim in this case is the girlfriend of your son Michael, is that correct?

"The alleged victim, you mean? Yes, she is."

"I presume, therefore, you are quite familiar with her physical appearance?" he asks, glossing over her clarification.

"Yes, I am."

"Can you describe her?"

"She bears a striking resemblance to Jennifer Dodson." Once again, Claire surprises him with her candor.

"In what way?"

"In every way." Claire's voice trips.

"Except, of course, she is much younger."

Walker addresses the judge, then.

"Your Honor, I'd like to ask the bailiff to escort Ms. Del Toro into the courtroom."

The volume of chatter from the gallery escalates quickly as excitement and speculation run rampant. Anyone who followed the case knows that Celeste is rumored to look like the DA's former mistress, but because of Celeste's age, no pictures of her have been publicized. This is the first glimpse of the girl who supposedly caused Jack not only to stray once again, but to commit rape and violate the very laws he swore to uphold.

Jack doesn't turn around to see the rear door open, but he knows it has by the crowd's collective gasp. He hears the bailiff, "Everyone stay seated." He watches Claire, who watches Celeste. Any moment Celeste will stand only a few feet away, and he has to decide if he's going to look at her. If he doesn't, he'll appear guilty. If he does, he'll look as if he's trying to bully her.

He sneaks another peek at the jury, and sure enough, their gazes volley back and forth from Celeste to Jack, Jack to Celeste. Whatever he decides, they're poised to form a judgment about his decision.

And then she's there, in the periphery of his vision. He sees her shoes—black pumps. He sees her pants—black dress slacks. She's not dressed like a teenager; she's dressed like a lawyer. And suddenly Jack understands what Walker has done.

Jack knows he must look right at Celeste if he is to have any chance of being acquitted. He has to show no emotion, no reaction to Walker's stunt. He lifts his eyes to take in the rest of her—a black suit coat to match the slacks, a red silk blouse almost identical to the one Jenny wore in the picture—just as Earl objects.

"Your Honor, I strenuously object to this performance. What is the point of this, except to inflame the jurors'

emotions? If Ms. Del Toro is testifying, the jurors will see her then. She shouldn't be in the courtroom."

"Counsel, approach the bench," the judge says.

As they argue in muted whispers,

Celeste takes a seat in the chair next to Walker's empty one. Her hair has been cut to better match Jenny's style, even the necklace at her collarbone bears a striking similarity to the one in the picture. Yet, for all Walker's efforts to make her a twin of Jenny, she's still a child in adult clothing. She stares at her hands in her lap as if willing them to be still, but she can't stop kneading them together nervously. If she's not kneading, she's using one hand and then the other to tuck her hair behind her ears. Her frightened eyes seem to be held open permanently with invisible toothpicks.

Jack wonders if Michael told her that Jack knows about the letters, despite Jack's order not to. Earl plans to confront her with them when she takes the stand, but if she denies sending them, he'll recall Michael to the stand during the defense case. "The jury needs to understand this girl has major issues," Earl said, "and they have nothing to do with you, at least not in the way she claims they do."

But seeing Celeste now, Jack knows the last thing she needs is to take the witness stand. Her fear is palpable and Jack is certain it's not stage fright. The girl huddled at the prosecution table is an exaggerated version of the girl who sat in his car and begged him to keep her secrets. While they all sit in the courtroom playing this game, the real source of her fear still walks the streets.

Earl returns to the table and reports to Jack. "She has to leave now, but he won't cut off questioning. As we suspected, Walker intends to argue you simply couldn't keep your paws off Celeste because of her resemblance to Jenny."

"Yeah, that's it," Jack mutters. "Just line up a bunch of clones and I can't help myself."