Read Letter From a Rake: Destiny Romance Online
Authors: Sasha Cottman
She took a step back and held up her evening gloves. ‘Mustn’t forget these, otherwise we would both have a lot to explain.’
As she started to put her gloves on, Alex took hold of her hands and stopped her. He slowly pulled off the glove she had placed on her left hand and after taking the other glove, he put them both into his coat pocket. He took her hands in his. With his hands placed over hers, his signet ring with the Strathmore family crest formed a crown at the top of their hands. The gold horse and stars set in black onyx represented the wealth and power his family wielded. They both stared at the ring.
Neither of them spoke.
He raised her hands to his lips and placed a tender kiss on her fingertips. She shuddered and he felt her fingers tremble. As she lifted her head, he waited for the moment when their eyes would meet.
When they did, he found himself staring into two magnificent deep-blue gems. Framed by long, dark lashes, Millie’s eyes drew him inexorably in. He cupped his hand under her chin, bent his head and placed a tentative kiss on her lips.
In that brief moment he felt the soft warmth of her lips.. His heart pounded in his chest. He had kissed his fair share of women before, but never had his heart been involved. This was a new and heady experience, for which he had waited his whole life.
He pulled away, just enough to break the bond and, seeing that she had her eyes closed, decided to risk a second kiss. This time, he concentrated all his efforts on remembering the rules of kissing a young miss.
First, find a willing girl. He gave his imaginary checklist a tick. He appeared to have that sorted. Then find somewhere where you won’t be disturbed – these things required patience and absolute attention. Besides, if you got caught with the wrong girl, you might find yourself before her angry father, followed swiftly by a march up the aisle. Discretion was of the utmost importance.
He was pleased that they were alone for their first kiss and unlikely to be disturbed. To woo Millie properly would take time. He had to be certain he had won her heart before he offered for her.
The spectre of her desire to return to India still loomed over him. She had to want to stay with him in England, not be forced by circumstance or have pressure brought to bear by others. If they were discovered and forced to marry, she would never forgive him. Life would be impossible for him if Millie became his wife and she regretted their marriage.
He had to win her – heart and soul. By kissing her now, he was making his intent clear. From this moment on, he would begin his campaign and court her openly. A visit to her father would be in order first thing tomorrow morning.
He deepened the kiss, placing more pressure on her lips. When her lips parted slightly, he took her top lip and kissed it. She moaned. His whole body hardened. Then, emboldened by her response, he speared his hand into her hair, pulling her closer to him.
She let out a gasp of surprise as he took her mouth more fiercely. This was so much more than anything he had ever experienced before.
His tongue swept past her lips and into her mouth. He felt Millie’s hands on his chest and he steeled himself for the moment when she pushed him away. But, to his immense relief, she took hold of the lapels of his coat and pulled him in closer. He groaned.
She wants this as much as I do, thank God.
Her response was just as he had always hoped it would be; she held nothing back as she gave her mouth up to him. Holding tightly onto his coat, her lips soft and pliant, she demanded everything he could give.
His right hand drifted down to her hip and settled on the curve that had filled his dreams for so many nights. His mind and body fought with one another as he struggled against stepping forward and pressing himself hard against her. If he did there would be no mistaking the rock-hard erection that was throbbing beneath his coat.
She was an innocent. He knew if she suspected she was in any real danger from him, the evening would end badly and his campaign to win her would suffer a major setback.
The time would come when she would understand what happened between a man and a woman, but that was not now. That moment would be planned down to the last intimate and minute detail. She would have willingly accepted his marriage proposal and an engagement ring would be sparkling on her hand when he first took her to his bed.
The clock in the front hall chimed.
They slowly drew apart. Millie brought a finger to her swollen, red lips. The stamp of his passion was there for all to see. Alex reached into his pocket and handed Millie her gloves. She smiled and with obvious effort put them on.
‘I love you,’ he said.
She shook her head. ‘No, you don’t,’ she whispered. She took a step back.
The moment was over.
His heart sank. She didn’t take him seriously. He could see that to her mind, she was just another of his sister’s friends he had toyed with, just one more. All those stupid, thoughtless games he had played last season with Lucy’s friends now came back to haunt him.
She pushed past him and climbed the stairs. Alex followed, and as they reached the front entrance he took hold of her arm.
‘Millie, I am serious with regard to my affections for you, I —’
He stopped. Angry voices were at the front door.
As the door flew open, Alex let go of Millie and stepped back from her. He caught her eye and shook his head. ‘Nothing happened,’ he whispered.
