Kiss and Burn (11 page)

Eli
removed his hand from her apex altogether and spread her for his mouth’s
assault, gathering as much cream on his tongue as he could before catching her
clit. She rocked forward and back, keeping in time with his ministrations as
she keened. He nurtured the bundle of nerves, reacquainting himself with the
underside of her hooded nub until one of her palms slapped the mattress. She
shuddered and moaned and his cock bounced in anticipation.

Stiffening
his tongue, he thrust it inside her canal and relished in the way she grew
wetter by the second, moving back with reckless abandon as she panted. He
removed it and encircled her star. Carmen snatched up a pillow and buried her
face into the feathers. She stiffened, and came with a partially muffled cry.

Satisfied,
Eli took the pillow from her, placed it beneath her tummy and after donning a
condom, he commanded, “Give me your hands.”

She did
as she was told, bringing her arms back and to her sides. He firmly encircled
her wrists as he positioned himself at her pussy. “Have you caught your second
wind yet?”

“Almost,”
Carmen gasped.

He
smirked. “No time for almost, baby.” Without another word he drove into her,
using his hold on her wrists as leverage for deeper thrusts. She met each
stroke with a unified rhythm that sent tingles through his thighs, as they
connected with her own in a loud slap of carnal pleasure. Her waist rolled and
he followed the movement, attempting to milk everything he could out of her
before they were separated. Eli wanted her slightly limping and wincing as she
sat for the rest of the day, desperate to create the kind of friction between
her legs that he endured when they fucked.

He knew
when he’d hit a particularly good spot because her entire body shook. Unlike
most men who’d take this as a sign to suddenly start doing something
completely
different—because stupidity
lead them to believe
that
was a good
idea—Eli worked that same spot until she called his name; until she couldn’t
breathe; until she was babbling and gushing on the length of him; until her
pussy squeezed him so hard that his eyes watered.

Carmen
came, screaming into the open air and Eli came too, hissing through clenched
teeth. The moment shudders stopped racking the both of them, they fell into a
tangled mess of limbs and harsh breaths.

“Okay…
maybe, just maybe, I can be a little needy,” she conceded curling into his
side.

Grinning
like mad, he dropped a kiss on her temple and curved a hand around her belly.
“And maybe, just maybe, I like you that way.”

“Can I
just—”

“No.”

“But I
need to—”

“No.”

“The
catering company is—”

“No.”

“Goddammit
Carmen, this is tyranny!”

“Tyranny
that you will fucking take and stop making us all mental with your obsessive
personality disorder! Today is about
fun.
You’re going to have fun. I’m going to have fun. Our mothers are going to
have fun and the guys are going to have fun! If I have to shove that fun down
your throat in the form of a size eight and a half sandal I fucking
will!”

Addison
leaned away from Carmen’s growl, blinked a few times and asked, “Size eight and
a half? Aren’t we stretching the truth a bit?”

“I’ll
hit you! I swear I’ll hit you!”

“No
one’s hitting anyone,” Angelina stated as she, Selena and Maikao’s mother,
Kalei — who’d arrived the day before with her husband in tow — joined them by
the pool. Addison and Maikao were following the tradition of spending time away
from one another before the wedding and so far, Carmen’s friend hadn’t relaxed
in the slightest.

“Can’t
make that promise,” Selena murmured taking a seat. “If she says one more thing
about flowers or food or the weather, I’m starching my palm.”

“Betrayer!”
Addison yelled.

Her
mother simply put a hand to her daughter’s mouth and said, “Quiet child, just…
quiet.”

Chuckling,
Kalei Iona asked, “Why are you so jittery? Everything is in place. You’ve made
sure of that.”

Addison
tucked in her lips and sat backwards.

Angelina
leaned towards her. “Addie?”

“It’s
stupid,” the younger woman mumbled.

 
“Not if venting it will give you and the rest
of us a little bit of peace,” Carmen told her. “I’ve seen you anal retentive,
but never like this.”

“Out
with it, child,” Selena encouraged.

