Little Wolf (15 page)

Nathaniel took a while to answer. “It comes with the position. It doesn’t mean anything.”

Tim looked up. Nathaniel seemed uncomfortable. Maybe no one had ever asked him about it before. “Are you embarrassed?” Tim asked in disbelief. “Because you know what you’re doing. You have to. Those tight pants and that open shirt cannot be an accident.”

Nathaniel snorted and frowned, first at him and then at his clothes. “It’s expected,” he grumbled after a minute. “I’m expected to dress to intimidate others.”

“And you went with porn star cop?” Tim gulped after the question came out, and Carl started cackling. Nathaniel’s frown deepened. Tim hurried on, reaching out to pat Nathaniel’s chest. Hot. Nathaniel’s skin was so hot. His chest hair was soft, springy. Tim gasped, and then Nathaniel inhaled sharply, and Tim yanked his hand back. “You’re right. That’s the image the town wants. You should dress however you feel powerful and that look…
oh fuck
that look works for you. The town is definitely yours for the taking in that outfit.
Shit
. I bet these weren’t the questions you were expecting me to ask.”

“I never know what you’re going to ask.” Nathaniel put a hand to his chest, then dropped it. “I get hot if I button up my shirt,” he muttered a second later, as if Tim had made him self-conscious.

“Then don’t. You shouldn’t deny us that view anyway.” Tim was an idiot. It was a fact. “My uncl… Ray… they wore suits and…. They wore suits. Intimidating suits in two totally different styles,” Tim recalled then blinked as several realizations hit him. “How much of being in charge is about maintaining the appearance of strength?” He didn’t wait for an answer. “It must be exhausting… and of course you can’t appear exhausted either, not in public.” Had his uncle felt exhausted? Tim had been young when they’d had their sessions, but now that he thought about it, he remembered his uncle sitting heavily in his chair in the library when they were alone.

Nathaniel crooked a small smile he seemed unaware of. “You can show exhaustion before your pack. They’d understand. But most leaders only show that much weakness to a few people, sometimes to just one person.”

Tim bit his lip and glanced at Carl, who had stopped cackling. Tim scratched uncomfortably at his nose. Scents weren’t telling him much. He crept closer. “The suit makes them feel strong, I bet.
Appear weak when you are strong, and strong when you are weak
.” Tim was wearing flannel and jeans again, but he needed a different sort of armor. “You look good. You
know
I mean that.”

“The ‘baby wolves,’” Nathaniel said after a moment, returning to their earlier topic, his scent a warm, cautious cloud. “I know about them. I’d have to be blind and missing my nose, but… I’m not looking for a mate among some impressionable kids.” He straightened his shoulders. “I’d need… I’d need someone strong. I wouldn’t push someone into this unless they could push back.”

“Some other strong type.” Tim couldn’t deny Nathaniel would need someone on his level. It was no wonder he only took lovers for a few weeks every year. Getting someone to sleep with him was easy, but getting someone to stay would be harder. Who could deal with an entire town of weres looking to him for answers all the time? Even when Nathaniel wasn’t working, he was working. Tim felt himself droop, though he tried to cover it with a smile. “That’s who you’ll mate with, huh?”

People in this town mentioned mates a lot, usually before they saw Tim. Then they stopped talking. His uncle had mentioned mates once or twice, in an abstract way. Silas hadn’t had anyone in his life like that, not that Tim had ever seen. His mother hadn’t mentioned them, that he could remember. But Tim assumed a mate was like a husband or a wife, possibly with biting. “So,” Tim said abruptly, a little loudly judging from how Nathaniel winced. “Where do you look for a good mate?”

“I don’t.” Nathaniel seemed annoyed now. He was so moody. “You don’t look for a mate. If it happens, it happens.”

“
Que será, será
? Really? From the guy who decided I need werewolf lessons in order to protect myself?” Tim frowned back at him. Nathaniel had told him to ask questions; he shouldn’t get pissy now.

“You’re scared of your notion of alpha wolves, but I don’t intimidate you, do I?” Nathaniel inquired after a beat, and Tim opened his mouth.

“
Good generals inspire their men to come to them
.” Tim quoted his uncle without thinking, then flinched. Nathaniel smelled like shock, and for once Carl didn’t have a thing to say. Tim cleared his throat and pulled at his shirt. “I mean, people trust you to give a shit about their problems. They come to you. So you probably aren’t a jerk. I didn’t mean to sound like a history book or a lecture by MacArthur or anything. It isn’t like I can quote the Art of War, though if I could, that’s not too weird, right?”

