Learning to Stand (9 page)

She fell silent. He stroked her
shoulder.

“
I feel like there’s no safe
place to rest my head,” she whispered.

Pulling her lips into a tight line, she
wished she had not let the thought out of her head.

“
You have me.”

“
Yes, my husband who thinks
I’m fucking my partner.”

“
I’m sorry. I don’t mean for
my insecurity to injure you.”

Alex shrugged.

“
I’m still… recovering…,”
John said. “Yes, recovering is probably the best word. I’m
recovering from losing you last fall. I thought I would never see
you again. I...”

Alex nodded watching his eyes fill with
unshed tears.

“
I love you,” he
said.

She smiled.

“
How is it for you to be
pregnant?” she asked.

“
Oh, as usual, I want
to…”

“…
control everything,” they
said together. They laughed.

“
I’m excited and very sad. I
knew we couldn’t keep him…”

“
Because of the
depo?”

“
Because of the depo. But,
oh I don’t know. It’s so… normal to be pregnant. Last year, we’ve
had a real church wedding in front of our families and friends. Now
we’re pregnant... It’s like we’re normal people.”

John smiled. Alex looked up at his face and
they laughed.

“
And finally you’re barefoot
and pregnant,” John said. In a flood of speech, he began: “And our
lives will be entwined forever. He’ll be beautiful with his
mother’s brown eyes and my brain. And he’ll grow big and strong. He
will laugh all the time like his mother. We’ll take him to the park
to play on the swings. We’ll buy car seats and baby clothing. Your
breasts will get huge. I’ll work to support us. And...”

He stopped talking when she sniffed at a
tear. He rolled onto his side. Holding her face, he wiped her tears
with his thumbs.

“
And I wouldn’t be me. And
you wouldn’t be you. We’d live someone else’s life.”

“
That’s what you
want.”

“
Never. I want you. I want
to be me. You?”

“
There’s a little Catholic
girl inside me who wants all of that and more,” she said. “But I’d
never be happy. Never. And Simon won’t live. I… I don’t think I can
have babies. So it’s all a dream.”

“
A nightmare, sounds
like.”

“
I guess so,” she said. “I
do love you, John Kelly.”

“
I’m so very glad. How much
time do we have?”

“
About a half hour,” she
said.

He slipped on top of her. He caught her lips
then work his way from her face. She gasped at his teeth pulling on
her nipple.

He stopped. Pushing himself up onto his
elbow, he looked up into her face.

“
Simon? You named my son,
Simon?”

Alex laughed.

F

CHAPTER SEVEN

Four hours later
Wednesday morning

March 26 – 5:45 A.M. MDT
Military Intelligence, Buckley Air Force Base

After rounding up Raz, Vince, Troy and
Matthew, Alex’s Sergeant reminded her that she forgot Sergeant
Larry Flagg.

Again.

And where was Sergeant Flagg?

He didn’t answer his home phone or his cell
phone. Matthew dropped by his home on his way to base. Sergeant
Flagg wasn’t at home. Figuring he’d show up, they once more forgot
Sergeant Flagg. Certainly, there was plenty of work to do.

About an hour later, the Denver Police
called. Sergeant Lawrence Flagg had been picked up for driving
under the influence with a blood alcohol of 0.45. Because his blood
alcohol was so high, the police took him to Denver Health for
detox. Alex’s cell number was the only number he could remember
this morning. Of course, the Denver Police would be happy to
release him to her custody but Major Drayson needed get him.

Dressed in her winter gear, Alex left the
men with detailed instructions on what they needed to resolve while
she was gone. One last, ‘Get to work’ and she wandered down an
early-morning quiet hallway. Turning into a long still hallway, she
felt alone in a quiet world.

“
Where ya going?”

Alex yelped with surprise. On guard, she
turned in place to see a large, muscle bound man. He laughed at
Alex’s response. Even in his heavy winter gear, his barrel chest
and twenty inch arms were apparent. Smiling, his tear drop tattoo
scrunched into the brown skin near his left eye.

