Left Together (20 page)

When
we pull apart, the first thing I notice is that her tears have stopped. There
is also a calmness on her face that wasn’t there before. “I missed you,” Kacie
tells me.

“You’ll
never have to miss me again,” I vow.

“Oh,
um…” a voice says. “Well, that explains the change of heart rate on the
monitor.”

Kacie
smiles at me, slightly loosening her grip on my shirt. “You might want to turn
that shit off, unless you care to be notified every time my boyfriend kisses me.
He does it quite often, so it might get really old, really fast.” And, just
like that, we’re back in the hospital room. It’s okay for now because I know it
won’t be long before we’re gone again.

Kacie

Being
disoriented when you wake up is one of the most awful feelings you can
experience. It’s hard to remember where I was before falling asleep or the
reason for such a deep slumber. In my limited field of vision, nothing looks
familiar. Nothing feels right, either. What the hell is going on? It feels as
though there’s a huge weight holding me to the bed, preventing any real
movement. There’s a low, constant beeping noise coming from somewhere on my
right, but when I try turning to see what it is, a stabbing pain rips through the
left side of my chest. That’s when it all starts coming back to me.

Call
it immaturity, naiveté, or even just plain old stupidity, but there was a part
of me deep down that held a shred of hope that my parents would still be proud
of my accomplishments, despite their clear expectations. Maybe it was more a
feeling of
need
rather than hope. I was hoping that once they heard how
I graduated at the top of my class, they’d understand my passion for teaching.
Or, if that wasn’t enough, perhaps they would at least listen to the good I did
for one particular little boy who now has the help he needs to succeed not only
in school, but also in life. How would they be able to discredit my decision
knowing that? Sure, it’s not as extravagant as performing lifesaving surgery,
but providing a fundamental education for our future doesn’t seem all that dreadful.
Once again, I was disappointed by the two people who created me. It’s a mistake
I will never make again, nor give a second thought to from here on out. One of
the main reasons I came back to Tampa was to show them I was successful,
regardless of my career choice. I’ve mentally scratched that off my to-do list.
Some things just aren’t worth wasting energy on. Not anymore.

Leaving
my house wasn’t exactly what I planned, but I had to get out before the walls
closed in on me. Only because Noah was there did I feel comfortable doing that.
My brother would take care of everything. He always did. Seeing Sean’s car in
my rearview mirror irritated me beyond belief. I figured I’d steer my
convertible to the side of the road and let him pass. Seeing a truck parked on
the shoulder up ahead, I was afraid it would be hard to see around it when it
was time to leave, so I wanted to pull in front of it. At the time, it seemed
like the logical thing to do. Had I known the son of a bitch was about to run
me into the huge ass truck, I may have reconsidered.

From
that point on, time moved in fast forward. One second, I watched as Sean sped
up behind me, and the next, half of my car was pushed under the fucking truck.
I vaguely remember trying to protect my face with my arm from whatever was
crushing the driver’s door inward. Thankfully, the pain of what I’d later find
out to be a broken humerus and cracked ribs distracted me from the blood that spilled
from the gash in my head. Good thing or I would have probably puked all over
and passed out. Almost immediately, there were strangers banging on the windows
and yanking at the door on the opposite side of the car. Wasn’t the truck on
that side? How the hell did I get turned around? People kept asking my name and
telling me to hold still. A couple guys used some tools to get the door open.
One of them climbed in to sit with me until Nate got there. Of course, my
ex-boyfriend had to be the one to see me. I made him call Noah. Nate yelled
something about trying to get me out before calling him, but I made him do it
anyway.

Noah
was there at the doors of the emergency room the moment I was pulled from the
ambulance. He immediately grabbed my hand and told me everything would be okay.
It was odd how, with all of the chaos going on, knowing my big brother was there
calmed me down. I’m sure it had nothing to do with the medication Nate had
given me a few minutes prior. Listening to all of the medical bullshit being
thrown around made me even happier about my chosen profession. Who the hell had
time to remember what all of that shit meant? I just closed my eyes and waited
for Noah to tell me what I needed to know.