He briefly shut up when he realized Nathaniel and Carl, and now Robin’s Egg, who was coming in with a to-go bag in her hand, were staring at him.

“I like to read.” It was a decent excuse. “I should have read were literature instead, I suppose.”

“It might have helped,” Nathaniel answered, with only a small pause. “Why didn’t you?”

Tim thought about lying since only Nathaniel would know. But that was the problem. As far as Tim could tell, Nathaniel had been honest with him, even when it embarrassed him.

“I thought, the less I knew the better,” he admitted with a sigh, not exactly mumbling. Tim wasn’t telling the whole truth, but all he had were more questions, like how his uncle had expected Tim to know things like this, or why he hadn’t wanted him to,
if
he hadn’t wanted him to.

“Is that for me?” Nathaniel touched Tim’s hand on the counter, then walked over to take the to-go bag from Robin’s Egg before Tim could raise his head. Nathaniel was making a big deal out of the food, considering he could have smelled the pork and cornbread from across the room. But he was opening the bag and inhaling, and probably, though Tim couldn’t prove it, diverting some of the attention from Tim.

“Son of a bitch,” Tim whispered at him.

Nathaniel just kept on talking to Robin’s Egg. “It smells delicious, but I didn’t order anything, Egg. Your fairy magic at work again?”

“Not
my
magic, Sheriff.” Robin’s Egg flashed a grin and winked at Tim before walking off again.

“I hate you,” Tim called after her without much force.

“Guess a good night’s rest did you some good,” Carl remarked and gave Tim a smile.

Tim looked at the door for help or distraction, but of course he’d scared off his one customer.

“You son of a bitch,” Nathaniel whispered at Tim.

Tim had the awful feeling that he was blushing. That was him, the blushing virgin standing before the dominant male.

He snapped his head up for the sake of his dignity. “Oh my God, it’s only some food. You were late and I figured you might be in a hurry. Clearly you weren’t, because you won’t leave.” He glared, red cheeks or not, and waved his arms frantically when he saw Nathaniel’s soft expression.

“I knew there was more to you than sarcasm and pointy edges,” Nathaniel told him, making the heat in Tim’s face worse.

Tim waved him away, hoping his embarrassment would go with him. “Gah! Go.” He pointed to the door, not caring who saw him ordering around Wolf Paw’s boss of all bosses.

“Little Wolf.” Nathaniel was so pleased and gentle it was making Tim’s cheeks burn, but at least Nathaniel took his lunch and headed to the door. “Did
you
eat?”

“Yes,” Tim hissed. Nathaniel looked like Tim had made his week. It was ridiculous and stupid, and he obviously had mental problems. “I have another question for you. Are you stupid, or do you really not get that I am trying to get rid of you?”

No, Tim was the one with the mental deficiencies. Maybe Luca had warped his development.

Nathaniel didn’t exactly flinch. He was too controlled for that. It was more like his good mood evaporated, although he continued to smile. Someone who didn’t know him might not have noticed, but Tim had seen him in his own house last night, relaxed and almost laughing as he’d toasted bread. Nathaniel listened to what Tim said like it mattered. Tim might have been like a bee buzzing around him, but Tim had managed to sting him just the same. He didn’t have to smell the air to know he’d done it.

Nathaniel should—and did—have a ton of people who wanted him around. It shouldn’t bother him that Tim had made a comment about getting rid of him, but it must have, because he was already heading toward the door.

“Maybe I am stupid.” Nathaniel sighed, irritation or frustration making the sound heavy and loud. Nathaniel looked away from him. “I’ll see you tonight, Tim.” If he had been wearing a hat, he probably would have tipped it as he walked out. The door closed behind him before Tim could swallow. He didn’t think he’d ever felt like this much of an asshole, and he wasn’t even sure why.

Nathaniel should not care about Tim’s opinion. Yet for some reason he did.

“What the hell is wrong with me?” Tim asked the second Nathaniel was gone, and looked at Carl. Carl didn’t answer, not even taking advantage of the prime opening for an insult that Tim had given him. He pointedly went back to his twice-read newspaper.

Tim let out a breath before facing the window. Nathaniel was already out of sight. “Shit,” Tim murmured, then rushed out from behind the counter. “The bridge is yours,” he told Carl with a salute as he hurried to the door, though once he was outside, he stopped.