“
Gotcha,” Trece
said.

“
Andy! I thought you and
Chris were out of the country.” Alex was swallowed in a muscular
hug.

“
We’re a part of your team,
Major,” he said.

“
So where’s Chris?” She
raised an eyebrow.

“
Getting coffee for you,”
Trece said.

Alex turned to see an equally muscular man
trot down the hallway with a travel mug in his hand. Beaming at
Alex, his near albino skin and pale blue eyes glistened under the
florescent lights.

“
Here you go, Alex,” White
Boy said.

“
What do I owe this
privilege?” Alex asked.

“
We are hoping you’ll
request us for this project,” White Boy said.

“
I sent the request a couple
hours ago,” Alex said. “How did you...?”

“
We have our ways,” Trece
said. He winked at Alex. “Where ya going?”

“
Pick up Sergeant Flagg at
Denver Health. He got a DUI last night.”

“
That’s mighty unbecoming,”
Trece said. “Isn’t he an officer?”

Alex curled her lip at Trece.

“
Are you going to…” White
Boy started.

“
Kill him,” Alex
said.

“
Now Alex, that’s mighty
violent,” Trece said. “I’d offer to kill him for you
but...”

Alex laughed.

“
Can we come with you?”
White Boy asked. “We hear there’s a contract...”

“
You look like you could use
our company,” Trece talked over White Boy. “We are your favorite
White Boy and Trece.”

“
I think you’re the only
White Boy and Trece,” Alex said.

“
See the coffee worked,”
White Boy said.

With the two men beside her, Alex walked to
her Jeep CJ.

“
I can’t believe they didn’t
blow this car up,” White Boy said. “How long you had
this?”

“
Since high school,” Alex
said. Pulling up to the guard gate, she added, “Don’t tell anyone
but this is the only car I can drive.”

The men laughed. Friends for over a decade,
Alex and Jesse met them in the mess hall in Bosnia. Trece and White
Boy laughed, workout and generally cheered Alex and Jesse through
the rest of the tour. They celebrated Jesse and Alex’s acceptance
to Special Forces school. They arrived ready to party not moments
after Jesse and Alex graduated. Throughout her career, Trece and
White Boy would pop up at the oddest times: stuck in Bagdad during
‘shock and awe;’ in the middle of a sandstorm in Afghanistan; two
days after she married John and just now, when she had been told
they were out of the country and couldn’t get back for a week.

As always, she was happy for their inane
company.

She’d hoped to get them a hundred percent of
the time. For now, forty percent of their time would have to
suffice. Of course, since Trece talked one hundred percent of the
time it felt like she had him one hundred percent time.

Turning into the parking lot at Denver
Health, she snorted at her joke.

“
You’re not as funny as you
think you are. I however am much funnier than...” Trece held the
entrance door for a woman. “Well, hello.”

While Alex and White Boy continued through
the door, Trece stop at the door to flirt with the nurse. Alex
spoke with the Denver Police then the doctor. She signed papers,
and even arranged Larry’s bail, before Trece caught up with
them.

“
That was a sweet honey,”
White Boy said.

Trece beamed his acknowledgement of the
sweetness of the woman. Alex opened her mouth to ask what took him
so long then decided she didn’t want to know. She closed her
mouth

“
She has a sweet friend,”
Trece said. He held up two phone numbers. “Perfect for some lonely
visitors.”

“
When have you been lonely?”
Alex asked.

“
Could happen. Could
happen,” Trece said. “Well hello…”

He and White Boy stopped to watch a nurse
walk by. Blushing, the nurse waved her fingers at the men.

“
Where have you been?
Siberia?” Alex asked. She showed her ID to a policewoman near the
nurse’s station. The policewoman pointed toward Larry’s door.
“You’re randy even for you!”

“
Desert,” Trece said. “Did
you know there is a war going on?”

