Lethal Temptations (Tempted #5) (42 page)

I didn’t even care if he told me how he felt.

If he didn’t say a word.

Just knowing he was listening was enough.

Daniela and I grabbed a coffee and went to our next class. I pretended to be paying attention but my mind was elsewhere, busy dreaming of what could’ve been. It doesn’t look like we will get another chance at making our story work. If Brandon dies, Blackie’s sentence changes and he’s looking at murder.

I’m waiting for my father to give the green light and have the lawyer escort me into the station so I can make a formal statement but talking to my father these days is a struggle. He won’t even look at me and has made it very clear that talking about Blackie is out of the question.

A part of me wishes we never hid from him, maybe if he had gotten a chance to see us for himself he’d know it wasn’t something to frown upon. Sometimes the heart rules and if you’re lucky it lasts. I think if my father would’ve seen us follow our hearts straight into each other’s arms he might be a little more lenient. If he saw the ease of our relationship, the stolen moments that sparked a fire in our hearts, or if he would’ve seen us smiling whenever we were together than maybe Jack Parrish would understand Leather and Lace.

No man will ever be good enough for me in his eyes but no man cared more about me than Blackie, even before we were anything, when we both thought we were nothing…even then we were still something.

The other part of me is happy we kept our time to ourselves. For a short while we were on top of the world. All the sorrows and regrets of his past faded away and the trials and tribulations of my mind disappeared.

I fell harder than I thought was possible and as I fell Blackie swooped in, claiming my heart. He gave me the broken pieces of his heart and with every kiss and every smile he asked me to put him back together.

So what went wrong? He loved me. I know he did, hell even Riggs saw it. So why did he wound me with his words and break my heart? Was it because he didn’t have enough faith in himself? He should know by now I have enough faith in him for the both of us. He should know that he didn’t have to prove his worth to me. I believe when you love someone as hard and as fierce as I love Blackie, there is no reason to prove anything other than your commitment to that person. I believe, God creates a second half of your soul and puts it into someone else, if you’re lucky you cross paths with that person and get to be one half of a great love story. You become complete and a full heart and a mended soul is all the proof you need. You begin to write an epic love story, one you never saw coming but will always be thankful for.

The words come freely.

The actions speak for themselves.

The love evolves without trying.

It’s a rare form of beauty.

Only the lucky ones get to experience.

I was lucky for a little while.

Then my luck ran out.

But I had the story scribed into my heart and that would never run from me.

My phone vibrated on top of my desk, pulling me away from the heartbreak and into the present creating a ruckus and all eyes turned around to see. I stared at the screen and saw it was an unknown caller.

“Miss Parrish, do you need to take that?” My professor chastised.

“Nope,” I smiled sheepishly, turning my phone on silent before I flipped it over and laid the screen against the desk. “I’m sorry.”

I rolled my eyes at my classmates that continued to stare at me before I glanced down and pretended to take notes.

I had no fucking clue what was going on but hey, I faked the good student like nobody’s business and continued to doodle until the professor called class.

I grabbed my books, shoved them in my bag and followed everyone else out of the room. I turned the ringer back on as I walked down the hall and noticed the alert that I had a voicemail. I walked with Daniela into the parking lot, she went her way and I went mine. When I was inside the car, I pulled out the phone and stared at the screen, my thumb hovered over it before I played back the voicemail.

“Lace, it’s me,” Blackie’s voice filled my car and my heart. I heard the gasp escape my lips as he paused, forcing me to check and see if that was the end of the message.

“I’m…I don’t know where to start. I guess I’m calling because I want to hear your voice. I want to hear with my own ears you’re okay. All right, well I’ll try reaching you again later if they let me use the phone.”

Another pause.

“I miss you, Angel. I miss you like crazy and I keep picturing your pretty little face. So fucking pretty,” his voice trailed off and then I heard him clear his throat. “Hang in there, girl. I’ll try and call again, hopefully I’ll catch you,” he said before ending the voicemail.

Chapter Thirty-five

There comes a time in life when you’ve tried all you can and have no choice but to look up to a higher power to guide you. It’s usually when you’ve made a couple of wrong turns and you’ve lost your way. You have no idea where the fuck you are and don’t know where to go from here and instead of winging it you look for signs.

I didn’t have to look too hard for my sign. It came right after I made the phone call to Lacey and she didn’t pick up. Her sweet voice filled my ears, my soul and the emptiness inside of me since I pushed her away. I contemplated hanging up and not leaving a message at all but I couldn’t do it. I physically couldn’t do it anymore.

I folded.

The dealer had one card left, and it wasn’t a queen.

I had already passed that one up.

I left the message and now I’m left regretting I didn’t put it all out there for her. I told her I missed her and that I wanted her to hang in there but I should’ve told her I loved her. I should’ve told her I made a mistake and I’ll spend every day regretting the one day when I pushed her away. It was foolish, so fucking foolish. I have never doubted my ability to protect her, not once, not since I vowed to Jack I’d do whatever it takes to make sure she was always okay. I gave my brother, peace of mind when they closed the cell doors on his ass, I gave him my word I’d always put her before me.

When my truck blew up, and we had to put the club on lockdown I volunteered to grab Lacey because I trusted myself with her life more than I trusted Jack.

That’s a fact.

It’s funny what you realize when all you have is three walls and prison bars to stare at all day…your mind is constantly working.

I could’ve taken care of Boots. I could’ve put that motherfucker to sleep and avoided all this shit but, I didn’t think. I was too wrapped up in the consequences, worried about the club and all the drama we already had brewing with the Chinese.

