Legalizing Prostitution: From Illicit Vice to Lawful Business (34 page)

A brochure produced by the Amsterdam police in the late 1990s contains a remarkable set of rules for visitors to the red-light district:

1. Have fun, but act in a normal manner.

2. Screaming and shouting. Fine 150 Guilder [$95].

3. Urinating in public. Fine 100G [$64].

4. Alcohol on the streets. Fine 80G. [$51]

5. Beware of pickpockets/robberies.

6. Prostitution, no pictures of the women.

7. Hard drugs are strictly forbidden.

8. Soft drugs [cannabis], not under 18.

Each item is followed by an explanatory paragraph. The prostitution paragraph reads,

If you visit one of the women, we would like to remind you, they are not always women. Don’t take pictures of the women, it might get you in trouble. Outside on the streets, don’t shout or use bad language towards these women. Show some respect. In case you have any problem with a girl or a pimp, don’t hesitate to ask a policeman/woman.
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These rules are periodically broken—especially the norms against shouting, public drinking, pickpocketing, taking photos, or verbally disparaging a window woman.

Based on my observations and other accounts,
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the vast majority of the people walking through the area are spectators rather than prospective customers. Most of the men cruise individually, others in groups of two or more. A minority cause trouble: 19 percent of window workers in Amsterdam say that they have been harassed by a client, though most of them say this has occurred rarely.
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Most of the men are quiet and simply walk through the area looking at the sights. For the most part, the men avoid eye contact with other men and do not speak to them, unless they are friends on a group outing. The stigma attached to clients makes most men wary of drawing attention to themselves. It is largely a scene of furtive window shopping, not buying.

For those who are interested in sex, the window district may be preferred over other venues because one can comparison shop with ease, viewing and interacting with sellers before making a decision. Brothels offer much more limited options, and escorts sometimes look quite different in person than on a website. Apart from those men who seek out a certain window provider because they have visited her before, many prospective clients will cruise the entire red-light district several times before selecting someone because, as one man put it, “the joy of walking around picking your favorite is immense fun.”
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The window model is also well suited to the opportunistic client, one who has not planned a sexual encounter ahead of time, whereas a liaison with an escort or visit to a brothel requires planning and may lack the element of spontaneity that some men find thrilling.

At the same time, visibility can determine whether a man partakes on any given occasion. Some men do not seem to mind entering a window room when onlookers are present, and others enjoy doing this in the presence of others especially when their choice is confirmed by other men. For example,
when one man left a window occupied by a very striking blonde, another man exclaimed, “She’s beautiful. I’m getting some of that!”; the departing man wrote online that hearing this affirmation of his selection “filled me with a sense of pride.” But other men are reluctant to approach a window if there are other people present and will wait until they disperse before making an approach. When a large crowd has gathered outside a window whose occupant is particularly “hot,” it is rare to see anyone enter her room. One client describes the nature of this dilemma: “Too many people, none was entering. Imagine having all those people waiting outside when you are [leaving]. I wanted to go, but it has to be relaxed.”
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Another man complained about the “tour groups who are gawping [
sic
] at the men-gawping-at-the-women.”
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Tour groups bother the workers as well. When a group clusters around a particular window, inadvertently intimidating potential clients, some providers will tell the tourists to leave. Finally, the high visibility of some window rooms is a deterrent for many prospective clients. The exposed windows along the main canal in the Wallen attract fewer customers than the less conspicuous windows along the narrow alleys. As a window owner told me, the “men can sneak in and sneak out” of these more hidden windows. Moreover, some men especially dislike the second-story windows along the main canal because they have to climb up a flight of stairs to reach the room, literally elevating their exposure to onlookers. I have rarely seen a man braving the spotlight in this way.

After clients complete their business and leave a window room, anywhere in this RLD, they typically walk away as quickly as possible, to minimize being seen by others. The desire to avoid such public visibility and the stigma associated with being (seen as) a “john” is one reason why some clients prefer more clandestine liaisons with escorts or in discreet brothels or even street prostitution, where the man is relatively invisible inside his car.

If tour groups are generally disliked by clients and providers alike, some people also dislike seeing families strolling through the RLD. As one client complained, “Call me old fashioned, but why do some parents think it’s a good idea to bring young kids to a RLD?”
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Others complain about visitors who are loud, drunk, or otherwise disorderly—especially on Friday and Saturday nights. On the weekends, Amsterdam is a prime destination for “stag parties”—groups of British men who arrive on a cheap flight, drink all day, and cause commotion. This is a major concern for local merchants, police, and city officials, as well as those sex workers who are accosted by these rowdy drunks. In addition to these disorderly, roving bands, I have observed some individual men calling women names, arguing with them, pounding
on their doors or windows, or staring and refusing to move away. On one occasion, a group of six male youths badgered a woman by repeatedly and loudly asking if she offered “golden showers” as she repeatedly asked them to leave (a golden shower involves urination). It is not uncommon to hear men collectively and vocally rate a woman’s appearance positively or negatively. I once observed a group of visibly drunk British men, one of whose members was talking to an overweight worker. His friends pulled him away, yelling, “You’ll be sorry. You’re too drunk to see that she’s ugly.” I have also witnessed men asking for sex without a condom and haggling over price, time, or services. The women have little patience for this and will quickly shut the door in the man’s face, though there is sometimes shouting or cursing as well.

