Liquid crimson (16 page)

Tears filled Haig’s eyes. “I can’t deal with this.” He shook his head as he turned towards the passageway. “I’m sorry. I just can’t face either of them right now.”

“Wait!” Neo called after Haig. “Kern won’t understand when he wakes up.”

Whether Haig was out of earshot or simply ignoring him, Neo didn’t know. Not only was he left with two sleeping men, but Neo would have to explain to Kern why Haig wasn’t with him.

Neo tried to see the situation from Haig’s point of view. How would he feel if it had been Michael? Neo closed his eyes and swore silently, his hands balling into fists at his sides, his fangs slipping down to pierce his bottom lip.

With the coppery taste of blood still on his tongue, he bent over Kern. “Wake up.” Neo was surprised at the anger in his voice. Hadn’t he just tried to convince Haig that it wasn’t Kern’s fault?

The large oak tree tattooed on Kern’s back began to move as Kern struggled to push himself into a sitting position. Kern blinked his eyes and looked around. “Where am I?”

* * * *

By the time Neo walked into the house, the sun was setting and all he wanted was to assure himself Michael was safe. Before the day’s events, he’d convinced himself taking charge of the Realm was the right thing to do, but walking into his bedroom, he began to have second thoughts.

Michael was curled up under the covers in the large bed. Even in sleep, his face was a mask of unhappiness. Neo stumbled backwards several feet as he realised what he’d done. It had been so easy for him to slip into the role of King, he’d forgotten the importance of also being a mate.

From past experience, Neo knew being rescued was only the first step in the healing process. What have I done? At a time when Michael needed him more than ever, Neo hadn’t been here for him.

Stripping the clothes from his body, Neo approached the bed with trepidation. If leading the Realm meant giving less than one hundred percent to Michael, Neo knew he’d never agree to take his place as king.

Neo slid between the sheets and pressed his body against Michael’s back. Almost immediately, he felt Michael’s body stiffen. “I’m so sorry,” Neo whispered in Michael’s ear. “I should’ve been here for you.”

Michael said nothing. Neo knew he deserved the silent treatment but it stung. In the past, Michael would’ve been quick to defend
Neo’s
actions as part of what made him a leader, but, evidently, not anymore.

Neo buried his face in the riot of blond curls and searched within himself for answers. Why hadn’t he stayed with Michael instead of charging back to the chalet? It didn’t matter how many times he tried to convince himself, being a good leader wasn’t the reason.

The realisation shamed him. He hadn’t wanted to confront his own memories of life in
LaMont’s
torturous hands. Pulling away from Michael, Neo moved to a chair across the room. “I’m selfish,” he admitted, burying his face in his hands.

Michael didn’t move or speak.

“I didn’t comfort you because I knew you would need to talk about what happened to you, and I’m not strong enough to listen. I’ve tried for the last six centuries to get the memories out of my head, out of my dreams. I can’t handle the thought that you’ve experienced a lot of what I went through. You’re my Michael, my innocent. That world should’ve never touched you, and if it weren’t for me, it never would have.”

“You’re an asshole,” Michael said without moving an inch. “A self-centred asshole,” he added. “Newsflash, Neo, the world doesn’t revolve around you. Shitty things happen to other people, too.”

“I know. And you’re right,” Neo agreed.

With a sudden burst of energy, Michael threw off the covers and jumped out of bed. He charged towards Neo angrier than Neo had ever seen him. “Sometimes things need to be about me. You barely had time to dump me off here before leaving again. And when you came back, it wasn’t to see how I was doing.”

Neo stood. He opened his mouth to argue, but Michael held up his hand, looking older than he ever had. When did that happen? Had
LaMont’s
coven done something to age Michael?

“Don’t fucking try it. You came back here this morning because you
needed
something from me. You do that a lot,
ya
know? Oh, you talk a good game, whispering words of love, trying to make me believe I’m actually important to you.”

Michael’s eyes narrowed. “But when I needed you, you let your demons come between us. What happened to you was horrible, and I’d do anything to take those memories away, but it happened a long time ago. Get the fuck over it. I refuse to be your trough to drink from when you need it. If you can’t at least put us on equal ground in our own home, I’m done.”

Without another word, Michael stormed out of the bedroom completely naked.

Neo stood with his mouth hanging open, wondering what had just happened. He’d expected Michael to be hurt by the way he’d acted but not angry, and what was all that about being a trough? And what had happened to the man he loved to age him so rapidly?

Michael had been right about one thing. Neo did let his demons get between them. Although he’d tried to convince himself he was doing what was best for the Realm, in reality, it had nothing at all to do with the Realm, and everything to do with his fears. Grabbing his pants, Neo dressed and went in search of answers.

* * * *

Lounging on his throne in the high heavens, Zeus stared down at Neo. “It’s polite to make an appointment before barging in.”

“I don’t have time to play your games,” Neo spat. “I have questions that only you can answer.”

Zeus sighed as if he was already bored of
Neo’s
company. Of course he was. Neo didn’t have tits. “What are they?”

“What happened to Michael?”

Zeus chuckled, the smug
sonofabitch
. “I haven’t seen Michael since he was an infant. Did you ask
him
?”

“He’s aging rapidly, and I don’t even think Michael’s aware of it.”

“I find it hard to believe you would
rid
your home of mirrors. You’ve always struck me as rather vane.” Zeus smiled. “You’re a lot like me in that regard. Beauty is to be enjoyed, savoured. I’m a handsome man, and I know it.”

“Michael?” Neo prompted, running out of patience. He’d always hated the way his father could turn any conversation around to focus it on himself.

“You’re a greedy little bastard, Neo. I guess you take after me in that regard as well.”

