Lies in Love (31 page)

“Talia, are you okay?”
Sara stood holding a canister of dahlias, staring at Talia’s
hands.

“What?” Seeing
Sara’s focus, Talia looked down at her hands, realizing she’d
been mindlessly destroying an orchid.

“What’s wrong,
Tal? You’ve been out of sorts all day.” Sara slid the
orchid away from her. “Did something happen between you and
Landon?” Sara’s eyes quickly darted in his direction.

“What? Why would you
say that?” Talia’s voice wavered, trying to bury the
thoughts of Landon’s
I
love you
that wouldn’t leave her alone.

“You’ve been
lethargic all day. Something’s bothering you.”

Quick thinking on Talia’s
part provided her response. “I’m fine. I just have a lot
on my mind with this wedding coming up. I don’t want to let
Marisa down.”

Sara looked skeptically at
her sister. “Okay.”

Talia could tell from that
one word that Sara didn’t believe her, but she was trying.
Talia wished that Marisa’s wedding
was
what was troubling her, but it was truly the farthest thing from her
mind. When Sara walked away, Talia pulled the orchid back in front of
her trying to repair the damage, but it was useless. The petals were
crushed and the stem was broken just below the blossom. There was no
repairing such a delicate flower. Giving up hope, she dropped it in
the trash and followed her feet upstairs to her apartment. She was
feeling too much like that orchid, fragile and in need of repair, but
potentially too broken to ever be fixed. As much as she tried with
Landon, she worried that she’d never be able to truly give all
of herself again. She’d meandered into the spare bedroom and
curled up on the window seat, staring at the traffic below, when she
heard Landon’s voice from the living room.

“Tal, you up here?”

Talia tried to compose
herself. She didn’t want Landon to see how broken she was. She
didn’t want to lose him, as much as trusting him scared her.
“I’m in here.” She stood from the window seat and
began toying with her collection of hats on the bed.

“Tal?” Landon
rounded the corner to the spare bedroom and stopped at the door,
staring at the assortment of hats on the bed. “Wow, I wasn’t
expecting that.”

She instantly remembered
that Landon had yet to come into this room and see just one of her
many eccentricities. She’d begun collecting an array of hats
after Mason betrayed her and she’d tried to hide them all in
this room, but now Landon was seeing just one more piece of evidence
pointing to her brokenness. She picked up a black fedora she’d
found at a vintage shop just days after her breakup with Mason.

“Petal?”
Landon’s voice was cautious.

She took a deep breath and
looked up at him, not saying a word.

“Are you okay, baby?”

Baby?
Landon
had never called her baby. Talia had grown to like that about him,
because it was the term of endearment Mason always used with her. She
tried to brush off the feelings of hatred that the word evoked before
she answered. “I’m fine.” She forced an artificial
smile.

“You don’t look
fine.” He took a cautious step toward her.

“Gee, thanks.”
She set the fedora on the bed and walked toward the door, Landon
grasping her arm as she passed.

“What’s going
on? You haven’t been yourself today.”

“Just really focused
on this wedding coming up, that’s all.”

Landon stared suspiciously.
“So you came upstairs?”

She knew she was caught, but
she couldn’t tell him the truth, that she felt broken. She
couldn’t risk losing him and that was inevitable if he found
out how undeserving of his love she really was. She searched for
something, anything, to say to keep him from seeing through her
facade. “Move in with me.”

“What?” Landon
began shaking his head, evidently trying to grasp what Talia had just
said.

“Move in here, with
me.”
What
am I doing? Did I really just say that?
“You’re
here every night anyway.”

“So this is about
convenience?” Landon looked baffled.

“No.” Talia
looked out of the window. “This is about me wanting you here,”
she turned back to face him, “with me.”

Landon ran his hand through
his hair, just staring at her.

“Say something.”

“What about the
girls?”

“I think the apartment
would be a little crowded if they moved in here.”

“No, Talia. You know
what I mean. I’m trying to keep the peace here. The girls still
haven’t fully come to terms with,” he motioned his hand
between them, “us.”

“I don’t care.
This isn’t about them. This is about you and me.”
Am
I really trying to argue my case here? I’m not even sure I want
him to move in. If he was here, it would be so much easier for him to
see all of my faults. If he was here, I would have nowhere to hide.

“Are you sure?”

She swallowed the lump in
her throat and forced out, “Uh-huh.”

Landon stepped within inches
of her and placed his hands on either side of her neck, coaxing her
eyes to his. “We don’t have to do this if you’re
not ready.”

The fact that he could read
her so well scared her even more. Looking in his eyes, though, she
felt a peace come over her. Transfixed to his gaze she whispered,
“I’m ready.” She couldn’t breathe as his
thumbs softly brushed up and down her neck.

His forehead fell forward,
resting against hers. “I love you, Talia.”

Her eyes fluttered closed
when she felt her heart shatter beneath his intense gaze. She could
feel that tickle in the back of her throat warning of the tears that
were certain to fall and she breathed deep, trying to force them
back. She stood silently just listening to the sound of him breathing
while the words
I
love you
continued to bounce around in her head. Trying to bury her emotions,
she asked again, “So will you move in with me?”

Landon breathed deep. “Yes.”

Talia pressed her lips to
his, feeling a few hot tears trickle down her face. When the moisture
met her lips, Landon pulled away.

“Are you crying?”