For the first time in my life I had something I was scared of losing. Never felt that way before. Not even with Christine. It fucked me up, and I lost my way.

I fucked up the rewrite.

“Let’s go Petra,” the C.O. called, jingling his keys against the metal bars.

I lifted my head off my cot and looked over at him as he unlocked my cell.

“Let’s go where?”

“Visitor,” he muttered. “Well come on, I don’t have all day,” he hissed. I threw my legs over the side of the bed and rose to my feet. No one’s come up to see me since Jack visited two weeks ago. I at least expected a visit from Pipe or Wolf if not to keep me in the loop with the club than to rip me a new asshole for my affair with Lacey. I’m sure Jack’s spreading that shit like wild fire, as he plots my demise.

I don’t want to believe that he’ll leave me here to rot. I want to think that despite everything he remembers we’re brothers by choice, and I’ve always had his back and always will. I didn’t plan on falling in love with his daughter. I didn’t plan ahead and he of all people knew that. He’s the one who has pleaded with me frequently to find my heart and live again.

Careful what you wish for Bulldog.

Shouldn’t have given me her life.

He made her mine without even realizing it.

He put her in front of me and asked me to live again.

I listened to him, opened my eyes and there she was.

An angel tempting the devil.

I was buzzed into the visitor’s room and scanned the perimeter searching for the reaper and whoever was wearing it. I glanced over my shoulder at the C.O.

“I see no one I know,” I told him, turning around. He placed hand on my chest and tipped his chin over my shoulder.

“Look again,” he ordered.

I turned around and this time when I searched the room I didn’t look for leather and mayhem, I searched until I found my queen.

Eyes dark as the night met mine.

All the noise faded.

And the people crowding the room seemed to disappear.

It was just her.

My angel.

I started for her as she pushed back her chair and slowly rose to her feet.

Face to face.

Here we were again.

Leather and Lace.

Just when you think you’re done. That you’ve lost everything and you have nothing left, nowhere else to go, that higher ground shakes things around and gives you a new path.

I was staring my path in the eyes and the future never looked so bright.

I was a man behind bars, with no release date, not even sentenced yet but, still a man who had a future.

That pretty face was my future.

“What’re you doing here?” I asked, finding my voice as we stood across from one another with the table between us. Her eyes scanned me, zeroing in on my inmate number before finding mine again.

“I’m visiting my favorite Knight,” she whispered, offering me a smile as she cocked her head to the side. “What do you think I’m doing here? I miss you.”

I closed my eyes as her words punched me in the gut.

She had no fucking idea how much I missed her.

No fucking clue.

“I miss you too,” I rasped, opening my eyes.

“They told me I wasn’t allowed to touch you,” she murmured, eyeing the guards positioned around the perimeter of the room.

I followed her gaze before turning back to her and shrugged my shoulders.

“Yeah, you might slip me something,” I explained as I let my eyes travel down her body and back up to her face. I could stare at that face for the rest of my life and never want another.

“You look good, Lace,” I said. “Real good,” I tipped my chin toward the chair beside her.

“Thanks,” she said, pulling out the chair. She took a seat and raised an eyebrow waiting for me to do the same. I felt a muscle twitch and my lips curve slightly as I took the seat in front of her.

I placed my palms flat against the table and kept my head down as my eyes bore into hers.

Come on girl.

Follow my lead.

She kept her eyes trained on mine and mimicked my stance, placing both hands flat against the table.

That’s my girl.

“I told you father something but I should’ve told you first,” I said, straightening up but kept my hands firmly where they were. “I should’ve told you a long time ago, should’ve told you when you came to the Dog Pound but instead I was cruel to you. Time you got the truth, girl.”

“Then give it to me,” she coaxed.

“Every word I said that night was a lie. You stopped being Jack’s daughter a long time ago. At first I didn’t want to see it, I didn’t want to see you but it was inevitable. You were created for me and only me. I told you were nothing more than...,” I stopped, shook my head unable to repeat the harsh lie and blew out a breath before I looked back at her. “You’re everything,” I whispered.

I caught the sheen of fresh tears in her eyes before I diverted mine down to her hands and saw her curl her fingers. She fought to keep the stance we were both holding, itching to move them and lift them to her face.

“Keep your hands flat,” I whispered.

She blinked, and the tears slipped from the corners of her eyes.

“You okay?”

She nodded.

“It’s coming,” I teased, winking at her.

My sweet Lace, full of life and so much strength left behind those dark eyes.

“I love you Lacey,” I whispered the words and gave her my smile, inching my hands closer to hers.

“I’m sorry you’re hearing it like this and not some grand way. I’m sorry I let you think for one second I didn’t give a damn.”

“Stop,” she croaked.

I furrowed my brows and stilled my hands.

“Say it again.”

My lips quirked.

“I love you, girl. Only you. Forever you,” I swore.

She smiled at me, making me forget she would walk away and I would go back to my cell.

“I love you too,” she said through her tears. “I knew you loved me,” she whispered. “In my heart I knew I had your love and when my mind told me it was a lie I fought against it.”

“You keep fighting,” I interjected. “You hear me? You walk out of here today and you keep fighting that shit, never let that maker win,” I stressed.

“I’m guessing my dad told you?”

I nodded.

“He was vague. You want to clue me in?”

I watched her look down, spread her fingers a part and slowly slide them closer to the middle of the table before she let them be.