Neo rolled his eyes. If he didn’t need the information only his father could provide, Neo would have happily told Zeus to fuck off. “What does being greedy have to do with Michael’s aging?”

“You’re using his light faster than his body can produce it. You’re literally sucking the life out of him, so don’t bother looking for someone else to blame. Try looking in one of those mirrors you’ve always enjoyed so much. For you, the ability to walk in the sunlight is a gift. From what I’ve observed, you’ve started to treat it as a right, and if you continue to do so, not only the gift but the vessel will be taken from you.”

“I don’t understand. I thought Michael was created for me. How can you just take that away?”

Zeus’ laughter bounced off the marble walls, forcing Neo to cover his ears or risk rupturing his eardrums. “Everything was created at one point. Yes, Michael was created to help you lead, to give you back some of what was taken from you, but my hope was that he could do more for you than that. The more I talk with you, the more I realise how alike we are. Perhaps it was a mistake to think you could lead. When you were a child, your heart was full of thoughts for others. You were the perfect choice for a king, but then you were changed, and I’m not just talking about the vampire part of you. You became a different person. A true king has the ability to see beyond himself. You’re so obsessed with the wrongs done to you that you haven’t even stopped to consider the other Blessed Creatures. How many of them could have used your wisdom and protection over the centuries?”

Although there was a lot of truth in his father’s speech, Neo went back to the one thing that meant more to him than anything. “But why will you take Michael from me?”

“I won’t. You will.”

“I would never do that. I love him with everything that I am,” Neo argued.

“Sadly, from what I’ve seen, that isn’t very much. You loathe half of what you are. Until you can embrace the Blessed Creature you’ve become, you will never truly love anything.”

Zeus rose and walked from the room without another word.
Bastard.

Chapter Ten

Michael found himself at the tasting barn, wearing nothing but a towel he’d managed to find in the laundry room. He didn’t bother knocking. Unless he was asleep or struggling with Gunnar, Ramiro would come out for him now that the sun had set.

Sure enough, ten minutes later, Ramiro stepped out into the moonlight. The handsome vampire looked beyond tired, and Neo began to wonder how big a toll nursing Gunnar was taking on him both physically and emotionally.

“How is he?” Michael asked. He adjusted the towel when he caught Ramiro’s eyes wandering.

“The same,” Ramiro answered. “But you didn’t come down here for that. I told you I would get word to you if there were any changes. So what else is bothering you?”

Michael shrugged. Now that he was there, he started to feel stupid for bothering Ramiro when he already had his hands full.

Ramiro held up a finger and opened the barn door once again. He stuck his head inside for several moments before shutting the door. “Sorry. I thought I heard Gunnar calling for me.”

“That’s okay. You’re busy. Go on back inside in case you’re needed.”

Ramiro shook his head. “Gunnar’s asleep. Tell me what’s happened to make you seek me out wearing nothing but a towel.”

“I don’t know if you can even help me, but I was wondering. What’s so bad about being a vampire?”

“That depends. I guess the biggest thing is that most vampires were victims. We had no say in what happened to us.”

Michael nodded. “But…,” Michael sighed. “I was given no choice in how I was made, no one does. Spiro told me earlier today that my real parents are both gods of some sort. I had no say in that. I am what I am, but I do have a say in the kind of man I’ve become because I had nothing to do with how I was made.”

Ramiro’s browse rose to disappear under the black curls hanging down his forehead. “Well then, you’ve discovered one of the greatest secrets of life. I’m impressed.”

“How do you deal with what happened to you in
LaMont’s
dungeon?”

Ramiro scratched at his jaw. “Are you asking for yourself or Neo?”

“Both, I think. I wasn’t put through all the things the two of you had happen, and I wasn’t in there very long, but I was scared.”

“Because you had no control?”

“Yes.”

Ramiro nodded. “There are different ways to deal with trauma. You can pick yourself up and make sure you’re never again a victim, or you can seal yourself off from the world, and never get beyond it. Does that make sense?”

“That’s why you began as Ian’s head of security,” Michael surmised.

“Yes. And that’s why Neo built this vineyard and surrounded himself with
weres
instead of vampires. He’s never moved beyond being a victim.”

“How can I help him?” Michael asked.

“You can’t do anything more than you’re already doing.”

Michael let out a snort. “Yeah, about that, I yelled at him. Told him he was a self-centred asshole, told him to get over the stuff that happened to him and told him to stop using my neck as a feeding trough.”

Ramiro began to chuckle. He tried to stop, even going as far as to cover his mouth with his hand. “Good for you. You’re probably one of the few people who could walk away from a confrontation like that with your head still attached.”

“I was just so angry with him,” Michael defended himself.

“Angry at Neo or what happened to you?” Ramiro asked.

Michael opened his mouth to say something before snapping it closed again. He’d spent the entire day trying to convince himself that Neo only thought of him when it was feeding time. Yes, he’d definitely needed Neo when he woke earlier, but was that reason enough to feel and say the things he did? Had he transferred the anger of the last several days to Neo because that was the only way he knew to deal with it?

“Michael!” Neo barked, running down the path from the house.

“I’ll leave the two of you alone,” Ramiro said. “The way you’re dressed…” He blew out a breath. “I
kinda
like my head where it is.”

By the time Neo reached Michael, Ramiro had already disappeared into the tasting barn. “Don’t get mad at him. Ramiro was just trying to help me understand.”

Neo started to reach for Michael, but stopped himself, dropping his arms to his sides. “You shouldn’t have to go to a stranger for that. I should’ve been there for you. I’m sorry.”

“Ramiro isn’t a stranger. He’s proven himself to be a good friend.”

“Maybe so.” Neo shuffled his feet for several moments before reaching out to take Michael’s hand. “I went to see my father.”