They both turned to see Charles, David and Lucy standing on the threshold. Charles stormed into the room and took Millie by the arm. ‘What the devil are you playing at?’ he roared at her.
David stepped between Alex and Millie and gave his younger brother a hard shove in the chest. Alex staggered backwards.
Millie began to cry. ‘Nothing – nothing happened,’ she wailed.
Alex attempted to take a step forward, but David held him by the shoulders.
‘We came to have a cup of tea, nothing else. We were just about to head back to the ball,’ Alex said.
Charles looked to his sister, who stood shaking her head. ‘Nothing happened, Lord Brooke had some chai tea and he offered to share some with me. You can check the pot in the kitchen if you like,’ she pointed downstairs. ‘I’m not lying.’
‘Stay there,’ Charles ordered her. He returned a moment later holding the teapot in his hand, and showed it to the others. ‘It’s still hot; she’s telling the truth, or at least that part of it.’
David nodded. He grabbed Alex by the arm and began to drag him towards the main staircase. Alex pulled away and reached for Charles. He tugged on Charles’s jacket sleeve.
‘Please, you must understand, nothing happened, I would never do anything to risk your sister’s reputation. I know what we did was a bit rash, but it was only a cup of tea.’
Charles pushed Alex’s hand away with a violent swing of his arm. ‘David, you had better take him away this instant, or I shall not be held accountable for the bloody thrashing I give your brother,’ he bellowed.
Charles turned and held out his hand to Millie. ‘We are leaving. I shall deal with you when we get home. In the meantime you might think of twenty reasons why I should not tell Mama and Papa what you did tonight.’
‘But you promised,’ stammered Lucy.
Charles took a deep breath and glared at Millie. ‘Yes, Lady Lucy, forgive me. Millie, do you know what I promised?’
‘No,’ his sister replied, as she continued to sob.
‘I promised not to beat Lord Brooke to a pulp if you came quietly and did not make a fuss. I also agreed not to tell anyone about this evening and your foolish little expedition to the house of an unmarried man. Though right now I am so angry that I would quite happily give Brooke a pounding and then go home and wake Papa to tell him the reason why.’
Millie dried her tears on the back of her glove and gave a silent nod. She would go quietly.
‘Millie,’ Alex said, but she refused to look at him. He knew she would think him a coward, one who used his sister’s friends and then bolted at the first sign of trouble.
If she had not thought him a cad before tonight, then this evening’s events would have left her in no doubt as to his lack of character. The kiss and its aftermath had been bad enough, but now all he could see was the almost insurmountable task he faced of trying to win Millie’s trust again, let alone her love.
As the Ashton siblings headed for the door, he watched with a sinking heart as Lucy stepped forward and faced Millie.
‘I thought you were different,’ she said, tears filling her eyes. ‘I thought you liked me for me, but you are just like
all
the others. I should have known it when the two of you spent the dance lesson giggling and whispering to each other. You used me to get to my brother.’
Lucy shot Alex a look of despair before turning back to Millie. ‘I shall ask Mr Roberts to send his card to your mother; she can arrange for you to have your future dance lessons elsewhere. Please do not bother to call on me at the house any more – I shall not be at home to you. I wish you success with the forthcoming season.’
‘Lucy,’ Alex pleaded. ‘It’s not her fault, she did nothing wrong.’
Lucy shook her head, and held up her hand refusing to hear his words. ‘You know the effect you have on vulnerable girls and yet you still play your pathetic little games with them.’ She turned to David. ‘When you are ready would you please take me home?’
Charles thanked David for helping to locate his sister and they shook hands. He took Millie firmly by the arm and ushered her out the front door.
It took only until the end of the first block for Charles to start in on Millie. After pushing her roughly into the carriage and slamming the door loudly behind him, Charles sat down on the bench opposite her. He seethed with rage.
‘Nothing happened,’ Millie said.
Her brother closed his eyes and held a hand to his forehead. ‘Nothing needs to have happened, as you well know. If anyone finds out, you will be ruined. You don’t seem to understand that a young woman’s reputation is the only thing she has of value within the
haute ton
. If you lose that, you might as well go and live in a nunnery,’ he replied.
He began to suck deep breaths in and out at a furious rate. Millie could see he was trying to control his temper.
‘The only reason you are not currently betrothed to Lord Brooke is because I agreed with his brother that we should not have to be continually reminded of how reckless the two of you were. You should be sitting there quietly counting your blessings that your older brother takes care of you. Others would have seized the opportunity to push their sister into marriage with a lunatic who will one day inherit a title and a sizeable fortune.’
‘He is not mad.’
