Let Me Love (8 page)

Instead of watching movies or playing our popcorn ‘getting to know you’ game, we, meaning Kailey, decides on the Life board game after me begging to play strip poker. She appears more comfortable from her fall, which makes me hope she’ll join me tonight at Jessa’s sister, Sam’s, party. We’d talked about going before the whole debacle last night, so I’m optimistic that she’s still up for it.

“Let’s make a bet?” I say, placing all the little buildings in their designated slots around the board.

“What?” she questions with a curiosity laced sigh.

“A kiss for every spin.” I wink, handing her the white car with a small plastic pink peg in it.

“That’s all?” she’s says, shocked that’s all I would request. Crap, should’ve asked for more.

“Do you want to up the ante?” I ask, placing my green car at the starting line with the blue peg in the driver’s seat.

“Well, first, my girl here can drive,” she says, moving her pink peg from the passenger spot to the driver’s side. I laugh. “Secondly, what do I get when I win?” I love her cockiness.

“Hey, baby, win or lose you can have anything you want—as long as it entails me.” I slyly smirk, and a giggle escapes from her.

After staring over at me for a few beats of the heart, she flirts right back, “I would expect nothing less.”

When I pick up my head from concentrating on the board and find her looking at me, I don’t think, I just move. Bending across the board, my lips land right on hers. Snaking my tongue in instantly, she quickly joins me and places her hand on the back of my head. Her fingernails scrap against my hairline while my hands remain planted on either side of her cheeks.

Reluctantly, I tear myself away from her, worried I may be rushing her. The fear that if I sleep with her now she’ll disappear from my life is very real. I smile when her bottom lip pouts out in displeasure that I ended it too soon for her liking. This is good; I need to keep her wanting me. So, I sit back, and we play the game, giving sexual innuendos back and forth. It’s been ages since I’ve flirted with someone and it’s exhilarating feeling those flutters in my stomach every time she turns me on with her words or an accidental brush of her fingers on mine.

Kailey, in fact, does win the game, leaving me in the dust with two carloads full of kids, a shitty job, and no money. I demand a rematch, but she reminds me I have a bet to ante up on first. Not about to miss that, I knock the board to the floor and grab her by her hips, bringing her onto my lap as I sit back down on the couch.

“Ouch,” she whimpers, and I quickly apologize for the abrupt movement to her sore back. “It’s okay, sometimes pain is worth it,” she replies with a hint of seduction.

Her hands find their now usual spot on my hairline, while mine clasp together and rest along the side of her hip, almost caging her in my arms. This time she bends down to me, making the first move and gradually brushing her moist lips against mine. Desperate to see what she has in store for us, I allow her to take the lead. Her tongue slowly parts my lips, but only enters slightly. Not allowing my own to join hers just yet, she moves her swirling tongue, teasing my lips until mine has no choice but to end this cat and mouse game.

Almost like a bolt of electricity strikes from the mere tip of our tongues colliding. Our mouths quickly become more frantic, while our hands remain firmly in place. It’s taking every ounce of restraint I possess not to lift her up and make her straddle me. I’m desperate for her to feel what she does to me, to feel the hard bulge in my pants up against her, even if it’s through pieces of fabric.

We must be on the same agenda because she slowly moves her legs on either side of my hips, her lips never leaving mine. She grinds into me harder, rubbing herself against my dick that’s begging me to release him. Grabbing her hips, I press her even closer and suck her bottom lip in between my teeth to nibble on before gradually kissing her chin. My one hand snakes up her back until I grab a few locks of her silky brown hair and lightly tug it back to get better access to her neck. Swiping my wet tongue up her neck, I encase my lips around her earlobe and suck it into my mouth.

Her moan only drives me harder to elicit those pleasured sounds out of her mouth. As gently as possible, I begin to move her down to the couch, so my hands can explore her body when the sound of a car engine brings us to a halt.

“Shit,” Kailey mumbles, sitting up and propping her feet up on the ottoman as though we weren’t just about to round second base.

I chuckle and follow her lead by sitting straight up, waiting for Uncle Clyde to come in most likely with his axe. We feel the cold air billow in before Holly and Clyde make their appearance with plastic filled grocery bags overflowing in their hands.