Sighing,
Addison finally blurted, “What if we’re rushing? What if Maikao really doesn’t
want to marry me but is doing it because what we have is comfortable enough
that he could settle in for the rest of our lives? What if I’m not a good wife?
What if—”

“The
earth suddenly crashes into the sun tomorrow and we’re eviscerated?” Kalei
interrupted. “What if, what if, what if. You can ask yourself that question a
million times, darling, but you’ll never have the answer. You’re concerned
about rushing? You’ve been together for
five
years,
maybe not in the physical sense but your connection has been
visceral and real. You’re worried about my boy’s complacency? Maikao has been
nomadic in his dating patterns from the time he turned fourteen, he doesn’t
understand what
settling
is. He
picked you because he
doesn’t
feel
the need to move when you’re around. You ground him. And being a good wife is
about listening to their stupid jokes, concerning what happened down at the
station during lunch break. Praying with them, when they lose one of their own.
Rubbing their shoulders, when they’re too tired to move. Putting your cold feet
on their back to annoy them. Laughing, loving, simply,
being.
Love isn’t something you can meticulously plan and circle
off your list of things to do. You adore Maikao and Maikao adores you. I see
it, we
all
see it and that’s why
we’re here to watch you commit to making one another crazy for the rest of your
lives. Personally, I think you could do better than my wide shouldered clown,
who still giggles at Saturday morning cartoons but, I’m not supposed to say
these things because I’m his mother.”

Kalei
patted Addison’s hand. “You’re a good girl. Head strong, stubborn. He needs
that. Needs someone to tell him no, to tell him when he’s being an ass. Don’t
worry yourself, sweetheart, whether you know it or not you’re
exactly
what he needs. Relax and bask in
the fact that tomorrow you’re getting
married.”

For the
first time since this entire process had begun, Carmen felt envious. Not of
Addison or her relationship with Maikao but of what they’d found and of what
they’d continue to discover. The most dangerous part of allowing Eli into her
space was that their bond had gone beyond sex. It was beginning to branch into
unchartered territory; territory that included emotions she wasn’t willing to
look too closely at. She wouldn’t even discuss him with Addison, who she told
everything.

Everyday
had been intense, every smile, every shared laugh, every story they’d told the
other. It was all so surreal. She’d started this thinking that in a few days
she could shift her focus elsewhere after leaving her desire for him on the
beach but now she wasn’t so sure.

Love isn’t something you can meticulously
plan and circle off your list of things to do.

As
Addison finally decided to take
someone’s
advice and the conversation veered into where they would eat later, Carmen
found herself questioning if she’d retained common sense enough to
not
fall for a man who’d nicknamed his
penis
Barrington Alistair Jennings
because of its “refinement and sophistication.”

The
answer to that was a resounding
no
and
she knew she was fucked in ways that even Eli, with all his creative knowledge
of the Karma Sutra, hadn’t accomplished.

“Get
yourself together boy! You’re getting married in an hour!”

“Oh
God, oh God, oh God,” Maikao chanted at his father’s booming declaration. “I’m
getting married in an hour.” He suddenly stood and grabbed the lapels of Eli’s
tailored linen suit jacket. “I’m getting married in an
hour.”

Eli
patted his friend’s hands. “Yeah, buddy. I know, that’s what we’re here for.”

“No,
you don’t understand, I’m getting
married,”
Maikao repeated, shaking Eli now. “In an hour.”

Glancing
over the other man’s shoulder, Eli shot a look at Malo Iona.

Sighing,
the lieutenant made Maikao release his best man. “You’re having an altar break,
boy.”

“Altar
break? The hell is an alter break?”

“The
moment you realize your entire life is about to change and you’re responsible
for the emotional well-being of someone whose genetically predisposed to
not
being emotionally well at any time,”
Malo answered, making his son sit. “It’s a big step, Mak but Addison’s worth
it.”

“I
know.”

“She
loves you.”

“I
know.”

“You
love her.”

“I
know.”

“The
two of you were meant for each other.”

“I
know.”

“So you
have to get your shit together, get out there and make sure
she
knows,” the older man insisted. “You
have to make sure she feels secure and safe and all that other shit women
demand from us. You hold her and you never let go, got it?”

Maikao
nodded. “Yes, sir.”

“Good.”
He patted Maikao on the head. “I’d hug you but… You know… We’re men.”

“Sexist!”
Eli cried.

Malo
cuffed him. “Quiet.”

Eli
watched his friend pull himself together and wondered if he’d ever know this
same anxiety. Maybe. Maybe if he got Carmen to admit that she loved more than
just Barrington Alistair Jennings. Maybe if he got her to commit to more than
just their now routine morning showers. Maybe, just maybe, if he could ever
blurt the words, “
I think I love you”
without
feeling as though he’d blurt his lunch
also.