‘Then pray tell me, Millie, what rational man invites a girl of your social standing out into the night and expects no repercussions? I would suggest only one who is destined for Bedlam would think that way. Besides, I have seen him ride. The man is seriously lacking in common sense.’
She would get nowhere arguing with Charles this night. The worst thing was he was right. She had risked everything by going with Alex to his house. She also knew that if anyone found out about their kiss, she would be the Marchioness of Brooke in no time. And no matter whose fault it was, she couldn’t face the prospect that if they were forced to marry, Alex would be humiliated and she would bear the blame.
At least they had got their story straight, and both had held to it fast. The first thing she would do when she got home would be to retire to her bedroom to hide her face. She sat back into the darkened corner of the carriage so Charles could not see the tell-tale marks of Alex’s passion on her lips.
In the panic that Charles would look closely at her face, she had forced herself to cry when confronted by him. Having to lie to him only made things worse.
‘You are not going to tell anyone, are you?’ she ventured.
Charles’ temper flared once more. ‘Your behaviour has been scandalous. If you don’t see the game the Marquess of Brooke is playing with you then that much-vaunted intelligence of yours has deserted you.’
Millie took a breath and tried to respond, but she couldn’t find the words.
One moment she had been held fast in Alex’s arms, revelling in a kiss far more passionate than anything she had ever imagined, and the next she had been faced with her worst nightmare. Now as she sat in the carriage, her hand touching her bruised lips, she could still smell the trace of his cologne on her skin.
‘Well?’ Charles continued, stirring Millie from her thoughts. ‘Don’t you care about Lucy? Could you not see how upset she was, how devastated she is to have found out that you are the same as all the other girls? As for me, and my position in society, you could not give a fig, could you? You care only for yourself.’
He sat back in his seat and, pulling up the window blind, looked out into the night.
‘I shall conceal your behaviour this evening, Millie, but if you ever do anything so foolish again, I shall stand back and leave you to your fate.’
Ashamed.
There was no other word to describe how Millie felt the following morning as she sat glum-faced at the breakfast table, staring at her plate.
Adding to her discomfort was the presence of her brother and father at the now-regular morning meal. After the welcome-home ball at Ashton House, her mother had decided it was vital that they all spend time together to maintain their familial ties, so she had decreed that, until the start of the season proper, the whole family would share the same table for at least one meal a day. Now, instead of being able to stay in bed until mid-morning each day, Millie was compelled to rise early and sit down to breakfast long before she could face the prospect of food.
Most mornings her brother would hastily make a sandwich on his plate, wrap it in a clean handkerchief and head out the door to go riding in Hyde Park. This morning Charles sat at the table, with a large plate piled high with toast, black pudding and eggs before him. It was clear he was not going anywhere early this morning. Another consequence of the previous night had been the end of his daily rides with Alex.
When Charles asked her to pass a plate of kippers, she handed them to him without meeting his gaze. She was afraid to look at him, worried that he would still wear the look of disapproval he had worn all the way home in the carriage last night. His wrath had been truly frightening.
By the time they had finally reached home, he had worked himself up into such a lather that when the carriage slowed to a halt, he had flung the door open, jumped out onto the pavement and gone inside the house before Millie had time to rise from her seat.
At least he had kept his word about not revealing the events of last night to their parents. After the embarrassing situation she had placed her brother in, she had to be grateful for any small mercies.
She could not bring herself to imagine the scene that must have followed their departure from the house in Bird Street. With Lucy present, the brothers would not dare to have come to blows, but the possibilities of what might have occurred after David had returned from Strathmore House now played on her mind.
As for poor Lucy, Millie had proved beyond a doubt that her now-former friend had had every reason to be worried.
What a mess.
Last night had been a complete disaster and it was all her fault. She should have said no to Alex, no matter how much he pleaded, but she had yielded to temptation. Now her brother was furious with her, David Radley more than likely thought her a loose woman and Lucy was left to mourn the loss of yet another friendship.
She picked up a piece of toast from the rack and slowly buttered it, then placed it on her plate. She shook her head and pushed the plate away; the mere sight of food made her feel nauseous.
‘You haven’t eaten a thing, Millie darling. Are you feeling a little off-colour? I did tell you to have a care as to what you eat at other people’s parties,’ her mother said.
‘I am fine, Mama, it’s just a little early for food,’ she muttered. She blinked hard and let out a sigh.
‘You don’t sound fine at all my dear. What is the matter?’ Violet pressed.
‘Leave her be,’ her father interjected.
Across the table his gaze met his wife’s and he shook his head; James could not abide tears at the breakfast table. Violet would have to wait until after he had left for East India House to speak privately with their daughter.