She quickly wiped at her
cheeks.

“Talia, what’s
wrong?”

She shook her head,
procuring a lackluster smile. “I’m just happy.” She
stepped back from Landon, needing to get out of this moment. “I
should get back to work. We’ve got a very important wedding
this weekend.” She stepped around him and headed back
downstairs.

When the work day had
concluded, Landon made the short trip to his brother’s to pack
up his clothes and necessities. He wasn’t sure Talia was truly
ready for this move, but after their talk he watched her mood
brighten and he didn’t want to dampen that so he avoided
questioning her again. He wanted this move more than she could ever
know, but he sensed fear in her. It was in her eyes every time he
said he loved her and it was there when he agreed to move in. He
tried to convince himself he was just imagining things, but deep down
he knew it was there. There was no denying that something was eating
at her. He was envisioning that frightened look in her eyes as he
stuffed the last of his clothes into a duffle bag.

“Landon, you here?”
his brother’s voice came from the living area.

“In the bedroom.”

Dawson entered the room in
his usual teacher attire, a pair of pressed khaki slacks with a plaid
button-down shirt and solid tie covered by a sweater vest. Landon had
seen this ensemble on his brother many times.

“Where you going?”
Dawson eyed the overstuffed bag on Landon’s bed.

“Talia asked me to
move in with her.” Landon forced the zipper shut and looked to
his brother.

“Are you serious?”
Dawson looked stunned.

“Yeah.” Landon
stood unyielding.

The lines on Dawson’s
face intensified. “Are you sure you’re ready for this?
It’s kinda fast.”

“I’m sure.”
Landon picked up his bag and ambled toward the living room, hearing
his brother following close behind.

“I’m worried
about you, bro. You’re getting in over your head. I’m all
for changing your life, but so quick?” Dawson stared
speculatively at his brother. “It’s just too much too
fast. This is your first real relationship and I couldn’t stand
to see you broken like Dad is.”

Landon dropped his bag on
the couch and turned on Dawson. “Don’t compare me to him.
I’m nothing like him.”

“I know you’re
not, but damn it, Landon. You’re all I truly have left of our
dysfunctional family.”

Landon’s eyes shot
wide at his brother’s abruptness. He hadn’t heard his
brother swear since high school. “I know.” He fell to the
couch, dropping his head to his hands. With his eyes clenched closed,
he felt his brother take a seat next to him.

“You don’t have
to do this. You don’t have to rush things just to prove you
aren’t who you used to be. I know you’ve changed. I know
you care about her.”

“I love her, Dawson.
She’s everything to me.” As deep as he felt the words, he
couldn’t face his brother as he said them.

“You love her.”

Landon could tell Dawson
wasn’t questioning his words, but he knew his brother was
worried.

“And how does she feel
about you?”

“She asked me to move
in with her. I think that speaks volumes.” Landon was still
trying to convince himself of that. In his heart, he believed she
loved him, but his mind wasn’t on the same page.

“Maybe you should give
it a few days. Make sure this is what you both really want.”

“No, I’m not
waiting. I know this is what we want. I’m doing this.”
Landon stood from the couch, trying to get away from his brother.

“Why are you so
adamant about this? What are you afraid of?”

“I’m not…”
Landon spun around to face his brother. “I love her, Dawson. I
just have to help her see that she loves me too.”

“Landon.” Dawson
got up to stand face to face with his brother. “You can’t
make her love you.”

“Yeah, I think I
remember hearing that in a song once.”

Dawson chuckled. “Moving
in with her won’t make her love you. It might be the one factor
that pushes her away.”

Landon shook his head.
“You’re wrong. She needs me there with her. We both need
this.” He wasn’t just trying to convince his brother. He
knew he was also trying desperately to convince himself.

Dawson’s lips pressed
in a thin line as he nodded. “Okay.” He started for the
door, but stopped briefly and asked, ““You still coming
for dinner tomorrow night?”

“Of course. It’s
your birthday.” Landon saw the curve of Dawson’s lip as
he formed some mischievous plan in his mind.

“Why don’t you
bring your girlfriend along? Let me meet her.” He scratched at
the thin layer of stubble on his jaw.

“I know what you’re
thinking. You think if she doesn’t gel with the family I’ll
rethink the move. I don’t need you to micromanage my life.”

“I’m just trying
to watch out for you. I don’t want you…” Dawson
stopped short.

“I know, I know. You
don’t want me to end up like Dad. I get it.” Landon
rolled his eyes.

“So I’ll see you
tomorrow?”

“Yeah, I’ll be
there.”

Landon didn’t say a
word as he watched his brother walk out of the apartment. Dawson made
perfect sense, but Landon couldn’t stand to listen to reason,
because he needed to be near Talia. He needed to prove to both of
them that he was exactly what she needed. She was his saving grace.
He grabbed his things and headed back to his motorcycle, putting a
stamp of finality on this next step.

Talia woke to the sound of
Landon’s motorcycle whirring in the alley. She must have dozed
off shortly after she fell into her dad’s old recliner, because
the television remote was still in her hand but the TV sat blank. She
set the remote down, listening to Landon’s bike idling below.
He left it running longer than usual and Talia got the sinking
feeling that he was getting ready to run away. Fear swept over her,
forcing in the thought that he’d finally realized she wasn’t
good enough. She knew she didn’t measure up. It was only a
matter of time before Landon found out the same thing.