Holly stops dead in her tracks and coyly smiles over at us while Clyde gives us a quick hello and ventures into the kitchen. “Looks like we came home too soon,” Holly teases, raising her eyebrows, and then her vision lands on the game of Life strewn across the floor. Kailey’s face turns beet red, and I shake my head in amusement. “Sorry, guys,” she jokingly offers her condolences, and then continues on her way to the kitchen, giggling.

When I finally hear the ripples of the bags being unpacked and the cans being put away, I turn toward a very embarrassed Kailey. “I guess, I should get going. Are you coming with me tonight?” Praying she says yes, I kiss her lips quickly to hopefully seal the deal.

“Yes,” she mumbles against mine. I suppress the shout of joy that wants to bellow out of me. I think we just turned a corner.

––––––––

T
he van stops in front of Jessa’s sister, Sam’s house. She’s having a huge party tonight, and since we’re always up for a college kegger, we all graciously accepted the invitation. Grant and Jessa have their hot date tonight, so they’re coming later, which will be a good thing. It’ll allow Kailey to see how in love they are with each other once they arrive. After the plans I heard Grant had for them, there’s no doubt Jessa will be on cloud nine, bragging about it to all the girls.

As I grasp Kailey’s hand, Dex tosses his overnight bag over his shoulder. He winks when he catches me smirking at him. He definitely picked up those self-esteem pieces pretty fast after I stole Kailey. The same night we got in from Western, he and Sam started eyeing each other. Not sure Jessa’s noticed, and I’m itching to be there when she finds out. No doubt Dex will get his ass handed to him by a spunky little blonde.

Sam opens the door before we ring the doorbell, obviously just as excited about our arrival as Dex. Once she gives a brief hello and a quick tour, she and Dex disappear into the bedroom while the four of us grab a few beers and sit down.

“Remember those days,” Sadie says, squeezing Brady’s thigh.

“Those days?” he scrunches his eyebrows at her while taking a sip of his water.

“You know? When we couldn’t keep our hands off one another?”

“You have to be shittin’ me?” spills out of me in as much confusion as Brady appears to be in.

“Babe, my hands never leave your body,” he remarks, pulling her into his lap. “I’m sure there’s a spare bedroom somewhere around here.” He over dramatizes his head turning left and right.

“You don’t need a bedroom,” I begin to joke, but quickly stop myself, so Kailey doesn’t get the wrong idea.

“Yeah, Trey’s never needed one,” Kailey adds, and I stare up at Brady not sure if it’s a slam or a joke on her part. Sadie bites the inside of her cheek, wondering the same.

“Isn’t that the truth? All we need is a corner,” Brady laughs and, luckily, Kailey does to. Unfortunately, I’m not too much of a fan of being the butt of a joke, especially one that is a sore spot between Kailey and me.

“Hey,” she squeezes my hand. I peer down at her next to me and out of the corner of my eye, I notice Brady and Sadie attempt to leave quietly. “I was joking. I’m sorry,” she continues, her green eyes reflecting remorse for her words.

Bending down close to her, her body stiffens against mine. “Things change—people change,” I whisper before kissing her. Not sure why I’m suddenly ashamed of every careless fuck I’ve had. I guess, it’s my need for her to feel like I’m worth something. When in actuality, I’m not.

“I shouldn’t have said that. I’m sorry,” she apologizes again.

“You can’t be sorry when you speak the truth.” I stand up, not able to handle these damn emotions any longer. I leave her on the couch without looking back her way. When I get into the kitchen, Sadie rolls her eyes at me and leaves the room to join Kailey, I assume.

“You finally found your match,” Brady jokes, chomping on some Doritos he found on the table.

Reaching in to grab one. “Yeah, I guess.” I shrug my shoulders, searching the room for something stronger. When I spot the bottle of Absolute, my hand reaches, but Brady grabs it away.

“You don’t need it,” he tells me, keeping it hostage as though I’m some fucking alcoholic.

“What the hell? Give me the damn bottle.” My voice rising in agitation.

“Deal with what’s going on instead of numbing the shit,” Brady says, handing me the bottle.

I debate his words and with a huff, refill my red Solo cup instead. The hard stuff won’t make this guilt disappear. I lean against the doorframe and look at Kailey laughing with Sadie in the front room. I can’t help but wonder if they’re laughing at me. “Relax, man,” Brady clasps my shoulders, “just go with it and see what happens,” he reminds me.