‘So, what are your plans for the day, Charles?’ James asked, changing the subject.
Millie gave a silent prayer of thanks to her father and his sensitivity. He would be aware that she was holding on tight to her emotions. One careless word and she would dissolve in a flood of tears.
‘I thought I might pay a visit to Tattersalls today, and have a look at a pair of horses Uncle has recommended for me. They come up for auction later this week, so I will take the stable master from Ashton House with me and get him to look them over. Uncle said he will purchase them for me and stable them until my handling of English roads is up to scratch,’ Charles replied.
James finished off the last of his tea and wiped his lips with a napkin. Then, placing it on the table, he stood up and prepared to leave.
‘That is a very generous gift. But you know he does not have to buy them for you; I am happy to give you the money to buy them yourself.’ He walked around to his wife and, bending down, gave her a farewell kiss. She gave him a warm smile and her eyes sparkled when he whispered something no one else could hear in her ear.
Charles nodded his head. ‘I have to admit that while it is exciting for him to offer such lavish gifts, I am a tad uncomfortable with the whole business.’
His father planted a brief kiss on Millie’s head, but otherwise left her alone. ‘I shall have a word with him. You might inherit the title someday, but you are my son and heir, so if anyone is going to buy you a horse it should be me. I didn’t spend all those years in India salvaging the family fortunes only to be relegated to a secondary role upon my return. I shall drop by and see your uncle later today.’
After Mr Ashton had departed for the office, Charles helped his mother hobble down to the main sitting room, where she planned to spend the day resting her swollen ankle and catching up on correspondence. Millie knew that eventually her mother would send for her and begin to ask awkward questions.
Charles soon returned and after dismissing the footman, closed the hallway door behind him. Millie picked up her teacup and took a small sip. As she held her breath he walked around the table and took the seat next to her. He took hold of her trembling hand and, leaning over, planted a kiss on her cheek.
‘It will be all right, Millie. We have managed to avoid a public scandal. The Radley siblings are as anxious as we are to keep this quiet. Just don’t tell Mama anything of last night,’ he said.
Millie nodded her head. ‘I was thinking what to tell Mama, and I think a version of the truth is the best,’ she replied sadly.
Charles gripped her hand. ‘No. You cannot tell her you were alone with Alex; she would make you marry him.’
She turned and gave him a weary look. ‘I am not that stupid.’
Her brother raised his eyebrows.
‘Granted, I did some foolish things last night, but I am not about to tell Mama that I was alone with Alex in his house and that you and David discovered us. I am simply going to tell her that Lucy and I have had a falling out, which, sadly, is the truth.’
Charles sat back in his chair and ran his hands through his hair; she hoped it was a look of relief that now appeared on his face, but she sensed there was still lingering frustration. After last night, things had changed between them. She suspected he no longer trusted her. It pained her to have disappointed him.
‘I am sorry about last night, Charles. I had no right to do as I did; you have every reason to be angry with me. You were right, I was stupid and selfish and I let my girlish infatuation for Lord Brooke cloud my judgement. It will not happen again, I promise.’
He raised his eyebrows once more and she let out a little giggle. She reached across and gave him a punch on the arm.
‘Stop it, this is serious,’ she said.
He rolled his eyes. ‘I know it is; why do you think I was so riled up last night? I am glad you finally realise how close to ruin you came. Of course, the biggest problem at the moment is how you are going to make amends with Lady Lucy. She was dreadfully upset when we left. You must speak to her this morning and try to put things right.’
Millie slowly nodded her head. While a major catastrophe had been narrowly averted, there were still injured bystanders.
‘I don’t know if she will see me – she made it clear our friendship was at an end. Will you accompany me to Strathmore House this morning? I may get further if you are in tow.’
Charles pursed his lips and then let out a long, tired sigh. ‘Yes, the longer you leave it the worse things will be. I have a couple of errands to run this morning – you can come with me. When they are done, we will call in at Strathmore House and see if we can repair the damage.’
‘Thank you,’ Millie replied. She reached over, retrieved her plate, took a bite of the buttered toast and sat quietly chewing on it while Charles picked at the beef left on Violet’s breakfast plate.
‘What is it about cold breakfast meat that makes it taste so good?’ he wondered aloud, taking a large slice of the beef and stuffing it into his mouth.
‘I don’t know, but I still cannot face eating beef at any hour,’ she replied, turning her nose up. ‘All I can think of is how offended our Hindu neighbours in India would be if they found out you were eating cow.’