When
Noah asked if he should call Evan, the pain came back in full force.
Unfortunately, there wasn’t a strong enough medication in the world to dull
that ache. I told him no and he started asking questions about what was going
on between the two of us. Telling my brother in front of his co-workers how I
slept with Jake wasn’t going to happen. Hell, I’d never even tell him if it was
only him and I in the room. Instead of allowing him the chance to get anything
out of me, I insisted he call Jade. It was almost time for her to wake up to go
to work anyway. I wasn’t sure why I thought she’d still go into the office and
wait for news, but my best friend was at my side within minutes. She also
suggested calling Evan but, again, I refused.

After
hearing over and over how lucky I was to have gotten away from the
accident
as well as I did, going under anesthesia was a welcome relief. Did these people
not understand that someone purposely shoved my car underneath a truck? Exactly
what part of that made me lucky? Noah, along with our father’s friend, Dr. Harris,
explained everything that was going to happen. I wasn’t so sure giving me
details of how they were going to cut open my arm and stick pins in my bone to
hold it together was the right thing to do. My nerves were already shot. The
worst thing I’d ever really had was a cough and a runny nose at the same time.

Feeling
warmth on my hand, I slowly shift to look that way. I don’t have long to
process who’s sitting there, but no amount of time is necessary. Just seeing
the top of his head resting on the bed next to me is all I need. How the hell
will I be able to think fast enough through this fog in my head to make him
leave? He’ll be able to put up more of a fight than I have in me right now. The
one thing I absolutely refuse to do is destroy him with the truth. It has
nothing to do with the promise Jake and I made to each other about never
bringing it up. My only concern is not hurting Evan. He’s innocent in this
whole mess. What happened as a result of my father’s interference doesn’t count.
That was always a possibility and I knew it, even if Evan was in denial.

Getting
Evan out of this room is going to be a lot trickier than I thought. The moment
he notices I’m awake, his eyes fill up with tears. Knowing I have to send him
away, my heart collapses because all I really want is for Evan to crawl into
this bed and hold me. His presence alone gives me a sense of security I’ve
never experienced before. Sure, I feel safe with Noah and even Jake, but
nothing compares to being with Evan. He makes it seem as though he’ll protect
me from the entire world. Without him, I’ll never feel safe again.

Once
he blinks away the moisture, it’s painfully obvious how worn out he is. He’s
barely able to keep his gorgeous blue eyes open. His typically messy hair
always has order in every strand. It’s Evan’s
chaotic
order, but it’s
still order. Not now. Some parts are almost flat to his head, where some appear
to take on a life of their own. I desperately want to run my fingers through it
to fix it for him.

The
razorblades in my throat when I speak are only soothed when Evan’s lips caress
my head. As soon as he removes them, not only do I suffer the aftermath of
broken bones, but every muscle in my body becomes tense and sore. Noah said I’d
feel like shit for a few days. This must be what he meant. Judging by the way
Evan is reacting when I try to move, it must be agonizing for him to watch. All
the more reason to get him out of here.  

Not
having time to develop some kind of plan really is an enormous disadvantage for
me, especially since Evan seems like he’s prepared. How did he know I was going
to push him away? As if telling me I had an allergic reaction and had been unconscious
for a whole day wasn’t shocking enough, he blurts out how he knows the very
thing I was trying to keep from him. The knowledge steals my breath, but I
recover and tell him we still shouldn’t be together. Evan doesn’t accept it,
which is what starts to wear me down. I’m afraid his tolerance of the situation
is only because of the severity of the accident. In a few days, how I ruined
what we had will set in and he’ll realize things between us will never be the
same. He’ll never be able to trust me again and he’ll leave. No good will come
of prolonging the inevitable.

Out of
nowhere, Evan says the words I never expected to hear. There’s no denying the
meaning behind them, either. They’re full of emotion, significance and, most of
all, truth. It’s obvious his delivery of these particular words wasn’t what he
had in mind, but the way he expresses his feelings for me couldn’t have been
more perfect. I’ve never felt more admiration and passion from anyone else in
my entire life. The tone of his voice, along with the expression on his
handsome face, leads me to believe there’s still a way for us to come out of
this together. Maybe it’s just that I’m getting caught up in the moment. Maybe
it’s the exhaustion of the last couple of days. Maybe it’s just wishful
thinking, but I’m willing to risk it. I’m willing to take the chance that Evan
can really forgive my unintentional recklessness and we can move forward. One
thing I’m a hundred percent sure of is I’ll never, ever forget the first time
Evan Pierce told me he loved me.