God, it
happened so fast. Too fast right? It had to have happened too fast because Eli
needed logic and reason to dig him out of the emotional hole he’d found himself
buried in. He wanted her more than anything he’d ever desired and that
frightened him more than any fire he’d ever fought, because rejection was not a
thing he was used too. Other women, other relationships, had spoiled him.
They’d made him oblivious to the true male and female dynamic, oblivious to the
way things
really
worked. What if
Carmen was able to walk away from him without a backwards glance in a few days?
What if he were the only one invested here? What if, what if, what if…

A hand
slamming into his back made Eli finally breathe. Only after he gasped in air
did he realize he hadn’t been inhaling for the extent of his mental monologue.
They’d spent the previous night together on the beach with beers, burgers and a
radio that had a station for American football. He’d been more relaxed then
than he was
now.

“Can’t
die on your best friend’s wedding day, boy. Wouldn’t be right,” Malo laughingly
told him.

Maikao
looked at him with a smirk, fixing his bowtie. “Seems I’m not the only one
having an altar break. What’s wrong, Aaronson? Afraid you’ll have to tuck your
wee-wee back into your big boy briefs when it’s all said and done?”

Eli’s
eyes narrowed. “You know my favorite part of all your nonsensical little jokes
and ramblings?”

“Nah,
what?”

“The
fact that you eventually grow silent and still enough for me to do this,” Eli
answered, punching the bastard in the balls. As Maikao hit the floor, rolling
back and forth while Malo laughed raucously, he stepped over him and asked,
“Who has to tuck his wee-wee in now?”

***

There
was something to be said for watching two wholly wonderful individuals
commemorate an affection that would last a life time. More could be said when
you’d watched
one
of those
individuals go from girl, to young adult, to woman. Carmen didn’t think she’d
cried this much in ever. The love she felt radiating off of both outshined the
anxiety and the fact that Makaio had dropped Addison’s wedding band twice
before he’d finally gotten it onto her finger. It outshined
everything.

As
“I love, you love”
began to stream
through the reception hall’s speakers, Carmen watched Makaio hold out his hand
for his wife, walking backwards as he led her to the dance floor. Addison
melted into him, placing her forehead to his shoulder while he played with the
backless cut of her simple, elegant gown. Her train trailed slightly when they
moved together and Carmen found it hard to breathe. It was staggering to
realize that someone you loved so much, had found someone else who could love
them differently and sometimes better. It was staggering to realize how badly
she wanted that for herself.

The
feel of fingers curling around her waist drew her eyes from the couple towards
the man who’d come to stand beside her.

Eli
nodded to where others were beginning to join the newlyweds. “Dance with me?”

Standing
straight, she followed him to the floor and curved her arms around his
shoulders while he placed his hands low on her waist, making sure the only
space between them consisted of their clothing.

“They
really did it,” he whispered. “They really got married.”

She
cleared her throat. “Yeah.”

“I
mean, we all knew it was coming, bound to happen eventually but I’m still a
little… You know?”

“Yeah.”

“Who
would’ve thought…?”

Carmen
tilted her head slightly and stared just over his shoulder. “Yeah.”

She
truly had no idea how much longer she could stay molded to him, his hand
running down her back, his thumb stroking her hip tenderly, while they swayed
in sync to music centered on
finding the
one
and not lose her shit. God, she’d been a fucking idiot to think she
could actually do this; spend time with him and him alone. Laughing, breathing
each other’s air, and enjoying just
being
had been a recipe for disaster from the start. Somehow she’d foolishly made
herself believe that Elijah Aaronson, a man who prided himself on his ability
to have any woman he wanted, would suddenly want just
one.

He’d
hinted at their continuing to see each other when they got back to Santa Fe,
had mentioned coming to Mexico again, had even told her she was more than
welcome to spend the night at his place should she need to, but that only told
her how much he’d enjoyed having sex with her in every strange place they could
think of. It didn’t give her even the slightest clue as to what he really
wanted. So, she’d decided to stop wondering, stop thinking, stop questioning
and just lay it to rest. Romantic declarations of love she would not get.

“We can
go for a walk on the beach when those two slip out,” Eli commented, resting his
chin on top of her head. “Unless you want to change first. I love this dress on
you but there’s a possibility it could get ruined.”

Carmen
snorted. “Haven’t we done it on the beach already?”

He drew
backwards and frowned. “Done it?” Realization dawned on his face. “I wasn’t
talking about sex. I meant an actual walk. When two people hold hands and
talk.”

Her
lashes lowered as she slid a hand down his chest. “Why? We can just go back to
the hotel room and—”

Eli
caught her wrist. “Why do you do that?”