“
Two.” Alex wrinkled her
nose at him.

“
Three really,” White Boy
said.

Alex stood in front of Larry’s door.

“
Well hello...” Trece said
to a passing nurse.

“
Why don’t you stay here and
I’ll deal with Flagg?”

“
Great idea.”

“
Do not leave this door,”
Alex said. “No bathrooms, no...”

“
We’ll keep it zipped at
least until we leave the hospital.” Trece smiled his alter boy
smile.

Alex scowled a ‘You better’ at him then went
into the room. Larry was watching television. Sitting up on an
elbow, his face broke into his characteristic bright smile.

“
Hi Major!” Larry exclaimed.
His hands grabbed at his throbbing head.

“
Slowly,” Alex
said.

“
Where am I?” Larry
asked.

“
Denver Health. You got very
drunk last night. The Denver Police picked you up outside the
Squire on Colfax. You were passed out in your car. You had alcohol
poisoning. And you now have a DUI plus a whole bunch of other
trouble.”

“
Oh.” Larry’s bright smile
faded. “I was just thinking that I’ve never been in the hospital
before.” Larry flipped his legs to the edge of the bed and lurched
forward to grab his head again. “I guess I was in the hospital when
you broke my leg. But I was on base. It wasn’t much different than
being in the barracks. How long will I stay here?”

“
The doctor wants to see you
this morning to decide. You have been very, very sick.”

“
I feel very, very sick. Why
do you look so serious? Aren’t you the one who always says 'Don’t
take everything so seriously’?”

“
You have a lot of legal
problems. I’m able to take custody of you, but Colonel Gordon is
looking to discharge you for conduct unbecoming of an
officer.”

She paused to let the information sink
in.

“
But guys get DUIs all the
time. They don’t get discharged.”

“
You’re an intelligence
officer, Sergeant Flagg. A Special Forces Intelligence Officer.
Tell me. Who do you know who is a Special Forces Intelligence
Officer who has received a DUI?”

Larry fell silent.

“
No one, I
guess.”

“
We can demote you. Hell,
the Admiral might want your beret.”

“
My beret? Yeah, you may as
well take my beret. You hate me anyway.”

“
Hate you?” Alex
groaned.

Jesse appeared by her side. “He got his
orders to go to the sand. He’s leaving in three months. He’s
freaked about going to war so he got shit faced.”

Alex crossed her arms.

“
Don’t let him ruffle you.”
Jesse moved in front of her. “And don’t yell. It’s a
hospital.”

Alex gave him a curt nod.

“
What does the great Jesse
have to say?” Larry asked. “He’s the only fucking person you care
about, and he’s not even alive.”

“
You can see
Jesse?”

“
I see the dust light up…
like sparklers… So what did he say?”

“
He said you got your
orders.”

Larry face blanched then went red. His mouth
flapped open and closed. Looking away from Alex, he mimicked her
crossed arms. When he turned back, he was one hundred percent
angry, drunk and hung over.

“
You forget me. Every single
time. Troy thinks I’m a joke. Matthew treats me like I’m three
fucking years old. Raz won’t even talk to me. Vince pinches his
eyebrows when I talk. No response. Just this weird look. Trece told
me he was going to kill me. Kill… ME! And the Jakker openly laughs
when I talk.”

Alex could barely contain her disgust for
the Sergeant. She fought, worked, struggled and suffered to get a
chance to wear a beret. This stupid, selfish drunken fool would
throw it away.

“
Here are your options.”
Alex pressed forward to keep from throwing up. “First, you must
apologize to your commanding officer for your conduct, attitude and
diatribe. Once your commanding officer accepts your heartfelt
apology, you must apologize to the men.”

“
Then what?”

“
Colonel Gordon can move you
to a team at MI, either Fort Carson or Cheyenne Mountain. They do
straight up Military Intelligence. Your other option is to work
this out right here, right now.”

“
I… I… Can I think about
it?” Larry asked.