We’re
brought back into the harsh reality of the situation by a nurse poking her head
in. I want nothing more than to be alone with Evan, but I know she has a job to
do. It’s been well over a week since all this drama unfolded and I want to put
it all behind me. Behind us. As she approaches my bed, Evan attempts to back
away. When I refuse to release his shirt, he leans over to softly kiss my lips
and runs his thumb over my cheek.

“I’m
not going anywhere,” he whispers with an encouraging smile. Reluctantly, I let
him go. He only takes a step or two toward the end of the bed, giving the nurse
enough space to stand next to me. I remember to breathe once I feel his hand on
my leg. “Kacie, this is Brandi. She’s been really nice to me, so please don’t
give her a hard time.”

Glancing
over at him, I ask, “What makes you think I’m going to give her a hard time?” I
can barely recognize my own voice. It’s really going to annoy the shit out of
me.

“Sweetheart,”
Evan says, raising his eyebrows, “you give everyone a hard time.”

“I do
not,” I protest, causing a cough to escape. Note to self… If you don’t want to
feel like you’re being ripped into pieces, don’t cough. Evan squeezes my leg as
I wait for the pain to subside.

“I’m
afraid that’s going to happen because you’ve been lying flat for so long,”
Brandi says. “How are you feeling otherwise?” She removes the stethoscope from
around her neck and is putting them to her ears.

“Like
I’ve been run over by an eighteen wheeler.” Evan sharply inhales. “Sorry,” I
say to him, but he doesn’t reply. He just runs his hand through his hair.

Being
the perfect patient Evan wants me to be, I answer all of the nurse’s questions.
I breathe in when she asks. I move when she wants me to, which hurts. I listen
to everything she has to say. Evan owes me big time for this. Brandi tells me
Noah should be back in a few minutes, so she isn’t going to touch my arm. She
does check the stitching over my left eye. I wish she didn’t remind me about
it. The uneasiness in my stomach creeps in again, the way it had when the
doctor sewed it together. I can hear Evan chuckling because he knows it’s grossing
me out. The glare I send in his direction silences him.

“I’m
going to get you something for the pain. I’ll be right back.”

“I can
wait,” I say. When she looks at me, I explain, “It will just make me tired.”
The truth is, I hate taking that shit.

“Kacie,
you’re hurting. Just take it. You don’t have to suffer,” Evan says. By that, he
means
he
doesn’t want to suffer.

“After
I talk to Noah,” I say, ending the conversation, then relaxing my head back onto
the pillow. “If the shivering would stop, every inch of my body wouldn’t hurt
so damn bad.” The nurse and Evan exchange a look and he sits down on the bed
next to my leg.

“What
happened to not being difficult?” Evan teases, pulling the blanket up to my
shoulders and rubbing my good arm.

“That
was the best I could do,” I say, closing my eyes. I’m hoping that if I concentrate
really hard on being warm, it will help. It doesn’t.

“I
know,” he grumbles. Seconds later, I hear him thank Brandi for something. When
I open my eyes, Evan is unfolding another blanket. The moment he lays it over
me, it feels like I’ve gone to heaven. A smile spreads over my face as the
warmth of the heated blanket calms my shaking muscles almost completely.
“You’re fucking adorable.”

“Yeah,
real adorable,” I mumble, thinking how busted up my body is. “This sucks.” It’s
best if my anxiety is kept inside. Evan has had enough to deal with. He shifts
himself to lie down along my good side.

“It
does,” he starts, settling into me. “But it’s only temporary. We’ll get through
this.”

“We
will?” I ask, tearing up.

“We
will. You and me,” he promises. It’s not hard to miss that he doesn’t form it
into a question like he usually does.

“You
and me?” If I don’t stop with the fucking tears, I’m going to gouge my damn
eyes out. What the hell is wrong with me?