Left Behind

10 years ago

It felt like the world was crashing down around me. My legs wouldn’t hold me anymore, and if it weren’t for the three sets of arms holding me, I would have fallen.

How could everyone just abandon me? Jordan
, my older brother , left for Georgia State yesterday on his football scholarship. He wants to major on computer engineering. I’m very proud of him, but I’ll miss him so much. He is only three years older than me at eighteen, but he has practically raised James and me since Mommy died.

I still have my younger brother James and my dad, but James is starting the foreign exchange in a month, going to Japan, and of course Daddy has been a workaholic since he quit drinking when my mom died five years ago, so I never see him. He only comes home to sleep.

The people I thought I could count on, my best friends, are leaving. Toby, Tory, and Troy all had told me at different times that they would always be there for me. Now they are leaving to join different branches of the military as required by their grandfather ’
s will to inherit the ranch and business that has been in their family for generations. In my head I know they have to go, but my heart won’t listen. I’ve been in love with them since I met them when my dad bought the land neighboring theirs when I was ten. For five years they have been coming to the ranch to learn everything from their Grampa Tobias. They have come to the ranch every summer and school holiday for their whole lives. Toby’s dad was a judge and hadn’t ever wanted the ranch, so it automatically went to the trips.

We had met the day my family moved next door to them. Dad and Jordan wouldn’t let me help unpack the moving van. They said I was too little, but they let James help, and he had been smaller than me!? How was that possible? I discovered , by their continued behavior later on , that they were just trying to protect and coddle me because I was the only girl left in the family. My name is Martha Mckayla Cunningham and everyone called me Kayla until Mommy died, then for some reason Daddy and the boys started calling me Marti, short for Martha of course . They let me go anywhere I wanted as long as I stayed on our property.

T
he day we moved I had been upset and crying because they wouldn’t let me help, so I walked around our land, which was mostly covered in trees, and found this beautiful bubbling creek in the woods a little ways from the house. I sat there crying when three identical boys , that looked to be Jordan’s age, came riding up to the fence that separated our lands.

“Whacha cryin’ for?” one of them said as they all got off their horses and led them to the water for a drink. They climbed over the fence and came to sit beside me.

“Nobody won’t let me help set up our new house. They told me to find something to do. I can help, and I wanna help, but they won’t let me!” I cried.

The boys on either side of me put their arms around my shoulders.

“Well, why don’t we find something to do? My name is Toby, what’s yours?” The one on the right said.

“They call me Marti.”

“Hey Marti! I’m Troy and that’s Tory.” The boy on the left said as he pointed to the boy beside Toby.

“Do you want to ride my horse?” Toby asked.

“I really want to, but Jordan told me to stay on our land.” I said, sad at not being able to ride.

“Well, you want to feed them? We each brought treats for them for the ride today.” Tory said.

“I’d love to, thanks!”

And after that
day
, we were practically inseparable. They became friends with all of us, but we were closer. I fell in love with them, but I could never choose between them, so I never said anything.

And now they were leaving.

“You know we will come here for all of our leaves. You’ll still see us, Pea.” Toby said using his endearment for me. They had each given me a different one.

“Cupcake, please don’t cry…” Troy said

“It breaks our heart, Princess. We promised you a long time ago there would be no need for tears while you are with us.” Tory said finishing Troy’s statement.

I looked up into their amber eyes. They were all so beautiful in a manly way, with buzz cut black hair and russet skin tone showing their Cherokee heritage. They all had the build of hard workers, and they kept getting bigger.

“That’s just it.” I cried. “I won’t be with you.”

Seeing the anguish on their faces, I tried to pull myself together. I hated myself for making them feel bad for leaving.

“Okay
. I know y’all have to go. I’ll be alrigh t. We’re gonna write and like you said, I’ll see you on each of your leaves. I’ll be busy with school and work anyway. Y’all just have to promise me to be careful wherever you each are stationed.”

They each backed up and looked down at me (they are a foot taller than me at 6’3) and smiled.

“You know us…” Toby said.

“We are always…” Troy continued.

“Careful and in control, Princess.” Tory finished. They had a habit of sharing sentences thinking it was funny .

I laughed. “Thank you. Y’all always know what to say to make me feel better. I’
ll miss all of you.
I’ll be here waiting for everyone to come back.”

“What about your plans for college, Pea?” Toby asked.