“Like you did with Sadie?” I chuckle, and he joins me in laughter, remembering how he had me stalking the campus for weeks to find her.

“You’ve made your point.” He continues on his way to the girls and sits next to Sadie, wrapping his arm around her shoulders.

Watching from the other room, Kailey laughs with ease and comfortableness at some story Sadie’s telling her. I pray like hell it isn’t some embarrassing fact about me. Like how I have a habit of drinking out of the orange juice container, or how I left that porn in the DVD player that one time. A small chuckle escapes envisioning Sadie’s face when she turned on the television that day. I can still hear her screaming my name.

Kailey glances my way, as though she senses my eyes on her. She’s beautiful. Her lips turn up as her eyes remain focused on mine. Turning back to Sadie and Brady, she says something before standing up and walking my way. Our eyes stay on each other the whole time she’s making her way over to me. The anticipation to have her in my arms and her lips on mine grows with every step closer she comes.

The back of her hand brushes down my cheek and her green irises stare into mine with complete forgiveness. “Hi,” she quietly says.

“Hi,” I repeat, not able to tear my eyes away from her. Her hand continues down, allowing her fingers to graze down my lips, making it so tempting to bite at her fingers.

“You scare me,” she admits. I’m not sure why she’s picking now to divulge her hidden fears. “It was wrong of me to make that joke when you’ve been nothing short of a gentleman to me.” Her apology grips my stomach. I can’t quite believe she gives a shit about me.

“You make me—different,” I reveal in the middle of this foreign house. I’m admitting feelings I never thought I would harbor inside of myself again.

“Good,” she says, inching up on her toes to kiss me. Not allowing her to escape, I turn us and press her against the wall. My lips and tongue consume her, trying to impart every weakness she brings over me.

A slap on my back and a whistle announces Dex and Sam’s emergence out of her bedroom. Reluctantly, I tear myself away from Kailey, and she smiles up at me as she takes in a deep breath. I love seeing her expression when I stop kissing her, it’s like she’s disappointed that it ended. “We’ll finish this later,” I softly say, and she nods.

The rest of the night goes smoothly, except for running into Jessa’s ex, which Grant handled with nothing but benevolence. As for Kailey, she held my hand the whole night, letting me steal kisses and move her onto my lap. We were a couple, if only for the remainder of our time in Colorado.

Our last night, the reluctance to drop her off at her aunt and uncle’s has me driving slower than normal. My hand has been warming inside hers the whole trip, and I’m not ready for it to become cold again. The few glances we’ve made toward one another tells me she feels the same way. I just wish, she would give me her whole self; it’s obvious she’s holding something back.

I put the van in park and turn toward her. “I hate that we go back tomorrow,” I tell her, fear rushing over me that this could be my last time alone with her. She hasn’t been reserved, but she has obligations back home. Ones she clearly doesn’t want me a part of.

“I know,” she softly says, staring down at our entwined hands. She takes her other hand and rubs it on top of ours. “Do you remember what I said this morning? I can’t promise you—,” she begins the usual rant.

“I remember.” Although I’m hoping like hell something changed her mind tonight. She picks up her head, and I see a tear welling up, about to escape her eye. “Hey.” I reach my hand to her cheek, but she quickly turns toward the window.

“I’m sorry, Trey. I don’t know what’s wrong with me.” She wipes her own tear away, sitting up straighter in the seat.

“You have nothing to be sorry for. I don’t understand, Kailey. Why are you crying?” I tentatively ask, knowing if I push to far she’ll run.

“When I get back home, I don’t have time like this. I barely have enough time to study and attend classes, but... I’ll miss this.” I notice another tear fall down her cheek, landing on her nylon coat.

“You can trust me,” I say, leaning closer. “What’s back home?” I’m eager to know what keeps her so closed off.

“Just family pressures.” She looks up at me finally. Placing my palm against her cheek, I display a clear concern for her and what her problems are. But before we can go into it any further, she leans over and smashes her lips against mine. Soon she’s on top of me, straddling me with her back against the steering wheel.

She’s so similar to me, masking her problems with anything but what it is. I allow her to hide, and we make out in the car for a while. By the time I have to leave, the sun is about to come up. Walking her to the door, I wrap her in my arms, kissing her with every ounce of me. Hoping it pushes her to continue this between us. Her last words aren’t what I hoped for.