She
looked back up, tugging her hand away at his scowl. “Do what?”

“Reduce
everything to sex? Believe me when I say I enjoy it—every minute of it—but I
like to do other things with you too.”

“And
they all lead to sex so why waste time?”

A
muscle in his jaw leapt. He watched her for a moment as their movements ceased.
“Why are you doing this?”

“Doing
what?” she challenged. “Being honest? We like fucking each other.”

He
looked away from her. “Is that all you like, Carmen?”

She
didn’t respond.

“Is
it?” Eli pressed.

“Don’t,”
Carmen told him.

“No, I
want to know. Is my bending you over and sticking my dick in you,
all
you like about me?”

She
pushed at his shoulders but he wouldn’t release her. “Grow up.”

“Me?”
he bit out. “
I
should grow up? You’re
playing this fucking ‘
I want you but I
won’t tell you that’
game and
I
need
to grow up?”

“Yes,”
she snarled, digging her nails into his forearm. “The only reason you’re so
bothered is because you want to be the only one detached here. You want me to
fall and plead and beg and chase you because that’s what you’re used to. You
want
me ruined.”

He
slowly shook his head. “You can’t be that fucking dense.”

Carmen
tried to pull away again but he wouldn’t release her. “Let go of me.” If he
didn’t she might tell him. Tell him that he
had
ruined her and only after a short amount of time. Tell him that she
did
want to fall and plead and beg and
chase him.

“Stop
it, dammit,” he growled, jostling her. “I’m not the detached one here. It’s
you.
You,
Carmen.
That’s
 
why you were always opposed to us
getting involved. You felt like it would leave you vulnerable and now that’s no
longer necessarily an option so you’re placing things in the context of
 
not
 
expecting much to come from what
happens from our time here.” Eli locked eyes with her.
“You’re purposely avoiding any chance of intimacy. That’s the
reason you agreed to this. Because you believe that if we fuck just enough,
I’ll lose interest and you’ll feel justified. Then you’ll be well within your
rights to walk away from me like nothing ever happened.” 

She froze.

“I’m not stupid and I’m not oblivious, sweetheart. I’ve taken
note of every nuance about you whether you believe it or not,” Eli continued.
“You can cling to the expectation of hurt and heartbreak but remember you’re
not the only person with feelings here. I have them too. Either you’re
incredibly low in self-confidence or you
really
believe I’m a substance lacking, pussy hound who can stroll away from this
undamaged and unbothered.” He angled forward until their noses touched. “I love
you but I won’t let you pigeonhole me when I have done
nothing
to deserve it. My attention, my focus and my time has been
spent on
you
while it’s becoming perfectly
clear that yours has been spent on how much of a dick you think I am. ”

With that, he finally let her go. “If anyone asks, I’m going to
get drunk on the beach like any self-respecting man would do in this situation
and try not to drown.”

She
watched him walk away from her, snagging a bottle of bourbon from the bar on
his way out the door. Carmen looked about to find several pairs of eyes on her.
Addison’s included.

“
Go after him,”
her friend mouthed.

He’d
said he loved
her. Elijah Aaronson
had said he
loved
her.

“Go,”
Angelina said shoving Carmen towards the door. “I want
nietos
and you will not stand in my way!”

Carmen
stumbled forward. He loved her. She decided then to get ready to enjoy the
taste of humble pie because God knew she would be eating plenty of it.

***

Eli’s
throat burned but he’d be damned if he gave up the one thing that was stopping
him from going back into the reception hall, throwing Carmen over his shoulder
like he had days ago and fucking the truth out of her. She had to be out of her
goddamn mind if she honestly thought she was the only one who felt something
between the two of them.

A sound
of disgust left him.
“Oh Eli, your
genitals are great. You? Not so much…”
he mocked in a high pitched tone.

No one
was around to hear said mocking though. He’d trudged through the water until he
found a grouping of rocks and made himself comfortable on a boulder, his pants
rolled up. His shirt, tie and jacket were all forgotten on the shore. He’d paid
a pretty penny for the suit and couldn’t care less if the pieces wound up being
carted off by some freaky creature living in the sand.

He was
annoyed. Annoyed and in love and really fucking annoyed that he was in love.
And who did he have to blame for all of this? Carmen! He blamed her for
everything!
For being so goddamn
engaging, so goddamn intelligent, so goddamn funny and gorgeous and lovely and
all the shit her character had developed over thirty odd years, preparing her
to trap someone like his poor, poor soul into adoring her.