“I’ll be going to community college. Dad needs someone to keep him sane. You know he never cooks anymore, and wouldn’t eat if it weren’t for me shoving the plate in his face as soon as he gets home every day.” I exaggerated a sigh. “It’s nice to be needed.”

“We’ll always need ya, Cupcake. But you’ll have to do the beatin’ of any boys comin’ your way. Just remember what we taught ya.” Tory said.

“Yea
h
, yea h , fight dirty and fight to win. I gotcha.”

I watched as my boys
finished loading their SUV
. They each gave me a long hug and a peck on the mouth. They got in, and I watched them drive down the gravel driveway until I couldn’t see them anymore.

And then I was alone.

I woke up
drenched in sweat. It’s not really unusual for me anymore. More like the norm. I got up and took a shower before heading down the dark hallway to the kitchen.
The hall is not that long, but it’s dark because I keep my whole house that way.
I like to keep the windows covered by the drapes and all of the doors closed . I am so paranoid about someone looking in to the house through the windows , even though I am surrounded by the woods except for my gravel driveway, but even that is canopied by trees .

I’m
still
in the house Daddy bought fifteen years ago. He died two years ago, but left the house to me along with a hefty life insurance policy that neither my brothers nor I knew about. He only left it to me, explaining that he loved all of us, but had taken me for granted for all those years I cared for him. He said he did appreciate it, but he hadn’t known how to talk to me because I reminded him too much of our mother. He said for us not to morn him that he was happy that he would finally be with Mommy again since he’d been saved. Come to find out, Daddy had liver cance r from all of the years of drinking he did before Mommy died. He didn’t want treatment, because he missed Mommy to o much and was happy that he would be reunited with her. Jordan and James weren’t upset about the money or the house. Daddy had paid for their education and got them into their own apartments , though Jordan moved back in with me so I wouldn’t be alone . I shared the money with them anyway.

I went to the island workstation that has a sink, built in fryer, and a built in flat surface stove top. James, being an architect , designed the remodel of my kitchen. He built me my dream kitchen and put in all of the most up to date appliances for me.

I put a pot of water on to boil for my morning grits, and got a frying pan out to fix Jordan his eggs before he headed into his home office for the day, if he didn’t have any other plans .
He owns an internet security company.
He also build s websites for people. He does really well for himself. I set my sweet iced tea and his orange juice and coffee on the table, and then finished cooking our breakfast.

I could
n’t talk or make any sounds anymore due to an incident that happened last year, so I typed that breakfast was ready into the voice machine that Jordan built for me and set it for loud so it could call Jordan for me. I laughed silently like I do every time I use it for that, because it shouts louder than I used to.

A couple of minutes later, Jordan walked in.

“Good morning, Sis!” He said sitting down at the booth-like table next to the bay wind ows. “What masterpiece did you make for me this morning?”

‘
A farmer’s omelet.
’
I signed to him. Jordan, James and I all took an ASL course, after we learned I would never be able to speak again, to make communicating easier than having to write or type everything.
The doctors had wanted me to get an artificial voice box, but I didn’t want anyone ever cutting on me again, so I declined.

‘
What are your plans for today ?
’
I asked him.

“I’ll be spending today up in Charlotte to get the updated equipment I need. I’ll be stopping in town on my way back to stock up on groceries and supplies. Make your list of what you need.”

‘
You should have told me last night. That way y ou wouldn’t have to wait on me .
I reprimanded .
I’ve got a pretty long list .
’

I started making the list out while I finished eating my grits.

“What are your plans?” He asked after he had finished eating and was rinsing his plate to put in the dishwasher.

I put d
own my pen so I could answer.
‘
I’ll just be working on my book today .
’
I had decided to write a book using a story I had started in high school. I had several stories I wanted to try to get published if the first one went well .

“Please, stay inside today. You can use my office if you’d like, but I’d rather you didn’t go to the creek while I’m not here. Even with your panic bracelet, I won’t be close enough to help if something happens.”

I usually did my writing at the creek. It was
my thi nking place because I always fe l t so safe and tranquil there. It was my favorite place be cause it was our place. The triplets’
and mine. Since I went out there so often and couldn’t yell if something happened, Jordan had made me a bracelet that had an electronic device in it where if I were to push the button, it would immediately alert him through his masculine version of my bracelet. He was very protective of me, and worried every time I left the house. Not that I ever go anywhere.

‘
I wasn’t planning on it.
I said in answer to his plea.
I was just going to lie in bed and use the laptop. I’m feeling lazy today .
’