Charles laughed. He wiped his hands on his mother’s discarded napkin and excused himself from the table. ‘Don’t be long; the sooner we get around to Strathmore House to see Lucy, the better.’ He reached over and ruffled her hair, before making a beeline for the door, leaving Millie sitting alone in the breakfast room, still chewing on her toast.
Charles’ little errands took a lot longer than expected, and it was close to noon before brother and sister reached the steps of Strathmore House.
The first sign that something was amiss was when a footman answered the front door, rather than Hargreaves, the Radley family butler. The young man was not wearing a coat and the sleeves of his shirt were rolled up. It was not exactly how one would expect a servant to answer the front door of a major house.
He looked rather surprised to see anyone calling at the front door and gave them both a quizzical look before asking, ‘Yes, may I help you?’
Charles looked at Millie.
‘Charles and Millie Ashton to see Lady Lucy Radley, if you please,’ he replied, and offered his card.
The footman took the card, gave it a quick glance and screwed up his face. ‘They are gone.’ He offered the card back to Charles, who refused to take it.
‘What do you mean gone? Gone where?’ Millie asked.
The footman looked from brother to sister, then appeared to remember what he was supposed to tell visitors to the house. He straightened his back and announced, ‘The Duke and Duchess of Strathmore are not in residence in London at present. They and their family have adjourned to their country estate in Scotland.’
Millie’s mouth fell open and an involuntary gasp escaped. She took hold of Charles’s hand and squeezed it tight.
The footman started to close the large black door. Having delivered his message, he evidently expected the visitors would silently nod their heads and go away, leaving him to get back to whatever task involved him wearing his shirtsleeves above the elbow.
Charles stepped forward and placed his boot in the doorway. ‘The entire Radley family has quit London for their estate in Scotland?’ he asked.
‘Yes, I just hadn’t got round to taking off the front door knocker yet,’ the footman replied, nonplussed.
‘The whole family, including all their children?’
‘Yes.’
‘When will they return?’ Charles pressed. Millie was grateful that her brother was determined not to leave until he got the full story.
The put-upon footman took a deep breath and replied slowly, ‘The Radley family, including Lord Brooke, Mr Radley, Lord Stephen, Lady Lucy and Lady Emma have gone to Scotland and will not be back for another six weeks. As such they are not receiving visitors at Strathmore House at present. Is there anything else I can tell you, Sir?’
Six weeks!
Millie bit down hard on her lip and tasted blood. Last night had been bad enough, but this was utter humiliation. Here she was, standing in full public view on the front steps of one of London’s grandest houses, discovering just how insignificant she really was in the lives of the Radley family. They had left London without a word.
Any other young miss would likely have dissolved into tears by now and fled, but Millie stood still, her back ramrod straight. The only outward sign of her struggle to maintain her composure was how tightly she held on to her brother’s hand. If she squeezed any harder, she feared she might break one of his bones.
‘I see. Thank you. We shall call again when the family has returned,’ Charles replied.
Charles removed his foot from the door and the footman let out a sigh of relief. The door closed. He turned to Millie with a relaxed smile plastered on his face, then gently prised her fingers from his hand and kissed the back of her glove.
As he bent over her hand, he whispered. ‘Smile, Millie, smile. If anyone is looking out from the other houses, they must see that we are laughing off our mistake. Come on, let us walk home. I for one could do with a stiff drink.’
She did as he asked and managed a half-smile and a nod of her head.
‘Well done my girl, and don’t you worry, I shall make Lord Brooke pay for this,’ Charles vowed, as Millie took his arm. ‘No one nearly ruins my sister and then disappears without a word. I knew I should have given him a thrashing last night.’
They had reached the street and were preparing to turn for home when the front door of Strathmore House opened once more and Hargreaves raced down the front steps after them. When he got halfway down the stairs, and had their attention, he slowed his pace to a walk. Reaching Charles’s side, he offered him his hand. Charles shook it and then casually put his hand in his pocket.
‘I am so sorry that you were received in such a poor manner. Marshall is a good boy, but he can be a little vague at times. Fortunately for us all, he did find me and give me your card,’ Hargreaves said.
‘The family leaves for Scotland at this time every year. They were due to depart later in the week, but his Grace announced to the staff late last night that they were to leave early this morning. The whole house has been up all night packing, ready for a pre-dawn departure. The first thing that some members of the family knew of the change of plans was when they were roused from their beds early this morning. His Grace likes to get a full day’s journey in on the first day so the family is able to stay overnight at the Earl of Wiltmore’s estate.’
Hargreaves gave Millie a sympathetic smile. ‘I am sure Lady Lucy would have sent a message to you, Miss Ashton, but since they left in such a hurry, it probably slipped her mind. She did seem terribly distracted this morning.’