Walking these streets alone a few days ago, and walking them alone now were two different experiences. He didn’t know whether to search the traffic for Luca, or some other suspicious character, or duck back inside where he could pretend it was safer.

Nathaniel probably wasn’t upset, and Tim was going to look really stupid when he caught up with him. He was risking himself for no reason. But Tim lifted his head to catch the scent of him in case Nathaniel wasn’t headed to the station, then started walking quickly, glancing over his shoulder once he was across the street. Thankfully, Nathaniel had been stopped a block ahead by some flirty newcomer asking for a good hotel.

“Wait! I have another question!” Tim called out as he came up on them, and Nathaniel and the tourist both turned. Nathaniel had on his impassive sheriff face. It was probably more armor, which should have made Tim defensive and geared toward a fight, but mostly made him feel like an even bigger jerk.

“You are a princess, you know that?” he mumbled at Nathaniel, then winced, because way to make it worse, Tim. Nathaniel crossed his arms and didn’t say anything. He was still holding the to-go bag. Tim glanced from it to the tourist and then back to Nathaniel. “Er, that wasn’t actually my question. My question was, um, if I will see you later.”

That… sounded almost like a date. Tim’s eyes went wide with panic. “I mean, if you are picking me up tonight.” That
definitely
sounded like a date. He decided to blame it on the tourist. Did no one in this town respect boundaries? The tourist was watching, like this was his business. Like he
lived
here. Tim exhaled. Nathaniel’s eyebrows went up.

“Oh, fuck it.” Tim clearly couldn’t control his mouth. “We could get dinner on our way home.” That one, he had to admit, was kind of on purpose. But the tourist needed to vanish, now, so Tim could apologize.

“I have to work. Zoe agreed to pick you up tonight. She’s off.” Nathaniel was ever so bland. Maybe he knew what Tim had been trying to do with that last one.

Tim blinked. “Oh.” He didn’t know what else to do now but stand there awkwardly and look like someone who had asked the sheriff out and been shut down. Which, in a way, he had.

Suddenly he was even more breathless.

“I’m free,” the tourist chimed in, suddenly looking at Tim like Tim was what’s for dinner.

Tim was both flattered and confused. “Are you serious?” he sputtered after a moment. “Beat it. The sheriff and I have things to discuss.” He flashed his teeth. “My sheriff, mine. Our conversation. Not yours.”

“You really can’t help yourself, can you?” Nathaniel asked, bringing Tim’s gaze up. Tim inhaled, carefully, and then let it out. He was going to breathe like a normal were, if only for the sake of his pride.

“I really can’t. But uh, sorry?” Tim tried. “You don’t have to put up with me. You shouldn’t. You seem….”
Perfect. Wonderful. A fantasy in the flesh.
“Nice,” he substituted, though it wasn’t the correct word. He scrubbed his palms on his jeans. “I am not nice. I want
things
.” No need to explain. Even the tourist would get his meaning. Tim was blushing enough that people would feel the heat from blocks away.

Nathaniel, however, was being uncharacteristically slow, or pretending to be, because he was secretly evil like that. He had the town fooled, but Tim knew the truth.

“What kinds of things?” Nathaniel wasn’t letting Tim look away. “Because wanting those things doesn’t make you not nice. Not admitting it and treating others badly when you get flustered does.”

“Oh,” Tim said again, like a genius. Not one of his uncle’s lessons had ever been about how to interact with people, probably because his uncle didn’t consider anyone to be his equal and there was no need to worry about the feelings of inferiors. Tim peeked upward. “I believe I did tell you I was an asshole.”

“A blanket statement like that doesn’t excuse anything either.” Nathaniel was standing straight and tall. He made righteous indignation look sexy.

“Oh.” Tim was on a roll here. “Is this like an actual apology situation? Isn’t it enough that you got to publicly reject me a second ago? Because that didn’t feel good, even if of course I didn’t mean it like a real date. I get that just because you tolerate my presence doesn’t mean you’d go out with me. What is that anyway? I mean, you would think we wouldn’t need to have trial dating times, with our heightened senses and instincts and all, but everyone in this town seems as confused as your average human when it comes to, um, love. And sex. And all the things in between. No offense.” He glared at the tourist, who was still watching all of this, then down at the pavement. When he glanced up again, Nathaniel had a strange expression on his face, like he was trying very hard to seem stern.