On the flipside, on many occasions I have heard the parties exchanging pleasantries, flirting, or joking with each other. I have heard many men compliment a working woman, saying, “You’re so beautiful!” or “Hello, gorgeous!” or “You’re too hot for me!” Others stop in their tracks when they see someone that they consider a goddess, staring in stunned silence. After seeing one “bombshell,” a dazzled man said to his friends, “Wow! Wouldn’t you like to come home to that every night?” Some men ask a woman whom they have complimented to “perform” by dancing, touching herself, bending over, or showing a breast, and some women do this spontaneously if a desirable man lingers in front of her window. But from my observations, the performative dimension is limited in most cases to beckoning, flirtation, or limited erotic body language.

My observations are confirmed by clients’ postings on online discussion boards. While some of the online discussions mirror those of clients in other nations (e.g., reviews of specific providers, tales of their escapades, etiquette), other contributions are specific to window or brothel prostitution in the Netherlands. I draw on these sites here to give a more comprehensive picture of Amsterdam’s red-light districts, this time from the clients’ point of view. Seasoned posters educate novices on proper etiquette when approaching a window and on the way a client should act therein or at a Dutch brothel. And they criticize those who violate the rules. When one man posted his secretly recorded video of some of the window women, this was roundly condemned on the site, and another man was taken to task when he referred to one worker as a “bitch.”

As one might expect, some men seek a GFE with a particular provider, particularly if they become regular clients. In online message boards, clients describe nonsexual aspects of their experiences, and some seek advice regarding a specific woman. One poster, Farid747, asked about gifts:

I’m definitely one of Agnieszka’s best fans. … I want to offer her a gift as a sign of gratitude for the tremendous amount of joy she brings me. Don’t blame me for over-romanticizing her; of course I’m no fool, but it’s stronger than me, since [for] 2 weeks I can’t get her out of my mind. Have any of you ever offered a gift to a window girl? What kind of present do they like?

Responders recommended jewelry, among other things, and discussed their own gift giving:

DogsAfire: I took a baseball cap to Carla one time. She collects them. She modeled it for me (wearing nothing else) and looked really cute that way. … Anyway, whatever you do decide to give her, make sure that it is apparent that you put some thought into it. I dislike giving flowers simply because it shows very little consideration of the individual.

Farid747: Thank you all! … I guess a silk scarf Yves St. Laurent or a handbag Louis Vuitton would be nice. I could easily sacrify [sacrifice] 3 or 4 sessions just to offer her a beautiful gift. Anyway, most important is not the price, it’s the gesture. I wanna let her know how much I’m grateful to her for the joy that she brought, and I wanna let her know that she is so special to me
.
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Clients complain about a litany of things. Posters on online discussion boards criticize men who are rowdy, drunk, or disrespectful toward the women and revile the British stag groups. Others criticize the window type of prostitution or individual sex workers. Some lament the perfunctory nature of their sexual experiences behind the windows. One man wrote that what “you can expect from these women is an expensive rushed event,” and he characterized the window sector as a “production line”: “Get the customer in, get the customer out. Quality means nothing to these women.”
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What he does not mention is that clients can and do pay for longer sessions, say,
€
100 for 45 minutes, allowing for a less rushed experience. And some clients are
seeking
a quickie, just like street clients. Men report that some of the hottest women provide the worst services, because they see a large number of clients and therefore are less inclined to provide any particular man with a high-quality experience. Some workers also stand accused of “upselling”—that is, adding charges for every single act, such as removing a bikini top, allowing a man to touch breasts, cunnilingus, or more than one coital position. Other providers readily remove their clothes and allow a range of contact without
charging extra, and rushed or impersonal services are by no means universal behind Amsterdam’s windows, as clients’ message boards attest. When one poster claimed that a particular street had a “reputation” for “rip-off girls,” others offered contrary opinions based on their own experiences there.
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Another online discussion revolved around Romanian sex workers and their reputation for upselling. Some men reported a great experience with a Romanian, but others thought they were inclined to exploit clients. One stated, “Normally, we eschew bashing of national origins here [on this website] but, in this case, being 50% Romanian myself, I have to agree [that] they are by far the most dishonest girls I’ve ever met in Amsterdam and Alkmaar.”
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Message boards can be used to “name and shame” workers who stand accused of repeatedly engaging in bad behavior. For instance, one poster complained about a particular worker who asked him to negotiate inside the room, then closed and locked the door and demanded
€
50 to allow him to leave, threatening to call the police if he did not pay. As he fled the room, she reportedly called him a “motherfucka” and punched him in the back. A few other posters responded that they had the same experience with her—one of them likewise claimed that he was assaulted—while others expressed shock at her behavior. Regular posters indicated that this kind of conduct was unique to her, never having been reported on the site for anyone else. When a few men said that she should be slapped or kicked, they were warned not to resort to violence, while others suggested a “Hall of Shame” be created on the board to blacklist the worst providers.
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Novices are counseled by seasoned clients on how to assess a particular worker’s personality and thus the odds of having a satisfying experience: “If you see a girl who’s even a ‘maybe,’ try to talk to her! It not only gives you a chance to see better what she looks like, it also shows you what her window seat smells like (is she a smoker or perfumed?), as well as what she’ll sound like if/when she’s talking dirty to you. Important stuff!”
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Another says, “Pick out a woman who exhibits some personality. A friendly smile or sexy look in your direction indicate that the girl will give you a better time than a bored looking hooker will.”
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Others tell novices to determine, before entering the room, exactly what services are available, the cost of each, and how much time will be allotted. They are told not to disclose that they are first-timers, as that increases the chance of a rip-off. One newbie was informed that “complete rip-offs are fairly rare and upsells are not the end of the world—just tell them no several times.”
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One poster, Bookguy, offered a detailed list of “signs of greater levels of enjoyability” with a window woman, cues to look for when speaking to her at the door or after entering her room: